Ruxpin Runaway
Bitey's Mistake
Charles: … Pumpkin … wake up sweetie.
Lydia: Huh? … Dad?
Lydia tried to concentrate on her father's facial expression in a half asleep slump.
Lydia: What's wrong?
Charles: Um, well, besides the fact that we need to talk, there are a bunch of FBI agents checking houses. So you need to look, as normal as you can.
Charles left the room trying to stay as calm as possible.
Lydia: And here I thought wishing it was all a dream would work.
Lydia slid out of bed and headed for the shower.
Lydia: On the plus side I'm not getting ready for school.
Lydia wrapped a towel around her, and turned on the shower.
Delia glided across the kitchen like a hummingbird in mating season trying to make a "We are a perfect family" breakfast. (Like in the cereal commercials)
Delia: Oh Charles! Don't act so nervous! You shake like you have a dirty secret to hide. We had nothing to do with "IT". So stop worrying.
Charles: Sorry, it may be the thought that Lydia is Queen of the Damned that's got me so jittery.
Delia: I think you're over doing it with your random theories. You've been her father all of her life, can you imagine her controlling the dead?
Delia gave him a discerning gaze.
Charles imagined Lydia at age five opening Christmas presents in pink jamies.
Delia: Well?
Charles: No.
Delia skittered back on to her trajectory in the kitchen.
Charles, still unsure of his answer leaned back in his chair and looked up the stairs at Lydia's bedroom door.
Lydia passed behind her father.
Lydia:
Morning.
Charles: AAHH!
The break of silence made Charles loose his balance and fall back in his chair.
Lydia: You ok?
Charles: … yes
A knock came at the door.
Charles screamed and leaped onto his feet.
Delia: - Charles, please! -
Delia answered the door like one of the Stepford wives.
Delia: GOOD MORNING!
The two agents didn't even react.
Agent#: Ma'm we are with the FBI and have warrant to investigate the area and any residence within the area in order to follow up on the events of yesterday afternoon.
Delia: WELL DO COME IN! YOU MUST BE GETTING SO WORN OUT FROM ALL THIS EFFORT TO PROTECT OUR LOVELY TOWN! PLEASE COME REFRESH YOURSELVES WITH A LITTLE BREAKFAST!
Lydia smacked her forehead with embarrassment
Agent#2: Why thank you so much Ma'm. We could use a bite to eat after a long morning, May we ask you a couple of questions as well?
Delia: WELL OF COURSE! ANYTHING TO HELP!
Delia led the men into the kitchen where an overzealous meal had been prepared.
Charles attempted to give a steady wave hello.
After a little eating, the men began to ask their questions.
Agent#2: Where were you all at 6pm?
Delia: We went to attend the school picnic to see Lydia's presentation.
The two men glanced at Charles and Lydia through their sunglasses.
Lydia gave a little smile. Charles gave a nervous nod with a quirky smile.
Agent#1: Were you present when the alleged "monsters" appeared?
Delia: Yes, it came right out of the ground behind Lydia.
Agent#2 glanced over at Lydia suspiciously.
Lydia: (In best acting voice) It was the most horrifying moment in my life. I thought I was going to die.
Agent#1: How did you all escape?
Delia: Well, I scurried around looking for Charles, I thought maybe he went to the car, but, there was a big snake in the parking lot. Of course Charles hadn't actually sat down with me at the picnic; in fact I don't know where he ran off to before the show.
The two agents looked at Charles waiting for a reply.
Charles nearly choked on his words.
Charles: I saw a Blue jay; and being a bird watcher, I decided to get a closer look and followed it to the park. That's when the tall purple worm took a bite of the tree my bird was in. Then I guess I blacked out.
Agent#2: Have you ever seen these things before? Any other sightings you know of?
Delia: Well, no. Do you know what they are?
Agents: We are trying to figure that out.
Agent#: Did any of you see where the creatures went?
The family looked at each other.
Deetz Family: Nope. No.
The two agents wiped their lips with their napkins and stood up.
Agents: Thank you for your time and hospitality, here is our card in case you remember anything. Please be sure to contact us with anything else you can tell us.
Delia: GOODLUCK ON YOUR INVESTIGATION!
She slowly closed the door as they walked down the street.
Charles immediately fainted.
Delia: Oh Charles.
Lydia: Wow. I better go call Betty and see if she's ok.
Delia: OH MY YES! You do that, and I'll help your father.
Lydia walked up to her room.
Lydia: Whew.
She closed the door behind her then noticed a teddy bear sitting on her bed.
Lydia: I don't believe I've seen you before.
She picked the bear up causing it to make squeaky noises.
Lydia: Hmm.
Lydia then smirked as she glanced over at the mirror.
Lydia: Beetlejuice, if you think giving me this creepy toy will make this all go away then you don't know me very well.
No response.
Lydia: Beetljuice? Huh.
A shadow formed behind her looming closer to her as it grew to its full size. It reached out to pull her back when Lydia suddenly turned around.
Lydia: Beetlejuice. You know that never works on me.
Beetlejuice stood in a fancy pose wearing a black and grey stripped tuxedo.
Lydia: What's the occasion?
BJ: Well I thought I could spruce up for a day like this.
Lydia: A day like what?
BJ: It's not every millennium you get to have a day like this.
Lydia: A day LIKE WHAT!
BJ: Yesterday caused a rip in the "wall" that separates our two worlds! Not to mention OTHER worlds!
Lydia: We can't just go play while my world huddles in a corner!
Beetlejuice put a finger to her lips.
BJ: Ah AH! We won't be going to play. Instead we'll be going to other dimensions to find someone to assist us in reassembling your reality.
Lydia: You lost me.
BJ: We get to go play in other worlds!
Lydia: I thought you said we weren't going there to play?
BJ: That's ridiculous why would the ghost with the most turn down a chance to add another victory to his tally in the "Ghost with the Most" contest?
Lydia: What about my world?
BJ: Simple, we find a way to convince everyone within the entire area that they were all hallucinating during a hurricane.
Lydia: Plausible yet impossible. Very much like our friendship.
Beetlejuice stared blankly at Lydia.
BJ: Just say the words.
Lydia: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice BEETLEJUICE!
They appeared in the middle of Beetlejuice's living room.
Lydia: AAWW MAN! What's that smell!
BJ: Bitey and me are real buds now.
Beetlejuice whiffed the air.
BJ: AWwww. I love the smell of wet animal fur.
Lydia: This is worse then that.
BJ: He has other talents. (Snort)
Bitey came waddling out of the bathroom his fur was an unhealthy grey.
Bitey: (Burp!) Squee! (Hack) (Cough)
Bitey coughed up a few soda cans and some of Beetlejuice's junk mail.
BJ: He'll eat anything!
Lydia: I don't think he's meant to eat that kind of stuff ALL of the time. He seems kinda…
Bitey face planted into a pile of garbage lying in the hallway.
Bitey: Squgg.
Lydia: Sick.
BJ: I feed him bugs too.
Lydia: Beetlejuice, you are the only one in the Neither world that can have a diet like yours. Bitey is meant for large portions of living flesh, or dead. But, mostly things considered edible.
Beetlejuice starred blankly again.
Lydia: As in human edible.
BJ: Oh.
Lydia picked Bitey up and wrapped him in her sweater she had worn to breakfast.
Lydia: Let's get you something to eat.
Charles sat in his chair and picked up the news paper. On the front page it read "Suspicious man hides daughter of the damned."
Charles: AAHHHHH!
Delia: Chalres! Wake up!
Charles: Huh what?
Delia: You were having another nightmare.
Charles looked at his surroundings and noticed the news paper still on his desk.
Charles: Whew.
As he picked it up he slowly turned it around. The front page read "Mysterious creatures run havoc at picnic."
Charles looked up not knowing if he should feel relieved.
Delia leaned back into his study.
Delia: I'm going to go see if any of the stores are open today. Did you need anything while I'm out?
Charles: A crucifix.
Delia lowered her eye brows.
Delia: Sarcasm won't help you Charles.
With that said she glided out the front door. Charles looked out the window as she swept across from his view.
Delia: Well today seems to be normal enough.
Delia continued to walk down the hill as the shopping center came into view. Cars were parking and people walked calmly in and out of the various stores.
Delia smiled and quickened her pace. From behind her she could hear a faint banging of some sort. She stopped, then, quickly turned around. Nothing was in sight. She continued her happy steps then heard it again getting closer. Instead of looking again she sped up. It got closer then stopped. She sped up some more. It got closer then stopped again. She finally turned around almost angry. No one was in sight but an overfilled garbage can that sat across the street to her right. She turned as if to continue walking. The banging started again. When she turned around she saw the garbage can walking around banging its lid up and down spilling garbage everywhere. When it approached a new garbage can it swallowed the garbage in it and continued down the street.
Delia could only watch with her mouth half way open until it stopped. She continued to walk slowly hoping not to get its attention. She glanced over at it once in a while to make sure she wasn't seeing things. The garbage can and her walked parallel down the street a good distance without stopping. She finally got back to her normal pace completely ignoring the garbage can. Just then it stopped again. This startled her and caused her to stop again as well. She slowly turned her head to the garbage can. Delia noticed it wasn't next to a garbage can this time. Her eyes widened as she looked down at her feet to see two knocked down garbage cans. She looked back up at the "walking" garbage can. It reared up and started chomping in her direction.
Delia: AAAHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh!
Charles put the paper down as his stomach rumbled.
Charles: Hmm a doughnut and some cocoa will put that fire out.
He walked into the kitchen and saw a teddy bear on the doughnut box.
Charles starred at it for a moment. Then he made some hot cocoa.
Charles: Hello Mr. Bear! Can I have a doughnut?
He lifted the toy off the box and set it on the table.
Charles: Why thank you Mr. Bear.
Charles took the doughnut into the study and sat down. After a few bites he looked around.
Charles: Where's my?
Glancing into the kitchen he saw the bear with the cup of cocoa sitting in between its legs. He got up out of his chair and walked back into the kitchen.
Charles: Almost forgot my Hot Chocolate.
Charles winked at the bear and walked back into the study.
Charles: I'm so skittish about being alone that I'm talking to a toy.
Charles heard a squeak under his feet.
Charles: OH! Sorry Mr. Bear; didn't see you there. heh heh.
Charles bent over and picked the toy up.
Charles: Clumsy me.
Charles set the bear on his desk.
After his snack and some of the sports page, Charles looked around making sure no one was around.
Charles: Cigar time.
He bent the news paper in half and saw the teddy bear sitting on the cigar box.
Charles raised one eyebrow to the toy as it faced blankly and motionless in his direction. Charles smiled warmly.
Charles: You're always right where I need to go aren't you?
Charles moved the toy over to the other side of the desk and took a cigar out of the box.
Charles: Now where's my…?
Charles looked slowly to his left and in the toy's lap rested his-
Charles: Lighter.
A bead of sweat ran down his forehead.
Charles: Heh heh, thanks again Mr.Bear. You can stop that now.
No response.
Charles: Oh who am I kidding! I'm getting all worked up over a toy!
He grabbed the teddy bear and tossed it behind him.
Charles: Out of sight out of mind.
Charles lifted the news paper back up to his face. As he turned to the next page he felt like someone was watching him. He quickly looked on his desk to see nothing but his open box of cigars.
Charles: I'm loosing it. Maybe another doughnut and some of the funnies will calm my nerves.
He put the news paper down neatly on his desk and went through the swinging door to the kitchen.
Charles stopped in his tracks when he saw the teddy bear sitting on the doughnut box again.
Charles: …help.
Meanwhile in the Neither world.
Lydia watched as Bitey the bat choked down on more food than two eyes could look at on one table. Beetlejuice sulked as he thought about the bill.
BJ: We REALLY need to come up with an alternate way of feeding that garbage disposal.
Lydia tried to hold in her giggle.
Lydia: But HEEZ SOOE KUTE!
Beetlejuice held his head as if to have a headache.
Bitey: (burp)
As soon as he was full Bitey began to glow. After a quick hiccup Bitey bit into the table. The table rumbled and grew a mouth in the middle then the seats began to transform into tentacles. Lydia and Beetlejuice dove onto the linoleum. The table began eating all of the nearby dishes.
BJ: Hmmmm….
BJ's Brain: that gives me another idea for my next prank for the G W T M contest!
BJ: Well time to go dimension jumping.
Lydia: You make it sound easy.
BJ: Should it be hard?
As soon as they were outside Lydia noticed that there was literally a tear in the fabric of the dimensions. A large whole that revealed the identity of the other world was wide open for anyone to traipse in at will. It was like looking into a mirror and being able to walk right in.
Lydia: Should have guessed.
The three of them hopped in Doomy and drove right in.
Lydia: So, is this an alternate world or alternate Neither world?
BJ: Um… (Looking around for a moment) both?
Lydia: So what are we looking for?
BJ: We need someone who can alter the past and change images in order to hypnotize all who witnessed the events into thinking it was all a hurricane or something.
Lydia: And who would have that kind of power?
BJ: I'm not positive but I'm sure someone does.
Lydia: Beetlejuice!
BJ: Well my guess would be the Eldest. He's the oldest supernatural being within the 3 dimensions.
Lydia: Oh. Do you know where this guy is?
BJ: As a matter of fact, no… I don't.
Later…
Lydia: BJ, are we going in circles?
BJ: Nonsense we have been going in a straight line this whole time. In fact there haven't been any turns. Hmm. Maybe we should pull over. Doomster, pull over.
Doomy: Beep! Meep
Beetlejuice got out and headed into the nearest building.
Lydia got out and asked the nearest person.
Lydia: Do you know where I can find the eldest.
The person turned around and had the face of a sandworm.
BJ: AAAHHHHHhhhh! SANDWORMS!
Beetlejuice grabbed Lydia and jumped into the driver's seat.
Lydia: Beetle-
VVRRROOOOOMMMmmmm.
BJ: you should have seen it Lydz! The WHOLE place was FILLED with'em!
Lydia: BJ. Look.
Lydia pointed to an ominous object blocking their way.
As the object got closer the sandworm-ish people began screaming.
BJ: Woah.
A large striped worm with a very familiar face loomed into the city and started terrorizing the town's folk.
Lydia: THAT THING LOOKS LIKE, YOU!
BJ: Hmm. Somethins not right. This seems sorta familiar actually.
WormBJ: That'll teach ya to eat me Haaha ha ha ha!
They both stared blankly as the Beetlejuice worm devoured the worm people.
Then suddenly everything faded into a blank terrain.
Lydia: What happened? Where are we now?
They stood on a flat grey landscape that looked like it was made out of some sort of metal.
BJ: OH yeah, that was a dream I had. We must be in dream land!
Lydia: Is that good?
Beetlejuice shrugged.
As they took a few more steps the scenery changed into Lydia's Neighborhood.
Charles: Good morning pumpkin!
Lyida: Hi Da-
LYDIA: Hey Daddy!
The other Lydia walked right through Lydia and hugged her dad.
BJ: Whoa. Who's the babe?
Lydia sulked in embarrassment.
Lydia: Me.
BJ: Your dad seems…healthy.
The dream Lydia was dressed in casual kaki business clothes. And Charles was in comfortable gardening clothes.
Charles: I can't believe you're getting married today!
BJ: Married? Lydia, get married? HA HA HA HAAH! I wonder what poor sucker you have picked as your dream guy. (snort)
Charles: Oh and here comes the man of the hour!
A fancy red sports car parked in the drive-way.
As the door swung open…
Charles: Speak of the devil!
BJ: This outta be good.
Beetlejuice turned around with a smug smile, waiting to make his first crack at her dream guy.
Charles: BeetleGuyse!
Beetlejuice's eyes widened and his pupils shrunk. His mouth slowly jarred open.
Dream BJ: It's Beetlejuice Mr. Deetz.
The dream Beetlejuice was a little taller slimmer and a tad cleaner, dressed for a wedding in a roughish pin striped suit and top hat.
Lydia hid herself behind her arms attempting to cover her blushing.
BJ: This must be some HORRIBLE nightmare that I had! I probably don't remember it 'cause I was traumatized! The bright sunshine, a happy Charles, Lydia all successful! Truly a dream demon was haunting me this night!
Dream Lydia: You should settle down yourself dad. Find a nice girl who likes birds.
Charles: Maybe you're right pumpkin.
BJ: Wait. A dream with no Delia would be a good thing. AH HA! This IS your dream Lydz!
Lydia hung her head.
Lydia: It's pretty stupid…huh?
BJ: Well, of-
Beetlejuice looked at what he could see of Lydia's face. A tear ran down her cheek. He turned his gaze to the now happy couple. They embraced each other and then kissed. Then held hands, and walked inside.
Beetlejuice raised her face gently and looked her in the eyes.
BJ: It's not all that bad.
Lydia whipped her tears and smiled.
Lydia: Really?
Voice: As a matter of fact…
BJ: Uh oh.
BJ's Brain popped out of his head.
BG: It's PERFECT!
The living brain scrambled towards the house and opened the door. He pulled out the Dream Beetlejuice and jumped in its head.
Suddenly the dream land took on a more sinister form as it reshaped itself into a demented version of the Neither World. Lightning struck as Beetleguese became one with the dream juice.
Beetleguese: That's much more like it!
Lydia: This answers a few questions.
Bitey peeked out from behind the back seat of Doomy. He saw the Evil BJ and then turned into a round ball out of fear.
Lydia: How is it you could touch the Beetlejuice in my dream?
BG: Lets just say I have been dreaming of this moment.
Hew grew long arms and shot them in their direction.
BG: ha HAH!
Mr. Mcurter was sitting on his porch rocking back and forth enjoying the new day. Mr. Mcurter was hard of hearing and nearly blind. He had no idea of the goings on that happened the day before. He heard a faint screaming coming from down the street.
Delia: AAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhh!
Delia sat in the "mouth" of the rampaging trash can covered in all kinds of garbage.
Mr. Mcurter: I figured she was a nut job. "Modern art" Humf!
As Delia began to calm down she looked ahead over her.
The walking trash bin was headed for the dumpster behind the mall.
Delia: AAAAAHHHHHHHHhhh!
Charles: Ok. THIS is not happening.. It's all coincidence.
Charles approached the toy cautiously and picked it up with his thumb and index finger.
Charles: I'll just put it in Lydia's room. That'll get my mind off of it.
The ascent up the stairs seemed like it went on forever as Charles carefully carried the bear who could only stare right back at him.
Charles: Whoever manufactures this thing was a horror scholar.
Lydia's bedroom door creaked open and Charles poked his head in making sure there was no undead roaming in her room.
Charles: Whew. Now we'll just set you down on the bed. And let Lydia put you away where you belong.
Charles stood back up and backed out of the room never taking his eyes off of the vacant gaze of the teddy bear.
Charles shut the door and turned toward the stairs.
Charles: (shivers) BLUH! I feel like I've been touching spiders. Bleck!
The un-nerved man headed for his study to relax.
Charles: (Sigh)! Nice comfy lazy boy. Hmm, I wonder where Lydia ran off to.
Charles reached for the remote and began flipping through the channels.
Charles: What's taking Delia so long?
Meanwhile, at the city dump.
Delia: AAAAAHHHHHHhhhhh!
Charles: Oh well. I could use the quiet time for a good nap.
He leaned back and folded the paper over his eyes.
(Grumble)
Charles: Of course…I finally get relaxed, and then nature calls.
Charles got up and headed through the kitchen. Just then he began to hear some sort of shuffling sound. And then, from up stairs.
( Thump, pat pat pat pat.)
Charles: ………
(THUD! DDrrrRRAAAAAGGGgggg Crack!)
Charles followed the sound of the dragging to the stair well where it seemed to have hit the door knob on Lydia's door causing the wood to crack a bit.
Charles' eyes widened as he watched the door knob shaking back and forth.
Charles: …this isn't real. I'm just seeing things out of stress.
Charles watched the door knob twist some more and built up a little courage,
Charles: HA! I locked the door! I'm on to your games Mr. Bear! You can't get out and terrorize MY afternoon! NO SIR!
Suddenly a Large kitchen knife jutted its way through the wood near the handle.
Charles: Ack!
The knife began to repeatedly stab the wood attempting to make a passage way.
Charles looked down to realize it was too late to go to the bathroom. He looked back up at Lydia's door to see the knife still cutting its way through and ran for the garage.
Charles: This is just a dream! Come on Delia, WAKE ME UP!
Charles was so jittery that he couldn't even get the keys in the ignition.
He could hear footsteps on the hood of the car making their way to the windshield.
As he tried to start the car he looked outside the windshield waiting to see that creepy blank faced toy peer through the glass.
Just as he imagined, the teddy bear peeked in the car upside down as it dangled from the rooftop wielding Delia's biggest kitchen knife. It smiled widely with its little stitched mouth full of tiny pointed teeth. Then it slid down the glass and ran to the edge of the hood.
Charles froze in fear.
The animated toy smiled again and lifted the hood of the green station wagon up and slipped under and closed it.
Charles could only listen to the silence and wait for the bear to appear again.
Charles: …
Squinting his eyes he focused his best on not fainting.
To be continued … watch the news