Disclaimer: InuYasha is written by Rumiko Takahashi. I do not own anything mentioned in this fanfic besides the idea of the fanfic.

To Love A Human

Chapter Five

Time seemed to slow to a nerve-wrecking crawl as Sesshoumaru waited in the darkness. The night was dragging on as if reluctant to give itself up to the morning, and Sesshoumaru sat, tight-lipped, almost wishing that the turning of the days followed his orders.

There were so many questions buzzing in his head. Some couldn't be answered yet, and some could be answered as soon as it became day. Day was when humans roused; day was when they became active once again, and if they didn't, that would only mean something was wrong. Not that he had a doubt that something was already wrong with Rin… or did he?

In truth, Sesshoumaru was hoping that somehow, someway, his contact with Rin was just a misunderstanding on his part, that the burning surface he had touched was just temporary, or perhaps an illusion — that Rin was all right.

For that reason, he would need confirmation. If Rin was fine by morning, it would mean that it was just a passing phase, and that there was nothing to concern himself over.

However the other side of Sesshoumaru that wasn't in denial knew that he should be doing something already before her condition worsened. He should probably be taking her to where she could receive proper help — back to her kind. Unlike humans, youkai were not subject to illnesses of any sort. He wouldn't know the first thing there was about how to treat a simple thing like a cough or a cold. It never affected him, and thus he didn't see the need to look into this extra weakness of humans. But there was a need to now.

Rin had never fallen seriously ill before throughout the whole time she was with him. As he always avoided villages unless it was absolutely necessary, Rin wasn't exposed to diseases. And whenever Sesshoumaru had to go to places where he knew it was dangerous for a human, he would leave her behind so as not to put her at risk. Therefore, Rin had always been in good health for as long as Sesshoumaru could remember.

He looked down at her sleeping form beside him and felt another pang of guilt. Rin would never tell him if anything was wrong, be it if she was injured or if she wasn't feeling well. She would always hide it behind a seemingly cheerful demeanour. Perhaps if he hadn't been so caught up with himself, he could have sensed that something was amidst earlier on and prevented her condition from deteriorating to such a level. The fact that she was probably already ill and yet still let him push her until she passed out kept biting at his conscience.

For the first time in his life, he regretted that his pride had stood in his way many times, making him act in an inconsiderate and heartless manner.

Sesshoumaru had initially thought of waking Rin, just to see if she was fine, and also to get rid of his guilty conscience. It was a new feeling to him — guilt, and he sure as hell didn't like it at all.

On the other hand, he knew that she needed to rest, and nighttime was reserved for humans to do so, especially if she was sick. He didn't want to wake her unnecessarily, lest it really did turn out to be just a misinterpretation of his senses.

He laughed inwardly, the action tinged with bitterness at that. Unbeknownst to her, Rin had just unwittingly thrown him into yet another dilemma. She really seemed to be generating a habit of doing that. If he woke her now and took her to a village where she could receive treatment as fast as possible, he might be preventing more damage to her body. However if he woke her and took her to a village only to find that there was nothing wrong, he would be exhausting her further.

The tug-of-war went on in his mind, until he finally decided to take the seemingly easy way out and wait till daytime to see if she was really ill. The only setback was that time seemed to be passing excruciatingly slowly now as he waited for the sun to rise.

Restlessness was stirring in his blood as Sesshoumaru turned his head away from Rin and stared straight ahead at the opposite wall of the cave. He frowned and stood up, deciding to make better use of the ample time. The longer he stayed beside Rin, the stronger he felt the temptation to shake her awake and demand that she tell him she was all right.

Anxiety was not something Sesshoumaru was accustomed to either.

When he stepped out of the cave and into the open, Sesshoumaru inhaled the damp air of the early morning, checking again for any foreign youkai scent. He would need to be on guard once more, now that he had chosen to leave Rin's side. Thankfully, there was none he could detect.

Walking away from the cave in a bid to dispense with his growing restiveness, he thought of an idea. He could use this time to find some food for Rin, so that she wouldn't need to waste time and energy looking for some when she woke up.

He was hesitant to carry out this task though, as he had never done such favours before for anyone, much less for a human. He was more inclined to make Jaken do the work for him, if any.

If Rin needed new clothing, he would send her to a village with Jaken. If Rin needed to eat or rest, he would stop their journey. But never in all this time did he attend to her needs directly. If Rin needed new clothing, he didn't go into the village to get it for her, and if it was food, he didn't go out to fetch it for her. If it was rest she required, he didn't lay out a futon for her. There had always been a certain limit to what he allowed himself to do in accordance to her human needs. To do something so directly for her would suggest a personal bond, or imply that she held equal status. He couldn't allow that. And yet, as he stood there under the moonlight, fully aware of his self-implemented restrictions, he felt the familiar and insistent urge to do it for her.

For Rin.

She wasn't just any normal human being. She was the only being who was able to worm her way into his stone-cold heart somehow. Sesshoumaru didn't care about humans in general. He had killed so many on occasion for the tiniest reasons. Their lives didn't matter.

Rin's does.

He thought about how he would react if she got hurt. He definitely didn't like the idea, he thought, frowning. His thoughts then shifted to how he would react if she got hurt because of him.

Just thinking about it was unbearable.

Without further hesitation, he walked into the forest, his mind set on finding something of edible nature for Rin. He knew that if he let himself deliberate more on the situation, his pride would surely step in and override everything else — like it always did.

Sunlight was streaming into the cave when Rin finally roused from her peaceful slumber. She yawned and stretched, but she didn't feel refreshed at all. Usually she would after a full night's rest. Instead, her head was still heavy and her breath was hot. Her body felt sore and she was generally feeling lethargic.

Disappointed that she wasn't feeling any better than yesterday, she dropped her gaze to the cave floor. And then, she noticed it.

Spread out before her was a huge leaf, and on it was a pile of mushrooms. Rin blinked in disbelief, trying to place her finger on a scene familiar to this one. She had seen it before somewhere for sure, she thought.

She finally remembered.

When she had first met Sesshoumaru, back when he was too injured to move, she had offered him food in the same manner; spread out on a big leaf.

Could Sesshoumaru-sama have done this… for me? Rin thought to herself in honest surprise at the unusual gesture of kindness. It seemed highly unlikely that Sesshoumaru would have done such a thing, and so Rin chided herself for her impulsive assumption.

Maybe Jaken-sama did it for me. She glanced around and immediately caught sight of Jaken — still in dreamland. His snoring gave him away actually, but Rin just wanted to make sure.

Ah-Un… perhaps? She tried to think of all the other options since she was almost certain that Sesshoumaru would never do such a thing for her. However it was also impossible for Ah-Un to perform such a task, unless he had set the leaf down first, then gone back and forth collecting the mushrooms. Besides, the two-headed dragon was still fast asleep nearby.

Rin blushed with realisation of the obvious. She looked down again at the simple but meaningful serving of food before her, and felt her heart start to flutter like the night before. She should thank him, Rin thought to herself as she struggled to stand. But where is Sesshoumaru-sama?

She looked around her, scanning every nook and corner of the cavern as well as she could, but it was apparent that the white-haired youkai lord was not there. Her heart sank. Had he gone without her again? Rin felt a stab of pain at the thought.

Kneeling next to Jaken, she tried to gently shake him awake. "Jaken-sama, please wake up," she said to him, hoping her words did not fall on deaf ears. To her relief, they didn't. Jaken made a tiny snort then blinked a couple of times before he was fully awake.

He sat up and turned to face her. "Ah, ohayo Rin." [ohayo: good morning]

"Ohayo, Jaken-sama," Rin greeted in reply, then added with a look of concern on her face, "where did Sesshoumaru-sama go?"

"Sesshoumaru-sama? Hmm… I don't recall him saying anything about leaving."

"You mean, Sesshoumaru-sama didn't tell Jaken-sama where he went?"

"Iie," Jaken said. "Is there something wrong, Rin?" [iie: no]

Rin shook her head but said dolefully, "Rin just wants to thank Sesshoumaru-sama for the food and for staying with her last night."

"Areh? Food?" [areh: sound of surprise/bewilderment]

"Hai, over there," Rin pointed while getting up. Perhaps he was outside waiting for them, she thought hopefully as she hurriedly made her way out of the cave, leaving behind a very much astonished Jaken staring in disbelief as the little mound of mushrooms, his mouth wide open.

Once she was out of the cave, Rin had to squint in order to see under the bright sunlight. Her effort paid off nonetheless, as she made out the form of a man with long flowing hair some distance away, walking back towards the cave.

"Sesshoumaru-sama!" she called out happily, running forward to greet him. Wherever it was that he had gone, he had returned in time when she woke up. The thought sent her spirits soaring again.

He stopped walking and stared at her. Rin too, stopped when he did, leaving a significant gap between them. She watched him, as he watched her, an uncomfortable silence building up between them.

"Okaeri nasai, Sesshoumaru-sama," Rin finally managed to say, giving him a whole-hearted smile. There was something different about the way he was looking at her, and Rin was feeling increasingly uneasy. She felt as though he was scrutinising her from head to toe. [okaeri nasai: welcome back]

She dropped her gaze to the ground when he still didn't respond. She could never look directly into his piercing amber eyes for long. It felt wrong to after a certain period of time, as if she was challenging him in a way, and she definitely didn't mean to. She would give up and obey him all the time.

"Anou…" she began, attempting to break through the strange and hanging silence in the air. She was suddenly feeling very shy, and the shyness increased in intensity with each passing moment he stared at her with his usual impassive expression, not giving away any clue as to why he was looking at her that way. [anou: um/uh/er]

"Anou," she tried again, shifting her feet slightly as she remembered what it was she wanted to tell him. With her eyes still glued to the ground and her heart pounding within her chest, she said humbly, "Arigatou… Sesshoumaru-sama." [arigatou: thank you]

Just when she wasn't expecting him to reply, he spoke. "Have you eaten?"

Rin lifted her head to look at him when she answered with a smile, "Not yet." He wasn't staring at her anymore, but had continued walking instead. Rin waited until he had walked past her, then turned around to follow him in her usual cheerful manner.

She followed him until they reached the cave entrance where he stopped and angled his head slightly back to her. "Rin, eat quickly and freshen yourself up at the stream. We're leaving after that."

"Hai!" Rin replied happily, going back into the cave with her eagerness to please Sesshoumaru.

Even though she wasn't exactly hungry, Rin ate all the mushrooms he brought for her; save for the ones she offered Jaken and Ah-Un. She was so delighted and in high spirits that she almost felt like her 'genki' self. Wasting no time after she finished, Rin headed down to the stream to wash her hands and face. Her skin felt strangely warm to the touch, but she didn't think too much about it. After all, it could be because of the excitement she was feeling about Sesshoumaru. [genki: healthy; energetic]

Sesshoumaru-sama, she thought to herself with a smile. How she loved just being around him. She was happy just being able to follow him wherever he went. He didn't need to speak to her or to show her affection in the way her family used to. She was happy just to be with him, which would explain why his extra and unusual gesture of kindness this morning and the way he listened to her the night before was making her so elated.

Rin ran back to the cave, not wanting to let Sesshoumaru wait unnecessarily for her. They were all set and ready to leave, with Jaken holding the reins of Ah-Un and trying to carry what appeared to be a one-sided conversation with Sesshoumaru.

"I'm back!" Rin announced, slightly panting after her run.

"Rin!" said Jaken in his typical tone of rebuke. "Don't take so long to get ready next time. You made Sesshoumaru-sama wait again!"

"Hai," Rin said ruefully, before turning to Sesshoumaru. "Rin is sorry for making you wait. Please forgive Rin."

Sesshoumaru merely gave her a side-glance and said coolly, "You will ride on Ah-Un today. Don't walk." With that, he started out front while Rin immediately went to saddle Ah-Un.

A short moment later, Jaken interrupted the silence in the procession by asking, "Sesshoumaru-sama, where are we going today?"

No answer.

"Anou… Sesshoumaru-sama?"

And still no response.

Jaken eventually gave up, but Rin was curious to know where they were heading to in such a hurry as well. Sesshoumaru almost never told her to do anything quickly. She decided to try her luck.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, where are we going?"

There was a pause, filled with just the sound of footsteps and the pounding of earth as Ah-Un walked, when Sesshoumaru finally answered, "We are going to a human village."

---------------

Author's Notes: Hmm… I don't really know what to say about this chapter. I don't think I did very well on it.

In response to a review about the Japanese translations… I'm sorry but I'm going to leave it as it is. In my other fanfic, the translations are at the bottom, but my friends complained of having to scroll up and down and getting themselves lost in the process, and they felt it better once I changed it to this. My condolences too, to those who haven't had the chance to appreciate the anime in its original Japanese form. The reason why I keep putting in Japanese is because I can just hear the characters saying those words, but I can't imagine them using pure English to replace them all. For this, I apologise, but I'm going to keep it this way nevertheless.

A big thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter ^_^ chapter four received an astonishing 15 reviews, and I'm very pleased and flattered by your comments! Do continue to give me your much appreciated feedback, and I will try to write up to your expectations as much as possible XD once again, arigatou!