Chapter 14

Things grew quiet in the McRea house after Colt and Jamie had made up from their fight. All the kids seemed to be in their own worlds of thought and didn't seem as though they wanted to be disturbed at the moment. John had gone to his room to study, Anna in her room to do the same while Jeremy settled with just calming down and eating a bowl of ice cream at the kitchen table.

Colt took this as his chance to go out with 'Lissa so the two could talk for a while. Jamie was hesitant, but eventually agreed to it after her husband decided to side with his second son. Colt could only thank him with his eyes as not to tick Jamie off any further.

Neilissa chose to drive since Colt wasn't comfortable borrowing the car from his new parents just yet. The moment the two of them were out of the drive way and good distance away from the house Colt let out a loud yell, throwing his hands up into the air as high as they could go with the low car roof over his head. Liss gave him a sympathetic glance before returning her eyes to the road.

The frustrated teen was silent a moment while he let his temper calm down. "It's just so damn frustrating, you have no idea!" It sounded as though he were snapping at the McRae's themselves as the words barked from his mouth.

"Tell me about it, there are too many people parking against the curb in this neighborhood." His friend commented in a teasing manner.

Colt just looked at her sideways then shook his head with a smile. "You're not helping any."

"I know, I'm sorry." Lissa used her instructors voice on him. He knew he was in for a lecture, but the tone was so nice and familiar that he just didn't care right now. He would have begged for something from his old life no matter how bad he had thought it before. Sam to yell at him because he didn't mow the lawn. Jessica to call him sweetie while she asked him in her commando tone to have a seat for a 'your father is right' speech. And Rocky, oh how he missed Rocky and his little king of reasoning speeches. And Rum was always good for his ego, when he goes through his 'just like you' phases.

"I'm taking you on this drive so that you can cool off." Lissa explained. "Aaand, I know you'd want to read what your family wrote to you without interruptions."

"That's assuming I had the foresight to bring them." He teased right back from before. Grinning at the raised eyebrow from his friend.

"You didn't?" She began.

Colt reached into his back pocket. "Of course not. I just like to watch your eyebrow do that thing." The young woman blushed keeping her focus on the road. Colt smirked right back at her, knowing what she was thinking. He thought a lot about it himself. That night they almost became a little more than friends when he was deciding whether or not he wanted to confront his parents with what he had found out about his past. But right now was not the time to explore options when he had a little piece of his old family- his real family in his hands. Which one to read first? He wondered.

The car pulled to a stop next to a quiet park. Street lights were beginning to come on now, filing the sky with a slight tint of an orange glow because there was such a short distance before the next light it gave darkness little space to squeeze itself into. Three large trees blocked full view of an empty little play area. But it didn't matter, the pair wasn't exactly there for the view.

Glad for more than enough light to see so that they wouldn't have to turn on the over head, Colt decided on Tum's letter choosing it to be the one with the least to say. His little brother was never one for writing, unlike Rocky who could write a full eight pages to one person for a letter in a matter of minutes. It was strange considering Rock' never really seemed to do much in a day, Colt just assumed he had a secret night life that he was dying to tell someone about- which is why he adopted so many pen- and internet pals.

Neilissa reached beside the drivers seat to the glove compartment pulling out a small knife for which Colt figured was for protection. "Thanks." He offered in a weak tone. He almost couldn't bare to do it now that he was finally here. "Ha, this feels about as comfortable as getting your teeth pulled without Novocain." The usually cool teen tried making light of the uncomfortable situation.

Lissa watched Colt's face carefully, before offering. "...I can wait outside if you'd like?"

"Huh? Oh," he laughed lightly. "No, I should... I'm fine. Please stay."
It was almost said too sadly for her not to stay even he had told her to go. Placing a hand to his shoulder the teacher gave it a comforting squeeze. "Just know... I'm here for you."

"I know. Thanks."

Sliding out the sheet of paper, Colt unfolded the tight little pieces of paper that is his little brothers trade mark of annoyance. He tended to fold things in the oddest manner until you couldn't take it anymore and just ended up throwing the thing away. The little rebel in training claims he made it up but Colt had caught him many a days practicing the technique because he learned it from a friend at school. But enough side pedaling.

Dear Colt,

Hi. Everything here is good and…. No, I can't lie. This whole thing sucks! I've never seen mom and dad so upset, especially mom... She's been crying almost every night that I stayed up because, I couldn't sleep thinking about you and this whole thing blocks out the fact that I'm tired. (He scratched something out)

Do you know how its been since I've eaten a full meal! I guess... what I'm really saying is... we miss you Colt. It's not fair that this happened? Why would you do this to your real family? Are you mad at us? Did Rocky tick you off on the way home that day- was it me! You seemed fine when you first came here so it must be me right?

Colt... I hope your new family treats you right and... and maybe lets you visit... Oh never mind. I hate you! I hate you!

Colt frowned feeling tears fall down his face. That was it... every day he was gone from his old family and they had a problem they began to hate him. Blame him for things... How could they...? The note lowered from Colts hand, landing on his lap and with it the last chip in his nervous system. He began to cry.

Neilissa, who was watching the whole sad scene reached over to comfort the boy but he pulled away from her grip. Getting out of the car he bolted across the park barely looking to see exactly where he was going. He just knew he had to run.

"Jeffrey! Jeffrey!" Lissa called after him, but to no avail he was out of ear shot.

Colt ran as far as he could not stopping to catch even half a breath as he belted past a set of benches and trees, swings and see-saws. Finally Colt's body gave before his spirit and he collapsed to his knees catching himself with his hands before he went all the way down to the cement sidewalk. His breaths came out hard in a pant.

Is this what it feels like to have a panic attack? Or is it asthma? No that can't be, I've never had asthma before a day in my life- so maybe hyperventilation. While Colt wrestled with his thoughts as to why his body refused to remember how to breathe his former teacher walked casually up behind him, crouching down to be right beside him.

"Jeffrey?" She placed a hand onto the gasping boys back. "Deep breaths, okay?" Neilissa's hand patted gently upon Colt's back.

"They're miserable. All of them... they're all faking me out with all these cheerful little letters and low and behold Tum Tum tells me the truth..." He wiped his eyes falling back onto his butt for a better sitting position. "They hate me for what I did... I don't blame them."

Neilissa frowned pulling a tissue from her pocket wiping the small bits of gravels from Colt's face that he rubbed onto himself without knowing it. "You don't know that... Did you read the other letters?"

"Do I need to? I know what they all say... Hold on Colt. We all miss you very much but be strong, we'll give you some of our strength- shit like that and I'm not in the mood for it." He slowly shook his head. "Sad to know that my little brother is the only one who cares enough about me to give me the truth, guess they didn't count on the kids mouth."

"Don't talk about your family like that... they need you to be strong so that they can be strong themselves- Colt they don't hate you, they're just beside themselves with grief over losing you- I know I've been by your house. I see the way your brother is at school he's miserable!" She shouted the last part. "If that's hatred towards you than I must have missed something in translation."

Colt seemed unmoved as he closed his eyes looking as though he were trying to tune her out with meditation. "If those notes say that they aren't sad or putting up a front than that means you're the one who hates them... Maybe you're mad that they didn't fight hard enough to keep you- maybe you're even trying to say they hate you so that you don't have to miss them but whatever the reason I'm sure it was just pure frustration at the whole situation."

"Plain as day... I hate you... I hate you.." He handed her the note. She glanced over it but shook her head. "This is a boy near tears who wants you to be happy but the thought of it upset him... That's all..."

Colt rose to his feet, head down as he started back to the car. "I wanna go home."

Neilissa shrugged. In all her years of knowing Colt she had never seen his stubborn streak this strong... Well... maybe not never...

Rocky lay in bed at the dorm he shared at the L.A. college. The lights were turned out, the room only lit by the moonlight shinning into the window. Rocky's solemn face shown pale blue in the light as a frown began to take over his features. He didn't exactly want to be at school, but he had no other choice, sad or not he didn't need to let this thing with his family take over his life. He couldn't!

But still, something was nagging him in the back of his mind- some missing piece to this odd puzzle their family seemed to get mixed up in and he had to find answers... and the first place to start getting them was obvious. Aunt Sabrina.

Sitting up, he dropped his feet to the side of the bed. Quietly standing as to not wake up his sleeping new roommate Ethan, since Colt had moved out Rocky slipped to the closet snagging an outfit to wear before he tip toed out of the room to his car.