Chapter 7.3
A Friend and Protector

That familiar whisper wove in and out of his dreams. Dreams filled with flashes of different colors; and faces whose features were hidden by a fog. And then nothing but fire…..

Angel awoke, light from the hallway shining across his face and two men walking into the bedroom.

"Ginny, go get some sleep. You have been up all night. I will watch over him for a while. I need to talk to him this morning, anyway."

"Thank you Professor Lupin. I could use a bit of sleep. Wake me up if he needs anything." And Ginny left the room, closing the door behind her.

The early morning rays shone thru the windows, dimly lighting the figures of Professor Lupin and a man with very long red-blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail. They stood a few yards away and were talking so quietly that Angel couldn't hear them. He closed his eyes and concentrated, trying to make out anything, but to no avail.

After a few minutes, they began walking towards the bed, the conversation seemed to be getting louder as well. Angel kept his eyes closed, not wanting them to know he was awake, hoping to overhear.

" No Fault, Lupin! No Fault," said the red haired man sternly.

"It is my fault," answered Lupin. "I left my post."

"We all left our posts! We were tricked, all of us."

"But I was so far away. What was I thinking?"

"You were tricked! We were tricked! Even Rufus! When he tried to scare the boy back to the house, he led him right to the enemy. It was almost as if voldemort had choreographed everything."

They moved to the head of the bed and Angel could feel them staring.

The red haired man continued, "We almost lost the boy….voldemort almost had his next victim, wiping out the Order, one by one."

Lupin's voice broke slightly, "When I heard the fight, I knew immediately what I had done. I knew what was happening."

"Lupin, your howl went through the brothers as if pierced by silver arrows." Pausing briefly, the red haired man continued, "I still do not understand why the boy was out so late."

"I don't know. We expected him long before. I should have done something."

"And you expect you could have helped Lupin? What could you have done that close to sundown?"

The red-haired man paused and seemed to look through Angel. Then continued.

"No blame, Lupin! No blame!……

….I would expect the Order no longer needs me then. The boy looks to be in no condition…"

Lupin interrupted, "He is healing well. It has only been postponed. We will need you again."

Lupin and the red-haired man put their hands on each other's shoulders.

"Thank you Odin. As always, I am in your debt."

"It was an honor to work beside you, brother."

"I will be in touch when you are needed."

The door opened, shining on Angel's face and then closed, leaving Lupin and Angel alone.

Lupin walked to the bed, looking intently at Angel. "Sirius…I'm here Sirius…," he whispered to himself, almost as if dreaming. He was startled to see Angel's eyes open.

"Professor Lupin, what about Sirius?"

"I am so happy to see you again Angel, though the circumstances could have been better." As he looked into Angel's eyes, it was as if looking into Siri's. Siri's eyes. He was transfixed for a few moments, unable to say anything.

Finally he began, "You remind me so much of Sirius. Not exactly, but so much." He took a breath and continued, "I always suspected that you were in some way related, but the pure-bloods are all related……

…….I did not know until recently. Cassie never told me." Then, tightening his jaw a bit, "And Sirius never did either. It was a very well kept secret."

"You cannot imagine my delight to find out you are a member of the Black family, a blood tie. Black blood flows through you. Although I have very little affection for the family, aside from Cassie, you are the closest blood tie to your grandfather, the closest to Sirius."

Lupin then looked around the room, "Since your mother wants nothing to do with the Black family, suffice it to say, in Sirius' absence this house is yours."

After a few minutes, Lupin spoke again in an even voice, a voice very similar to what he used in class.

"Angel,we have a few other things to talk about." Lupin reached into a pocket of his sleeve and pulled out a small tin. The piece of candy he removed looked very similar to a lemon drop, only black. "Put this under your tongue. It will help."

Angel felt better, though still on fire, he was less nauseous and the stinging subsided.

Then from under his robe. Professor Lupin pulled out a kidney shaped flask. "This will help with the scars. Will you allow me to apply a bit?"

Angel nodded. Lupin folded down the sheet revealing Angel's chest. His eyes moved slowly, almost appraisingly between Angel's scars and burn. Taking a deep breath, Lupin looked as if he was making a decision, nodding slightly to himself, but saying nothing. After a few mintues, Lupin 'snapped out of it.'

"Come on Angel, you need to sit up and bit. Can't lie here any longer, need to move these muscles. I am sorry Angel, but if you don't move about now, it will only get worse." With help, Angel was soon sitting on the side of the bed, Lupin next to him, applying the medicine.

"Angel, your mother has discussed her life at Hogwarts? Her friends, those she was closest to?"

Angel nodded.

"Good, good." And his voice trailed off as he seemed at a loss for the exact words to say. "I knew your mother as a close friend then and we renewed our friendship when she returned from Australia. We had both lost those who were very close. Your mother was concerned about what would happen to you if she was unable to care for you. She wanted to be able to choose your godparents, to have you looked after by someone she picked. Well, I would imagine that her first choices would have been Sirius or James, but as James had been killed and Sirius was in Azkaban, that was impossible….. I was delighted and honored that she even thought to ask me and I jumped at the chance….."

Lupin paused, trying to discern Angel's reaction, but Angel wasn't going to give him that satisfaction. Again anger was welling up inside him, anger at Lupin, anger at his mother, anger at Dumbledore, and anger at Sirius. Did everyone know something important about him that they were keeping secret? And why hadn't Sirius let him know? Why?

He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, trying hard not to scream.

"I am sorry Angel. I know that this is very hard, finding out in this way. I hoped that Cassie would have told you, but it doesn't surprise me that she hasn't. "

Angel clenched his fists in fury. He didn't know why but he felt like pounding them against the headboard, hurling every object in the room. Lupin's calm, caring voice made it worse. Angel's rage seemed to come from the deepest part of him, traveling through every muscle and bubbling over. He was sweating and shaking. He opened his eyes and stared at Lupin, looking for the slightest hint of worry or surprise in Lupin's face. He wanted to attack him!

Lupin quickly sat down on the bed and held Angel's arms still. "And I am here as your godfather. Angel, I care for you more than almost anyone in the world. We will sit here together or we can get up and walk. In either case you will listen to what I say. Do you understand me?"

Angel nodded.

Lupin put his arm around Angel's waist and helped him stand. They walked slowly around the room, Lupin holding Angel, more than just for support, Lupin gave Angel someone to lash out against, pushing against Lupin or pulling away as emotion hit him. Lupin held him tightly, treating this as something normal. The rage abated and Angel regained control of himself. As the anger lessened, Angel felt a strange new feeling towards Lupin. It was similar to affection. But it wasn't affection, it was a closeness, a bond.

His godfather seemed to understand what Angel was feeling, as if he had just felt it himself. This feeling had left Angel disturbingly quieted and content. And when Lupin began to talk again, his voice felt soothing.

"You are doing fine. Your muscles are strong and there were no bones broken. How are you feeling?"

"OK. I feel OK."

"No aches or pains, no nausea? I am surprised. Are you sure?"

And even though he would rather have kept it to himself, Angel felt compelled to tell him. "My insides feel very weird. It is hard to explain, almost as if my veins were burning, boiling: but not really that. Can veins be nauseous? And I am feeling the urge to dig out what is inside, to bleed it out; whatever 'it' is." He leaned his head against Lupins shoulder and they continued to walk.

"Yes, it has started……. Angel, you must be aware of what bit you in the alleyway."

Angel nodded slightly.

"And you are aware of the consequences of such a bite."

His heart was screaming a warning. He didn't want to hear it. He already knew, but he didn't want to hear it. No longer calm, his emotions changed back and forth as if on a pendulum. He pulled against Lupin with all his strength, but to no avail. Lupin would not release his hold on Angel and Lupin was stronger.

"When a werewolf bites, the wolf's saliva mixes with the blood of the victim. If the victim lives after the bite, their blood will contain the essence of the saliva. They will become a werewolf."

"That burning inside is the infection from the bite taking its place in your body. It is a relatively slow process, not being fully complete until after next full moon."

"Liam told me about Luna's charm. You were wearing it when you were bitten. I am guessing that it was glowing as the werewolf approached, but you were unaware of it. This charm detects werewolves. If one is near, the metal will glow, yet it will not hurt the wearer. But if it touches a werewolf's skin it will burn."

"At first, your transformation was not far enough along for the charm to detect it. But it seems that it has since progressed. It will continue to progress. There is no way that I know to stop it, but I will be here to help you get through."

Lupin loosened his grip and Angel jerked away. Tears were flowing from his eyes as he screamed louder than ever before. He threw everything he could get his hands on and when there was nothing else to throw, he pulled the covers from the bed onto the floor. Dropping to his knees he pounded the floor as hard as he could. Lupin made no attempt to stop this rampage. Only when Angel knelt face to the floor, trembling, did Lupin step in.

Against his better judgement, Lupin sat next to Angel on the floor. He lifted him up to a sitting position and put his arms around him, rocking him. Although Angel would not usually have allowed this, it felt natural. Soon Angel's trembling was replaced by silence and they quietly sat.