What could make you think I'd allow this?

I'm sorry about the late chapter. The last one, not this one if you think this is late you are impatient and mean with unreachable standards! LET ME REST! I NEED STUFF TOOO! I am writing this at only ten twenty five at night. I'm going to have to start giving up my nocturnal life style soon. I got a baby-sitting job, eight to three thirty, argh! But I'm going to be making a hundred and twenty bucks a week! Does a happy dance But I digress, what I'm trying to say is, it may take a little longer to post. Thought I'd let you know. Oh and I'm not going to let that one bad review get to me. Just cause some one cant take a joke and decided to read a story clearly marked as a joke to amuse myself and others like me with views on unnecessary romance similar to mine doesn't mean I'll sink so low as to say something nasty about them on the net like… "You're an idiot to read a story that you knew would annoy you. But you read it all the same just to fill time in your sad probably DAZR obsessed life." See I'm not going to do that cause I'm just mature like that. Now on to the story!

A hideous crime against technology!

The grotesque abuse of a cute character!

The room was dark lit only by the computer light and a small bulb above the work desk. Zim turned his head to the side as he inspected the chip. It was a small purple and red microchip with little sliver electronic looking things coming off of it (A/N: my knowledge of computer do-hickies amazes you, no?).

"Gir!" he screamed summoning his henchman for the first time in like this entire story. Off in some dark unknown room of the house a loud cry of glee erupted and grew louder. The door burst open and a small silver robot appeared, "Monkeys!" he screeched and stumbled falling at Zim's feet. Gir giggled. Zim glared down at him, "Gir." He said lifting the robot to its feet, "You're brains are bad. We're going to give you a new one. But this is different than the time I locked you into duty mode and you tried to kill me. You know what? It's stupid of me to try and change you again and risk you going all CRAZY again. Yes I said again, again! And nobody can stop me from saying it. AGAIN!" he began to laugh evilly at the ability destroy the English langue.

Gir's grin disappeared suddenly. Somewhere within the deep caverns of his malfunctioning mind something reached a dangerous heat level and POP! A wire snapped causing his brain to malfunction even more than usual. His face contorted and twitched wildly. His eyes went dark a moment then relit a powerful pink. He grinned at Zim. The alien cocked his head at the strange looking android.

"I…I love you!" Gir proclaimed and threw himself at Zim. His metal lips crushing and bruising Zim's tender meaty ones. Gir closed his eyes but the pink light still showed through. Zim grabbed him and tried to pry the robot off. There was a CLICK, CLICK and two flashes. Overhead Zim heard snickering. He raised his head up, with Gir still smooching his now raw lips, and saw a black clad Dib hanging from over head with a hand over his mouth attempting to stifle a giggle and one clutching a camera.

"Dib!" he said in a muffled way grabbing Gir and tossing him aside. The pink-eyed robot began to cry softly at the rejection he had just received.

Zim glared at Dib but his eyes slowly found their way back to the weeping robot. He was so cute with his now pink glowing eyes and always-innocent mind. So cute… he shook his head. Doom the human, that's what he had to do! Zim's eye twitched back to the robot. But FOCUS, he had to FOCUS!

Dib caught the glance and opened his mouth, which was still covered by his sneaky ninja mask, to make a snide remark when suddenly he began to disappear! It was first a strange discolorization on his fingertips, then they began to become clear, first his hands, then his feet, and legs. The transparency only continued to grow up his body Dib began to panic and screamed, "What the- Zim! WHAT IS…?" he was unable to finish before completely disappearing. Zim glanced around a few times then merely shrugged. Whatever had happened to Dib was not his doing but it sounded painful and pain was good so he didn't really care about the human's fate. Zim touched his bruising purpley green lips tenderly. He was feeling strangely out of character. His red eyes glided across the room over to the still weeping pink eyed Gir.

"Gir…" he said slowly. Gir's eyes rose to meet Zim's who was moving closer and closer and…(A/N:I can't go on writing this evil! How is such idiocy possible? It makes me sad to be in the same species as some of these author meanies! BTW if you think I'm harsh you should hear what my older brother thinks of DAZRers. I wont say it for two reasons one, I want you to keep reviewing me. And two, There are far too many curse words used. But back to the ickiness at hand, I mean Gir is a… and Zim's a…ARGH! IT HURTS TO CONTINUE! But I suppose I shall.) closer still. Zim had dropped to his knees and was crawling toward Gir with his lips pursed. As his lips came within about six inches of Gir's there was a flash of light to the side. Zim turned and saw what was causing it.

A pale hand appeared with a white glow around it. Then another and two black sleeves fallowed by a blue abdomen with a black back. Black knees and legs and feet appeared. Lastly a large head appeared, still screaming in agony from the trip back from wherever he had gone. Dib stayed there on his hands and knees a few moments before shaking his head soon the glow subsided. He raised it and looked at Zim. The two just blinked for another few seconds before Dib stood up and staggered toward the aliens (Gir counts as an alien).

"Where did you come from Stink?" hissed Zim fairly annoyed with Dib reappearing in his base. Dib twitched a little, "I-I came from another plain of existence! Everything was three D and the sky was BLUE! People's heads were smaller than their shoulders! Their shoulders! And so tall…so tall…" Dib rambled on. Zim, without hesitation, reached out and slapped Dib across the face. Dib stood there stunned for a moment with his head still turned to the side from the slap. He rubbed his cheek a little, "Sorry. Okay what I was trying to say was, I met the creator! In his world, it was amazing…"

"You mean God?" asked a wide-eyed Gir.

"No," Dib said shaking his head, "This guy was considerably lower in power than the Almighty Father," Dib did the sign of the cross. (Hee, hee Religion jokes from a Catholic!) then the bigheaded boy continued, "No this was merely OUR creator. I can't remember his name but I did write it down." He dug through his pocket.

"When did you have the opportunity? You were gone thirty seconds." asked an annoyed Zim.

"Eh, time warpy difference between worlds. Anyway here it is, Jonon Vasqueeze." He read mispronouncing Jhonen's name. Zim glared at the human.

"It's pronounced JHONEN VASQUEZ you stupid earth dumb thing!"

"Well that doesn't matter he summoned me to give you a message! And it's on this same piece of paper. He wrote," Dib cleared his throat, "Eh hem, Zim. Stop being hideously gross. Gir is a robot and you are an organic being. I thought I made it clear two or three chapters ago that you are not to know the emotion that is love. It's bad. You've only said the word like four times if that in the span of your entire show. Anyone whose reading this and has actually gone through and counted the number of times Zim has said the word love, well you're just sad aren't you? Back to Zim, stop it or I shall destroy you, if you don't believe me. Just try it. Your seething creator, Jhonen Vasquez." Dib finished by adding the P.S., "Also if you want to fix gir just hit him really hard in the head. I find that's the solution to all your problems with stupidity." Zim glanced around a moment after Dib had finished.(A/N: Ya know here is a good place for me to mention I'm not Jhonen. I don't know what he's like. All I know is that these are my views and I'm putting a face on them by saying Jhonen. There, that's what I think. That comment was just for the evil person who gave me the mildly bad review! Grr!)

"You're right Earth Stink or well Jhonen is right, you are just a messenger thing." He said as though Dib were the lowest of the low being a mere messenger, "I can't believe I actually let my robotic slave…Ew…anyway it shall not happen again!" he growled.

"But…" a small voice whimpered, "We, we had something special! Don't you remember? Remember the cheese? THE CHEESE?" Zim lifted his fist and bopped Gir on the head. His eyes closed for a moment then reopened aqua. He grinned and wobbled out of the room probably in search of a slurppy. Dib looked at Zim awkwardly a moment than began to laugh uncontrollably. He pointed at Zim and laughed loudly making his words indistinguishable. Zim twitched with rage.

"Get out! COMPUTER, CAPTURE THE INTURDER!" he screamed at the top of his lungs. Claws dropped from the ceiling, Dib's laughter had stopped. He ran away but was sadly was caught in seconds and yanked from the room. Seconds later a distant scream could be heard as Dib was propelled from the roof straight up into the sky. Zim laughed until his voice was horse. Then he just stopped a scared look crossed his face.

"That was awful, what horrors can be waiting for Zim in the next chapter?" he asked his eyes darting around the room.

THE END, I GUESS…

Hi.

I just bought the DVD extra thing for Zim and I listened to Mopeness of Doom, which is not what people on the net told me it was. THEY LIED! It was about Dib becoming normal and Zim getting bored and giving up. It was creepy but in the end Dib went back to his old ways and he and Zim happily insulted each other. Shutters Well review give me ideas and do a little dance for my amusement. Go ahead, I'm waiting. Not one more letter will be typed in this story until YOU do a dance. Thanks and give me ideas. LOTS OF IDEAS! Wahahahahah! I am evil and it is nice.