((Lindsay's. Severus' point of view.))
I've never loved anyone before.
I'd never felt the sweet, sweet pain that one person can inflict on another; that ecstatic, excruciating blend of agony and pleasure, of joy and heartache, of madness and raw, utter clarity. I was on top of the world and I was six feet in the grave, and I didn't know nor care which way was up.
And I suppose I'm a glutton for punishment, because I reveled in it all.
Do you know, I expected her to slap me. For that is what I know - a cold word, a hateful glance, a hand or wand raised against me. It has all been a part of my life from the day I was born. So when she turned to me, her soft cry strangled before it ever left her lips, I fully expected to receive what was coming to me. I saw myself being turned away; told that, once again, I was too late.
But when her fingertips brushed my robes in that tentative, questioning touch… When she took the cup from my hand and raised my fingers to her lips… Oh, God. I felt my heart would stop, that I would collapse there and then and die in rapture, because she had touched me, she had kissed my hand, all of her own volition, without any rash movements or silly talk of checkmates or pomegranate juice. Oh, dear God… My dear, sweet wife; my American native… My Sabine! My Sabine, yes, mine, for I had laid claim to her from the moment I saw her, from that very first day that I called her from her conversation with the students, though I didn't know it at the time. Every moment, every memory, they were all mine! I hoarded them like the jealous serpent I was, and I laid my claim upon her.
I remembered that Hades tricked his lovely queen into eating but five pomegranate seeds, and she was trapped with him forever. Who better to play the role of the lord of darkness than I? But there would be no tricks here - even if I could bear to deceive her, Sabine is far too clever for such games. The simple truth is, I would give her all she wanted. All the darkness, all the light; all the coffee, the books and all the kisses… I would lay down my own life if it was asked of me, and that is not a sacrifice I was ever willing to make for the sake of just one person. If only she would stay with me…
I drew a shuddering breath as she caressed my cheek, for suddenly my lungs would not function properly, and closed my eyes. Only for the briefest of moments - I did not want her to disappear, did not want to wake and find it had all been another damn dream…
Her lips parted and oh, how badly I wanted to taste them, to feel their warm softness against mine, yielding to my touch… I held her hands close against my heart, and brushed the raven black hair out of her eyes with my fingertips… Her hazel eyes! How expressive, how intelligent… She judges herself too harshly, you know; I watch her with her friends. She is blind to her own worth… I can see it, and much more.
She started to cry, then, and I admit that at first I was alarmed, thinking that once again I had done something wrong. But they were tears of joy, and I felt my heart swell in my chest - I swear it, I did! - at the thought that those tears were for me. I brushed them away, stroking her face, and kissed her gently, hoping impossibly to convey all I felt through my contact.
I gathered her against me, holding her close, and oh, but her form felt wonderful in my arms.
"Sabine," I whispered softly, unable to keep the warmth from my voice as I uttered her name. "Can you keep a secret?"
She nodded, and I lowered my lips to her ear.
"I love you."