Disclaimer: Nothing from KA belongs to me.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed and keep reviewing. I am considering also doing one from Arthur's POV tell me what you think.

I watchhim

I watch him.

I watch him watching me.

I watch and I see. I see it in his eyes. Love. A love that can never be, a love that must be sacraficed for the good of my country, the good of my people. A love that brings me to the pinacle of joy, then to the very bowels of despair. A love that cannot exist, that will never be allowed, yet a love that will be remembered forever.

The two men in my heart, both so similar, yet so very different.

Arthur is like the earth, solid and stable, dependable, the perfect place to build the foundations of a country. The earth is always there, strong and unyielding.

Lancelot is like the wind, playful and unpredictable. A light breeze that softly caresses your face or a raging tempest strong enough to whip a man off his feet. The wind is neither here nor there it just is.

Arthur is like water. Calm and collected unless disturbed, serene, hidden emotions, the harsh coldness of ice. He is cool and precise...at times so cold

Lancelot is like fire. So angry and full of hate, filled to the brim with raw uncontrolled emotion. He blazed with glory like a pagan god of war. He was exciting and compelling, warm and passionate...tempting..

They are friends, brothers in arms, comrades. How two so different people have become this close I could only but guess, such is their respect for each other that Lancelot will make no move to take me from Arthur, he loves him too much, bears him too much respect.

There are time when all I wish to do is have him take me in his arms and kiss me with wild abandon, have him sweep me off me feet and carry me away to some far off land where the chains of our responsibilites will fall at our feet and we will be free.

Freedom.

Such a inspiring word, for years my people have fought for it, so many hardships and losses have been suffered in the name of it. For all this time we have strived for freedom and stability. Arthur can give them stability, who am I to take it away from them? Our union would unite the peoples of Brition and they would prosper and we would have peace. Arthur will make a good king, he has the gift of inspiring others, of making them want to follow him, he would lead Brition into the future. Why now? Why when we are so close, so close, to achiving our goal of getting our country back do I wish to jeapardise it?

So I will continue to watch him watching me, pretending I don't see what lies in his eyes. I will become queen of Briton and I will have everything I ever wanted. A stable country, a good marrige, peace, my people brought together.

Everything.

Except him.