I'm very sorry if the lay-out is badly messed up. The site and the uploading system wouldn't agree with me...

June/July 1995.

"They're always talking about guard duty."

"Couldn't have been me, could it?"

"Oh, yeah..."

As soon as Dumbledore had approved of the new Head Quarters, Remus and Sirius packed their stuff and moved in. They were soon joined by almost the entire Weasley family.

Arthur and Molly had agreed to help Dumbledore in his fight against Voldemort. As Molly had lost her two brothers, Gideon and Fabian Prewett, to the Death Eaters, she had reason enough to fight the Dark Lord and his followers. Although it was also one of the reasons why Arthur joined, he mainly did it out of principle. He had lost his trust in Fudge quite some time ago, and had decided to join the Order as soon as Bill had contacted him after Voldemort's return, only a month ago.

They had stayed at the Burrow, their home in Ottery St Catchpole, for the first few weeks, but had soon decided that too inconvenient, too far away from London. Molly didn't like having her children so far away from her and leaving them for hours a day, and seeing as the Head Quarters was a big house with many rooms anyway, the matter was soon settled. The Weasleys locked up their house and moved into 12 Grimmauld Place, taking four of their seven children with them.

It any of the children thought it a strange experience to be living in the same house as one of their former professors and a wanted prisoner, they didn't show it. They did give Remus the odd side-glance at first, and he had a feeling that Fred and George kept their wild antics somewhat down, but they soon got used to passing chocolate-paste to him over breakfast. They still cordially called him by his last name, however. Sirius, on the other hand, was just 'Sirius' from the start. Perhaps it was something instinctive, but the three born pranksters found one another in no-time, and Sirius was soon 'passing on his wisdom to the younger generation', much to Molly's dismay.

The only – familiar – Weasley who was missing was a certain pompous ex-Head Boy. Although Remus hadn't had much contact with him when he had been a teacher at Hogwarts, he had taken a liking to him. Sirius claimed that it was just the Prefect in Remus, but it was more than that. Apart from sticking to the rules, Percy had shown some character, he was usually fair, and he was smart, scoring never lower than Exceeds Expectation, and usually Outstanding.

When he inquired after Percy's whereabouts, he was however met with angry reactions. Molly didn't want to talk about it, the twins gritted their teeth, Ginny and Ron were silent too, and only Arthur wanted to give a short explanation, albeit with great reluctance.

Percy, it transpired, hadn't been so pro-Dumbledore as his parents. He had been promoted by Fudge – Junior Assistant to the Minister himself. Although Percy was delighted, his parents had been less so. "We – had an argument," was all that Arthur wanted to say about it, but Remus and Sirius managed to piece it all together with small comments. Arthur had said that Fudge wanted Percy to spy on his family. Percy had, in return, shouted that his father's bad reputation as a Muggle-lover had never done him any good, quite the contrary. He had then packed his bags and left to live in London. They all knew where – Molly had try to talk to him but he had closed the door in her face. The Order had silently agreed never to mention him again, or, as Sirius had put it when there had been no Weasley around: "he is now He Who We Never Talk About".

To make the invasion complete, Molly and Arthur's other two sons, whom Remus had never met, occasionally visited Grimmauld Place too. Charlie had been there only twice before going back to Rumania again. Although he was build stocky, like the twins, he had nothing of their character: he was laid-back, calm and reliable. The kind of person Remus liked. His elder brother, Bill, was more a Sirius-person. In fact, the first time they met him, Remus had had to laugh at how 'Sirius' Bill was – he even had the dragon-skin boots and the ponytail. It seemed only natural that they were drawn towards one another, those times that Bill was at Grimmauld Place. He didn't always have time – he apparently had a girlfriend, or so Fred and George couldn't stop insinuating.

Making the group of 'youngsters' almost complete, was Hermione, who had asked and been given permission to spend her summer with the Weasleys. She spent most of her days with the other children, which was a good thing, according to Sirius, because "she's like a little female you, Moony."

Remus huffed at that. "Don't be ridiculous. She's hardly anything like me."

"Except that she always has some book near her and she's a know-it-all."

"Which I'm not."

"Keep thinking that, Moony, if it gives you comfort."

The only person who'd make their party complete, was Harry. Sirius in particular missed him. The Weasleys were nice substitutes and occasionally a good laugh, but Harry was his Godson and he had been asked to look after him by James. He had messed up so badly already, he thought, he wanted Harry near him to try and make up for it.

"We can't keep him in that backward part of the country they call Surrey," he had argued one Order-meeting. "I know he needs that protection from – from his mother's family, but he's been stuck there for weeks now. He's be better off here."

Dumbledore had not given in. "I still maintain that Harry should remain at Privet Drive," he had said. "The protection he is now under is the most secure there is. There is no chance that he will be found."

"Then why does everybody have to do bloody guard duty if Harry is so safe?" Sirius had sneered – but to Remus, not to Dumbledore. Remus had warned Sirius that he liked to stay out of this argument, resulting in Sirius being angry for the rest of the evening and Remus feeling guilty for causing it.

Life at Grimmauld Place had been fairly quiet for about a month. Monster turned quite wild in the huge house. He had taken to exploring, disappearing for hours and sometimes days on end, but always turning up again to demand food. Apart from the occasional worry about that, June had turned into July without anything interesting happening. Much to everybody's relief, Voldemort seemed to have decided to keep his head low for the time being. So far, Remus' days had been filled with helping cleaning up, guard duty, meetings with the Order and entertaining Sirius. There were compensations, however: whenever he had a few minutes free time, he sneaked away to the library. It was a treasure cave with ancient books and booby-traps. Remus loved it.

It was the last day of July when he tried to get to the library again. He had a few hours off before Apparating to Surrey, it was his turn tonight, but he figured he was allowed a few hours among books. He had nearly reached the doors to the library when he was interrupted by Sirius.

"So it's guard duty for you tonight?" Sirius stood on the last few steps of the stairs, leaning against the wall. He seemed casual, but Remus could read his friend like no other and saw that Sirius was far from relaxed.

"Yes," he said. "Thought I might as well look through a few more shelves." He nodded towards the library. His official excuse for spending so much time there was that he wanted to check the books for jinxes and other nasty stuff.

"Remus," Sirius said urgently, immediately coming to the point, "let me come to Surrey with you tonight. As Padfoot."

"You can't," Remus said immediately. "Dumbledore – "

"Won't have to know!" Sirius snapped. The mention of the Headmaster had been the wrong thing to do, and he suddenly turned from just tense to angry. "He's being too fucking careful! It's Harry's birthday for Christ's sake! I don't have to talk to him or anything, I just want to see him!

"I know you do," Remus tried to shush. "But you're not to leave the house. We don't know who knows you're Padfoot – yet," he added. "You running around London a few weeks back was dangerous enough as it was. Snape hinted as much."

"Snape?!" Sirius mouthed, too angry to say anything. If mentioning Dumbledore was wrong, talking about Snape was punishable by death. "You just want me stuck in this house, don't you, Remus? Finally, Sirius is locked away, so he can't do anything stupid!"

"That's not true –," Remus tried to cut in.

"And of course it's all too convenient," Sirius stormed on. "Nice big house, it's his own anyway, and since everybody's looking for him anyway it's only reasonable to keep him inside! And meanwhile everybody else can just get out whenever they want, doing their job for the Order, being useful – even bloody Snape – while I'm stuck here!" He had yelled those last words.

Remus opened his mouth, but before he could speak –

"Is Master alright?" a deep, maliciously entertained voice spoke from somewhere. Kreacher appeared on the stairs, a few steps lower than Sirius. He looked up at his master with an utterly unconvincing look of submission.

"Sod off, Kreacher!" Sirius bellowed. He stomped down the stairs and threatened to throw Kreacher down.

"Master can do as Master pleases," Kreacher lisped. He added something inaudibly in an undertone, but it was no doubt something rude.

"No, Master cannot," Sirius said bitterly. He glared at Remus, then looked back at Kreacher. "Get out of my sight. Go do something useful." He threatened Kreacher with his boot again, but the house-elf was gone before he could hit him.

"I'll go do something useful, too, shan't I?" Sirius asked sarcastically of Remus. "Not that it will be anything exciting or remotely interesting..." He walked down the stairs, not trying to move quietly. A few minutes later, Remus could hear Mrs Black start shouting again.

He rubbed his forehead. Sometimes, dealing with Sirius was like dealing with an obstinate child. It simply seemed impossible to make him see sense, no matter how hard he tried. He shook his head. It would be impossible to talk some sense into Sirius at the moment anyway. He turned around and opened the doors to the library.

The large room was much like how Remus had first seen it, a few weeks ago. Kreacher had only half-heartedly dusted a few shelves after Sirius had ordered him to do so, and Mrs Weasley hadn't reached this part of the house yet, she was still busy with more important rooms such as bedrooms and the kitchen. Not that Remus cared; he thought an old, dusty library had its own kind of charm.

He walked to the shelf he had last been examining and picked up a book. It was leather-bound like all the books in the library, and had two snakes coiling along the edges. In the middle it showed a picture of a dragon, and the title: Historica Serpentium et Draconum, by one Odysseus Aldrovodus. The book looked practically ancient: the leather was stained and the pages were yellow. He opened it expectantly.

"Is Sirius alright?"

Remus jumped at least a foot in the air. He turned sharply around.

Hermione's bushy head poked around the corner of one of the comfy chairs near the fireplace. She was looking at him curiously, and Remus could just see the corner of a large book on her lap.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, unable to keep a slightly sharp tone from his voice.

"I don't like cleaning as much as Mrs Weasley does," she said. "So I'm skiving off. Please don't tell anyone."

Remus thought it better not to admit he was doing the exact same thing.

"It Sirius alright?" Hermione repeated.

"Yes, he's fine," Remus lied. "Hermione, I think you'd better go downstairs. I don't think this is...a library you'd like."

"Or who'd like me," Hermione said dryly. "I was only able to take this book, the rest seemed stuck. I think they're charmed for... people like me. This one was the only one he'd let me read." She showed Remus the book: Malleus Maleficarum, it said on the cover.

"Fascinating read," she commented. She put it back on the shelf and walked to the door. Before she opened it, however, she turned around again.

"Professor, may I ask something? About Sirius?"

Remus eyed her carefully. "Yes," he said. "But I can't promise you an answer."

She leaned against the door, her hands folded behind her back. The schoolgirl pose was a strange contrast to the casual jeans and shirt she was wearing and the fly-away hair she didn't seem bothered to tame.

"I don't know if you know," she began, "but last spring, when Sirius was, you know, hiding in a cave near Hogwarts, Harry and Ron and I visited him – "

"Yes, Sirius told me," Remus said.

"Well," Hermione continued, relieved that she could skip a great deal of explaining. "We came to talk about Mr Crouch and his house-elf, and then Sirius said something I had to think of a lot the last few days."

"And what's that?"

"He said that, if you want to take a good measure of someone, you have to look at how he treats his inferiors and not his equals." Hermione hesitated.

Remus could already see where she was going, but he decided to let her say it.

"It's just that..." She seemed to make an effort to word it all very carefully. "He just doesn't seem to follow his own advice."

Remus had suddenly difficulty fighting back a smile, but then he berated himself. After all, she didn't know Sirius half as well as he did. She didn't know how unlikely it was for Sirius to follow his own advice, especially a genuinely good one like that. Sirius knew what was right, but he had a hard time acting it, remembering to do it instead of giving in to the easy way.

"I can understand that Sirius's had a hard time," Hermione continued passionately, unaware of Remus's thoughts, "but it's just not fair. It's not like Kreacher can do anything against his mistreatment. And Sirius genuinely seems to enjoy it. And then he tells us to judge people by how they treat their inferiors? It doesn't make sense, does it?" She frowned at Remus.

"Just promise me one thing," he said, smiling a little. "Whatever you do, don't repeat that speech to Sirius." When he saw that Hermione wanted to protest, he quickly added: "you're right, I agree. Sirius's treatment of Kreacher is not... good. And it doesn't match with what he told you. But I'd advice you not to tell him. Very few people like having their own words thrown back at them, and Sirius likes it least of all." He gave a weak smile. "I learned that from experience."

There was a moment of silence. Then Hermione said: "but really, how can he say such a thing if he doesn't live up to it?"

Remus sighed. "Hermione, Sirius is one of those persons who knows best but doesn't do it. For God's sake don't tell anybody I said this, but Sirius has a tendency to forget to think. He knows what would be the best thing to do, he does. And I believe he really stood behind what he said to you, then. But... well, let's be honest. He hates Kreacher. He hates him and everything he stands for; the house, the family, the life. He can't go kicking the house nor his family, but he can take his anger out on Kreacher, who doesn't have the power to do anything back. And that anger made him forget what he said a few months ago."

Hermione still looked disdainful.

"And it's a habit, I suppose," Remus continued. "When he was a child, Sirius had been learned to treat Kreacher like almost less than a servant, more like an object that does what you want him to do."

"It's all because of the accepted abuse of house-elves," Hermione burst. "They have been treated like dirt for centuries and they can't even do anything back!"

"Not all elves are treated like that," Remus said.

"No, but most are! They need to realise that they can stand up for themselves!"

"That would go against their nature, I think," Remus replied, frowning.

"There's a house-elf at Hogwarts who doesn't think so," Hermione objected.

"Then he's an odd one, like there are odd ones everywhere."

"And what Sirius is doing to Kreacher is normal?"

"No, you're now twisting my words around. Abusing someone who is, as some would have it, inferior to you, is not normal – even though you hate that person," he added. "It may be accepted... among certain society, but that doesn't make it right. On the other hand, you cannot force a house-elf to liberate itself either. Serving is in their blood, their species. They're made to serve, if you will. No matter how violently Kreacher dislikes Sirius, he must do as Sirius tells him, he cannot not do it. As you may have heard, a house-elf that hasn't done its duty or doesn't keep his master's secrets must punish himself. It's the result of generations. It's their nature, and you can't change that overnight. Even if you really want to."

"That's what people keep telling me," Hermione said hotly. "But Dobby – "

"Hermione!" Remus said, almost laughing at her stubbornness. "Have you not yet learned one case isn't an example for the entire group? If that would be the case, what would you have thought if you had met Kreacher before this... Dobby?" This shut her up. She even had the dignity to blush.

"And before you go on an anti-house-elf abuse crusade," he continued, "try to look and judge objectively whether the 'poor little house-elves' really want freedom. Try to judge the person and not the stereotype. You're too smart to do that, I know you are."

Hermione opened her mouth, closed it again, seemed to think something over, paused again, then said: "err..."

Remus waited patiently.

"Can I come back on that?" she asked.

"Certainly," Remus said courteously. He checked his watch. "But not right now, I need to go." He looked at her and grinned. "Homework: a blistering retort to my comments."

She grinned too. "Certainly, sir. How many rolls of parchment would you like?"

Privet Drive, Little Winging, Surrey.

The setting sun shone her orange rays on the street. The grass in the gardens was yellow and the flowers looked rather pathetic: it had been very warm the past few weeks, and people had been ordered to cut down on their water-usage. Despite it being already halfway through the evening, it was still very warm, and most people stayed indoors with their air-conditioning, fans and iced drinks.

Remus was wishing he could get something with ice too. He was sitting on the kerb stone in front of number five, Privet Drive, keeping an eye on number four, on the opposite side of the street. Although there was nobody in sight, he was wrapped in Moody's Invisibility Cloak so that he wouldn't be noticed. Arabella Figg had offered to bring him something to drink, but he had declined. Now he regretted that decision.

It wasn't exactly as if guard duty was so exciting either. The Dursleys turned out to be very dull people. Mr and Mrs Dursley usually kept to the house. Their son, Dudley, went out with his friends almost every evening, but kept to the neighbourhood. And as for the person Remus was supposed to pay attention to, Harry, he stayed indoors for most of the day too, only coming out around sunset to walk a few blocks round. Always the same round, too. Harry didn't seem to feel particularly happy. It made Remus think of Sirius.

Before he had Apparated to Surrey, to relieve Emmeline Vance of her guard duty, Sirius had again tried to persuade Remus to take him with him. Remus had had to force himself to keep denying, even when Sirius had nearly lowered himself to begging. Remus only succeeded in not giving in by telling himself constantly that Sirius was safer inside. Sirius had angrily narrowed his eyes when he had realised that Remus was serious, and he had restlessly walked up the stairs. Just as restlessly as Harry haunted the streets.

Sitting on a kerb between two parked cars in a deserted street on a warm evening turned out to be great for thinking. Remus' mind wandered about as he kept an eye on the Dursley's house.

He remembered what Sirius had said that afternoon: 'you want me stuck in this house, don't you?' If he was really honest with himself, Remus had to admit it was true. He did want Sirius kept safe inside, away from the dangerous world outside. The problem was that Sirius wasn't an indoor-person, not even in a large house like Grimmauld Place. Or perhaps especially not in a house like 12 Grimmauld Place. Remus lived there now, but he could at least go out of doors, unlike Sirius. And unlike Sirius, Remus didn't have bad childhood memories connected to every room. Not to mention the evil house-elf stalking about.

His mind turned to Hermione. She had defended Kreacher so passionately – it was obvious to Remus that she hadn't changed in the year since he'd last seen her. He had to admit he could see her point – but on the other hand he could fully understand Sirius too. But they were both so godforsaken stubborn... He sighed and smiled at the same time. Sirius always claimed that Hermione was like Remus, but, Remus thought, they might actually have their stubbornness in common.

He went over their conversation again and repeated his own words to himself. Try to judge the person and not the stereotype, he thought. That's actually a really good advice. I can pat myself on the back.

The sound of a door opening made him look up. Dudley Dursley had appeared in the door of number 4 Privet Drive.

"I'm going out, mum!" he called. "I'll be at Gordon's!" He didn't wait for a reply, took his bike and cycled away, out of the street. Remus didn't watch him go; he hadn't even moved. Dudley was of no concern to him.

A few minutes later, the door opened again and Harry walked out. Remus sat upright, his attention peaked.

Harry had been looking slightly glum for the past few weeks, but tonight he looked especially depressed. Remus suspected it had something to do with today being his birthday: Ron, Hermione and Sirius had lobbied for making a surprise visit, but they had only been allowed to send gifts and birthday cards. Remus figured Harry must think it a really lousy birthday.

Without looking left or right, Harry walked onto the pavement and into the direction Dudley had gone. Remus got to his feet and followed, making sure the Cloak was still neatly wrapped around him.

He actually hated to do this. He'd much rather throw the Cloak off and reveal himself, but he wasn't allowed. Pretty much the first rule of the Order was: don't get noticed. That was why Moody had loaned one of his Invisibility Cloaks to the people doing guard duty. That was why Remus was walking several yards behind Harry, trying to be as quiet as possible. And it was why Tonks was excused guard duty; they couldn't risk her accidentally walking into a parked car or, God forbid, Harry himself.

Harry was following his usual haunt again. Out of Privet Drive, into Magnolia Crescent, then Magnolia Road, past the small playground with it's broken swings, then back through Magnolia Crescent, through the alleyway between the Crescent and Wisteria Walk until he had reached Privet Drive again. He had walked it so often that to Remus he almost seemed to be sleepwalking.

Within half an hour, they were back at the Dursley's. Harry went back inside and Remus went to sit on the kerb again, musing about how boring guard duty was. The hands of his watch seemed to creep forward, and he felt utterly relieved when Elphias Doge showed up for the next round of keeping watch.

Not to Remus' surprise, Sirius had stayed up to wait until he came home. He was in fact waiting in the hall, almost literally breathing down Remus' neck when he came in.

"And?" he breathed, minding Mrs Black, who was softly snoring in her frame. Remus gestured for them to go down to the kitchen.

There was nobody there, although there were signs that a large group of people had been there not too long ago. Mugs and plates with crumbs cluttered the long table, and the dishes in the sink were not yet done.

"And?" Sirius repeated before they were even properly downstairs.

"Bored," Remus answered truthfully.

Sirius snorted disdainfully. "I'm not surprised. It must be very boring, having to spend your entire day among the family you hate."

Remus didn't react, ignoring the bait for comments about Sirius' own family. He rubbed his eyes. "Is there anything to drink?" he asked.

"Yeah, we got Butterbeer, tea, and – a tiny little bit of cold former-hot chocolate," Sirius said.

"Butterbeer, cold please."

When they had installed themselves on one end of the table, an ice-cold bottle of Butterbeer in their hands, Remus admitted: "don't tell anyone, but I actually just wish something would happen. Waiting is terrible."

Sirius nodded somewhat sadly. "I know what you mean." He opened both bottles and lifted his own in the air. "To something exciting, then?"

"Yes, to something exciting."

Neither of them remembered the saying 'be careful what you wish for' until a few days later, when they got the news that Harry had been attacked by Dementors.

Author's note

You know I was actually really peeved at Jo Rowling last monday? I'm sure you can figure out why: the whole deal about Sirius not keeping to his own advice and stuff. I had made up that conversation more than six months ago! I was writing Wanderings when it popped into my head, and I was so proud of myself, of the thought that just occurred to me. Yes, I had an original, though-provoking idea that made for a great conversation!
In waltzes Jo with exactly the same thing, and now everybody knows it. And she 'stole' my idea of Sirius mentally still being 22 (or 21, or however) too. At least I already used that one in the final chapter of 'Wanderings'.
But yeah, I was pretty chagrined. I decided to just stuck the conversation in this chapter and be done with it - it was originally supposed to take place when Harry was already at Grimmauld Place. But I thought I might as well put it in now.

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