Disclaimer: I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion. I wouldn't even want it if I could have it. The album title "In Between Dreams" belongs to Jack Johnson.
In Between Dreams
By: Nanaki BH
Asuka woke Shinji early the next morning. With some sleep, he felt much more at ease. The morning sun filtered through his blinds casting rows of light on the floor. He lay there in his bed for a little while though; apprehensive. Though unlike the night before, Shinji's mind wasn't under the same heavy assault. It was peaceful in his head and he was almost tempted to go back to sleep. After just laying there, staring at his ceiling for five minutes, he decided it would be best to get up and say "hello" to the world he forgot.
He sat up somewhat painfully, as his back refused to realize it was morning. With his back and neck still numb from his restless sleep, he made his way over to his window to look out; the early morning glow caressed every inch of his face. It was just as he remembered it, but the familiar structure reminded him of the eerie dream – of how the apartment couldn't shield him from the daily pain inflicted upon his weary psyche. He would come home hoping for respite, but his soul would receive none…
Shinji leaned forward at the window, resting his arms on the sill. Slowly, he closed his eyes and laid his head in his folded arms. Behind his eyes, he could still see everything that had happened. He remembered vividly the night before though… and he was certainly in his apartment now. He sighed softly. It all was just a dream after all, wasn't it? But how could it have been when everything was so real? Everything; the EVAs, the Angels… Kaworu and Rei… Maybe it was just the new school year freaking him out, he thought.
Maybe it was like the typical fear of "the boogieman". The space his father kept probably led him to feel he was deceiving him in his dream. Asuka was a familiar face, but he didn't know much about her. Misato was still his (very attractive) guiding figure and Rei was the silent new child; just they all were a bit shadier in his dream. And EVA? It gave him purpose. He felt loved; protected in EVA. EVA became the shield for his fears.
He opened his eyes reluctantly, not wanting to go back to school, almost sad it was all a dream now. EVA didn't exist… what was his purpose now? Kaworu didn't exist either. Yet still, he stood and dressed for school, grabbed his school bag, and went to the kitchen to eat breakfast with Asuka.
"Hikari?" he said, surprised to see one of his younger classmates in his kitchen. "What are you doing here?" He blushed, trying his best to straighten out his hair, which was still sticking out in all directions.
She smiled, sipping her cup of tea. "I just decided to walk to school with you guys today. Your apartment's on the way, so I figured it would work out fine, you know?" She put down her tea so she could tug gently on Asuka's apron. "What's taking those eggs so long?"
"I'm not good at cooking," she said, flipping over an egg. "You'll be lucky if they even taste like eggs, okay?"
Shinji smiled, relieved that everything was back to normal. He sat down across from Hikari and stared at the cup of steaming tea before him. "Is this one mine?" he asked. She waved a hand at him, still preoccupied with her cooking.
Breakfast was hardly breakfast as promised. It wasn't really the best way to start off his day, especially after such a fitful night. Even if the food wasn't that great, the company was certainly appreciated. Hikari and Asuka managed to take his mind off of the dream for most of breakfast and for almost the entire walk to school.
Upon entering the classroom, Shinji was tackled by his two best friends Kensuke and Toji. "I still can't believe she's our teacher this year, Shinji!" They wailed together. Shinji found himself blushing deeply, embarrassed that he didn't feel the same way the fawning boys did. They would never find that out though, so long as he kept his silence.
They were right in a sense though. He couldn't believe Misato was their teacher either. Each time he looked up from his books he'd see her at the front of the class, the same Misato from his dreams. He was a little bit disappointed that he wouldn't have the same level of comfort he did around her anymore though. But each time he saw her he would remember that kiss she gave him before she died… and then wonder if he really did feel the way Kensuke and Toji did.
Asuka sat a few seats behind him and every now and then during math, she would throw paper balls at the back of his head. At one point, he actually turned around and managed to catch one right after she threw it. That one was curiously bigger than the other billions of little paper balls she'd thrown. He raised an eyebrow at her and she simply shrugged with a quirky smile on her face. He turned around to face the board again. Cautiously, he looked around to make sure no one else had noticed the note he'd received.
Slowly, he unfolded the note, careful not to make the paper crinkle loud enough for others to hear. "Rei Ayanami is creepy, isn't she?" it read. Rei! He'd completely forgotten about her! He started looking around the room frantically for her. How'd he missed her the whole time?
There, at the back of the classroom, in the far left corner, sat Rei. Her hands were folded politely on her desk, her chin raised in full attention and courtesy. He remembered the day she came to their school; how the other kids didn't want anything to do with her. Maybe it was because she was so… stand-offish. She was quiet, and seemed a little lonely. She was smart though, but for some reason she hadn't spoken that day. It might have been because the other kids didn't like that fact. "Acting like a brainiac" probably didn't put her in too good with the other kids. Now, he noticed, she looked a little sad.
After lunch they were granted a sort of recess. That was when Shinji took his chance to talk to Rei. He wanted to prove the other kids wrong; to prove Asuka wrong especially. He wanted to show them that there was more to Rei. If this Rei was anything like the one in his dream, then there certainly was more to her. Like before, it was a bit difficult to find her though. She seemed to shrink away from attention. That was smart, he decided. If she avoided them for now they wouldn't notice her and that way, she wouldn't be made fun of.
Well, that didn't stop Asuka, did it?
"Rei!" He called, finally spotting her on the front steps. She looked up from the notebook she was writing in. Hastily, she closed the notebook and shoved it into the bag at her side. She didn't respond to him; just sat there and looked at him awkwardly.
"W… What?" She stammered quietly, zipping her book bag.
He waved at her from far away, wanting her to possibly get up and join him and Asuka. It didn't look like she was about to move any time soon though. With every second he stood there, it looked like she was getting even more uncomfortable. "Fine," he muttered, making his way up the steps.
He sat down next to her, but she inched away from him. "S-sorry… just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out with me and Asuka." She didn't say anything. She just sat there quietly, glancing at him from out of the corners of her eyes every now and then. "Really, I'm sorry," he said again apologetically. "If you were working then…"
"No, it's okay," she said quietly and abruptly. Shinji smiled; glad to hear her talk at least. "But… maybe tomorrow."
His face fell. Had she really just turned him down so quickly? He hadn't even been sitting there for too long. He nodded; though he doubted she saw it, as she kept her eyes perpetually forward like an ever obedient student. "That's okay," he said, standing up. "Maybe tomorrow." Maybe in a billion years, he thought.
That's when, for reasons unknown to him, the skies turned from clear to cloudy and rain began to fall. It was like God wanted to match the setting oh-so cruelly to how he felt inside. Shinji looked back up the stairs at Rei. She'd pulled her notebook out of her book bag and was writing again, even though the pages were getting wet. That's when Shinji wondered if school was more important than people; if anything was ever more important than people.
A tear slid down his cheek, but he doubted anyone would ever notice in the rain. The school bell rang for them to come back inside.
Right, he thought, maybe tomorrow.
Author's Notes: Okay, the next part will be Shinji+Kaworu. Oh, will it be angsty. I just thought I would try to fit in some other characters and stuff first so I could set their situation up right. Hope you liked this chapter, so tell me what you think! You guys have got me thinking, but I'm still not big on multichapteral things.