Chapter Two
Severus found that dinner passed quickly for once.
They say that time flies when you are having fun, and there was nothing he liked more than a bit of plotting. He thought that if he were a better man he would have felt guilty about using Hermione to pay back the Terrible Two. Fortunately he was relieved to say that he wasn't a better man - it would get in the way of so much that was enjoyable in life. Anyway she seemed to be perfectly happy in the knowledge that their 'relationship' was going to annoy the pair of them. So his conscience, if he had a conscience, was clear.
Hermione had a flair for the dramatic typical of her house, and if she had her way, they would have been snogging in the middle of the Great Hall by the end of the evening.
"You Gryffindors have no subtlety at all," he said scathingly.
"Severus, who the hell are we dealing with?" she replied with asperity. When he looked blank she continued, "Gryffindors. If we faff around with subtlety we will be waiting until next year for anyone to notice."
He hated to admit she had a point. "What about Albus? He's bound to tell everyone we are at it like knives. He'll never be able to resist the temptation to boast about how he knew it was going to happen, and how we are made for each other, and how it is all his doing. He's worse than Trelawney for claiming credit for things that had absolutely nothing to do with him."
"We just swore him to secrecy."
"Bugger."
"Do you have a problem with kissing me? Because we aren't going to get very far if you do. A certain amount of physical contact is necessary you know!"
"That's not the point. You can hardly expect me to change the habits of a lifetime and start snogging in public."
"Shy, Severus?" she mocked. "You certainly didn't seem to mind putting on a show for us all at the Hallowe'en Ball. You can hardly claim that you don't go in for public displays of affection after that!"
He flushed a dull red. "That is completely different. I certainly didn't set out with the intention of being caught in flagrante." It wasn't his idea to have sex in the corridor, but the little witch had been most persuasive. She hadn't taken their subsequent discovery at all well, and still wasn't speaking to him. Not that he was disappointed about that, but it was very annoying to be blamed for something that wasn't his fault, was eminently predictable, and something he had indeed pointed out to her as a likely outcome. At the time, she had considered the possibility had added spice to the encounter. An opinion she changed very rapidly thereafter.
"Although, if you want Ron and Harry to catch you being taken up against a wall I would be happy to arrange it," he said blandly. It was her turn to flush.
"That won't be necessary, thank you," she said primly. "But a little . affection wouldn't be amiss."
Severus raised an eyebrow. "Affection? Me?"
"I am not going to be treated like on of those little tarts that keep hanging round the three of you. I have got more self respect than that."
Severus had the feeling that he was skating on very thin ice. It seemed that at least part of the trouble between the three friends involved their active social lives. He quickly discarded the idea that she was jealous; there had never been anything like that between them. She had likely had to pick up the pieces of some young lade dumped after a one-night-stand once too often and taken them to task for their behaviour. Probably in very forthright language. He could just imagine them being stupid enough to take that for jealousy, and crassly stupid enough to tell her that.
Prats.
Hence, the cooling of the friendship and her sudden desire to get 'engaged'. There was surely little on God's earth more guaranteed to get under the skin of Harry and Ron than the thought of the two of them together.
He felt quite indignant on her behalf. It was beyond shabby to have treated her in that way. Nearly ten years of friendship should have counted for more. He hadn't thought it possible to despise the Terrible Twosome more than he did, but she really deserved better than being given the cold shoulder whatever the reason for the split. She had saved their lives for Merlin's sake!
And as someone who could count the number of living friends on the fingers of one hand, he thought that they were a pair of ungrateful bastards. So he would put on a good show, and demonstrate that someone else appreciated their friend, even if they didn't.
Oh bugger was that a twinge of vermiform conscience?
"Alright," he conceded. "I take your point. What I suggest is, we go our separate ways for the rest of the evening but cast longing glances at each other across a crowded room. If we do that in front of enough people someone is bound to take notice. Word will quickly spread and by the end of the evening everyone will be watching us to see what we do. I will drift over to you trying to look as shifty as possible, and we leave together. You spend the night in my rooms, and I think we can safely rely on the house elves and Albus to do the rest."
"That should do it," she said after a moments thought. "We can always escalate things if people don't take the hint."
"They're thick," he said dryly looking pointedly at her two erstwhile friends, "but they're not that thick. Oh, very well," he said, putting up his hand to forestall any further argument, "a quick peck on the cheek but I'm not holding hands in public. I still have to teach you know, and I'd never hear the end of it."
She had smiled at that, as he had intended her to do. The truth was that any little bleeder that thought they could take advantage of him now he had a sex life was rapidly disabused of the idea. The young lad who had thought it amusing to ask questions about the proper technique for sex against a dungeon wall had regretted the impulse immediately and for a very long time. No one had ever received detention with Filch for an entire year before. He could start wearing pink robes and still terrify a classroom. In fact, merely wearing pink robes would probably be enough on its own.
He found himself admiring her cleavage again. They really were very nice breasts. He was surprised he hadn't noticed them before.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" she hissed.
"Looking at your breasts," he said blandly.
"What do mean . oh . sorry."
He was delighted to discover that, whatever that twinge had been, apparently it wasn't conscience. Indigestion? There was no reason why he couldn't have a little fun at the same time as doing a friend a favour, was there?
It appeared Hermione hadn't really thought through all the implications of their masquerade despite her brave words about a certain amount of physical contact. He looked forward to enlightening her over the course of the next fortnight. What was the muggle expression? Two birds with one stone
Hermione became increasingly flustered as the evening wore on. Admittedly she had expected a degree of thawing in their relations, but not to the extent that she found herself being ogled over the dinner table like the last lamb chop in the butchers shop. For someone who had been keen on subtlety a few moments ago, he was now behaving with all the tact of a Weasley.
She watched his face, whilst he watched her breathe. He was obviously enjoying himself immensely - and not just by admiring her form. You could almost see the wheels turning in his head. He was a twisty little Slytherin, and just because they were plotting together didn't mean he was suddenly going to turn honest and reliable. He was obviously up to something. Bearing in mind the way he was leering at her, it wasn't too hard to work out what.
The only question was how far he was prepared to take it.
He might just lead her on and make her look foolish or . well, he seemed to have had an affair with every witch below the age of forty, perhaps it was her turn? She had a sudden vision of the cheese counter at the supermarket, where you took a ticket and waited until the number was called out. Only this time the orderly queue was forming up outside Severus's rooms, she had ticket number 189, and there were a lot of witches in the line ahead of her.
Hermione didn't particularly fancy becoming one of his many conquests, she was more the serious relationship sort of girl, but it couldn't be denied that he had a certain something. She had once heard someone remark, rather unkindly she thought, that with a face like that he had to be good in bed. But at least she had never heard that he left a trail of broken hearts behind him. Immensely satisfied witches, yes; weeping women, no.
So she didn't want to be too flirtatious, but on the other hand she definitely had to do something to wipe the smug smile off his face. It would be a mistake to let him think he had the upper hand in any way.
Gazing lovingly into his eyes wouldn't work. He would have to look up to notice what she was doing, and he didn't look like doing that anytime soon. Dinner was drawing to a close, and the other diners were beginning to form chattering groups in the middle of the floor, when she made her move.
She casually rested her hand on his thigh, whilst leaning forward to whisper in his ear, "What time do you want to go to bed then?"
He noticed where her hand was almost immediately. It took several seconds for the fact that she was talking to him sink in, a further few seconds for the implications of what she was saying to register, and even longer for him to come up with a response.
"As soon as possible, I'd say," he said in his silkiest tones.
She just smiled, patted him on the shoulder, and moved off. He watched her hips swaying as she crossed the floor to talk to some friends. At the very least there were going to be some very interesting games during their engagement At the most, well, if Miss Granger played her cards right, he might just let her seduce him after all.
Severus found that dinner passed quickly for once.
They say that time flies when you are having fun, and there was nothing he liked more than a bit of plotting. He thought that if he were a better man he would have felt guilty about using Hermione to pay back the Terrible Two. Fortunately he was relieved to say that he wasn't a better man - it would get in the way of so much that was enjoyable in life. Anyway she seemed to be perfectly happy in the knowledge that their 'relationship' was going to annoy the pair of them. So his conscience, if he had a conscience, was clear.
Hermione had a flair for the dramatic typical of her house, and if she had her way, they would have been snogging in the middle of the Great Hall by the end of the evening.
"You Gryffindors have no subtlety at all," he said scathingly.
"Severus, who the hell are we dealing with?" she replied with asperity. When he looked blank she continued, "Gryffindors. If we faff around with subtlety we will be waiting until next year for anyone to notice."
He hated to admit she had a point. "What about Albus? He's bound to tell everyone we are at it like knives. He'll never be able to resist the temptation to boast about how he knew it was going to happen, and how we are made for each other, and how it is all his doing. He's worse than Trelawney for claiming credit for things that had absolutely nothing to do with him."
"We just swore him to secrecy."
"Bugger."
"Do you have a problem with kissing me? Because we aren't going to get very far if you do. A certain amount of physical contact is necessary you know!"
"That's not the point. You can hardly expect me to change the habits of a lifetime and start snogging in public."
"Shy, Severus?" she mocked. "You certainly didn't seem to mind putting on a show for us all at the Hallowe'en Ball. You can hardly claim that you don't go in for public displays of affection after that!"
He flushed a dull red. "That is completely different. I certainly didn't set out with the intention of being caught in flagrante." It wasn't his idea to have sex in the corridor, but the little witch had been most persuasive. She hadn't taken their subsequent discovery at all well, and still wasn't speaking to him. Not that he was disappointed about that, but it was very annoying to be blamed for something that wasn't his fault, was eminently predictable, and something he had indeed pointed out to her as a likely outcome. At the time, she had considered the possibility had added spice to the encounter. An opinion she changed very rapidly thereafter.
"Although, if you want Ron and Harry to catch you being taken up against a wall I would be happy to arrange it," he said blandly. It was her turn to flush.
"That won't be necessary, thank you," she said primly. "But a little . affection wouldn't be amiss."
Severus raised an eyebrow. "Affection? Me?"
"I am not going to be treated like on of those little tarts that keep hanging round the three of you. I have got more self respect than that."
Severus had the feeling that he was skating on very thin ice. It seemed that at least part of the trouble between the three friends involved their active social lives. He quickly discarded the idea that she was jealous; there had never been anything like that between them. She had likely had to pick up the pieces of some young lade dumped after a one-night-stand once too often and taken them to task for their behaviour. Probably in very forthright language. He could just imagine them being stupid enough to take that for jealousy, and crassly stupid enough to tell her that.
Prats.
Hence, the cooling of the friendship and her sudden desire to get 'engaged'. There was surely little on God's earth more guaranteed to get under the skin of Harry and Ron than the thought of the two of them together.
He felt quite indignant on her behalf. It was beyond shabby to have treated her in that way. Nearly ten years of friendship should have counted for more. He hadn't thought it possible to despise the Terrible Twosome more than he did, but she really deserved better than being given the cold shoulder whatever the reason for the split. She had saved their lives for Merlin's sake!
And as someone who could count the number of living friends on the fingers of one hand, he thought that they were a pair of ungrateful bastards. So he would put on a good show, and demonstrate that someone else appreciated their friend, even if they didn't.
Oh bugger was that a twinge of vermiform conscience?
"Alright," he conceded. "I take your point. What I suggest is, we go our separate ways for the rest of the evening but cast longing glances at each other across a crowded room. If we do that in front of enough people someone is bound to take notice. Word will quickly spread and by the end of the evening everyone will be watching us to see what we do. I will drift over to you trying to look as shifty as possible, and we leave together. You spend the night in my rooms, and I think we can safely rely on the house elves and Albus to do the rest."
"That should do it," she said after a moments thought. "We can always escalate things if people don't take the hint."
"They're thick," he said dryly looking pointedly at her two erstwhile friends, "but they're not that thick. Oh, very well," he said, putting up his hand to forestall any further argument, "a quick peck on the cheek but I'm not holding hands in public. I still have to teach you know, and I'd never hear the end of it."
She had smiled at that, as he had intended her to do. The truth was that any little bleeder that thought they could take advantage of him now he had a sex life was rapidly disabused of the idea. The young lad who had thought it amusing to ask questions about the proper technique for sex against a dungeon wall had regretted the impulse immediately and for a very long time. No one had ever received detention with Filch for an entire year before. He could start wearing pink robes and still terrify a classroom. In fact, merely wearing pink robes would probably be enough on its own.
He found himself admiring her cleavage again. They really were very nice breasts. He was surprised he hadn't noticed them before.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" she hissed.
"Looking at your breasts," he said blandly.
"What do mean . oh . sorry."
He was delighted to discover that, whatever that twinge had been, apparently it wasn't conscience. Indigestion? There was no reason why he couldn't have a little fun at the same time as doing a friend a favour, was there?
It appeared Hermione hadn't really thought through all the implications of their masquerade despite her brave words about a certain amount of physical contact. He looked forward to enlightening her over the course of the next fortnight. What was the muggle expression? Two birds with one stone
Hermione became increasingly flustered as the evening wore on. Admittedly she had expected a degree of thawing in their relations, but not to the extent that she found herself being ogled over the dinner table like the last lamb chop in the butchers shop. For someone who had been keen on subtlety a few moments ago, he was now behaving with all the tact of a Weasley.
She watched his face, whilst he watched her breathe. He was obviously enjoying himself immensely - and not just by admiring her form. You could almost see the wheels turning in his head. He was a twisty little Slytherin, and just because they were plotting together didn't mean he was suddenly going to turn honest and reliable. He was obviously up to something. Bearing in mind the way he was leering at her, it wasn't too hard to work out what.
The only question was how far he was prepared to take it.
He might just lead her on and make her look foolish or . well, he seemed to have had an affair with every witch below the age of forty, perhaps it was her turn? She had a sudden vision of the cheese counter at the supermarket, where you took a ticket and waited until the number was called out. Only this time the orderly queue was forming up outside Severus's rooms, she had ticket number 189, and there were a lot of witches in the line ahead of her.
Hermione didn't particularly fancy becoming one of his many conquests, she was more the serious relationship sort of girl, but it couldn't be denied that he had a certain something. She had once heard someone remark, rather unkindly she thought, that with a face like that he had to be good in bed. But at least she had never heard that he left a trail of broken hearts behind him. Immensely satisfied witches, yes; weeping women, no.
So she didn't want to be too flirtatious, but on the other hand she definitely had to do something to wipe the smug smile off his face. It would be a mistake to let him think he had the upper hand in any way.
Gazing lovingly into his eyes wouldn't work. He would have to look up to notice what she was doing, and he didn't look like doing that anytime soon. Dinner was drawing to a close, and the other diners were beginning to form chattering groups in the middle of the floor, when she made her move.
She casually rested her hand on his thigh, whilst leaning forward to whisper in his ear, "What time do you want to go to bed then?"
He noticed where her hand was almost immediately. It took several seconds for the fact that she was talking to him sink in, a further few seconds for the implications of what she was saying to register, and even longer for him to come up with a response.
"As soon as possible, I'd say," he said in his silkiest tones.
She just smiled, patted him on the shoulder, and moved off. He watched her hips swaying as she crossed the floor to talk to some friends. At the very least there were going to be some very interesting games during their engagement At the most, well, if Miss Granger played her cards right, he might just let her seduce him after all.