Family Portrait
A/N: Thanks for all the reviews. I know you guys waited a long time for that last chapter and I'm really sorry. Anyway, the only reason I let the evil cliffhanger was because I wanted to get that chapter to you as soon as I could and that was the only way. Also, as promised I have dedicated myself to finishing this story and updating more often. Here you guys go, now please review and tell me what you think.
Chapter 14: The Longest Day Part 2
Tristan stared at Rory in utter shock, a cold wind whirled around them and she wrapped her arms around herself to try to keep warm, waiting for him to say something. The silence was the kind of silence no one liked, never wanted to experience. Thick, uncomfortable, chilling silence impossible to just wish away. She stared right back at him, unable to break the silence herself.
Finally, Tristan looked away from her, expression still unreadable. He removed his jacket and slid it over her shoulders, trying to help her get warm. Blue eyes still unblinking, she slipped her arms into the sleeves and watched him carefully, trying to find her voice again.
He beat her to it though, as he sat next to her and ran a hand through his hair. Turning back to look at her once more, eyebrow raised he asked, "Are you sure?"
"Positive," Rory croaked in response, nodding ever so slightly. Wrapping the jacket tighter around her small frame, trying to disappear into it. More than anything she wanted to be able to tell what he was thinking, feeling about this but Tristan kept his composure, letting out a long, deep breath.
"And it's mine?" He said this precautiously, so as not to offend her. There was no insinuation of calling her a whore, or saying that she slept around a lot. It was just to be absolutely sure that he understood what she was saying right. Rory knew this and just nodded, letting this news sink in for him. "So…that night…"
"Yeah, that night," she nodded once more, you wouldn't have even seen her nod if you hadn't been watching closely. Rory was practically frozen in place, sure that the news she had just relayed still hadn't been processed in his head.
"What now?" Tristan finally asked, looking to her as if she had all the answers in the world. He looked scared then, different than Rory had ever seen him. Almost like a small child who was confused by the world around him.
"I don't know," her reply finally came. They sat there for a while longer in silence once more. The bustling of the marathon could still be heard faintly in the distance, people laughing, enjoying their time together, enjoying the Stars Hollow event as they always did. It was well into the morning by this time, the sun having risen what seemed like centuries ago. It was unbelievable that so much time had passed since the marathon had commenced.
"I want to be there," if it hadn't had been as silent as it was, if she hadn't been waiting to hear something else, she might've missed his whisper. A small, relieved smiled appeared and she glanced back over at him, showing that she wanted him there too. "I wouldn't dream of not being there," this statement came louder, clearer and more confident than the last one.
"Good," Rory's smile grew a little, the feeling of suffocating fear of being along slowly letting go of her heart, "Because I don't know what I'd do if you weren't around for this. I don't think I could do this alone, being the only parent again."
"I wouldn't do that to you," he assured her, wrapping his arm around her and drawing her close, "Never to you Mary." She leaned into him and felt near tears, happiness of knowing that she would never have to worry about being alone overwhelming her. For once, things didn't look so bleak anymore; everything was going to be all right.
He placed a soft kiss on the top of her head and Rory buried her face in his chest and held on tightly, crying ever so slightly, breathing in his sweet scent. It was nothing like Jess' but it was comforting nonetheless. He was the father of her second child; he was her rock, her best friend right now. Not like Lane or Paris, but a different kind of best friend. He understood things about her that no one else would.
They were a sight to see. Two adults seeking comfort in each other with the big news that had just connected them forever, they had created the life that was at this moment growing inside of her. Although both knew that she could never love him the way he wished she would, she loved him in a way she would never love anyone else and that was enough.
When it came time to return to the marathon, both ignored the bellowing of the mega-phone, the start of the music. It didn't matter anymore. It hadn't mattered in the first place, but now they had to deal with a lot more than just winning some stupid trophy. Lane and Dave were still there to win for Lorelai.
Jess scanned the crowd as Kate dragged him back onto the dance floor, searching for them. More specifically searching for her. He had known when they left that she was going to tell Tristan what she had told him already. Jealousy had overwhelmed him, but now he was more afraid of losing her to him. It was insane, here he was with Kate, a woman he cared deeply for, loved even and he was afraid of losing something that wasn't his anymore to begin with.
They weren't there, had not returned from where they went off too and Jess grew anxious. He knew Kate could probably tell that he was antsy, off somewhere else, she always could. More than anything Jess felt guilty about feeling the way he did towards Rory when Kate was here, wonderful Kate who loved him more than anything.
"Jess?" Kate poked his arm lightly, and Jess looked at her then. She had been trying to get his attention for a while; he knew this by the look in her eye. "What's up?" Eyebrows furrowed she watched him carefully with her deep, green eyes.
He leaned in closer to her and whispered so only she could hear, "Rory's pregnant again."
"What?" Although her voice was low, to not cause a scene she had pulled back, shock etched across her pretty face, "You're not…"
"No," Jess shook his head abruptly, dismissing her thought of him cheating, "Tristan."
"Oh. Good," Kate nodded, confused now, "So, she went to tell him then."
"I guess," Jess shrugged, "They're not back."
"Why does it matter Jess?" She wondered, "I know you're Liza's father and that you might be afraid of him taking over whatever role and relationship you're trying to form with her, but you had this look before…when you zoned out…"
"I think I might still love her," Jess confessed. There was no use lying about, too much hurt would come from just that one lie. He couldn't deal with anymore hurt or secrets. Not after everything that had happened since he returned to Starts Hollow and saw Rory again.
"You think?" Kate said slowly, she looked hurt. Holding back tears she took in deep breaths, refusing to look at Jess just then. She didn't want to see the truth in his eyes, didn't want to see what she feared would be there, what she had ignored for the longest time.
"I know," he too was looking away from her it was too hard.
"I know too," she nodded, and then leaned into him, letting her tears loose and Jess held her for what might be the last time.
Lane danced happily with Dave, Lorelai had gone off to talk with Luke, Rory was dealing with her troubles and here Paris was alone. Not really alone if you counted the fact that she was playing 'Go Fish' with Liza as Lucas slept on the bench next to her. Jamie was gone and she doubted he was going to come back.
She was Paris Gellar though, she was tough, mean, and would no cry. This was just a setback, Jamie had been a distraction and he was weak and sentimental. Yet, Paris still couldn't convince herself about any of those facts. It was stupid, not wanting to get married, not wanting to have kids. One mistake, not even made by her, had formed her whole opinion on marriage.
Lorelai and Luke were making it work. Emily and Richard Gilmore seemed to be doing fine, despite little disputes from time to time, and now Lane and Dave were even taking the plunge. Paris couldn't understand why she couldn't do the same thing. She loved Jamie more than anything else in the world.
Taking out her cell phone Paris dialed the all too familiar numbers of Jamie's own, but hung up before even the first ring as Liza stared at her, wide-eyed and waiting for Paris to take her turn quickly growing impatient. Putting the phone away, the cards down on the bench, Paris got up and climbed down the bench. Sookie seeing her leave, let go of Jackson's hand and went over to sit with Liza, forgetting about the dance marathon altogether. Paris barely took notice though.
Walking away, away from everything Paris began to sob. Brushing her blonde hair back, she continued down the street letting her façade drop. Warm tears dripped down off her chin and fell onto the cold asphalt, some fell to her shoes and others were wiped away by a swift movement of her hand. Cheeks tear stained, eye red and puffy, and low, deep sobs made her look like some stranger. Someone unfamiliar to even her, she couldn't remember the last time she had actually cried.
It hadn't taken long for her to convince herself that Jamie wasn't coming back, after all everyone eventually left her. Her father hadn't tried to contact her in years, her mother basically ignored her, Louise and Madeleine had pretty much dropped off the face of the planet. All she had left was Rory and Lane and someday too they would be gone. Lane was getting married, Rory was having Tristan's baby. One day, neither of them would have time for poor, pathetic Paris Gellar.
Shaking her head Paris wiped away her tears and turned to look at herself in a window of a store along the street. She was a mess. "Get a grip Gellar," she ordered her reflection, "You're starting to sound like Gilmore with all these thoughts of being alone. Gilmore and Lane aren't going to stop talking to me. Jamie will come back and we'll apologize or else it's his loss! That's right, his loss…not mine."
Rory and Tristan returned to the marathon after an hour. During that time they had sat in each other's arm, comforted by knowing they were going to be all right, doing this together. They had talked some, about the future, about what they were going to do. Nothing had been decided, but it was all as well. Nothing needed to be decided, they would take everything one baby step at a time.
It had been a long morning, and Rory was sure that their day was far from over. Although the biggest of her worries was out of the way, she couldn't know what would come next. Stars Hollow events were always full of surprises.
By now, her mother was talking with Sookie as both played with Liza, Paris was no where in sight and Lane and Dave seemed to be having a pleasant enough time out on the dance floor. Her eye caught Jess and Kate, still dancing but Kate looked as if she had just been crying. She and Jess both looked slightly uncomfortable, as if they were two people who used to be in love and had just met years later, one of them still longing for the other.
"Where've you been?" Lorelai exclaimed, upon seeing her and Tristan.
"Talking," Rory told her mother, as she walked up to the two. Lorelai stood up and gave her daughter a big hug, knowing that it was what she needed just then.
"Everything all right?" Lorelai asked, concerned. Her gaze fell on Tristan and Rory knew she was ready to kill him if he had done anything to make her sad.
"Everything's fine,' Rory assured her mother, "We're all going to be okay."
"Yeah, we are," Tristan nodded, smiling a little. He wrapped his arm around Rory and she looked up and him and smiled back.
"You are a good man Mr. DuGray," Lorelai grinned, "My daughter hasn't smiled in days. I like you."
"Well, that's comforting, considering I'm going to be the father of you're next grandchild," Tristan pointed out, "Be a shame to hate me. All the family events you'll have to see me at."
"Quit while you're ahead," Lorelai warned, "Family events shall not be mentioned around me!"
"Yes m'am," Tristan nodded, "I'm sure I can work with that."
"Good," Lorelai nodded, "Now since you two are clearly out of the marathon, I suggest you sit and hope Lane and Dave save your sorry asses and win this year! Otherwise be prepared to face the wrath of Lorelai Gilmore!"
"Mom…" Rory muttered, shaking her head. Sometimes her mother just didn't know when to let go of the fact that she may never be able to beat Kirk at the Dance Marathon unless he got into an unfortunate accident where he couldn't dance or died. Of course, one was just as likely as the other but with Kirk, you could count that he would rise from the grave just to take the trophy from Lorelai.
"Oh fine," Lorelai huffed, reading her daughter's mind, "There will be no killing of my beloved daughter or the father of her child."
"Thank god," Tristan grinned, taking a seat on the bench, facing away from the dance marathon. Liza moved down to sit in front of him then and slammed the deck of cards onto the empty space in front of her.
"Play with me," this was an order, not a request and even though Rory knew she had taught her daughter manors, she was still only four and could no be counted on to actually be the perfect little girl twenty four-seven.
"Sure," Tristan nodded, picking the cards up and shuffling them, "What's your game of choice? Rummy, Crazy Eights, Strip Poker?"
Rory poked Tristan in the rubs, and gave him a disapproving frown. He just shot her his patented Tristan DuGray smirk and turned back to Liza. "Go Fish!" she declared proudly, the exchange between her mother and Tristan going unnoticed, not even picking up on the Strip Poker suggestion. This surprised Rory, usually Liza was like a sponge with things that she wasn't supposed to do or say. Deciding not to push her luck, Rory watched the two a bit before turning her gaze back onto the dance floor.
Slowly, the numbers were diminishing, but there was still quite some time left in the marathon. Kirk looked like he could hold out forever, and Lane and Dave looked in pretty good shape too. Rory wouldn't be surprised if this were a close call, especially not with her perky Korean best friend in the running. Jess and Kate though looked like they were ready to quit at any second; they had gone from a happy couple to miserable in a matter of minutes it seemed.
"What happened to Paris?" Rory asked, she'd rather not dwell on what was wrong with Kate and Jess, especially not when she was happy about thinking the worst happened with them.
"She got up and left a while before you guys got back," Lorelai replied, "She was playing with Liza and called Sookie over to take over before taking off. That girl's always ceased to amaze me."
"I'm worried about her," Rory admitted, "Paris has a tendency of bottling up."
"Kind of like someone I know," Lorelai smiled faintly at her daughter and Rory looked away. Had her attitude during the past month or so rub off on Paris?
"Things have been going all wrong lately," Rory sighed, feeling comforted by the feel on Tristan's touch on the small of her back, reminding her that things might not be as bad as them seem. She might never be able to have Jess, but at least she knew Tristan would be there for her regardless.
"I know," Lorelai nodded, placing her hand on her stomach, "But things will get better. They always do. You'll have a new brother and sister, a new kid; Lane and Dave are getting married. Things will get better."
"Yeah," Rory smiled, and glanced behind her once more at the dance marathon, at the people of Stars Hollow. Her mother was right that things would get better. It was all uphill from here in her mind. The worst was far behind her.
It was an hour before the end of the marathon. The day had come and gone once more and her mother had long ago left to take Liza and Lucas back home. Paris was back, talking with Tristan as Rory sipped her newly fetched coffee. Although Luke and Tristan had both tried to stop her, she had still convinced both of them that coffee would not harm the baby. Liza was proof, so both men had agreed that she could have it only for this night though. After she was going to have to follow the same 'no coffee' rule as Lorelai.
Jess and Kate were still on the dance floor but they looked decidedly more comfortable than they had a few hours ago. Rory had monitored them occasionally, and saw that they had been talking at first seriously and now amicable. There were no longer pecks on the cheek or short sweet kisses though, she couldn't help but notice. What had happened while she had been away, Rory had no idea. She did intend on finding out though, one way or another.
Tristan reached out and put a hand on her shoulder and Rory turned around and smiled at him, tucking her hair behind her ear and taking another sip of her coffee. "I'm going to be right back," he told her and she nodded and he walked away.
"You two are acting like an old married couple now," Paris noted quietly. Although she looked better than when she had left, there was still a flicker of sadness to be seen in her eyes.
"We are not," Rory shook her head, "He's just trying to make sure me and his baby are all right."
"He loves you Rory," the blonde told her, Rory knew this but it felt all the more real coming from someone else, "If he thought you'd say yes, he'd ask you to marry him."
"Because he thinks it would be the right thing to do," She wasn't so sure this was true, but it was what she wanted to believe. It made things easier to believe that.
"No," Paris shook her head; "Tristan DuGray would've asked you to marry him in High School if he could've."
"He was just trying to make me another one of his conquests, he doesn't love me Paris!" As she said this, Rory glanced at Tristan who had stopped on the way to the bathroom to say a couple of words to Dave, getting some water for him and Lane. If he asked, Rory wasn't sure she'd say no.
"Believe what you want Gilmore," Paris shrugged, "But I know Tristan DuGray, and I know that look he's been giving you all night."
Rory sighed and shook her head. She loved Jess with all of her heart, yes, but sometimes it might just be better to let go of that love and make room for something new. Make room for what Tristan was willing to give her. Maybe she could love him, not like he loved her, but close enough.
Jess smiled slightly at Kate. Things were better now than they had been so long ago. It would've been easy to just drop out of the marathon and walk away from this, but he wouldn't let himself. Neither would Kate; she had insisted that they work through this. Even though they couldn't be in a relationship anymore, not now that he admitted to loving Rory they could at least be friends. After all, it's the way they had started.
They'd had a serious talk, a talk about his feelings towards her, and towards Rory. About what her wanted too do now and in the end they had found a good place to start over. There was still the awkward pause, the impulse to kiss her when she turned her head and swept her hair out of her face. Or when she looked up and gave him that cute smile of hers. It wasn't love though, it was habit, and it was an attraction that would always be there.
"What're you thinking about?" Kate asked after a moment, arms wrapped around his neck. She didn't look as sad as she did, but she didn't look as happy as she was when the marathon had started twenty-three hours ago. Being stuck spending all day with each other, they had been forced to work out their problems quicker than others.
"About us," Jess told her honestly, "About what happened today."
Kate nodded, "Yeah. Kind of strange how quickly things can change."
"Yeah…" Jess nodded, trailing off, "Kate?"
"Hmm?" Kate raised a brow.
"Thanks."
"For what?" Kate frowned a little, completely unsure about what he was talking about. She didn't understand why he was thanking her, couldn't understand what here was to thank her for. Jess knew he had so many reasons to thank her though, more than he could count.
"For everything," she said simply and kissed her forehead, "You're great."
"Just not Rory Gilmore," she said this somewhat bitterly, but then she shook her head and flashed him a small smile. Jess knew that was just some of the remaining hurt coming out. He expected it because she did love him, had told him many times that he was her first real love.
"No, but Rory was…is different, I don't know why I love her and sometimes I wish I could love you like I do her," the words felt strange in Jess' mouth. He had never said anything similar to this but he felt that if anyone deserved them it would be Kate.
"I think I better go now," Kate told him quietly, "Think it'd be better for both of us if I did." She leaned up and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Good luck with everything Jess Mariano." Then, with that she left and walked off of the dance floor and out of his life. Maybe forever.
Rory watched as Kate left Jess standing on the dance floor and felt a strange flutter in the pit of her stomach. They had broken up, that much she knew but she wasn't sure what that could mean for them. If there could even be a them now that she was pregnant and Tristan was here for her.
She didn't want to be selfish; she didn't want people to hate her, namely Tristan. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him after he had been here for her all this time. Really, she wasn't sure she wanted to jump into Jess' arms no matter how much she loved him. For the past two months she had been depressed about Jess and not being with Jess now that he was back. She felt alone and unwanted, but now she was finally feeling a bit happy again. If Jess left her again, if something went wrong she would just fall back into the same cycle.
No, he wouldn't leave her. Not with Liza in the picture now. She didn't know what she was going to do if Jess wanted to be with her. There was so much more to consider now. Tristan was coming back towards them and Rory glanced away from Jess to watch him come back towards them. Just as Jess stepped off the dance floor and up to where they were.
"Rory," Jess greeted, nodding at Paris and Tristan briefly.
"Jess," Rory nodded back at him, "You need something."
"Can we talk?" Jess raised a brow, waiting quietly for an answer and Rory nodded, standing up and going up to him.
"Sure," she stood next to him and looked into his chocolate brown eyes, "The bridge?" Jess nodded silently and turned to lead the way.
Lane leaned her head on Dave chest and close her eyes, she was so close to sleep it was unbelievable. He held onto her tightly but she could feel his head nod now and then. Checking the time she saw that there was not much time left, that another couple was walking off the dance floor and that there were only they, Kirk and one other couple.
They were so close to winning, she could almost taste victory and she glanced into the crowd to see if Lorelai was back yet to see them. She was, almost at least, walking down the street towards the marathon having gotten Sookie to take her place watching over Lucas and Liza to watch the end.
Kirk was badgering the other couple, trying to get them to quit and Lane knew they would. No matter how tired she was, she would not let Kirk win for another year. He was still undefeated and Lane planned to change that, especially considering that this was her first marathon and she already knew all the tricks thanks to Lorelai.
"We're almost done," she whispered to Dave, she could feel him growing antsier by the second. It had been a long Day and he was ready to get it over with and go to bed. So was she.
The third couple dropped out, the woman letting go of her husband to snap at Kirk and suddenly there was only Lane, Dave, Kirk and his date left. Adrenaline pumped through Lane's veins and she was suddenly more awake. This was it, the moment that she had been waiting for all night, the moment she knew Lorelai had been anticipating for years. They could and they would beat Kirk this year.
"Lane…" Dave said lowly, warning her not to get too harsh with Kirk. Lane had made Kirk cry one a couple of years ago, and she could make him cry again if that's what it took to win. She knew that was what Dave was trying to tell her not to do though.
"Give it up Lane!" Kirk demanded, "Lorelai and Luke couldn't beat me, neither can you two!"
"Watch me!" Lane grinned, "We're younger than you, we can party all night and we can stay up and we're not the least bit tired."
"You're not the least bit tired," Dave whispered in reminded, "I'd be willing to trade in my guitar for a bed right now."
"Kirk, let's just let them win, I'm tired too," his date whined. Then, Kirk stepped back, upset and started to say something when he realized he had let go of her. His eyes grew wide as Miss Patty began to announce that Lane and Dave were the winners as Taylor continued to sleep soundly beside her.
On the sidelines Lorelai could be seen jumping up and down in happiness, Paris was clapping and Luke was walking over to attempt to calm his wife down. Lane let go of Dave and started to jump up and down as well, exhilarated about having won the dance marathon.
Kirk had succumbed to crying on the floor as Lane wrapped her arms around Dave and kissed him passionately while Lorelai grabbed the trophy from Patty and danced around him. "We won!" Lane shouted happily and ran over to Lorelai, joining her dance.
"You two are evil," Luke shook his head, coming up to stand next to Dave, Tristan and Paris joining them as well.
"They're taking too much pleasure in this," Dave noted, chuckling lightly.
Jess and Rory sat side by side on the bridge, their feet dangling off the edge. They had been sitting there for a while in silence, Jess trying to decide what to say and Rory waiting for him to say something.
The water was dark and calm, ripples appearing down and then as a bug fluttered over the surface, and the moon and stars sparkling down in it. The air was crisp and Rory still had Tristan's jacket wrapped tightly around her. "So?" she broke the silence, anticipating what he had to say, wanting to know what it is he wanted to tell her.
"Kate and I broke up," he said quietly.
"I figured," Rory said in reply and glanced sideways at him, trying to read the expression on his face. Jess remained, as ever, unreadable.
"Because of you," he added after a moment, and Rory was taken aback. She hadn't expected that, even if she had thought it she didn't think that Jess would out and tell her that she was the reason they ended their relationship.
"Me?" Rory breathed, looking at Jess' reflection in the water then.
"I love you Rory," she saw him look away from her, look away from even her reflection in the water as he said this and Rory knew he meant it. It was only the second time she had ever heard her say those four words her all in the same sentence.
She said nothing for a while; she processed this information slowly making sense of what he had just told her. The words were on the tip of her tongue but she hesitated saying them in return even though she felt them. There were so many things to take into consideration now. "I love you too Jess," she finally responded, he needed to know how she felt, "But I don't know if I can be with you."
"Do you love him too?" he asked.
"Not like you," Rory shook her head, "I might love him though and I'm pregnant with his kid now. I need to consider all the possibilities. He wants to be there for me, for the baby, for everyone."
"I want to be there too," Jess told her, "I love you Rory and I want to be with you. I want to be a father to Liza and I want to be a father or a step dad or whatever to this kid too. If you'll let me I want to be in your life, forever."
"I-I don't know," Rory was near tears, everything she had wanted was right in front of her but right now she wasn't sure if it was still what she wanted., if it was what was best for her, for the baby, and for Liza.
"Think about it," Jess pleaded.
"I'll think about it," Rory agreed and then got up and walked away back over to the marathon to see what had happened. It had been a long day and now she was looking forward to falling asleep and waking up with a fresh new day ahead of her. To look at all of this with a clear head and figure out the new load of problems and choices that had presented themselves.