Author's Note: evildildo, how did the finalgo? Yes, these people are my friends and classmates(and myself). I got their permission to put them in, but a lot of them begged me to anyway. LibraHorse liked it so much she let me put it on I'll be pretty busy this summer, but I promise to update as often as I can!

Pat R. heard Caitlin's story and despaired. Teachers weren't people they could truest. If they were to make it out of this ordeal, they would have to do it without any outside help. No fairies, no drunken swordsmen, no ancient heroes and certainly no shotgun-toting history teachers. He begged that Kyle create a new machine. He pleaded for Pat to make a new explosive. He even beseeched Dan to dance a dance so horrible that it would rip the fabric of space and time, but Julie yelled at him.

"You know what Julie? You're not funny! BURN!"

Julie was about to make an equally clever retort when Tybalt fell through the church doors. He babbled some of the most incoherent babble that the students had ever heard. When he realized his audience was about as understanding as Mrs. Joe Gargery, he bit his thumb and cried, "You blocks! You stones! You WORSE THAN SENSELESS THINGS!"

Taesup took great offense to this. "Do you bite your thumb at me, sir?"

"I do, sir."

Taesup drew his sword. "Then have at thee, villan!"

Taesup may have been an economical genius, making quadbajillions® every year, well-spoken and kind, but he was not a swordsman. Perhaps it was merely the fact that Tybalt had just endured unspeakable horrors (and the fact that Taesup can't die, he's a hero) that Taesup wasn't maimed, killed, or otherwise injured in the few seconds it took Tybalt to disarm him. Taesup fainted.

"Perhaps now we could hear Tybalt's story?" asked Stephanie.

And so they did. "After you got captured, I went to save my cousin, Juliet. I infiltrated the Really Big Fortress of Evil with County Paris, until I was in Escalus' throne room. Paris was taken prisoner, and I was surrounded. The prince began to talk to me with strange words like 'intern-et' and 'computer moniters'. Suddenly, one of the walls lit up with a malignant light. Where the wall was, there was a moving picture of Prince Escalus dancing! …It was horrible. He said he could send it anywhere in the world using this 'internet' and he would soon take over the world!"

His usefulness as a character exhausted, Tybalt fainted on the floor next to Taesup.

Once again, Blake was the first to have anything to say about this bizarre occurrence: "Pip has internet access!"

Pat R. rolled his eyes. "Pip is going to take over the world with movies of him dancing? Lame."

Chris said, "I'm hungry."

Further discussion of Plan Delta was put to an end by twenty-five Royal Sentinels who marched through the heavy wooden doors of the church. "Fair citizens of Verona! The benign Prince Escalus alerts all civilians to be on for several armed and dangerous foreigners who have made an attempt on his life."

Royal Sentinel of Fair Verona #144 continued the proclamation: "If it is suspected that you are related to these conspirators, that you know these conspirators, are these conspirators, know of someone who knows these conspirators, might know someone who knows these conspirators, you shall be put to death. If…"

Royal Sentinel of Fair Verona #285 interrupted, "Can we just kill them now?"

"No, we have to read the whole proclamation first."

"But they have to fit on that list somewhere. Let's save time and kill them!"

"You're not very good at this are you?"

By the time the twenty-five soldiers had finished their discussion of proper goon conduct, their quarry had fled into the streets with Tybalt and Taesup on Tim's shoulders.

On a nondescript rooftop the next morning, the students, Mercutio, Tybalt, and Odysseus watched the army of Verona patrol the city. No one was quite sure how Verona had such an army, but regardless, they were surrounded on all sides. Our heroes debated on the best course of action. They had two possible plans.

Plan A, submitted by Odysseus, had everyone get inside a giant wooden horse and roll out of town. This was regarded as a very stupid idea.

Plan B involved everyone fleeing for their lives. This was more popular than its variant, Plan 2B, which had a select few suicidal enough to create a distraction while everyone else fled for their lives. In the end, it was 2B or not 2B.

Author's Note: I think the ending is great. I was going to include anedited version of Hamlet's famous soliloquy here, but it was pretty bad. I think it's funnier the way it is now. If you want me to put it in the next chapter, please do so. Thank you. As a point of interest, this is the third time I've had to repost this chapter, thanks to the evils of bad editing and internet trouble.