My God, those are good genes.
---Finn, A House is Not a Home

"Is this place for real?" Colin whispered from the backseat as Finn drove the SUV through Stars Hollow on the way to Rory's house. He looked sideways at Stephanie who just shrugged at him and continued to file her nails. "A candy shop? They have a candy shop but I don't see a liquor store."

"Shut up, it's cute," Stephanie whispered back. She placed her nail file back in her purse and looked out the window. "We are definitely over the rainbow." She rolled her eyes at Colin's blank stare. "The Wizard of Oz," she said with a sigh.

"How quaint," Colin muttered. His head was turned sideways and he didn't see Rory swing around in her seat ahead of him and smack him lightly against the head until she was done.

"Don't be an ass Colin," she said with a smile.

"Yeah Colin, don't be an ass," Logan said, though his tone wasn't as friendly as Rory's had been.

"Colin's always an ass," Stephanie mumbled.

Rory whipped around in her seat again. "No!" she cried in a dismayed tone. "No, no, no!"

"What?" Logan asked, twisting around to look at Colin and Stephanie as well.

"You're fighting, aren't you?" Rory asked, glaring at the couple. Stephanie merely shrugged her shoulders. "They're fighting!" she said helplessly, turning to Logan. She turned back to Stephanie. "You didn't tell me you were fighting when I called you and invited you along with the boys! Why didn't you tell me you were fighting?"

"Because we weren't fighting then," Stephanie said simply.

"This is true, we fought late last night," Colin said. Stephanie made a face at him. "Apparently, we're still fighting."

"Why?" Rory asked plaintively. For the last year and a half, Colin and Stephanie had proved that a love and hate relationship could indeed work if the relationship was more hate than love.

"Because he's an ass," Stephanie repeated.

"We don't have time for this," Rory hissed at Logan. "I can't play referee to them and you and my mother at the same time!"

"Let him be an ass," Finn said cheerfully from the driver's seat. "I know I'd like to see the lovely Lorelai put him in his rightful place." He glanced at Rory through the rearview mirror and winked. "Do I turn left or right here?"

"Right. You'll know the house when you see it." Rory set her sunglasses on top of her head and fiddled with her hair nervously. She managed a half-smile as Logan patted her hand reassuringly.

"Well I do believe we're here," Finn said as he pulled the car into the driveway and parked in front of the front door.

"Okay wait!" Rory instructed, stopping everyone before they could get out of the vehicle. "I'm begging you all, please, please, please be on your best behavior this weekend." She sighed when she saw the blank looks on everyone's faces. "This is not a Life and Death Brigade event you're going to tomorrow, it's a small town fundraiser. It is not like any charity event you've been to in Hartford." She paused.

"Rory darling, we know how important this is," Finn said as he stepped out of the car and stretched his legs. "We are all perfectly well aware of the situation and that if Logan here messes up we'll never see you properly married, and that, pretty girl, is a party I'm not soon to give up." He grabbed Colin's arm and yanked until they were standing next to each other. She sighed as Colin and Finn both raised their hands in a salute towards her. "As sure as Colin and I stand here before you, we solemnly do swear to charm your mother, dazzle the townspeople, and not embarrass you. Until death do us part." He paused. "Well I guess we don't really need that last part, do we?"

"I'm sorry, did you just say dazzle?" Logan asked. Finn nodded. He slammed the car door shut and turned to Rory. "Ready?"

"Yes," she said, sliding her hand into his. She cast another glance at Colin and Finn who were now fighting over who was going to carry their bags into the house and then looked at Stephanie who was handing her bags to Finn. "Let's go," she said, attempting to be cheerful. As they climbed the steps to the front door she felt Logan's thumb rub over her ring finger and she bit the inside of her cheeks to keep from smiling. Ever since they had had their talk, Logan had done this every time he held her hand and while she wasn't sure if it was conscious or not, she wasn't going to complain.

"So Finn," Colin leaned closer so that his friend could hear his whisper. "That oath we just gave Gilmore?"

Finn shrugged and hoisted Stephanie's bag over his shoulder. "I don't know about you Col, but my fingers were crossed."

"Seriously, you guys are four," Stephanie complained, coming up behind them.

"And you'd be all about it if you weren't using all of your energy being pissy towards Colin," Finn remarked. He ducked as she swung at him and Rory looked back at them with a frown. This weekend was going to go so well.

"We're here!" Rory called as she opened the front door and they all piled into the hallway. "Mom?"

"Welcome to the Gilmore House of Ill Repute!" Lorelai's voice floated down the staircase before she appeared at the landing. "Where my girls are always classy, the men often assy and I," she walked down the remaining steps and stood in front of them, her hands clasped in front of her. "Am your queen. Worship me and bow at my feet."

"Did your mother just call you a whore?" Colin questioned as Rory giggled. She threw her arms around Lorelai in a hug.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, hug hug, kiss kiss." Lorelai wrapped an arm around Rory's waist and looked expectantly at the rest of the group. "Do they think I was joking about the bowing?" she asked out of the corner of her mouth.

"They're not going to bow to you mom." Before the words were out of her mouth, Finn had dropped to his knees in a sweeping bow, going as far as to kiss Lorelai's shoe. "Okay maybe they are."

"Smart boy," Lorelai said as she motioned for Finn to stand up again. She went back to staring at the group. "Well, I gotta say, when you called and told me you were bringing everyone, I never expected Alfalfa, Uh-huh, Spanky and Darla to show up." She took in the blank faces and silence before turning back to Rory. "You're kidding, right?" she asked, her voice full of disbelief.

"The Little Rascals." Logan spoke up finally and was pleased to see a smile grace the elder Gilmore's features, if only for a split second.

"Score one for Richie Rich," she said. "Hey Logan."

"Hello Lorelai."

Another uncomfortable moment of silence overtook the room before she spoke up again. "As fascinating as the hallway is, why don't you all come in to the house?" she asked as she turned and headed towards the kitchen. "Rory, go ahead and take everyone into the living room, I'll go get some drinks."

"She's fabulous!" Finn exclaimed. "You're fabulous," he said again, directing the comment at Lorelai this time.

"Thank you." Lorelai looked at Rory. "Is he drunk?"

"Drinks mom!"

"On my way." Lorelai shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot before heading into the kitchen as Rory led everyone towards the living room.

Logan stopped her in the doorway and offered her a smile. "It's going to be okay," he said as he placed a reassuring kiss on her forehead before following her into the living room.

Lorelai stood in the kitchen and stared out the window. Something was going on and she was the only one who didn't know what it was. She hated that. And whatever was going on had something to do with her daughter and she hated that more. She heard Logan talking to Rory in the hallway and her heart stopped. Oh no…

"Oh my God, you're pregnant!" Lorelai stormed back into the living room wielding a large butcher knife.

"What?" Rory jumped up from her chair. "Mom, what are you—"

"You're pregnant!" she repeated. "All day, I've been wracking my brain, I couldn't understand why you were bringing all of your friends to the dance. I mean, I could understand bringing Logan, he's your boyfriend, but the other three, no offense, I just don't see this as their type of thing. It all makes sense now, though. You're pregnant!" She waved the knife around maniacally as she spoke.

"You are?" Logan asked, looking at Rory, fear evident in his eyes as he too, stood up.

"No!" She looked at her mother who screamed the word pregnant again. "Stop saying that!" she scolded. Colin and Finn were trying to contain themselves and Stephanie just stared at the scene in front of her.

"You are!" Lorelai cried, nearly hysterical by now. "Of course you are! You wanted to tell me this weekend but were scared of what I'd say or do, and so you thought hey, maybe my crazy mother won't kill my boyfriend in front of his friends so I'll just bring them all along!" She swung around and pointed the knife at Logan, who was now backed up against the fireplace. "You got my daughter pregnant and now I will have your head!"

"Mom stop!" Rory begged, placing her hand on Lorelai's arm. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Finn and Colin now rolling around on the floor laughing. "I'm not pregnant!" she said again. "I'm not."

"You're not?" Lorelai turned and searched her daughter's eyes. "You're not," she conceded as Rory took the knife from her. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. "Good, that's good." She turned to Logan then. "You can keep your head. For now."

"Thanks," Logan said. He edged his way back to the sofa and sat down. Crazy, he mouthed to Rory who just shook her head.

"Brava!" Finn yelled, standing up and clapping his hands. Colin joined him, and they applauded for a few moments more. "Lorelai love, you are truly my favorite girl!" he said, grabbing her hand and raising it to his lips. "I've always known Rory got her smashing good looks from you, but I see now, her theatrics come from the same genes. Imagine what your children will be like!" he directed the last comment at Logan and Rory.

"Finn!" Rory and Logan's voices blended together as they both glared at him. "I'm not pregnant," Rory added for good measure.

"Right." Lorelai just stared at them for a moment. "I'll go get those drinks now."

"I'll help you," Rory said as she followed her out of the room. She glanced over her shoulder to see Finn and Colin were still doubled over with laughter and just sighed.

"What was that?" Rory demanded as soon as she was in the kitchen.

"I thought you were pregnant!" Lorelai said defensively.

"And your first thought was to come after us with a knife?"

"Not you honey, him."

"Oh right, because that's so much better." Rory pulled several glasses out of the cupboard and faced her mother again. "You're going to be on your best behavior this weekend right?" she asked, cringing that she had to give this talk yet again.

"Honey, I have to be. I'm in charge of the dance, in case you don't remember."

Rory laughed at the evil twinkle in Lorelai's eye. "And you're mad with power already. I'm almost afraid to see what happens tomorrow."

"Well let's just say that this year, Kirk is going down." Lorelai cackled evilly and picked up the tray to carry into the other room. "Come on, let's go see if Logan can look me in the eye yet."

"You're impossible," Rory said with a shake of her head.

"No knife this time?" Finn asked in a disappointed tone as they came back into the room.

"No, I'm afraid you only get one pre-dinner show at this house and that was it." Lorelai set her tray down and looked around. "Hey, aren't we missing a few stooges?"

Logan looked apologetically at Rory before he spoke. "Steph and Colin got into another fight and decided to take it upstairs away from Finn."

"I was just trying to help," Finn insisted.

"Trouble in paradise, interesting," Lorelai mused. "Anything good enough that we should be on the staircase listening?"

"Only if you're interested in hearing about Colin not deleting Anna's phone number from his cell," Logan said in a bored tone. Rory giggled.

"Anna, who's Anna?" Lorelai asked.

"His step-sister from his dad's fourth marriage." Logan shrugged. "Apparently Steph forgot about her. They'll come down in a few minutes and hopefully they'll be done with that round." He put his arm around Rory and continued talking. "So Lorelai, tell me about this dance thing. Rory's too scared to say anything other than the basic things that always seem to happen."

"Ah, well, if you knew half of what could happen, you wouldn't be here right now," Lorelai pointed out. "Did she tell you how last year, it only took four minutes for Andrew and his date to get into a fight and as he was walking off the floor she threw her shoe at him and knocked him out? It's a good thing the paramedics were there already, however it did take a few minutes for them to draw straws to see who would forfeit the contest to help him out." Lorelai's eyes lit up. "Oh! Did she tell you that while Kirk was taking his victory lap, someone switched the music so that it wasn't the theme from Rocky but a classic Def Leppard song?" She sat back and smirked. "Whoever did that was brilliant."

"No, she definitely didn't tell me any of that," Logan said.

"Honestly," Finn said with wide eyes. "Why aren't we married yet?"

"Because I'm already married."

"You are?"

"You were at the wedding." Lorelai looked at Rory. "Seriously, is he drunk?"

"It's possible," Rory answered.

"Lorelai, really, leave your husband!" Finn dropped down to his knees in front of her. "I'll sail us away to Fiji, if that's what it takes. Anything you desire will be yours at the snap of your lovely fingers."

"Save the Prince Charming act for someone else," Lorelai said with a roll of her eyes. "Maybe Babette will fall for it, but I won't."

"You hate me," Finn said sadly.

"I don't hate you Finn," she said. "I just know you. All to well."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I've done the drunken socialite debauchery. There's nothing you've done that I haven't, only I did it better." Rory and Logan just sat back and watched the conversation volley back and forth.

"Blasphemy!" Finn scoffed.

"Finn, darling," she said mockingly. "For everything you've done, I've done it better. I did it before you, I did it better than you, and…" she paused dramatically. "I did it in heels."

He stared at her a moment. "You're challenge is accepted," he said seriously as he rose to his feet and headed for the stairs, yelling for Stephanie.

"What is he doing?" Lorelai asked, swinging around to look at Rory and Logan.

"Looking for a pair of heels." Rory shrugged, as she was used to these things by now. "By the way, where is Luke? Is he at the diner?"

"Yes, he is, and he said to send you all down there…" she looked at her watch. "Right about now, actually, and he'd feed you." They all looked up as Stephanie and Colin emerged from upstairs and Stephanie was shaking her head.

"Do I even want to know why?" she asked, gesturing as Finn walked past her, down the stairs and into the living room. Rory and Logan shook their heads no and Finn held one foot up, teetering slightly as he did so.

"Will these suffice?" he asked, looking at Lorelai for confirmation.

"Absolutely." She tried not to laugh. "Oh I wish I could see the looks on everyone's faces when you show up at Luke's in those," she said. "You'll be lucky if Luke even serves you."

"You're not coming?" Rory asked.

"No I am, I'm just going to be a few minutes behind you. I have to run a few things to Patty's first and go over some last minute details with hers. Don't get me wrong," Lorelai's eyes gleamed as she grinned. "Personally, I'd love to see how you three boys would handle Miss Patty, but I think it's better saved until tomorrow morning." She looked at her watch again. "Luke's waiting, you know what happens if he waits too long."

"Right, we're going." Rory stood up, pulling Logan and Finn up with her. On their way out, Lorelai could hear her daughter questioning Finn on his antics and yelled at her not to let Kirk anywhere near her shoes.

"You guys go on," Logan said as they reached the driveway. Rory looked at him curiously. "I'm going to see if Lorelai needs any help getting things over to Patty's," he explained.

"Sucking up already, I like that." Rory smiled. "Keep her away from the knives and you'll be good. See you in a little bit."

Lorelai looked up as Logan came back into the house. "Did you forget something?" she asked.

"No." He moved to take a stack of boxes from her hands and set them down on the floor. "Actually, I was hoping we could talk for a minute." He shoved his hands in his pockets and waited as Lorelai gave him a quick once-over.

"Is my daughter pregnant?"

Logan laughed. "Not that I'm aware of."

"Yeah, you looked pretty shocked when I said that actually. Sure." She sat down on the sofa and patted the seat next to her. "Let's chat."

Logan took his seat. After a moment's hesitation he handed Lorelai the ring box. She opened it and whistled.

"Why Mr. Huntzberger, that's very sweet, but as I told your Finn, I'm already married." Lorelai snapped the box shut and looked back at him. "So, you want permission to marry my daughter?"

"Actually, no," Logan said honestly.

"No?" she repeated.

"Lorelai, you know Rory better than I do. You know she'd marry me with or without your permission.

"Good point. What then?"

"Well, while she might not care about permission, there is one thing that would keep her from marrying me."

"Your trust fund is too big?"

"You hate me."

"I don't hate you."

"You once compared me to an avocado."

"Actually, I said I preferred avocado to you." Lorelai sighed. "So, you're not my favorite choice for Rory, so what? You said so yourself, she'll marry you if she wants to."

"If it was just the matter of having your permission or not, you're right, she would." He hesitated. "But if she were to say yes and you didn't approve, well that's another story."

Lorelai sat back against the couch and clasped her hands in front of her, biting the tips of both index fingers. "This is a total Godfather moment." Her smile faded at the expression on Logan's face. "Right, playtime over, serious face on." She settled her hands in her lap.

"There's really not much to say," he said. "I want to marry Rory but the only way that's going to happen is if I can get you to like me."

"That's so much power!"

Logan couldn't make out her words as she spoke to herself. "What?"

"Nothing, sorry. Continue." She looked at him expectantly.

"That's it really," he said. "I need you to like me."

"Have you already asked my daughter to marry you?"

"Technically, no." He smiled as he thought back to their hypothetical conversation. "But she knows that I plan on it and she's told me pretty clearly that this is the only thing keeping her from saying yes."

"That puts me in a pretty extreme position." Lorelai chewed on her lower lip and opened the ring box again. "Is this a family ring?" she questioned.

"No, I picked it out myself." Logan shuddered, thinking back to the argument with his father. "I figured Rory would prefer something from just me."

"Mitchum wouldn't give you the ring, eh?" She chuckled as he shook his head no. "You've got good taste kid, I'll give you that. Rory will love this." She closed it and tapped her finger against the lid. "So, what do you want from me Logan? You want me to tell Rory I like you and that I'm okay with this? Let's go, I'll tell her right now."

"Just like that?" Logan raised an eyebrow.

"Just like that." Lorelai stood up.

"You would lie to Rory's face?"

"Normally, never, but if that's how you want to do this, then let's go."

"No." Logan sat firm on the couch.

"No?"

"No." He shook his head. "You're not going to lie to Rory. I came here this weekend to get you to like me, and I'm one hundred percent positive that I can get you to love me in twenty-four hours."

Lorelai laughed. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh. Okay, so I do." She laughed some more. "I've known you two years Logan, and this is the first time I haven't imagined a way to kill you in your sleep."

"You came at me with a knife," he pointed out.

"And you handled that very well!" Lorelai praised him as she sat back down. "I gotta hand it to you Logan, you passed the first test. You didn't take the easy way out. But what happens if I don't like you by the end of the weekend?"

"I haven't even considered that," Logan admitted. He flashed a grin at her. "Lorelai, like I said, you're going to love me when it comes down to it. I have no doubt in that, I will do whatever it takes."

"Break up with my daughter."

"Anything but that."

Lorelai grinned. "Can't blame a girl for trying. You do realize you basically just became my whipping boy for the dance, right? That's how I'm seeing it anyways."

"I wouldn't expect anything less," Logan declared.

"Hmm. So is there a chance my daughter will be wearing this ring by the end of the weekend?"

Logan shrugged. "You know, I don't know. All she said was that you had to like me. We never talked about a time frame beyond that."

"You know I could prolong this, just for my amusement?" He nodded. "Just checking." She looked at the ring once more and then back at him. "Hit me with your best shot Huntzberger," she said, offering him her hand.

He took it and shook it firmly. "Lorelai, you're going to love me by Sunday," he said, hoping he sounded more confident than he felt.

"Is my Rory pregnant?"

"No."

"Well then, keep Finn from hitting on me in front of my husband and you may be right Logan, you may be right." She laced her fingers together in front of her. "Oh, the fun I am going to have with you this weekend!"

He laughed at her. "You really are crazy," he said, picking up the stack of boxes he had taken from her earlier.

"Riiight. Finn's in heels and I'm the crazy one. Those boxes can go to the Jeep."

Logan exhaled the breath he hadn't known he was holding and carried the boxes outside. As they headed into town he thought briefly that Rory would end up just like Lorelai, and while that thought would have made most men run in the opposite direction as fast as they could he was surprised to find that he wouldn't have it any other way.

Lorelai may not end up liking him by the end of the weekend, he knew that was a very good possibility, but there was one thing he knew for sure, and he was willing to bet everything on it.

This weekend was going to be very interesting.

A.N. Thanks to everyone who's read this so far! I'm so happy that you've enjoyed it so far and I hope that this chapter is up to par. I'm not entirely sure about it. I know nothing really seems to happen, but I decided it was all necessary, as it sets up a huge portion of the rest of this story. (I did have to come up with 24 hours worth of entertainment, after all.) My biggest concern however, is how I wrote Lorelai, who in my opinion, is the hardest character to write...definitely my biggest challenge so far. Any criticism or opinions any of you may have on how I did, I'm more than happy to take it all into consideration!