Chapter 33 Absolutely Perfect
Classes at Hogwarts finally resumed on Thursday after the various weather spells throughout the castle began to wear off, and the students went off to them cheerfully enough, their spirits somewhat restored after their impromptu extra holiday courtesy of the Marauders.
Bellatrix remained absent on both Thursday and Friday, which led to school-wide speculation about whether or not she would in fact be returning, and consequently Thursday's and Friday's classes passed by uneventfully for the Gryffindor seventh years.
This extended absence gave James hope that just maybe Bellatrix wouldn't return to Hogwarts for the end of her seventh year. This seemed to be the most frequent theory currently spinning round in the Hogwarts rumor mill, but unlike loads of others, James had no wish to know what it was that was keeping Bellatrix away or where exactly she was. As long as she stayed away from his friends and most especially away from Lily, the psychotic bitch could rot in hell for all James cared.
However, James was in the minority. Most of Hogwarts was avidly curious to know what had happened to its psychotic bitch in residence. All of the other Slytherin seventh years were present and accounted for, even the ones the Gryffindors knew to have been at the Marchbankses'.
When Bellatrix wasn't present for meals on Saturday and Sunday either, James relaxed a bit. It really did seem that Bellatrix wouldn't be returning.
Which was why James was completely unprepared for the sight of Bellatrix sitting at the breakfast table and looking very much like her old self when he glanced at the Slytherin table on Monday morning.
James was so dismayed, in fact, that he simultaneously dropped the pitcher of pumpkin juice he'd been holding and began to choke on his mouthful of bacon.
"What.....is......SHE.....doing.......here?!" James managed as Sirius very obligingly whacked him on the back, the pumpkin juice flooding his lap in rivulets.
"Who?" Lily wanted to know as she dried James' robes with an airy flick of her wand. James gestured toward the Slytherin table and Lily stiffened as she followed his line of sight.
"Oh," Lily said finally in a surprisingly normal voice. Sirius, however, growled low in his throat.
"She won't be here for long if I have anything to do with it," he spat furiously.
"How could Dumbledore let her come back here?" James shook his head in disbelief.
"You can't be surprised by this," Lily spoke matter of factly. "Of course she came back. There's only half of the year left, why wouldn't she?"
"I promise she won't come anywhere near you, Lily," James whispered earnestly, his breath tickling Lily's ear. "I won't let her."
"Thank you," Lily replied, smiling at James. "But I can take care of myself. And I really doubt that Bellatrix is in any shape to be causing herself extra trouble at the moment." With that, she hurried to catch up to Alice, Dorcas, and Morwenna, leaving the Marauders, muttering darkly to each other, to follow her to class.
* * *
Snape had watched the Gryffindor table discreetly all through breakfast, avidly curious to observe their reactions to Bellatrix's presence. He had been unhappily surprised by their restraint; apart from Potter's small mishap, none of them had given Snape any satisfaction. This was highly disappointing, as Snape had been looking forward to watching the Gryffindors' reactions ever since Bellatrix had entered his study room the night before.
For one who prided himself on his ability to predict others' reactions, especially those of his housemates, Snape had been quite surprised to see her standing there. Bellatrix was a shadow of her former self; her eyes were rimmed with purple bruise-like circles and exhaustion was plain in every line of her body, but the maniacal grin was the same as it ever was, and the insanity in her eyes burned a bit brighter.
"Severus, darling," she'd greeted him with more warmth than was her wont. "Have you missed me, pet?"
Snape had eyed her speculatively, refusing to rise to her bait. Seeing her appearance now, he wondered just how badly she'd been hurt and by whom, and what exactly she'd been doing all this time.
"I am relieved to know you are well," he stated a moment later, keeping all inflection deliberately from his voice. "May I inquire as to your whereabouts?"
"You may," Bellatrix taunted him coyly, eyes dancing. She was plainly enjoying her secrets. Snape decided not to pursue it further.
"And the person who did you this injury?" Snape tried a different tact. "Still living?"
Bellatrix's eyes flashed fire. "Yes," she hissed, her hands clenching involuntarily.
Snape was impressed; whoever had bested Bellatrix and lived to tell the tale despite hers and the Dark Lord's best efforts must indeed be a force to be reckoned with.
"Of course," Bellatrix had recovered herself and was now prepared to launch an attack of her own, "had you seen fit to attend our little gathering, you wouldn't have to swallow your pride and ask, now would you, pet?."
Her barb hit home; Snape's eyes flickered for the barest instant, and Bellatrix's smile widened in glee.
"I'm merely inquiring out of courtesy," Snape was pleased with his cool tone and indifferent shrug. "Although," he continued as inspiration struck, "I must confess to some curiosity as regards one matter. Tell me, Bellatrix, why is it that Lily Evans lives? I was under the impression that you would jump at the opportunity to eliminate her under such ideal circumstances, considering how intensely you dislike her."
Bellatrix drew in a sharp gasping breath, and Snape permitted one of his rare smiles to show. It would appear that his hunch had been accurate. So it was Lily Evans who had gotten the best of Bellatrix. How very interesting.
"Don't mention that filthy Mudblood bitch in my presence," Bellatrix hissed in a shaking, intense voice. Her whole body was quivering with rage, and her eyes were more murderous than Snape had ever seen them. It would be the understatement of a lifetime to say that he had struck a nerve.
After a moment, Bellatrix told Snape at least part of what he wanted to know. She had been badly hurt in the Dark Lord's service at the Marchbankses' and had been in hiding with him and Lestrange ever since, recovering from her wounds. She had returned to Hogwarts at his command and out of respect for her parents, who wanted her to complete her schooling. She herself, it seemed to Snape, had very little interest in returning to Hogwarts, but Bellatrix was nothing if not loyal to both the Dark Lord and her family; there was no question of her disregarding their orders.
Then Bellatrix began to speak of the attacks, sharing anecdotes with Snape and clearly reveling in the memories as she recalled them. Snape listened to her accounts impatiently, wishing her gone so that he could process this new information properly. But it was some time before Bellatrix tired of her stories and took herself off to bed.
Alone with his thoughts at last, Snape had leaned back in his chair thoughtfully, considering what Bellatrix's presence would mean for himself and for others.
* * *
James' Monday was proving to be quite stressful. He and his fellow Gryffindors were on edge, waiting for Bellatrix or one of the other Slytherins to make some sort of move, and James, quite determined that she wouldn't come anywhere near Lily, was perhaps the worst of them all. He couldn't shake the image of Lily's pale, bleeding, pain-filled face after her encounter with Bellatrix out of his head, and it made him nearly desperate to keep Bellatrix away from Lily at any and all costs.
The only real incident occurred as the Gryffindors emerged from the Transfiguration corridor and a crowd of Slytherins that included Bellatrix were heading toward it.
Bellatrix's eyes immediately sought Lily's, and Lily didn't try to avoid her gaze; she met it coolly and stared right back, a hard expression on her face.
His heart in his throat, James had immediately jumped in front of Lily, Sirius right behind him, terrified that something would happen to her. Rosier and Avery flanked Bellatrix instantly, the pair of them clearly relishing the thought of a fight. If Professor McGonagall hadn't come along just then, there really was no telling what might have happened.
Thoroughly worn out by dinnertime, James collapsed onto the bench next to Lily. It had only been one day and he was exhausted. There was no way he could live like this; something had to be done or he'd go mad. Without telling anyone, James made up his mind to go and speak to Dumbledore directly after dinner.
* * *
For her part, Lily was really quite shocked by how little Bellatrix's return was upsetting her. Unlike James, who seemed to be nearing total collapse, Lily hadn't believed that Bellatrix would stay away from Hogwarts. It wouldn't make sense to really; she had only half a year left before she was through and school apparently hadn't been curtailing her Death Eater activities before.
But Lily felt that the real reason she wasn't distressed over Bellatrix was because of what had happened between them on New Year's. Bellatrix just wasn't as intimidating now that Lily had faced the dragon, so to speak. Now Lily knew that when it came down to life and death, she could take Bellatrix, and that knowledge was more comforting and heartening than anything else could be. Bellatrix had come for her and Lily had been the one left standing; she couldn't hurt Lily anymore.
Still, Lily didn't intend to go anywhere near Bellatrix; the hatred and madness glittering in her eyes when she and Lily had made eye contact had really been quite alarming. Lily shuddered now recalling it; what caused a person to have that look in her eyes?
Next to her at the Gryffindor table, James was picking half-heartedly at his food and Lily sighed inwardly. James had been this way all day, ever since they had seen Bellatrix at breakfast. Lily's heart tied itself into knots whenever she saw how much he wanted to protect her, and she wished she could explain to James why she wasn't worried anymore, but she wasn't sure that she could construe it in a way that he would understand.
Glancing round for something to distract her from her uncomfortable thoughts, Lily's eyes fell on Alice sitting a couple of seats away from her. When she'd seen Bellatrix this morning, initially Lily's concern had been for Alice. After all, Bellatrix had killed Alice's parents. But Alice, despite her sweet, unassuming appearance and demeanor, was much tougher than she seemed. Ever since the charges against Bellatrix had been dismissed, Alice had known she would most likely have to attend school with her and had been preparing herself. Lily didn't know how she managed it, but Alice was coping; she would be all right because she'd made up her mind to be. In the face of Alice's problems, Lily felt hers were rendered inconsequential.
* * *
A couple of hours after dinner, James mumbled an excuse to Lily and his friends in the common room and, after a quick stop in his dormitory for the Marauder's Map, made his way determinedly toward Dumbledore's office. Obviously Dumbledore was unaware of the situation, otherwise he would never have allowed Bellatrix back into the school. James would set him straight and then this would all be over and Bellatrix would be gone. It was as simple as that; Dumbledore was the wisest, most kind wizard James had ever encountered. He wouldn't knowingly let this happen.
Stopping in front of the gargoyle statue that hid the staircase to Dumbeldore's office, James consulted the map, gave the password ("sugar quill") and before he had considered it, he was on his way up to the office.
Outside the door, James did not hesitate before knocking firmly. "Enter," a familiar voice called from inside the office, and taking a deep breath, James pushed open the door.
In all of the many times James had visited it, Dumbledore's office had never changed. It was always the same friendly, fascinating clutter of objects both mundane and extraordinary, and as always, James had to resist the temptation to wander round exploring all of them.
Behind his enormous desk, Dumbledore stood. "James," he greeted warmly, his eyes full of their customary knowing twinkle. "To what do I owe this honor?"
Now that he was actually facing Dumbledore, James felt a bit awkward and wasn't quite sure how to begin.
"Er - " James managed.
"Why don't you sit down?" Dumbledore gestured to a chair, patient as ever.
Deciding that the only way he could get through this was just to say it, James braced himself and blurted: "Professor Dumbledore, I wanted to talk to you about Bellatrix."
"Ah," Dumbledore steepled his hands on his desk and looked at James keenly over the top of his spectacles. "I see. This had something to do with the tragedy at the Marchbankses,' I take it?"
James quickly told Dumbledore the entire story of Bellatrix's Death Eater escapades at the New Year's ball from her attack on Lily and her confession of killing the Prewetts to her unusual relationship with Vodemort himself.
"She can't stay here, Professor," James finished desperately, "she just can't. Not after what she's done to Lily and Alice and Merlin knows who else. The Ministry won't do anything about her, but you can. She's a Death Eater, Professor, there are witnesses."
James, I know," Dumbledore had been still and silent all the time James had been talking, listening intently. Now he leaned back slightly, a serious expression on his face.
"You - you know what?" James was a bit nonplussed.
"I am aware that Bellatrix Black is a Death Eater," Dumbledore stated calmly, his blue eyes a bit less twinkly now.
"What?!" James felt as though someone had beat a Bludger into his stomach. "But if you know, then why is she still here? Hogwarts is supposed to be safe; if you know, then why isn't that b - Bellatrix - in Azkaban where she belongs?"
Dumbledore sighed, and just for a moment, he looked very old. "It's not quite that simple, James," he explained. "No one can be expelled from Hogwarts without a legitimate reason, and Bellatrix was never charged with being a Death Eater. Without that charge, it is a baseless accusation and is not grounds for expulsion."
James knew what Dumbledore didn't add: Bellatrix's parents held significant power over the school governors; she could practically admit to being a Death Eater and manage not to be chucked out simply because of her influential connections.
"Oh," James got out, trying desperately to hide his disappointment and worry.
"Also," Dumbledore continued, slightly less solemn now, "I have always believed in the old adage about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. And as long as Bellatrix is at Hogwarts, I can prevent her from causing serious harm." Dumbledore's eyes glimmered.
A phrase that Remus said quite often popped into James' head at that moment. "Dumbledore has his reasons." And sitting there in Dumbledore's office, James realized just how true that statement was. It had always used to annoy him whenever Remus said it, but now somehow, it made him feel a bit better about it all.
"I understand, sir," James spoke finally.
Dumbledore merely smiled back at him kindly, and hesitating, James rose to go.
"Was there something else on your mind, James?" Dumbledore asked mildly. Impulsively, James spun round.
"Could I just ask you something, Professor?" James took a deep breath. "Why did you make me Head Boy?" he blurted before he could decide not to.
"There are many reasons, James," Dumbledore seemed to be amused by the question.
"What I mean is - " James struggled to explain. "I'm not exactly a model student. Why didn't you make Remus or somebody else who's responsible Head Boy? I reckon they would have deserved it more."
"No one deserves to be Head Boy more than you do, James," Dumbledore replied quietly. "I have always felt that you possessed the potential to be a leader, and during this past year you have realized that potential admirably. I was very impressed by your actions during the Whomping Willow incident with Sirius and Severus Snape; you proved yourself capable of great things."
Dumbledore paused as Fawkes his phoenix came to perch on the desk. James watched the bird, dazed; he'd had no idea that Dumbledore thought so highly of him. He glanced round to find Dumbledore watching him with a knowing twinkle in his eye.
"And of course," Dumbledore continued, his eyes dancing, "In dark times such as these, we could all use some laughter in our lives, and there's never a dull moment with you and Mr. Black around."
James grinned at that, slightly embarrassed by all the trouble he had caused the headmaster over the years, including his recent foray into meteorology.
"Thanks for telling me, sir," James said as he turned to go once again, a hellion grin still tugging at his lips. "And - thanks for telling me about the other thing too."
"You're quite welcome, James," Dumbledore answered comfortably, returning James' smile. "I hope I've helped to put your mind at ease."
"Yeah, sort of," James ran a hand through his hair distractedly.
"Miss Evans is very fortunate to have someone like you care so much for her," Dumbledore added. Not all sure how to respond to that or if he was exactly ready to discuss his feelings for his girlfriend with the headmaster, James mumbled something incoherent and made as graceful an exit as possible.
* * *
Snape shuffled restlessly along the second floor corridor, thoroughly tired of his patrol. He had a good deal of work he planned to do before he went to bed and he was anxious to get to it. Schoolwork was the only escape Snape had these days from the increasingly complicated pressures of other areas in his life; he spent as much time as possible in one of the study rooms these days.
The sound of footsteps echoing in the corridor recalled Snape to his Prefect duties; frowning, he rounded the corner toward the noise and was surprised to come face to face with James Potter coming, apparently, from Dumbledore's office. Immediately, Snape felt all of the hatred and resentment peculiar to James Potter rise to the surface, twisting his face into an ugly leer.
"Snape," James said in surprise, the familiar feelings of loathing and disgust taking over.
"In trouble again, Potter?" Snape sneered, gesturing toward the gargoyle statue with his wand. "Or does the headmaster know you were in his office?"
"Bugger off, Snivellus," James' skin crawled at the eager expression in Snape's eyes, as though getting James in trouble would make his life complete.
"I don't think so, Potter," Snape taunted, keeping his wand trained on James.
"It's none of your business where I go or what I do, you slimy little git," James taunted back. "You see, Snivelly, I'm Head Boy, which means that I outrank you. For the last time, bugger off or it'll be fifty points from Slytherin."
Snape's eyes narrowed dangerously. "I'm making it my business, Potter. If you're abusing your position in any way I'll find out about it. And you have my word that Dumbledore will hear about it and you will be expelled."
"What, like your little friend Bellatrix should have been?" James' hands clenched into fists. "You must be delighted to have the psychotic bitch back. Just between us, how is it that YOU avoided Death Eater charges, Snivelly? Did you and Bellatrix both just happen to sleep with the right people?"
He'd hit some sort of nerve; Snape's already-sallow face grew even paler and his grip on his wand tightened.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Snape ground out through gritted teeth. "But a word of advice, Potter. It would be unwise to toss accusations about when your dear Mudblood girlfriend is already in such a precarious position. Bellatrix wants her dead, and Bellatrix always gets what she wants."
"You'd better make sure that doesn't happen, Snivelly, for your own sake," James'tone was deceptively casual as he brought out his own wand.
The two wizards stood in the corridor for what seemed like an eternity, measuring each other up over the tips of their wands and wondering just how much the other knew.
It was James who broke away first, impatient with Snape's mind games and vague threats. After a moment's hesitation, Snape too lowered his wand, his lip curling venomously.
"I'll leave you to your patrol, Snivellus," James smirked one last time, even though his heart was pounding in his ears.
Snape didn't respond; instead he strode down the corridor in the opposite direction, trying to get a hold of himself before Potter saw just how much he had shaken him.
* * *
When James finally slipped back into Gryffindor Tower, the crowd in the common room was beginning to die down, though Sirius and several others seemed to be going strong. Scanning the room, James spied Lily curled up in an armchair by the fire, reading what appeared to be a letter. Careful not to attract Sirius' attention, James made his way stealthily toward Lily, sneaking up behind her chair and kissing her on the cheek.
Surprised, Lily spun toward him, her dazzling smile causing strange sensations in the pit of James' stomach. "Hi," she said delightedly, but before she could say anything more, James leaned forward and kissed her again, on the lips this time. Lily wrapped her arms round his neck, clinging to him just as tightly as he was clinging to her. It was a good long while before they finally pulled back, out of breath.
"Where did you sneak off to?" Lily asked, making room for James in the armchair.
"To see Dumbledore," James replied, squeezing into the chair and wrapping his arms round Lily.
"What about?" Lily eyed him curiously and just a bit apprehensively.
James related his conversation with Dumbledore to Lily, not leaving anything out. When he finished, he leaned back slightly to get a better look, unsure how she would react.
Lily leaned in and kissed him, then pulled back. "It's unbelievably sweet that you went to get Bellatrix expelled for me," she began, smiling at James warmly as she snuggled closer to him, their limbs tangling together. "But you don't need to worry about her anymore."
"Er, Lily, she tried to kill you in case you've forgotten!" James exclaimed, bewildered.
"But she didn't," Lily shot back.
"She'll try it again," James pointed out, a bit worried by Lily's apparent lack of concern. Next thing she'd be telling him that Bellatrix was just some sort of misunderstood, harmless little darling and was really quite sweet once you got to know her.
"I know she will, James," Lily replied quietly, twirling a lock of hair round her finger. "But I also know now that I can win. She doesn't frighten me anymore"
"Huh?" James was fairly certain that Lily had somehow caught brain fever, or maybe Bellatrix's insanity was contagious.
Carefully, Lily explained to James why she wasn't afraid and how she knew that she could fight Bellatrix and win because she had done it before. Bellatrix had attacked Lily, really and truly attacked her outside of the safety of Hogwarts' walls, and Lily had won. Dragons you had already faced were never as bad as those you hadn't.
"Does that make sense to you?" Lily asked apprehensively when she'd finished.
"Yeah, I guess," James answered, reaching out for a lock of Lily's hair to play with. "But I still worry."
"I really can take care of myself, you know," Lily said as she leaned her head on James' shoulder.
"I know," James twisted Lily's scarlet hair through his fingers. "That doesn't mean I can't help," he pointed out, smirking.
Lily rolled her eyes but snuggled closer in lieu of a retort.
"Get a room, you lot!" Sirius' voice interrupted them suddenly. "Just don't get OUR room," he added after a pause.
"Shut it, Sirius," Lily said without opening her eyes.
"And bugger off while you're at it," James added absentmindedly, still playing with Lily's hair.
"Fine, I can take a hint. Good night," Sirius rejoined suggestively as he made his way up the stairs.
As he drifted off to sleep, James was fleetingly aware that despite the terrible day and odd night he had had, this moment, tangled in an armchair with Lily Evans, was absolutely perfect.
Author's Note:
Ack! I'm really, REALLY sorry it's taken me so long to update! All I can say is I've been incredibly busy lately (bloody homework) and I haven't had time to write.
But I think I can safely say that it won't take me that long again, although updates might be a bit less frequent for a while than they were, as in there may be only one update a week instead of two.
As always, thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and every chapter before that. I love to hear from you.
Gotta go finish yet another paper now, but I'm sorry one more time. Read, enjoy, and review!
Classes at Hogwarts finally resumed on Thursday after the various weather spells throughout the castle began to wear off, and the students went off to them cheerfully enough, their spirits somewhat restored after their impromptu extra holiday courtesy of the Marauders.
Bellatrix remained absent on both Thursday and Friday, which led to school-wide speculation about whether or not she would in fact be returning, and consequently Thursday's and Friday's classes passed by uneventfully for the Gryffindor seventh years.
This extended absence gave James hope that just maybe Bellatrix wouldn't return to Hogwarts for the end of her seventh year. This seemed to be the most frequent theory currently spinning round in the Hogwarts rumor mill, but unlike loads of others, James had no wish to know what it was that was keeping Bellatrix away or where exactly she was. As long as she stayed away from his friends and most especially away from Lily, the psychotic bitch could rot in hell for all James cared.
However, James was in the minority. Most of Hogwarts was avidly curious to know what had happened to its psychotic bitch in residence. All of the other Slytherin seventh years were present and accounted for, even the ones the Gryffindors knew to have been at the Marchbankses'.
When Bellatrix wasn't present for meals on Saturday and Sunday either, James relaxed a bit. It really did seem that Bellatrix wouldn't be returning.
Which was why James was completely unprepared for the sight of Bellatrix sitting at the breakfast table and looking very much like her old self when he glanced at the Slytherin table on Monday morning.
James was so dismayed, in fact, that he simultaneously dropped the pitcher of pumpkin juice he'd been holding and began to choke on his mouthful of bacon.
"What.....is......SHE.....doing.......here?!" James managed as Sirius very obligingly whacked him on the back, the pumpkin juice flooding his lap in rivulets.
"Who?" Lily wanted to know as she dried James' robes with an airy flick of her wand. James gestured toward the Slytherin table and Lily stiffened as she followed his line of sight.
"Oh," Lily said finally in a surprisingly normal voice. Sirius, however, growled low in his throat.
"She won't be here for long if I have anything to do with it," he spat furiously.
"How could Dumbledore let her come back here?" James shook his head in disbelief.
"You can't be surprised by this," Lily spoke matter of factly. "Of course she came back. There's only half of the year left, why wouldn't she?"
"I promise she won't come anywhere near you, Lily," James whispered earnestly, his breath tickling Lily's ear. "I won't let her."
"Thank you," Lily replied, smiling at James. "But I can take care of myself. And I really doubt that Bellatrix is in any shape to be causing herself extra trouble at the moment." With that, she hurried to catch up to Alice, Dorcas, and Morwenna, leaving the Marauders, muttering darkly to each other, to follow her to class.
* * *
Snape had watched the Gryffindor table discreetly all through breakfast, avidly curious to observe their reactions to Bellatrix's presence. He had been unhappily surprised by their restraint; apart from Potter's small mishap, none of them had given Snape any satisfaction. This was highly disappointing, as Snape had been looking forward to watching the Gryffindors' reactions ever since Bellatrix had entered his study room the night before.
For one who prided himself on his ability to predict others' reactions, especially those of his housemates, Snape had been quite surprised to see her standing there. Bellatrix was a shadow of her former self; her eyes were rimmed with purple bruise-like circles and exhaustion was plain in every line of her body, but the maniacal grin was the same as it ever was, and the insanity in her eyes burned a bit brighter.
"Severus, darling," she'd greeted him with more warmth than was her wont. "Have you missed me, pet?"
Snape had eyed her speculatively, refusing to rise to her bait. Seeing her appearance now, he wondered just how badly she'd been hurt and by whom, and what exactly she'd been doing all this time.
"I am relieved to know you are well," he stated a moment later, keeping all inflection deliberately from his voice. "May I inquire as to your whereabouts?"
"You may," Bellatrix taunted him coyly, eyes dancing. She was plainly enjoying her secrets. Snape decided not to pursue it further.
"And the person who did you this injury?" Snape tried a different tact. "Still living?"
Bellatrix's eyes flashed fire. "Yes," she hissed, her hands clenching involuntarily.
Snape was impressed; whoever had bested Bellatrix and lived to tell the tale despite hers and the Dark Lord's best efforts must indeed be a force to be reckoned with.
"Of course," Bellatrix had recovered herself and was now prepared to launch an attack of her own, "had you seen fit to attend our little gathering, you wouldn't have to swallow your pride and ask, now would you, pet?."
Her barb hit home; Snape's eyes flickered for the barest instant, and Bellatrix's smile widened in glee.
"I'm merely inquiring out of courtesy," Snape was pleased with his cool tone and indifferent shrug. "Although," he continued as inspiration struck, "I must confess to some curiosity as regards one matter. Tell me, Bellatrix, why is it that Lily Evans lives? I was under the impression that you would jump at the opportunity to eliminate her under such ideal circumstances, considering how intensely you dislike her."
Bellatrix drew in a sharp gasping breath, and Snape permitted one of his rare smiles to show. It would appear that his hunch had been accurate. So it was Lily Evans who had gotten the best of Bellatrix. How very interesting.
"Don't mention that filthy Mudblood bitch in my presence," Bellatrix hissed in a shaking, intense voice. Her whole body was quivering with rage, and her eyes were more murderous than Snape had ever seen them. It would be the understatement of a lifetime to say that he had struck a nerve.
After a moment, Bellatrix told Snape at least part of what he wanted to know. She had been badly hurt in the Dark Lord's service at the Marchbankses' and had been in hiding with him and Lestrange ever since, recovering from her wounds. She had returned to Hogwarts at his command and out of respect for her parents, who wanted her to complete her schooling. She herself, it seemed to Snape, had very little interest in returning to Hogwarts, but Bellatrix was nothing if not loyal to both the Dark Lord and her family; there was no question of her disregarding their orders.
Then Bellatrix began to speak of the attacks, sharing anecdotes with Snape and clearly reveling in the memories as she recalled them. Snape listened to her accounts impatiently, wishing her gone so that he could process this new information properly. But it was some time before Bellatrix tired of her stories and took herself off to bed.
Alone with his thoughts at last, Snape had leaned back in his chair thoughtfully, considering what Bellatrix's presence would mean for himself and for others.
* * *
James' Monday was proving to be quite stressful. He and his fellow Gryffindors were on edge, waiting for Bellatrix or one of the other Slytherins to make some sort of move, and James, quite determined that she wouldn't come anywhere near Lily, was perhaps the worst of them all. He couldn't shake the image of Lily's pale, bleeding, pain-filled face after her encounter with Bellatrix out of his head, and it made him nearly desperate to keep Bellatrix away from Lily at any and all costs.
The only real incident occurred as the Gryffindors emerged from the Transfiguration corridor and a crowd of Slytherins that included Bellatrix were heading toward it.
Bellatrix's eyes immediately sought Lily's, and Lily didn't try to avoid her gaze; she met it coolly and stared right back, a hard expression on her face.
His heart in his throat, James had immediately jumped in front of Lily, Sirius right behind him, terrified that something would happen to her. Rosier and Avery flanked Bellatrix instantly, the pair of them clearly relishing the thought of a fight. If Professor McGonagall hadn't come along just then, there really was no telling what might have happened.
Thoroughly worn out by dinnertime, James collapsed onto the bench next to Lily. It had only been one day and he was exhausted. There was no way he could live like this; something had to be done or he'd go mad. Without telling anyone, James made up his mind to go and speak to Dumbledore directly after dinner.
* * *
For her part, Lily was really quite shocked by how little Bellatrix's return was upsetting her. Unlike James, who seemed to be nearing total collapse, Lily hadn't believed that Bellatrix would stay away from Hogwarts. It wouldn't make sense to really; she had only half a year left before she was through and school apparently hadn't been curtailing her Death Eater activities before.
But Lily felt that the real reason she wasn't distressed over Bellatrix was because of what had happened between them on New Year's. Bellatrix just wasn't as intimidating now that Lily had faced the dragon, so to speak. Now Lily knew that when it came down to life and death, she could take Bellatrix, and that knowledge was more comforting and heartening than anything else could be. Bellatrix had come for her and Lily had been the one left standing; she couldn't hurt Lily anymore.
Still, Lily didn't intend to go anywhere near Bellatrix; the hatred and madness glittering in her eyes when she and Lily had made eye contact had really been quite alarming. Lily shuddered now recalling it; what caused a person to have that look in her eyes?
Next to her at the Gryffindor table, James was picking half-heartedly at his food and Lily sighed inwardly. James had been this way all day, ever since they had seen Bellatrix at breakfast. Lily's heart tied itself into knots whenever she saw how much he wanted to protect her, and she wished she could explain to James why she wasn't worried anymore, but she wasn't sure that she could construe it in a way that he would understand.
Glancing round for something to distract her from her uncomfortable thoughts, Lily's eyes fell on Alice sitting a couple of seats away from her. When she'd seen Bellatrix this morning, initially Lily's concern had been for Alice. After all, Bellatrix had killed Alice's parents. But Alice, despite her sweet, unassuming appearance and demeanor, was much tougher than she seemed. Ever since the charges against Bellatrix had been dismissed, Alice had known she would most likely have to attend school with her and had been preparing herself. Lily didn't know how she managed it, but Alice was coping; she would be all right because she'd made up her mind to be. In the face of Alice's problems, Lily felt hers were rendered inconsequential.
* * *
A couple of hours after dinner, James mumbled an excuse to Lily and his friends in the common room and, after a quick stop in his dormitory for the Marauder's Map, made his way determinedly toward Dumbledore's office. Obviously Dumbledore was unaware of the situation, otherwise he would never have allowed Bellatrix back into the school. James would set him straight and then this would all be over and Bellatrix would be gone. It was as simple as that; Dumbledore was the wisest, most kind wizard James had ever encountered. He wouldn't knowingly let this happen.
Stopping in front of the gargoyle statue that hid the staircase to Dumbeldore's office, James consulted the map, gave the password ("sugar quill") and before he had considered it, he was on his way up to the office.
Outside the door, James did not hesitate before knocking firmly. "Enter," a familiar voice called from inside the office, and taking a deep breath, James pushed open the door.
In all of the many times James had visited it, Dumbledore's office had never changed. It was always the same friendly, fascinating clutter of objects both mundane and extraordinary, and as always, James had to resist the temptation to wander round exploring all of them.
Behind his enormous desk, Dumbledore stood. "James," he greeted warmly, his eyes full of their customary knowing twinkle. "To what do I owe this honor?"
Now that he was actually facing Dumbledore, James felt a bit awkward and wasn't quite sure how to begin.
"Er - " James managed.
"Why don't you sit down?" Dumbledore gestured to a chair, patient as ever.
Deciding that the only way he could get through this was just to say it, James braced himself and blurted: "Professor Dumbledore, I wanted to talk to you about Bellatrix."
"Ah," Dumbledore steepled his hands on his desk and looked at James keenly over the top of his spectacles. "I see. This had something to do with the tragedy at the Marchbankses,' I take it?"
James quickly told Dumbledore the entire story of Bellatrix's Death Eater escapades at the New Year's ball from her attack on Lily and her confession of killing the Prewetts to her unusual relationship with Vodemort himself.
"She can't stay here, Professor," James finished desperately, "she just can't. Not after what she's done to Lily and Alice and Merlin knows who else. The Ministry won't do anything about her, but you can. She's a Death Eater, Professor, there are witnesses."
James, I know," Dumbledore had been still and silent all the time James had been talking, listening intently. Now he leaned back slightly, a serious expression on his face.
"You - you know what?" James was a bit nonplussed.
"I am aware that Bellatrix Black is a Death Eater," Dumbledore stated calmly, his blue eyes a bit less twinkly now.
"What?!" James felt as though someone had beat a Bludger into his stomach. "But if you know, then why is she still here? Hogwarts is supposed to be safe; if you know, then why isn't that b - Bellatrix - in Azkaban where she belongs?"
Dumbledore sighed, and just for a moment, he looked very old. "It's not quite that simple, James," he explained. "No one can be expelled from Hogwarts without a legitimate reason, and Bellatrix was never charged with being a Death Eater. Without that charge, it is a baseless accusation and is not grounds for expulsion."
James knew what Dumbledore didn't add: Bellatrix's parents held significant power over the school governors; she could practically admit to being a Death Eater and manage not to be chucked out simply because of her influential connections.
"Oh," James got out, trying desperately to hide his disappointment and worry.
"Also," Dumbledore continued, slightly less solemn now, "I have always believed in the old adage about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. And as long as Bellatrix is at Hogwarts, I can prevent her from causing serious harm." Dumbledore's eyes glimmered.
A phrase that Remus said quite often popped into James' head at that moment. "Dumbledore has his reasons." And sitting there in Dumbledore's office, James realized just how true that statement was. It had always used to annoy him whenever Remus said it, but now somehow, it made him feel a bit better about it all.
"I understand, sir," James spoke finally.
Dumbledore merely smiled back at him kindly, and hesitating, James rose to go.
"Was there something else on your mind, James?" Dumbledore asked mildly. Impulsively, James spun round.
"Could I just ask you something, Professor?" James took a deep breath. "Why did you make me Head Boy?" he blurted before he could decide not to.
"There are many reasons, James," Dumbledore seemed to be amused by the question.
"What I mean is - " James struggled to explain. "I'm not exactly a model student. Why didn't you make Remus or somebody else who's responsible Head Boy? I reckon they would have deserved it more."
"No one deserves to be Head Boy more than you do, James," Dumbledore replied quietly. "I have always felt that you possessed the potential to be a leader, and during this past year you have realized that potential admirably. I was very impressed by your actions during the Whomping Willow incident with Sirius and Severus Snape; you proved yourself capable of great things."
Dumbledore paused as Fawkes his phoenix came to perch on the desk. James watched the bird, dazed; he'd had no idea that Dumbledore thought so highly of him. He glanced round to find Dumbledore watching him with a knowing twinkle in his eye.
"And of course," Dumbledore continued, his eyes dancing, "In dark times such as these, we could all use some laughter in our lives, and there's never a dull moment with you and Mr. Black around."
James grinned at that, slightly embarrassed by all the trouble he had caused the headmaster over the years, including his recent foray into meteorology.
"Thanks for telling me, sir," James said as he turned to go once again, a hellion grin still tugging at his lips. "And - thanks for telling me about the other thing too."
"You're quite welcome, James," Dumbledore answered comfortably, returning James' smile. "I hope I've helped to put your mind at ease."
"Yeah, sort of," James ran a hand through his hair distractedly.
"Miss Evans is very fortunate to have someone like you care so much for her," Dumbledore added. Not all sure how to respond to that or if he was exactly ready to discuss his feelings for his girlfriend with the headmaster, James mumbled something incoherent and made as graceful an exit as possible.
* * *
Snape shuffled restlessly along the second floor corridor, thoroughly tired of his patrol. He had a good deal of work he planned to do before he went to bed and he was anxious to get to it. Schoolwork was the only escape Snape had these days from the increasingly complicated pressures of other areas in his life; he spent as much time as possible in one of the study rooms these days.
The sound of footsteps echoing in the corridor recalled Snape to his Prefect duties; frowning, he rounded the corner toward the noise and was surprised to come face to face with James Potter coming, apparently, from Dumbledore's office. Immediately, Snape felt all of the hatred and resentment peculiar to James Potter rise to the surface, twisting his face into an ugly leer.
"Snape," James said in surprise, the familiar feelings of loathing and disgust taking over.
"In trouble again, Potter?" Snape sneered, gesturing toward the gargoyle statue with his wand. "Or does the headmaster know you were in his office?"
"Bugger off, Snivellus," James' skin crawled at the eager expression in Snape's eyes, as though getting James in trouble would make his life complete.
"I don't think so, Potter," Snape taunted, keeping his wand trained on James.
"It's none of your business where I go or what I do, you slimy little git," James taunted back. "You see, Snivelly, I'm Head Boy, which means that I outrank you. For the last time, bugger off or it'll be fifty points from Slytherin."
Snape's eyes narrowed dangerously. "I'm making it my business, Potter. If you're abusing your position in any way I'll find out about it. And you have my word that Dumbledore will hear about it and you will be expelled."
"What, like your little friend Bellatrix should have been?" James' hands clenched into fists. "You must be delighted to have the psychotic bitch back. Just between us, how is it that YOU avoided Death Eater charges, Snivelly? Did you and Bellatrix both just happen to sleep with the right people?"
He'd hit some sort of nerve; Snape's already-sallow face grew even paler and his grip on his wand tightened.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Snape ground out through gritted teeth. "But a word of advice, Potter. It would be unwise to toss accusations about when your dear Mudblood girlfriend is already in such a precarious position. Bellatrix wants her dead, and Bellatrix always gets what she wants."
"You'd better make sure that doesn't happen, Snivelly, for your own sake," James'tone was deceptively casual as he brought out his own wand.
The two wizards stood in the corridor for what seemed like an eternity, measuring each other up over the tips of their wands and wondering just how much the other knew.
It was James who broke away first, impatient with Snape's mind games and vague threats. After a moment's hesitation, Snape too lowered his wand, his lip curling venomously.
"I'll leave you to your patrol, Snivellus," James smirked one last time, even though his heart was pounding in his ears.
Snape didn't respond; instead he strode down the corridor in the opposite direction, trying to get a hold of himself before Potter saw just how much he had shaken him.
* * *
When James finally slipped back into Gryffindor Tower, the crowd in the common room was beginning to die down, though Sirius and several others seemed to be going strong. Scanning the room, James spied Lily curled up in an armchair by the fire, reading what appeared to be a letter. Careful not to attract Sirius' attention, James made his way stealthily toward Lily, sneaking up behind her chair and kissing her on the cheek.
Surprised, Lily spun toward him, her dazzling smile causing strange sensations in the pit of James' stomach. "Hi," she said delightedly, but before she could say anything more, James leaned forward and kissed her again, on the lips this time. Lily wrapped her arms round his neck, clinging to him just as tightly as he was clinging to her. It was a good long while before they finally pulled back, out of breath.
"Where did you sneak off to?" Lily asked, making room for James in the armchair.
"To see Dumbledore," James replied, squeezing into the chair and wrapping his arms round Lily.
"What about?" Lily eyed him curiously and just a bit apprehensively.
James related his conversation with Dumbledore to Lily, not leaving anything out. When he finished, he leaned back slightly to get a better look, unsure how she would react.
Lily leaned in and kissed him, then pulled back. "It's unbelievably sweet that you went to get Bellatrix expelled for me," she began, smiling at James warmly as she snuggled closer to him, their limbs tangling together. "But you don't need to worry about her anymore."
"Er, Lily, she tried to kill you in case you've forgotten!" James exclaimed, bewildered.
"But she didn't," Lily shot back.
"She'll try it again," James pointed out, a bit worried by Lily's apparent lack of concern. Next thing she'd be telling him that Bellatrix was just some sort of misunderstood, harmless little darling and was really quite sweet once you got to know her.
"I know she will, James," Lily replied quietly, twirling a lock of hair round her finger. "But I also know now that I can win. She doesn't frighten me anymore"
"Huh?" James was fairly certain that Lily had somehow caught brain fever, or maybe Bellatrix's insanity was contagious.
Carefully, Lily explained to James why she wasn't afraid and how she knew that she could fight Bellatrix and win because she had done it before. Bellatrix had attacked Lily, really and truly attacked her outside of the safety of Hogwarts' walls, and Lily had won. Dragons you had already faced were never as bad as those you hadn't.
"Does that make sense to you?" Lily asked apprehensively when she'd finished.
"Yeah, I guess," James answered, reaching out for a lock of Lily's hair to play with. "But I still worry."
"I really can take care of myself, you know," Lily said as she leaned her head on James' shoulder.
"I know," James twisted Lily's scarlet hair through his fingers. "That doesn't mean I can't help," he pointed out, smirking.
Lily rolled her eyes but snuggled closer in lieu of a retort.
"Get a room, you lot!" Sirius' voice interrupted them suddenly. "Just don't get OUR room," he added after a pause.
"Shut it, Sirius," Lily said without opening her eyes.
"And bugger off while you're at it," James added absentmindedly, still playing with Lily's hair.
"Fine, I can take a hint. Good night," Sirius rejoined suggestively as he made his way up the stairs.
As he drifted off to sleep, James was fleetingly aware that despite the terrible day and odd night he had had, this moment, tangled in an armchair with Lily Evans, was absolutely perfect.
Author's Note:
Ack! I'm really, REALLY sorry it's taken me so long to update! All I can say is I've been incredibly busy lately (bloody homework) and I haven't had time to write.
But I think I can safely say that it won't take me that long again, although updates might be a bit less frequent for a while than they were, as in there may be only one update a week instead of two.
As always, thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and every chapter before that. I love to hear from you.
Gotta go finish yet another paper now, but I'm sorry one more time. Read, enjoy, and review!