The transportation hub of the Yordilian city Exel was a crowded venue that resembled an airport security gate stretching endlessly in all directions. It was manned by uniformed cat women who never smiled. Upon passing through the interstellar portal set up by the Thrag police, Alan, Tegan, Sue Ellen, and April found themselves at the back of a long, long line of alien creatures. The waiting was killing them.
"This is worse than when I flew to Nigeria from La Guardia," April and Sue Ellen remarked in unison.
"When they scan your genes, they'll know right away that you're a girl," Alan cautioned his sister. "You have a plan for that, right?"
"Trust me," Tegan assured him.
Time passed slowly, and the entertained themselves by singing a song George had invented years ago: "Infinity bottles of milk on the wall, infinity bottles of milk, take one down, pass it around, infinity bottles of milk on the wall. Infinity bottles of milk on the wall, infinity bottles of milk…"
Time still passed slowly. The aliens ahead of them shot them funny looks.
Finally the line of exotic beings dwindled, and the foursome confronted a scowling security woman. April stepped forward first, and the officer enveloped her with a laser beam from her gene gun.
"Bluhg?" asked the cat woman.
April looked over the array of buttons on the console before her, and punched one with the inscription, EARTH/ENGLISH.
"Name?" asked the woman.
"April Krantz."
"Planet of origin?"
"Earth."
"Purpose of visit?"
April attempted to sound nervous. "I…well, my sister and I just found out the other day that our parents were Yordilians. We thought it might be best to come here and live with our own people, but first we want to…"
"Vacation," Sue Ellen interjected. "Say vacation."
"Vacation," said April.
"Where are you parents?" asked the security officer.
"Unaccounted for," April replied. "Possibly dead. But we have relatives here waiting for us."
"You're clean," said the cat woman.
April proceeded forward, and Sue Ellen submitted herself to a gene scan.
"Name?"
"Sue Ellen Krantz."
"Planet of origin?"
"Earth."
"Purpose of visit?"
"Same as my sister's."
"You're clean," said the officer.
Alan stood before her next. As she scanned him, a series of symbols flashed on her computer display.
"Name?"
"Alan Powers."
"Planet of origin?"
"Earth."
"Purpose of visit?"
"I'm Sue Ellen's boyfriend."
"You're clean."
As Tegan strolled forward, she lowered her barette halfway to the back of her head.
"Name?" inquired the officer without bothering to scan the girl.
"Tegan Powers," she replied in a deep voice while moving her barette to its old position.
"Purpose of visit?"
"I'm April's boyfriend."
"You're clean."
The others expressed amazement that Tegan had passed through the checkpoint without incident. "How'd you do it?" Alan asked quietly.
"I planted a memory in her brain that she had already scanned me," said the bear girl with pride.
"Let's not waste any time," said April.
Using their newfound ability to read Yordilian signs, she and Sue Ellen led the Powers siblings through the busy transportation center and into the open, rather chilly air of the planet. Alan and Tegan marveled at the clear pink skies above their heads, and the majestic skyscrapers in the distance.
"The tallest one must be more than a mile high," Alan commented.
They walked along a yellow cobblestone path in the midst of solemn-looking cat women and girls. There were no men to be seen. Hovercars with glass domes rushed past them on the nearby highway.
"It's not like any country I've ever been to," Sue Ellen remarked.
"It's incredible," Tegan gushed. "They must be a thousand years ahead of us."
"Use your boy voice," Alan reminded her.
They soon noticed that many of the cat women were giving them envious stares. A cat girl in a red pantsuit burst into a delighted grin upon seeing them.
"I just love your dresses," she spoke in Yordilian. "Where did you buy them? Don't say Earth."
"Er, we no not speak language the Yordilian," said April clumsily.
The girl smiled understandingly. "Cute boys," she said, and walked away.
They walked for roughly two miles under a pale sun. Following the directions T'l'p'g'r had provided, they entered an apparent residential area lined with brightly-colored and expensive-looking houses.
"There it is," said April cautiously. The Belnap mansion was three houses away.
"How do we know Buster's in there?" Alan wondered.
"We don't," said Tegan. "Stay here and hide behind something. I'll knock on the door. If Amy answers, she won't recognize me."
"Wait," said Alan, spying a half-dozen cat girls playing in a clover yard. "There could be trouble."
"You're right," Tegan acknowledged. "What do you suggest we…"
Alan had already sprung into action, scurrying headlong down the alien street. "Hey, girls!" he cried out. "It's Sadie Hawkins Day! If you can catch me, you can marry me!"
The Yordilian girls fixed their eager eyes on him. "Urtfletz! Urtfletz!" ("Earth boy! Earth boy!") they chanted with glee, and began to pursue.
Alan failed to take one factor into consideration—Yordilians were, on average, much better runners than humans. The hooting cat girls overtook him in almost no time. While they pawed his clothes and face, Tegan calmly strode up to the front door of the Belnap house.
Knock, knock.
Marmel answered. "Griffit," the servant woman greeted Tegan.
"Griffit," the bear girl repeated, assuming it was Yordilian for "hello".
As Marmel waited for a more meaningful response, Amy Belnap popped up next to her, still wearing a blue Earth dress. She gazed at Tegan suspiciously.
"You're from Earth, aren't you?" she inquired.
"Yes," Tegan answered in a low-pitched voice. "I think I have the wrong house. I'm sorry."
"Wait," Amy ordered. "Don't leave just yet." Turning around, she called loudly, "Buster, someone's here to see you!"
Tegan waited tensely. The familiar long ears of the captive rabbit boy appeared from behind a paneled wall. Buster was wearing a pantsuit not unlike those sported by the native girls, as Amy had seen no need to purchase Earth fashions for him.
He stifled a gasp upon recognizing the visitor.
"Do you know this kid?" Amy demanded.
"Er, ah, no," Buster stammered. "I've never seen her before in my life."
"HER?!"
"Oops," muttered the embarrassed boy.
Amy's eyes flashed fire at Tegan. "You've come to take my boyfriend away," she snarled. "Marmel, prux u gibmat."
The servant woman ducked away. Guessing that her adversary had said something along the lines of "call the police", Tegan backed away in a panic. She wasn't quick enough. Amy leaped into the air, lashing out with her slippered foot and striking the bear girl's neck. The stunning blow rendered Tegan instantly unconscious, and she slumped to the ground.
Seeing her distress, Alan shoved his way through the crowd of adoring girls and ran toward the mansion with all his might. Sue Ellen and April followed suit, jumping out from behind a well-trimmed orange hedge.
"You!" snapped Amy, immediately recognizing her one-time friends.
"Hand him over!" Sue Ellen demanded. "He doesn't belong to you!" While she and April confronted Amy, Alan tended to his injured sister, who lay prostrate over the smooth walkway.
"If you want him," said Amy menacingly, "you'll have to fight me for him."
"As you wish," said April.
Letting out a fierce battle cry, Amy threw herself at the two girls…
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to be continued