A/N I have to say ppl, im a bit upset. The hit counter says that i recieved 136 hits for that last chapter yet only 3 people reviewed. Now that seems a bit wrong to me and I would really appreciate if more ppl wud review, id love to hear wot u think.

Just want to thank my long-term reviewers gaul1, SpicySugar, Pandas Rule to World andPhoenix Tears. I give u cookies gives cookies

Sinking

That night there wasn't one person in Hogwarts School of Wicthcraft and Wizardry who had actually slept. Everyone had known about the attack on Hogsmeade because Dumbledore had received the owl from Sirius during dinner and he had jumped up straight away, calling for Madame Pomfrey. A Slytherin third year had then stolen the letter, so naturally, the whole school knew.
Students and teachers alike were huddled in groups all around Hogwarts talking quickly in quiet whispers. There was a rumor that a group of Gryfindor seventh years had been in Hogsmeade at the time of the attack and Dumbledore had been viewed carrying a figure wrapped in blackets into the hospital wing followed closely by Madame Pomfrey and several students.
The students had then been removed from the hospital wing with great protests just 20 minutes later and had then made their way into the Gryfindor boys' dormitory and locked the door. Not even the girls in the group left that room that night.

By 7 o clock the next morning Remus, Em, Harry, Hermione and Sirius were all in the hospital wing sat by Lily's bed. They had only left the night before because they had been made to and they had been stood outside of the hospital wing's door since 5:30 that morning.
They were all amazed by Lily's appearance. Amazed, that is, of how normal it was. She merely looked like she was asleep and, according to Madame Pomfrey, she was.
The nurse had been up all night doing various tests, using a number of potions and spells to try and discover what was wrong with the fiery red-head and she had no idea. There was no physical damage to her and her brain showed no sign of being anything but normal. As far as she could work out Lily was under some kind of sleeping spell. The problem was, however, that that could only be performed using a potion and according to Mr. Potter she had been hit with a spell.
This is what Madame Pomfrey was explaining to the group of students that currently sat around Lily's bed. They were all sat in silent wonderment, that was until she mentioned 'Mr. Potter'.
At the sound of his name Em looked up. 'Where is James?'
'Oh,' said Sirius, 'He, er, didn't wanna come.'
As he said this everyone looked confused. With a look on their faces which all asked the same question.
Why?

'Well he said he had some work he wanted to finish,' continued Sirius.
'Do you believe him?' asked Hermione knowing that of everyone Sirius knew James the best.
'No way!' exclaimed the boy, loudly, 'There's definately more to it.'
After he said this everyone went quiet.

'So,' said Remus changing the subject, 'does Dumbledore have any idea how to reverse this?'
'No, I talked to him last night and he said he'd never seen anything like this before,' said Em, 'he's stumped, so is Madame P.'
They all probably would have laughed at Em's Madame P. comment but none of them felt even slightly like laughing. They all looked down at the limp, lifeless figure of their friend (and in one case mother) with a look of great sorrow on their faces, each hoping that there would be a way to revive her but each also knowing that if Dumbledore didn't know then they were going to have some trouble finding it.

That night the group left the hospital wing at 10 when Madame Pomfrey insisted they left, Hermione and Remus being the only ones to have left at all and that was to retrieve some food from the kitchens. There had been no appearance from James all day.

They all left in silence, heading towards the common room, even though no-one had actually said it they all knew where they were going. When they reached the portrait hole, however, Harry muttered something about the library and left. They rest of the group looked at Hermione questionally who nodded and turned to follow him.
When she reach the library she saw Harry sat alone at a small table in the furthest back corner, just staring into space.
'She'll be ok, you know?' Hermione said from behind him. Harry didn't look around but she knew he was listening, 'You know that she must come out of this or you would never have been born.'
Harry sighed, 'But what if us being here has changed too much? What if we have changed too much? She might never wake up and I might never be born. Her and dad aren't even together here. What if none of this was ever meant to happen but it has because of us?'
Hermione closed her eyes. She had no response to this because secretly it was exactly what she herself had been worrying about, she had just hoped that he hadn't thought it too. So she moved into the chair next to Harry and simply pulled him into a hug with no intention of letting go anytime soon.
He was eternally grateful for this. He didn't want to talk to people and he didn't want anyone telling him it would be ok or asking how he was, he just wanted to be held and he loved Hermione so much in that moment for just knowing that.

'Hey James, where were you today?' asked Sirius as he and Remus entered the boys' dormitory, where their friend was currently sat on him bed staring into space. He looked up when Sirius spoke.
'Erm...I was busy. Homework and stuff, you know.'
'But, I'm in all your classes and we've hardly got any work at all. Even if we did you wouldn't do it,' Sirius chuckled as he said this, trying desperately to lighten the mood.
'Listen Sirius, I'm sorry if I want to actually spend some time on my schoolwork, that's not a crime is it? We do have NEWTs coming up you know!' James was now off his bed and standing facing Sirius with a look of anger on his face.
'Wow Prongs, chill.'
James flung his hands up in the air and stormed past Remus and out of the room.
Sirius slowing pivoted around to face his friend in the doorway with a look of confusion on his face.
'What's up with him, Moony?'
'He blames himself,' he said simply and Sirius couldn't help thinking how wise for his age his friend really was.
'Should we go after him, you think?'
Remus thought for a second then shook his head, 'Best let him have some alone time.'

After James left his friends in their dormitory he left the common room and proceeded to walk through the school with no particular destination. It wasnt until he reached the statue of the one-eyed witch that he made a decision. He felt in his pocket to check he had some money and muttered the password that would open the passage to Hogsmede.

If you asked James how he made it through Honeydukes unnoticed he wouldn't be able to tell you. He was walking in such a daze with so many thoughts running through his head that it was a surprise even to him when he discovered that he was outside of the Three Broomsticks.
He entered the pub and after ordering himself a firewhiskey at the bar (butterbeer just wasnt going to cut it today) (A/N I realise he is underage bt he's only a year underage in England and the barperson will assume he'd be at school if he wasn't 18) he found himself a table at the back of the pub out of the way.
James noticed with despair that all the songs that were playing seemed to be hugely depressing and so wasnt helping his mood.

In one single moment your whole life can turn around,

I stand there for a minute staring straight into the ground.
Looking to the left slightly then looking back down,

the world feels like its caved in, proper sorry frown.
Please let me show you how we could only just be for us,

I can change and I can grow or we can adjust.

The wicked thing about us is we always have trust.
We can even have an open relationship if we must.


I look at her, she stares almost straight back at me but her eyes glaze over like shes looking straight through me.
Then her eyes must have closed for what seems an eternity, when they opened up shes lookin down at her feet.

Chorus

Dry your eyes mate,

I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up.
There's plenty more fish in the sea.
Dry your eyes mate,

I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts,

but you've got to walk away now,

its over.

It was hard to believe that two days ago his greatest worry was that Lily wouldn't take him back. Now he would give anything, even have it so that he could never set eyes on her again, if she would just wake up. He missed her so much and would do anything to have her back.

'Woah! That's not good,' said Sirius when he saw James slumped over the table in the Three Broomsticks. Him and Remus had given James a few hours by himself and then decided to go look for him, however after seeing that he wasn't on the Marauders Map they assumed he had come to Hogsmede and they were right.
'As always Padfoot, you are indeed the king of stating the obvious,' replied Remus. Sirius shrugged and motioned to follow him over to his unfortunate friend who was currently passed out on the table.
'Come on Prongs, time to get up.' James looked up as if he wasn't sure who it was.
'Moony?'
'Yeah, it's me, we gotta get you back to Hogwarts before they alert the authorities.' While he said this he was trying to put his hand under James' arm and lift him up, with Sirius on his other side.
The pair managed to half carry/half drag their friend out of the pub and into the fresh air outside before James slipped out of their grasp and slumped onto the floor crying.
'Dude, how much have you drank?' asked Sirius.
'Alot, didn't you see all the bottles on his table?' Remus replied and Sirius nodded in reply, he was attempting to pull his mate back up from the ground but after failing he gave up and just sat down next to him. Remus did the same.
'She's gonna be alright, you know, Prongs,' said Remus, trying to sound as understanding as possible.
'But what if she'd not?' wailed James, uncontrollably, 'What if she dies and it's all my fault?'
Remus hung his head not really knowing what to say. He knew that he could tell James a million times that it wasn't indeed his fault but he wouldn't believe him. Surprisingly for both of them it was Sirius who came through with help.
'Look Prongs, I know that no matter how many times we say it's not your fault you're still not going to believe us but,' Remus was amazed that Sirius was actually saying exactly what he was thinking, 'James, sitting here and dwelling on it isn't helping, you have to pull yourself together for Lily's sake and come back to the castle and at least help us find a way to wake her up. You haven't even been to see her.'
James wiped some tears off his face with the back of his hand.
'I can't go and see her. I just can't.'
'Ok then don't,' piped up Remus, 'But just come back with us now. We'll get some sleep tonight and go straight to the library in the morning and find a way to bring her back. Hermione is amazing in that place, and we will find something.'
James nodded and struggled to his feet, wavered and Remus and Sirius caught him before escorting him back to Hogwarts.

The next day all James felt that he had gained from his little drinking session was a really bad headache. He woke up that morning and a pack of horses would have failed to pull him out of bed. Unfortunately for him, Remus and Sirius were better than a pack of horses and had him up and in the Great Hall for breakfast. That, however, didn't last long as the sight of food made James need to throw up so he quickly exited the hall.
James hadn't even realised that they were already in the Easter holidays and he seemed to have forgotton that they had their NEWTs in a mere month, fortunately for him he was the type of person who didn't need to revise. The others however did.
The group had taken to taking their books to Lily's bedside and spending the day revising there. Sirius had moaned that they should be able to get out of them because of what was happening but Remus warned them that Lily would kill them all if she woke up to discover they'd all failed their exams because of her.

James still hadn't been to visit Lily. He just couldn't bring himself to do it. One night he even managed to walk down to the Hospital Wing but he couldn't seem to make his legs walk through the door.
His friends were all really worried about him and all of them on several different occasions had tried to talk him into going to see Lily. They had all failed. There was simply nothing they could do short of putting him under the imperius curse and making him go but as Hermione pointed out that probably wasn't allowed.

A week later there was still no recovery from Lily. Fortunately she wasn't getting worse but Madame Pomfrey had tried everything she could think of to wake her up and had failed. One day, after Lily had been asleep for 6 days the group entered the Hospital Wing to discover that there were four healers around Lily's bed all muttering numerous spells and mixing potions, unfortunately by the time they left they were no more successful.
The suggestion had arisen that Lily should be moved to St. Mungo's but after seeing the look of horror on her friends face's Dumbledore convinced the healers that it would make no difference as she would still be just asleep there as she would be here.

A/N Ok guys, that chapter was a bit uneventful but I jus wanted to show the desperation that James was feeling

Plz R&R