The Holy Grail and Mount Doom.
They slowly got out of the boat, a little in frightened that islands popped out of nowhere, and castle moved themselves.
"Uh...do you think the grail is in there? Or in the scary volcano?" asked Gimli timidly.
"The castle duh!" exclaimed Pippin.
"This is where my quest ends with you," said Frodo who everyone had basically been ignoring until this point.
"Why!" exclaimed the fellowship, er part of the fellowship.
"Because, that mountain over there is Mount Doom and I have to throw the ring of power into it," replied Frodo as he began to walk toward Mount Doom.
"Good luck Frodo!" everyone yelled, before returning to their quest for the holy grail and some other stuff. They walked up to the gates of the castle and called up to one of the open windows.
"Is anyone there?" asked Arthur.
"Go away you english freaks!" came the Frenchman's voice.
"That dude is freaking everywhere!" exclaimed Legolas.
"Yes, I am. This is my grail, so go away," the Frenchman replied to Legolas, while sticking his tounge out at him.
"We were sent by God! You know, to get the grail, set an example. All that kind of crap. Could you just toss us the grail? asked Arthur. He didn't really have time to argue with this dude.
"Um...let me think...no!" yelled the Frenchman.
"Please, or else your little island will be covered in lava!" retorted Pippin as he made a gesture toward Mount Doom, in which Frodo had safely entered. with the exception of a little attack from Gollum, but other than that he was pretty safe and he had just dropped in the ring of power. The whole island began to shake.
"Crap...Well, you're island is going to be destroyed anyway, so how bout tossing us that grail?" asked Legolas casually.
"Never!" yelled the Frenchman as he cackled evilly. Frodo came running out of Mount Doom at full speed, almost tackeling his former party.
"Hey guys, I destroyed the ring. What did I miss?" he asked a little out of breath.
"Joe Mamma!" exclaimed the Frenchman.
"Why is he back?" asked Frodo, making a rude gesture at the Frenchman in response to his comment.
"I don't know, but Jack, it's time for you to loot, pillage, and burn this castle," said Arthur who didn't care what kind of mission this was, he was ready for some pirate action.
"I can pillage and loot, but I can't exactly burn a castle, also the lava is about to do that," replied Jack as he ran into the castle. A few moments later he came out witht he grail.
"That didn't take long," replied Arthur while smugly looking up at the castle.
"Pirate," Jack replied after shoving the grail into Arthur's arms.
"What the hell are we going to do with our army though?" asked Aragorn who was pointing to the army of Gondor who had just appeared out of nowhere.
"Let's prepare to attack," replied Pippin.
"Attack what?" asked Aragorn giving Pippin a look of "you're stupid, do you know that?"