Chapter 14
• Return to Hogwarts •
"After tonight we wont be able to do this," Tonks said as she held Harry a little tighter.
It was the same thought Harry was having. He had gotten to know Tonks so well in the past few months that he almost felt more comfortable sleeping with her at his side than sleeping alone. He never thought he'd feel that way.
Struggling about what to say, Harry pulled her arm closer. "I know," he whispered. "You're going to still come and teach me things sometimes right? Like on Hogsmeade's weekends or weekends you can get off?"
"Yeah, I'll come to the castle as much as I can. I'm sure I could pose as some giggling schoolgirl and never even be noticed."
"Not if you're around me." Harry said sadly. "Everyone always knows what goes on around me."
There was a silence that followed his comment, and Harry could hear Tonks thinking. He didn't prefer to talk about himself, especially if this was the last night. "I'm going to miss everything," he whispered. "The broom races and the games. It was fun to learn Auror tricks, and I wish we could do more."
"Yeah," Tonks said distantly. "Going back to the island was interesting."
Harry thought about the island, the forever grinning Darrian, Riana and Korina. He shivered when he thought about Korina and shoved the memory from his mind, he didn't want to remember the night he'd spent with her. There was Jack, which he wondered if he'd could play it again anytime soon. No one apparated in Hogwarts grounds so he was sure that he couldn't do it here.
Something came to mind when he thought about the island. A word Darrian explanation Tonks had given him, a word that meant nothing to him. "Tonks?" he asked. "What is Viatorian?"
There was a quick intake of breath and Harry could hear her heart beating faster. She did restrain from an immediate response though. "Harry?" she asked. "Do you know what the Mafia is?"
It was an odd question. He'd heard the word mafia before, Vernon had used it a great deal a few years prior, when there was a scandal within Grunnings, the company he worked for. Apparently one of the managers within the company had ties to the mafia and had been using the company to launder money. The whole thing had made Vernon seriously nervous, but the company had come through and since it wasn't in Vernon's department he'd had little to do with it.
"A gang?" Harry asked tentatively. He was sure it was some sort of large illegal gang. Vernon had never offered a full explanation
Tonks giggled. "That's a bit of an understatement," she said, rolling Harry so that he was facing her. He didn't resist.
"The Mafia is a very old group of organized crime originating in Italy. Several countries have different forms of it. This group is secretive and powerful, holding a great deal of sway in politics. They also have a lot of money. If muggles have such powerful groups it is obvious that something like that would grow in the magical world as well."
Harry just stared at her. Of course there were bad gangs in the magical world, Voldemort and his DE were one of them.
"There's a group that controls a large portion of the wizarding world through it's influence, though not so much in England, but in other countries. They're very secretive and few people know much about them. There are of course rumors that spread, as with all things, but most of them are fantasy."
"This group is very careful about their dealings, rarely coming out into the open. In order to join the group you must meet certain prerequisites. They never approach people without a very good understanding of the person. But, somehow a long time ago, I was approached."
She paused, rubbing her inner arm unconsciously. "I was a bit of a rebel then, a black dragon in the family. I had gone to Hogwarts for a couple of years but decided I didn't like it there so I went to my aunts on Icaria for a summer and decided I'd rather stay there than go back. I took schooling there some of the time, but mostly I got into a gang and we played games with the tourists to cheat them out of their money. You got a taste of the sort of thing I did, meeting Darrian and his group. Back then I was even worse."
"My aunt died while I was there, and no one even knew I'd had an aunt. I spent very little time at her place until after she died, and I took it over after that. I was only fifteen but I was smart and never told anyone what had happened. By that time I had gained quite a reputation on the street. No one knew exactly who I really was, they didn't know how old I was or what I really looked like. I wasn't the best with my abilities then, but I could change my face pretty well."
"I even had a name on the street," she paused for a second and smiled blandly. "They called my Nymph. That's all anyone ever knew me by. I was the best and everyone knew it."
"My parents wrote me constantly, trying to find out where I was. It hadn't taken them all that long to figure out my aunt had died. She quit writing them about me, and they got scared. When they showed up to find me they were met with someone who had taken over my aunts house and didn't know me at all. So all they could do was go back home. My parents knew I had metamorph abilities, but didn't realize I was able to change into different people. No one in the family had ever had the abilities and no one was quite sure how much I could do."
Tonks stopped for a minute and pulled the covers back, slipping out of bed. Harry had a chance to think about what she was saying. Sometimes he wished he could run away and go to a place like Icaria. His aunt and uncle wouldn't come and look for him though, they'd be glad to be rid of him.
Tonks poured a glass of water from the pitcher and after drinking it returned to bed. It didn't look as if she'd needed the water, but rather to get up and think about things for a minute.
"When I was first approached I didn't even realize it. Someone gave me a tip about a pair or tourists on vacation and I played games with them until I finally swindled them out of most of their money. The person returned after I was done with the couple, they weren't really tourists, they'd just been testing me. Apparently I passed."
"You hear about powerful people on the streets, about people that can make things happen, but I never thought I'd meet on of them. I was just a street bum who was good at what I did. So, when they approached me with an offer to be tested further and see if I was good enough to become a Viatorian I was ecstatic. If I became one of them then I'd have money and power – I didn't know the consequences. So, I accepted the next test."
She closed her eyes for a minute, reliving the moment. When she opened them again she found it hard to break eye contact with Harry. She was quite ashamed of what had transpired after she had joined, but had told herself that she would not lie to Harry about it if he asked.
"Because they were a very elite group I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but I'd been on my own for long enough to know I could hold my own and I was confident. The group knew things about me though, more than anyone else I knew on the island. They didn't know where I'd really come from though, which is what saved me in the end. And they didn't know my true face either – no one did."
"So, I was given a task to perform, along with rigid guidelines about using magic. In fact, my wand was confiscated so that I could not use it while I was on the mission. I was transported to a large city in Mexico, and charged with entering into a house and stealing a mask that was important to the group. At first it was hard, I was just dropped there without knowing anyone or having any grasp of the language. It didn't take long for me to make friends in the street, but it took me a full week to get some slim grasp of the language."
"After that it wasn't very difficult. The house was large and well guarded, but it had some easy ways in. A lot of things could have gone wrong, and even though I was able to get in a lot of things did go wrong. It took another week to get into the house, but I got in as a..." her voice faltered for a moment. "puta," she paused again, trying to make up her mind.
"It wasn't the best way in, but it got me in. So, I was able to retrieve the mask and get out."
"When I finally made it back to a place I was told to deliver it to someone waiting for me. They liked my work. I was offered a position in the order, as an apprentice – but it was still something. I didn't even hesitate to say yes, after everything I'd done I was excited that I might be able to do more things like that. I was returned to the island and my training began."
"Some of the training was in a normal school, they influenced my teachers and I received a transfer with top marks. They never let them drop though, I was put under a very harsh study and training schedule. I did other things, stuff on the island mostly, and I began to understand what I'd gotten myself into. There was a person, someone I knew, who I delivered to the order to be tested. He passed the first test, I knew he would, he was quite good at swindling. But during the second test something happened and he failed and returned empty handed... I never saw him again."
Again she paused, and Harry could see her pushing back tears. The person had meant a lot to her and it was difficult for her to relive the choices she'd made, the things that had happened. It wasn't just the one boy either, but at the moment that was enough to get the point across.
"After that I came to understand exactly what the group was willing to do to gain and keep power. I did more too, things that I will dread for the rest of my life. I was still a good student though, and they liked me a lot. No one was going to let me leave the order – it was an unspoken rule. No one leaves the order except in death."
Harry hadn't spoken a word since the story had started, he was letting her tell it, but he felt something stir in him, something that didn't sit right. "If they're such a powerful gang how come I've never heard of them?" It was a stupid question and he knew it. If Hermione hadn't heard of them that might be different, but she wasn't around and he certainly wasn't going to owl her about it.
"In England things are different. Because the ministry has put up a strong opposition to the group, they've gone into hiding, they have not made any official appearances in over two centuries around here. They still have the sway though, I know, I saw them do thing that were horrible here as well as other places."
"There was a woman, someone I knew from before, who came to me one day. I was a little surprised, the woman knew my past and had never revealed it. I didn't even know she'd come to the island, but she was there and I suddenly had a friend who was willing to help me. I trusted her a lot, and eventually we discovered a way to escape. I left and she was able to make sure that it looked as if I'd died. They never found out I really didn't die but I never wanted to go back because they might find out. You don't just leave them because they make sure that it's permanent."
Harry shivered, he had a pretty good idea what she had meant by that and he really didn't want to know anymore about it.
He nodded and then closed his eyes. "So you came back home to get away from them?"
"After being gone for two years my mum was willing to forgive everything when I walked back in. Dad was a little wary, but let it drop. So I went back to Hogwarts. It was the middle of my sixth year, and I had gone a little astray of my teachings but I was able to take my O.W.L.s and get top marks because of my training. After that everything just sort of happened, after getting high marks on my N.E.W.T.s I tried to decide what to do. My mum suggested I go into the Aurors."
Harry smiled and remembered what she'd been like the year before. "Which is the reason you met me."
Tonks smiled back. "Yeah," she said. "I guess sometimes things go better than you'd expected."
"You said you almost failed the Stealth and Tracking as an Auror. I wanted to know why, I mean, I know you're clumsy, but you have your metamorph abilities, how did you almost fail?"
She laughed. "Harry stealth was not a test to follow someone, it was a test to see if I could get across a room without tripping any alarms, there wasn't a single person involved. And tracking, well, it's a bit difficult in a muggle city with hundreds of people around you at all times. You can't use magic openly or be obviously following someone. I did alright, but the only reason I passed was because the tests had a combined overall score. I did well on everything else though."
"What about flying?" Harry asked, remembering her odd ability to take extraordinary turns and move like Harry'd never seen.
"Well see..." she smiled again. "When you can shape your body any way you like you can change a lot of things to make you more aerodynamic. Mass and weight are the key, if two brooms raced and one was unmanned while the other was controlled by a wizard, which do you think would win the race? That is, if the unmanned one was controlled by someone and could move as fast as it was designed for."
"The unmanned one," Harry replied, and then understood. "You can make yourself lighter?"
"Well it's not that simple, I can but I loose things, muscle mass and bones, that sort of thing. If I'm flying I have to make sure that I have enough strength to move the broom around and that I can stay alive with the wind that's whipping against me. I used to do it when I felt the need to get away from everything. They knew of course, but never could figure out who I was. I kept changing players."
"The main person I played as was Seonaidh though, and I got famous fast so I had to quit. There were some questions about how I was doing things that the judges thought were impossible. They thought I was cheating somehow, which I guess I was, but they never could figure out how. Here people aren't tested when they enter the races. But in order to get on a Quidditch team you have a thorough background check and physical tests. I could never pass them because I have metamorphmagus abilities."
"Actually," she paused for a second, her mind lost in thought. "I don't thing anyone with animagus abilities is allowed to play either. It's easier to hide the ability sometimes, but a thorough healer can find traces of it in your system. See, having animagus abilities can sometimes boost your abilities and that would make it unfair for other players. It doesn't happen all the time, but sometimes, it depends on how compatible you are with your animagus. I don't know much about it. Dumbledore would know ..." she stopped as Harry's face hardened.
"I know," she said, sounding if she could read Harry's mind, "but he does mean for the best. Sometimes I think that he really should understand that nothing goes as planned no matter how hard you try."
Harry didn't answer immediately and she fell silent as well, finally turning away from him when she couldn't bear looking into his pained eyes anymore. It took a while, but she managed to get him to slip an arm around her and pull close again. Both were thinking silently to themselves about what was coming, Harry more on what was going to happen tomorrow while Tonks was thinking further ahead.
"Harry," Tonks said quietly after they'd been laying there for a good hour without speaking. Harry felt an odd sensation pass down him, but he chose not to speak, instead feigning sleep. "If you're awake I just wanted to let you know something. I think that I..." she paused briefly, loosing the will it seemed. Harry couldn't breath, he couldn't move what he thought she might be saying was almost too much even for him to just lay there and listen to. "...that I never want to let you go," she continued finally, squeezing Harry tighter against her. He couldn't help it and pulled her arm tighter against him sighing.
•
There was no great ruckus when the doors opened. Harry was not given a horseless carriage to take. He and Tonks walked, the trunks floating behind them, to Hogwarts over the usual path that they took when returning from Hogsmeade.
In fact, other than the echoing of the door as it banged closed, the castle sounded amazingly empty. It was almost as if there were no other living things there at all.
They were only alone for a minute. It was not however anyone Harry wanted to see. "Snape," Harry growled under his breath. He couldn't help it, he hadn't planned on coming to Hogwarts to be with Snape. In fact, he hated it that Snape was there at all.
"What do you want?" Harry asked as the greasy haired teacher approached.
A furious smirk flashed on his face, but it was gone almost as quick replaced by his typical sneer. "Nymphadora you are no longer needed. Leave. And don't go and trip over the stairs, we wouldn't want Filch to have to clean up the blood," he said snidely, fingering his wand. He seemed to want to do something more to her but couldn't bring himself to do it.
Tonks took one last moment to squeeze Harry's hand before dropping it and then releasing the spells on Harry's trunk. "Be careful Harry," she whispered before looking up at Snape irritably and giving him a huge grin. "Have a good evening Snivellus," she said quietly, but loud enough for Snape to hear.
He fumed and his wand rose, but then he clenched his teeth and dropped it again. It looked as if it were taking ever ounce of strength not to curse her.
After the door had closed behind Tonks, Harry immediately wished that she had stayed. He hated being in this castle alone, and it was even worse that Snape was here. Hopefully he would disappear as soon as Harry had his things into his room. Harry wasn't even sure what Snape wanted, he hadn't gotten a response to the question.
"Follow me Potter," Snape growled, turning and heading up the hallway. Harry turned back to his trunks and started to perform a levitation charm on them, but as soon as they lifted into the air they fell flat again, Snape having blocked it. "You won't be needing those until later. Someone will take them to the tower for you."
Harry gaped at Snape, he was being even harsher than usual. Bambi was in one of those trunks and even though he doubted that the small drop would have hurt her he couldn't check because Snape would surely take her away.
"Move," Snape growled furious that Harry hadn't taken another step forward.
When Harry had finally taken a step forward, with a last glance at his trunks, he easily caught up to Snape even with his quick pace. "Where are we going?" Harry asked as nicely as possible. Snape wasn't exactly the easiest person to talk to.
There was no immediate comment, but Harry knew that they were headed in the direction of his room. "Are we going to Dumbledores office? I have some things I'd like to talk to him about."
Still no comment. Snape was either ignoring him purposefully or simply because he could. Harry didn't care either way, he just needed to speak to Dumbledore. If he was going to start using the Pensieve, he might as well start now, when nothing else was around to distract him. He also needed to discuss getting Occlumency lessons so that he could be around Tonks.
The arrived at the stone gargoyle and Snape muttered the password, trying to do it so that Harry could not hear, but Harry still caught the two words, Everlasting Gobstoppers. The gargoyle jumped out of the way revealing the ever moving staircase and Harry began to step onto it.
It was then that Snape decided to speak again. "School may not be in session at this time," he snarled. "But you will refer to me as Professor or Sir. Do you understand Potter?"
Smirking, Harry stepped onto the moving steps and then, just before he disappeared, as the gargoyle was moving back he smiled. "Yes sir, Professor Snivellus."
There was an angry remark but Harry didn't catch it all. He wasn't sure exactly what it had been, but he was sure it hadn't been something he would have wanted to hear. It came as a surprise to Harry that he didn't open the door and bound up the stairs, wand in hand. Harry would have liked to have had a reason to jinx him.
At the top of the stairs Harry knocked softly on the door, but entered immediately, believing Dumbledore would be expecting him if Snape had brought him here.
No one was in the office though. Fawkes sat on his perch, glistening beautifully in the light that entered the room. "Hello Fawkes," Harry said softly, taking a moment to stroke his beautiful feather coat. Fawkes chirped softly as Harry petted him.
He looked around, finding the room extremely familiar. The silver instruments whirring softly, emitting almost purring sounds. Harry turned his attention to the sorting hat. It would be used soon, and Harry wondered if it had created a song for this year, and if it had, what it would be like.
Harry looked to the portraits, a few of them were asleep, a few were missing, but a good number of them were staring down at him. He looked to one in particular, Phineas Nigellus. He wasn't there at all. Harry wasn't sure if it was because he'd just come in or because Phineas was visiting some other portrait.
"Harry!" Dumbledore said from a stairwell to the rear of his office. Harry had seen him come from it more than once, but never been there. Dumbledore seemed to be more than just a little happy which made Harry wary. "Please, come up here, I've got something I need to discuss with you."
Up the stairs, Harry found he was in a library of sorts. He was distracted for a minute, his eyes traveling along the titles of many of the books. Some of them really caught Harry's eye, and he wondered if later on Dumbledore might let him borrow a few. His mind fell back into place and he remembered that there were other things he needed to talk to Dumbledore about. Quidditch for one, he wanted to make sure that he was no longer banned – though he wasn't really worried about it. Then there was the DA. While he knew that none of the decrees were in effect anymore, but he still wanted to make sure that it was alright with Dumbledore to reform the DA.
"Harry, please sit down, there is only a few minute of time that we can use this potion," Dumbledore said, catching Harry buried in his thoughts.
Turning quickly Harry saw that there was a mug of potion on a table in the room being heated by a blue flame. "Potion?" he asked incredulously.
"Yes Harry," Dumbledore said quietly. "In light of the happenings of last year I buried myself in research, trying to determine a way to severe the connection you and Voldemort have." He paused, and Harry suddenly felt angry. Dumbledore no longer trusted him even to try and learn Occlumency, he was trying to do it without Harry's permission.
"Unfortunately there is little research on scars that connect two people and none on yours because, as you know, you were the first person on record to have ever survived the Avada Kedavra curse."
Of course, Harry though bitterly, he was special, so it didn't matter how much Dumbledore looked up – he wouldn't be able to find anything that would help him anyway.
Dumbledore didn't seem to see Harry's thoughts even though they were written plainly on his face, and continued. "After a thorough investigation into every possible approach, whether current spells, old magic, or magic only being experimented on, I found one spell that could possibly help," he paused and leaned forward, stirring the potion on the table.
"You've already felt its affects, staying in the room in Hogsmeade. It has also been placed on this room. I have tried the castle, but it appears to be just too vast to accommodate such a spell. This room has also been placed under it. I know that the spell doesn't last long, a few days at most, but I have placed it here so that we may be able to communicate without the intrusion of Voldemort."
"You've begun having nightmares again, haven't you?" Dumbledore asked quietly. Even though Harry knew he expected and answer Harry also knew that Dumbledore knew the truth.
"Not until just a few nights ago."
"Just around the time of your birthday?" Dumbledore prodded him, trying to get a very specific answer. Harry hated that he knew, and wondered if Tonks had told him. She certainly hadn't mentioned anything to him about hearing it.
Harry nodded absent mindedly while he thought about them.
"As I thought," Dumbledore said, his eyes dimmer than their usual twinkling self. Harry suddenly wondered if Tonks had told him anything. He didn't seem to be taking this from some fact he knew, but was speculating it all.
"Before your birthday," Dumbledore continued, "the two of you were far enough away from each other that the connection did not bother you. When Tonks took you away that stretched the connection to its limits. A few days prior to your return Voldemort left the country to seek out some... acquaintances, and only returned two days prior to your birthday."
The question of who the 'acquaintances' were was already on the tip of Harry's tongue, but he did not as it, Dumbledore would not tell him if he was already avoiding it.
"Around that time I devised another way to prevent Voldemorts intrusion on your mind. It depended a great deal on me being able to have close contact with you so I had to determine how well the blocking spell worked. Since it is very old magic I did not have any idea of how it would work. That is why you stayed at the room in Hogsmeade these past few days, in order for me to study it. Unfortunately, it breaks down rather quickly, a few days at most, but it is enough time to do what I needed. I trust you had no odd dreams while staying at Hogsmeade?"
This time Harry didn't nod immediately. There had been an odd dream, but he knew that it certainly hadn't had anything to do with Voldemort and anything he wanted. Rather, it was about Tonks, whip cream, strawberries, and some other sweets. It hadn't been a typical dream for him, but on the other hand he was not going to tell Dumbledore about that dream.
"No," Harry finally said, "not something that could have had anything to do with Voldemort."
Accepting the answer without question, Dumbledore continued. "Since I have found no way to block the attacks easily, the spell I used on the rooms is extremely complex; I decided to look for alternative ways of helping. It was then that I thought of another way. Occlumency is still the only known way in which I can help, so I began researching another possibility. If I were to transfer over memories of Occlumency, of rigorous training, then you should be able to learn from them instead of taking the normal route. After a good deal of research on my part I found that there was no record of anyone every trying such a spell. I do, however, believe it is quite plausible."
The idea wasn't completely ludicrous, Harry thought that it actually sounded like something that would likely work – but there was a problem with it. "But if you give some of your memories to me will you be able to remember what it is that you've given me?"
"Ah," Dumbledore said, smiling again. "You've spotted the predicament. There is however a way to overcome this difficulty. I have spent every available moment relearning Occlumency again. So, when I transfer over those specific memories I well still have the knowledge within me."
Harry understood that as well, but it wasn't something that comforted him, if Dumbledore did transfer over the memories what exactly would he be receiving? He looked at the potion that he was being asked to drink and he shivered. It looked like a pudding gone wrong, it was far from thin and runny like most of the potions, it was thick and chunky almost like soup – but from the foul smell there could be no mistaking that it was a potion.
"If I choose to do this," Harry began to ask, not giving a clear yes or no, he wanted to know more about it. "What exactly is going to happen? And what does the potion have to do with it? You said it was a spell." As he asked he prodded the top of the potion warily. It jumped out at his finger, trying to engulf it. Harry pulled back, startled, but when he turned to Dumbledore all he saw was a hearty smile.
"This potion is used to place the mind in a deep state of meditation. It has some extreme ingredients in it to help calm the mind, and even some poisons. We are lucky to have a potions master who can brew it," he said, and pointed to a scroll sitting on the table. Harry glanced at it, but turned back to Dumbledore, not really interested, he wanted to know what was going to happen exactly. The idea of being put into a state of deep meditation didn't mean much to him.
"You'll be awake in a sense, but your mind will be completely relaxed. You'll likely be able to do little in this state, and are very susceptible to outside influences – which is why I have protected the room so cautiously. I need you in this state so that when I transfer over memories they will not be rejected. I cannot afford to loose such memories if this does not work the first time."
After looking back to the potion (this time resisting the urge to poke it) Harry nodded. If this could help him learn Occlumency faster, then he was all for it. He reached over to pick up the but Dumbledore stopped him.
"There is one other thing," Dumbledore said before letting Harry drink. Harry stopped, his resolve faltering a little bit, he hated additions. "Since these memories are my memories and there's no mold to do this by, I am afraid I'm not sure how organized they will be. They may be incoherent, and even so much so that they make no sense. I doubt this possibility, but if this does not work it is only a small amount of time lost."
Though it wasn't something that was a huge difference Harry had to rethink taking it. Then he realized that it wouldn't matter if he did get some of the images jumbled, they shouldn't affect the rest of his memories. He nodded one last time and then quickly drained the mug trying to ignore the taste, but having a hard time with the texture. It almost felt as if he'd eaten life worms and they were wriggling down his throat.
Immediately Dumbledore stood again. "Please try not to think," he said, looking over Harry.
Harry had a hard time answering. The taste was so atrocious that Harry could barely breathe, let alone form words. He suppressed the urge to throw up and tried to sit up. Dumbledore shook his head. "You may rest here while I make the necessary preparations."
It felt as if the room swirled about, twisting and turning until it made him feel sick again. Even as he was laying down it felt as if he were standing up. Everything around him gained a slight fuzz to its edges, as if he were obscured through a sheet of ice. The walls disappeared, the floor disappeared, and it was as if the emptiness went on forever. The stretch between the couch Harry lay on and the table the seemed to sit on nothing had grown from just an arm stretch to miles.
Dumbledore returned again, not long afterwards, but the time passed strangely in Harry's mind. When Dumbledore approached his face, and the twinkling eyes, seemed oddly contorted. The disarmingness of it seemed to have disappeared and he looked like a clown, his hair making him even more laughable.
Finally Dumbledore took his seat on the table, pulling his wand from within his cloak. He seemed odd, and even in Harry's state he could tell that Dumbledore had not rested in a long time. His eyes, even though they twinkled, had dark bags under them. He whispered a spell, but to Harry it was obscured and much more like a squeak. Harry had barely enough sense to listen to it at all.
Then, the world change again, the time changed again and, as if Harry were in a memory, Harry saw himself laying on the couch. It was odd, staring at himself, even odder than when he had traveled in time. It felt just like he'd entered into a Pensieve of what was currently happening.
He was laying there, on the couch, one arm had fallen from his chest and was hanging down. The other was across his stomach, as if it were holding in the bile he was still trying to hold down. Dumbledore was sitting over him, staring down, with a mild smile. He tapped his wand to his head, whispering something mutely, and then pulled it away. A long stream of silver liquid slowly slipped from his head, as if there were an invisible hole it came from.
At first it was a thin string, silver and liquid like. It quivered slightly, as if it were trying to stay in place, but then snapped like a rubber band and hung from the wand like a plump silver snail that stretched bobbed a little with the slightest wand movement.
Then, a few seconds after it was completely exposed to the air, it began to shrink, as if it were drying up. However, after it had decreased to half its size Dumbledore moved his wand to Harry's head, tapping it with the attached silver strand. The strand, which had seemed to be almost dried out, burst to life again, easily taking it's previous plump form. After it had finally filled again, it slowly slid, as if there were another invisible hole, into Harry's head.
After repeating the process two dozen times, Dumbledore finally sat down, looking weak, and Harry felt sick again. He opened his eyes to find that he was still lying on the couch, but the room was normal again. Dumbledore was in a chair across from him, and he was making light wheezing sounds. It seemed he had fallen asleep.
The throbbing in Harry's head ebbed almost as quickly as he had awoken from the dream like state, and he sat up straight balancing himself. He heard Fawkes making a cooing sound and a rush of memories knocked him to the ground, it was as if someone had pounded them into his head with a jack hammer. Little of it made sense, and none of it seemed to be anything pertaining to Occlumency.
At first there was a memory of running from a rickety old horse carriage that was out of control. No one was at the wheel, nor was a horse pulling it, but it seemed to be chasing Harry all along the dirt roads and even followed him off until he'd run through a stream where it was stopped dead.
Then there was a flash of an incident with a milkman. He had been jinxing the floor mat to sweep out under the one's foot when the stepped on it, but the milkman had surprised him and walked away with orange hair. It wasn't purposeful, and he hadn't even been using his wand at the time, but Harry found it extremely funny.
It wasn't his emotions though, it was a memory, and Harry knew it wasn't his memory, but everything was there, the smell of the morning air, the ripple of the wind as it rushed passed him, the startled feeling of someone coming up on him. It was odd, having memories that weren't his own. They were so vivid, even more vivid than anything he remembered himself. What was the most disturbing was that he felt as if he were the person in the memory, it wasn't like seeing another's memories, they had become his own and for all intents and purposes he had been there and done it. He'd been the one to jinx the milkman and get runoff by the carriage.
There was another, a brief moment between he and another boy, his hair already grayed as if he was old, but his body looking no older than fifteen. He had a devilish smirk that rivaled Snape's in Harry's mind and he seemed to have done something supremely wrong. Harry had helped hide him as two adults had come looking. The boy had been happy, and thought it mildly funny that he hadn't been caught. Harry did not remember what had been done though and so he just ignored the odd feeling of wrongdoing he'd had.
The memories finally faded, the bulk of Harry's headache following suite. When Harry finally pushed them aside and sat up again Fawkes cooed once more and more memories rushed into his mind that moment. This time he fell back on the couch, having just a bit more control over himself before it happened.
There was a dark man, with sallow skin, bit a warm smile, teaching him things. Kerner, that was his name, and he seemed familiar, more than just a memory. His eyes were odd, and Harry could never actually decide on a color. But they sparkled and seemed to catch his attention every time he looked at them. He was patient and understand, but pushed Harry hard to learn.
Day by day he taught Harry, over and over again. They went over each step of the control, the clearing of the mind, the ability to feel an attempted intrusion, and how to block it. It was odd, suddenly finding himself full of memories he didn't have. However, his mind used them moment to moment as he saw them. They integrated themselves in, giving Harry the overwhelming feeling of knowing how to stop an intruder and how to push himself into another mind. He didn't just remember how to use Occlumency, he knew everything there was to know about it, and it was instinctual for him to build a barrier around his mind even before the memories ceased.
Other memories came to him as the Occlumency training continued. Of flying alongside a biplane. Then of a strange car-like vehicle that he gawked over and tried to discover how to use. A beautiful girl in a park, picking flowers with him. Meeting Fawkes for the first time. So many memories were projected into his head that when they finally stopped flowing Harry sat bolt upright, and puked. It was as if he'd been traveling hundreds of miles an hour scenes flashing by him continuously.
When he looked up it was to Dumbledore, who was standing over him, a look of concern on his face.
"Are you alright Harry?" he asked softly.
Nodding, Harry found he was on the couch, his mess all over the floor. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, reaching for his wand to clean it up. Dumbledore smiled brighter but still seemed concerned. Then with a wave of his own the mess was gone. Harry closed his eyes as the rest of the memories faded from his immediate attention. "Yes," he answered, his voice still soft. "I think... I think that it worked."
The concern evaporated instantaneously on Dumbledore's face, replaced by a look of ecstasy. Harry had never come across Dumbledore with such a look. He could do nothing but smile, it wasn't the sort of smile that Dumbledore usually had, but this one made Harry happy just because it existed.
It happened without Harry's knowledge or permission. He was sitting there, his head already pounding, and he didn't see Dumbledore flick his wand that was behind his head. He felt it though, instantly, Dumbledore trying to push into his mind. It wasn't like when Snape had done it, this time Harry knew exactly what was happening and he could feel it as Dumbledore pressed past the newly erected outer barriers of his mind.
Harry gritted his teeth, and focused, his whole mind spiraling around the intrusion. He found a place, an empty place, and there he was, standing in a prairie, rolling hills around him and white clouds drifting lazily overhead. Dumbledore was standing across from him, looking around startled.
"Where is this place?" Dumbledore asked, looking around. "Is it something you remember?"
Harry looked around, and he knew where it was. He remembered being there, riding his broomstick to the lone tree in the far distance. "It's a memory now, I've been here and I haven't. I never owned a Comet 240, but you have, haven't you?"
Dumbledore smiled, remembering some far memory. "It was the fastest broom at the time. I could keep up with the newly design airplanes. Always got myself into trouble though. Mother was always afraid the ministry would remove me from school." Then he paused and he remembered where he was and what was happening. It was as if, before that moment, he had not himself, and unable to control what he said.
The connection broke instantly. "I'm sorry for that Harry," Dumbledore apologized. "I just had to be sure. You've had other memories transferred as well then?" he asked cautiously.
Angrily Harry nodded and stood. "Yes," Harry said angrily. He found that both of his wands were still in there proper place and he didn't want to hang around the office for another minute, what Dumbledore had done to him was more than he wanted to deal with. After stabilizing himself Harry moved quickly to the exit of the office. Dumbledore's opinion of what he should be doing right now didn't matter to him, in fact he was suddenly much angrier with Dumbledore even though he couldn't pinpoint why.
As he marched outside the door the whole world seemed smaller. He hurried down the hall, his robes billowing behind him with the unnatural wind that was associated with the storms. Apparently, even Hogwarts could not withstand them completely.
Snape was waiting for him, as if he knew Harry would be showing up. "I take it the potion worked?" he sneered as Harry turned the corner nearing the common room. Harry didn't answer, but instead ignored Snape completely. "Potter!" he growled as Harry passed by him.
"Professor Snivellus?" Harry asked innocently as he stopped, looking to Snape. "Why don't you go ask the headmaster? I'd rather not speak to you unless I'm required to, and unless my memory serves me wrong I can not get into your class because I only got an E on my Potions O.W.L.s. So, unless you enjoy talking to me I don't plan on speaking to you at all this year."
"I thought, Potter," Snape growled, obviously doing everything he could to maintain composure, "that you would not give up so easily on the juvenile goal of becoming an Auror."
Before he lost his head Harry started to continue past Snape, he didn't want to try and curse him because he knew it wouldn't work out in his favor if he did. Snape had different plans and grabbed a hold of him by the shoulder, but didn't hold it for long, there was a slight popping sound and Snape yanked it back as if he'd just received a terrible burn.
Without noticing what he'd done, Harry turned on Snape. "Well Sir Snivellus, apparently an Auror, even a clumsy one, can get the better of you." He shouted. "I've hard about the little mar on you body. Does it make you feel better, knowing that even a drunken Auror can get the best of you?"
The look Harry received said he'd pushed it to far. In an instant both of the wizards had wands out and curses were shouted. Harry's shield was barely strong enough to repel the body bind curse and it knocked him backwards a few steps. By the time he'd waved his wand to curse Snape again he felt his legs snap together. As he fell he heard another curse muttered and he rolled out of the way, using the moment he had to loose the binding curse.
He ducked behind a nearby statue as yet another curse flew passed him and Harry groaned. Snape was a fully trained wizard, and from what he'd heard Sirius say the previous year, quite adept at curses.
Harry moaned at his snide comment, he hadn't even meant to say it, it had just slipped out. Now he was in a position that was as bad, if not worse, than he'd been in the previous year. He was less afraid of the death eaters than he was of Snape.
"Come on Potter. Show me that legendary Gryffindor bravery," he snarled. Harry shivered, he'd never seen Snape so mad.
Moaning softly at his stupidity, Harry tried to form some sort of idea in his mind. He could really use Hermione right now, she's be able to give him ideas. Or Tonks... and then it came to him, he needed to catch Snape off guard, and Tonks had shown him a way to do it. He hadn't even practiced it yet, but she had shown him how to do it and maybe, just maybe he could.
Breathing slowly, listening for Snapes footsteps, Harry focused, trying to recall the exact incantation. Se... Se duplicas, duplicus... Harry repeated the words in his head. The word was at the tip of his tongue, but he couldn't seem to remember the exact incantation.
The sound of Snape's footfalls got Harry thinking more about what was happening at the moment. The hallway was fairly clear, there was the statue he was behind, Gertude the Ghastly. Another one was directly across from it Favion the Ferret who was staring at Gertude with some sort of lustful look. Harry smiled as he flicked his wand.
"Wingardium Leviosa," he whispered ever so silently. He was doing he best to keep Snape from hearing what was going on. The statue began to rise but Harry dropped his wand, willing it to stay near the ground. It quit moving, only centimeters above the ground, enough for Harry to see under it. Hopefully Snape hadn't caught the movement.
Still the footfalls came closer, Harry concentrated, his mind split on two separate things, the charm he had cast, and how else he could get away from Snape. There was a secret passage not far, but it was one of the more known ones and Harry was sure Snape would know of it.
He was going to have to face Snape directly.
There was one more step before Harry acted. He moved first, making sure Snape saw it. Then he pulled back again, avoiding the stunning spell that was headed towards him instantly. He concentrated and then, crunching up into a ball sprang into the center of the hall. He located Snape's position and then, with a flick of his wand sent the second statue hurtling towards Snape.
Without waiting to see if the statue struck Snape Harry w already on his feet, headed towards an area he knew better. As he rounded the corner down the hall there was an explosion that rocked the building and he was sire that Favion the Ferret was no more. It didn't matter though, he needed to get to a place where he had an advantage. Ascending the stairs, Harry found himself entering the doorway that led to the third floor hallway and he paused. While Snape wasn't far behind he was still out of site.
"Se duplici," Harry bellowed, suddenly remembering the incantation that Tonks had told him. From his wand burst a boy who looked like a ghostly Harry. He stood there, smiling but didn't move. Unfortunately Harry didn't know how Tonks had made her duplicate move.
The pounding of Snape's feet caught Harry's attention and he dashed up the hall and into the darkness. Not a single torch lit and Harry found himself hiding in the shadows. Snape slowed as he came to the base of the stairs, seeing Harry just beyond the top. "Do not play games with me Potter," he snarled, taking the steps slowly, his wand held high.
Snape's lip curled as he neared the top of the steps, Harry could see him clearly, his dark eyes focused on the clone. He raised his wand and Harry raised his as well, wondering if the ghost was going to trick Snape for much longer.
It didn't work at all. Snape must have known that it wasn't him, he came rushing up and sent a spell hurtling towards the copy of Harry. But, just before striking, it turned sharply and Harry's eyes widened as it turned directly on him. He'd never seen a spell change direction in mid air and hadn't been expecting it.
"Protego!" Harry shouted as the spell got nearer, but his shield charm was not enough and he felt a warm presence slip over him. It wasn't bad though, and it wasn't as if someone were trying to control him, it was like he was stronger and faster.
It occurred to him that he could beat Snape, all he had to do was bind him. In the shadows it was hard to see a spell unless it was considerably strong, but even an easy petrification curse would hold Snape for a few seconds which would be enough for Harry to place a second, more powerful one upon him. All he had to do was keep the intensity down a little so that it didn't go brightly.
Harry took a step forward so that if he need to fall back he had a step or two before he hit the wall, and then raised his wand.
"Wrong move Potter," he heard Snape say and then he tripped forward, crashing to the ground. The Snape that was standing on the stairs disappeared into thin air and Harry gasped. "You think a silly Aurors trick will work on me?" Snape asked, his voice coming out of seemingly thin air. "I know more about Aurors than you'll ever know Potter. Something like that will not work on me, especially when it's as feeble as it was.
Harry's eyes roamed the corridor, trying to find his wand, it was tottering at the top of the stairwell, ready to begin its descent down.
It wasn't any help to Harry though, as Snape was there suddenly. He didn't move into the position, he just appeared in thin air as if he'd apparated. Harry was dumbstruck, even Tonks couldn't use the invisibility spell on herself. She said that only a few of the Aurors could. The only other person Harry knew could use it was Dumbledore, and he only suspected it, he'd never seen it actually used.
"Apparently that little harlot taught you a few tricks. I wonder if she did other things..." he paused, and evil sneer spreading across his face. "Let's find out, shall we?"
He raised his wand, sealing the door near the bottom of the hallway. It occurred to Harry then that, although Snape and Dumbledore had been the only people he'd seen in the castle, that others might be around. Their scuffle would have caught more than one persons attention.
"Legilimens!" Snape barked loudly. Harry was struck hard with the charm, even harder than he had with Dumbledore, and he felt the weight of the charm wash over him. It was difficult, but this time instead of sending himself to some distant place he did not know, he found himself remembering the Cruciatus curse and all the pain. He pushed himself to that place, making it the only memory that Snape could touch, he didn't want to block Snape, he wanted to hurt him for all the years of pain he'd suffered because of the lousy git.
Snape screamed, and Harry felt the connection breaking. He was aware of the world outside of the memory and he pulled his secondary wand from his pocket, and pointed it at Snape. "Accio."
His wand flew from Snape's pocket, where it was being held and Harry grabbed it with his open hand. Then, not wanting to suffer Snape's wrath once again, he turned back and headed down the hallway, his whole body aching from the curse.
He came to a split and his mind told him to go down the left path which he didn't waste an instant thinking about even though he'd never been there before. Snape's pain didn't last long though, he stood again, racing after Harry.
"What have we here?" someone asked as Harry turned down a dark corridor. He wasn't sure exactly where he was, but the voice was a welcome sign, it meant that Snape was not going to try and hurt him. There was an odd sound to the voice, and a familiarity that Harry couldn't pinpoint. He couldn't see the person either, they were engulfed in the darkness of the hall.
The pounding of Snape rushing into the hall stopped. He'd heard the voice to. "Good morning Severus," the voice called almost cheerfully. "Reacquainting yourself with all the passages? I thought we'd discussed that this area was offlimits to everyone but me."
Harry turned to Snape, and had an eerie feeling that he'd heard the voice before. He saw a malicious glittering in Snape's eyes and wondered who the man was, he certainly didn't get along with Snape very well. It was odd, most of the teachers got along fairly well even if it was only an act. That was, accept for Moody who had hated Snape.
"Harry was just trying to prove he was better at dueling," Snape said, venting his anger. "Though I doubt a student could ever beat a teacher here. They always have such lofty dreams."
"Well I'm sure they do, but it is our job to teach them how to succeed in their dreams, is it not? Why don't you leave Harry here, I'd like to speak with him." The voice said jauntily, and Harry was happy to see that it ticked Snape off even more. He'd gotten away this time, but until school started he was going to have to be careful about wandering the castle.
Snape stomped off, ever footstep making Harry feel better and better. "Thanks Professor," he said as he turned to the shadow, assuming that by the way the voice had spoken it was a professor.
"Hadwin, Professor Hadwin if you'd like. But you can call me Wendel if you'd prefer. Since we met outside of the school I don't believe we must be formal, I don't like being in a position of forced respect. That should be a choice."
As Harry's mind reeled he stepped into the dark. He could see Hadwin positioned up against a far wall, his wand positioned between his legs and standing straight in the air. Hadwin's hand was several inches from touching it at all, and nothing else was touching it either. It was odd because the rough walls were fall from flat enough to hold a wand, even a perfectly balanced one.
"This time I have my wand. You see," he said soothingly his hands staying stock still above the wand. "I thought it might perhaps be useful should there be a conflict between a student and a teacher in my hallway."
"You were at the top of the clock tower," Harry finally was able to say. "You were the nutter that jumped off."
"Not unlike jumping off a broom in mid air, though I believe that it's a much shorter distance."
Harry's eyes widened. "How did you know about that?"
Hadwin smiled. "The mind is such an interesting tool," he continued in his warm, soothing voice.
It was then that Harry noted that in the few moments they'd stared at each other Hadwin had already entered past the first barrier of his mind, and was slipping past the second. It was an odd feeling, the way he was doing it, and Harry didn't recognize it, but knew what was happening.
"Get out!" he shouted, focusing his mind to get rid of the intrusion and tearing his eyes away from Hadwins unblinking gaze. It hurt a little, focusing so much but the intrusion stopped and Hadwin slipped out just a slippery as he'd slipped in. He was smiling in the corner and Harry clenched his wand tightly. "Why did you do that?" he demanded, ready to curse the teacher.
The smile went unfazed. "Oh come now Harry, I am very aware of what just happened over the last two days. I was just curious as to how well it worked."
"Two days?" Harry questioned, his tone changing completely. "I was in Dumbledore's office for two days?"
"Well yes," Hadwin said, looking a little baffled. "Didn't Dumbledore explain that the process was not an easy thing? It took a great deal of time to sort out those memories in your mind, I should say there's a great deal of things in there."
"You were in my mind?" he demanded again. Dumbledore had mentioned that the potion left his mind vulnerable to others but hadn't said he was going to allow another person to enter his mind before the potion wore off.
"Oh yes, quite in interesting place if I do say so. I haven't come across a mind so torn with ideals since I met Wesley Phelps. Died early on in his life though, a sad loss, he would have been one of the greats."
"What did you do in there?" Harry said, angry that he'd been entered without his permission and swearing he was never going to let Dumbledore play with him again.
"Only organized your thoughts. That was the only reason I was called in, the only reason I saw as much as I did was because there was a lack of order and a great deal of foreign thoughts that wandered around in your mind. I was quite surprised, I've never seen anything quite like it until Dumbledore decided to try that experiment on you."
Hadwin had barely moved at all and his smile was utterly annoying. Knowing he wasn't going to get any happier standing around Harry turned and stomped the other direction. "Passwords bellator."
So, troubled that so many people had been trying to get into his head, Harry marched straight to the common room, ignoring the few teachers whose faces appeared in doors as he passed by.
•