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Thanks to my beta reader Ansku.

Hope you enjoy it!

The final decision

Suddenly Tony looked straight into Jack's face. The words must have caused a reaction in him.

Jack had just put into words what has been the aim of Tony's plan. But the words had never felt so real.

Of course Tony had thought about the different ways how Michelle's life could go on without him so often. And all of his thoughts had included several men. The thought of Michelle getting closer with one of them had driven him crazy but above all it had been what he had wanted:

she should start a new life.

Or had he just pretended to himself that he wanted that? Was it just his ridiculous way of dealing with the situation? Just closing his eyes from what was really going on to ease his mind and not to feel too guilty?

Now he wasn't so sure about his plan anymore.

Had it helped him?

Had it helped her?

Had it helped both or neither of them?

He didn't know.

Now that Jack had told him how Michelle was doing and that he should make a final decision he didn't know if he could let go of her.

When he had decided to tell her off he had thought it was the right thing to do and he never got to know how it really worked but after Michelle had stopped sending letters he thought that his plan had really worked.

And now Jack came around and ruined his foolish illusion of Michelle doing well.

Of course it wasn't true that he didn't love her anymore. He couldn't imagine what he could ever love more than Michelle. His Michelle. His beautiful wife.

On the other hand maybe he should just wait a little longer. Maybe then Michelle would be able to get over him. Maybe it was just too short time.

And if he would now tell her that he doesn't love her, maybe then she would start a new life.

Tony swallowed hard.

Although he had imagined this scene of Michelle starting a new life so often and it had made him go insane it had never been so real and so painful.

Now it was really up to him and Jack was standing there waiting for an answer. An answer Tony didn't have.

He had thought he had already made this decision 5 months ago.

Now he knew he had been wrong.

There was a short moment in which he imagined how good and beautiful it would be to see her again, to tell her how sorry he was, to hear her voice again, to receive letters from her which he would even read.

But he blocked this thought out of his mind immediately. He couldn't be so egoistic. He had to consider what would be best for her and not for him. Even if it wouldn't seem to be good for her at the first moment.

He couldn't let his love to this woman influent his decision.

It was way too important, it would change two life or maybe it already had.

"So, what is it?", Jack asked after he had watched Tony thinking for a few minutes and he still sounded a little too harsh.

But he didn't bother about his voice, because it should make clear to Tony how important this was.

But Tony didn't know what to do.

The only thing he knew was that he loved and adored this woman so much. He wanted to do everything to make her grief go away, but how?

Could he burden her with the life of a traitor's wife?

Or would it be better for her to let her suffer a little longer until she would be able to get over him and find another man?

"I can't wait forever, Tony. It's time", Jack said expecting an answer.

Tony looked to the floor and then into Jack's face.

His look was anxious, he feared to make the wrong decision. The wrong decision for her, or for him, or for both of them.