Memory of a Soul
Ailian Rhys
Disclaimer: Need I do this again?
Notes: This is the "big" transitional chapter in the relationship between Rinako and Sess. But it's only the first step.
::laughs:: I'm listening to "One Winged Angel" from FFVII (for the billionth time…). What about the "One Armed Angel"? ^__^ Or even Devil, if you must. ^__^
(And yes, I do like Sephy [FFVII]…I'm a "villain" person. That and I love "creepy" Latin choirs. )
::rereads chapter:: Holy {bleep}! This is about the size of my short stories!!!
Chapter Seven: "Rinako-san."
Azarni yawned, listening to her jaw bone creak in protest. Rolling over on her side she allowed her eyes to open slowly, grumbling irritably at the thin line of light that had somehow found its way to shine on her bed. Was it really that late? She never slept this late in the morning…
But as soon as her eyes opened the young woman found herself staring at a plain shoji wall with dark wood trim instead of the normal bright green of her bedroom. And where were her posters? And computer? As a matter of fact…where was home?
It all came back to her, crushing her like a mental tidal wave. For a moment she couldn't breathe as the image of her sister flashed before her eyes, twisted for all eternity with a look of pure pain on her face. Only to be replaced with the image of a demon, one made of pale moonlight, who stared at her with his frozen sun eyes before turning and walking away in a flurry of snowy hair and robes.
Taking Sachiko away with him…
"No!" she managed to croak hoarsely, leaning forward for him, trying to grasp the last remnants of her sister. She couldn't be gone…
But the demon didn't turn. Instead he vanished as silently as he had come, only to be replaced with Rinako's startled eyes only a foot from her.
"Azarni?"
It was then that the woman noticed that she was sitting straight up in bed, one hand clasping the sheets to her chest as the other stretched out helplessly…to grasp nothing. Rinako knelt at her side with an odd look on her face that looked to be a mix of fear…and guilt?
Azarni allowed her outstretched arm to fall limply in her lap and she drew in a deep calming breath, exhaling slowly. She gazed at Rinako steadily, trying to figure out what was bothering her friend. But the expression was gone from her face soon afterwards, only to be replaced by worry.
"What's the matter, Azarni?"
"I—" she couldn't finish. All she could see was the white outline of Sachiko slowly leaving her again… Sachiko with endlessly long hair of molten silver.
No. Azarni forcefully pushed those thoughts away. She wasn't going to think about that now.
"A bad dream?" Rinako asked cautiously, sitting back on her heels.
Azarni nodded slowly. "Yeah…but it's gone now." She smiled thinly.
Rinako's face was full of compassion. Stretching out a hand towards Azarni's stooped shoulders, she let it hover there. Azarni stared at her a minute before nodding minutely and soon she felt the warm pressure against the thin material of her yukata.
And that snapped her back to reality. The ghostly image of her sister was gone completely. At least for a time.
"Why has this happened?" she murmured sadly, her cheek coming to rest against Rinako's hand.
The fingers under her cheek clenched, griping her shoulder more tightly. "I don't know…" Rinako's voice sounded far away, like her mind was wandering. But Azarni didn't really mind. She just needed a solid, physical presence in this now titled world she was living in. Rinako was there and would always be, no matter where her mind wandered.
But still, Azarni could not help but to wonder what was bothering her friend so. Had something happened while she'd been asleep? But hadn't Rinako been asleep too?
Azarni lifted her head and peered at Rinako closely as the other woman stared out into the middle distance. Something was clearly bugging her; Azarni could see just see the thoughts flashing behind her eyes. Yet, what disturbed Azarni the most was Rinako's grim appearance. Her lips were pressed in a firm line and there was an air of fear about her that anyone could see that she was desperately trying to hide.
Pushing her own troubles back for a moment, Azarni asked, quietly. "What's the matter?"
Rinako jumped in surprise, eyes snapping back to fix on Azarni with a half-fearful, half-guilty expression. Her eyebrows quickly drew down in puzzlement, the other emotions filtering away. "Wrong?" Azarni caught the faint hesitation in her tone and knew that she was trying to hide something.
She glared at the dark-haired woman, some of her spirit returning with a challenge. "Yes, wrong. And I can tell Rinako. It's all over you're face!"
Rinako looked down at her knees, contemplation etched on her face. "I…suppose you would." She shrugged then, almost nonchalantly except for the sudden stiffness in her expression. "It's nothing really. Nothing you should worry about, anyway."
"Rinako…" Azarni warned, drawing herself up to sit straight before her friend. "I want to know."
The woman glanced at her, eyes troubled. "Are you sure…after all this…"
Azarni put a wavering smile over the chill she felt in her heart. "If it'll help you, then of course. You've done so much for me already…"
Rinako gave her a hesitant grin in return, which quickly disappeared when she started speaking. "Well…it's just that when you were sleeping I was…well, reading…Sachiko's journal," she trailed off, watching Azarni uncertainly.
Azarni kept up her brave façade even as a thrill of fear raced down her spine. What had she read that would upset her so? She nodded, telling Rinako to continue.
"And…well, it was a bit eerie. Put me on edge…like a horror novel… Because you see—" she faltered slightly. "Well, Sachiko was reliving…well past experiences. And some were a bit…surprising…"
"Such as?"
Rinako blinked at her, taken aback. Her eyes wandered over to her futon for a moment before returning to Azarni. She wet her lips quickly before chewing on her bottom lip. "Sachiko…when you played with her…she called you after the demon's half-brother. Inu-Yasha," she reminded as Azarni stared at her. As if she wouldn't remember Sachiko racing after her through the house, trampling the couch when she climbed over it, as she called out, "Get back here, Inu-Yasha!" And then how, giggling, Azarni would stop and give her a fake growl. And how Mama would only shake her head with the warm-hearted smile of a mother when the two would do their pretend 'battles' that should have only been for little boys.
But to find out that all that was real…that it had happened to Sachiko before…. No, it didn't make sense…it…
"You mean to say…that that…thing…it was…that all that… Everything was real?"
Rinako nodded slowly. "Yes."
"I always thought she made it up!"
"No…All of it was real. At least all that I know of…"
Azarni was desperate. She came very close to clasping her hands together to beg, but stopped herself. They're had to be another answer…. "But what if she's making up the stuff in the journal?" she asked hopefully, inwardly cringing at the slight to her sister.
Rinako shook her head, decisively even as she picked nervously at the hem of her yukata. "No, Azarni. I think it's all true." She hesitated a moment before continuing. "How else do we explain the creature we've seen? With our own eyes at that. I don't think it's just a figment of our imagination."
Azarni bit her lip, knawing at the flesh relentlessly as she squeezed her eyes shut. She didn't want Rinako to make sense. Didn't want her to be right. But she did. And she was. And there was nothing Azarni could do about it.
She sighed softly, looking down at her hands. "I just don't understand how Sachiko could be turned into something like that…"
"Actually…" Rinako started with a voice that was quieter than usual. Azarni looked up to see her friend frowning lightly, staring back at her futon. She turned to face Azarni before continuing. "I think Sesshoumaru came before Sachiko, Azarni."
"But…"
Rinako cut her off. "If you think about it, it makes sense. The old palace, the outfits. This is some sort of creature from the past…but how was Sachiko linked to him?" she finished with a quiet, musing tone, her hand coming up to rub her chin. As she stared out into the distance Azarni stared at her.
The door being shoved open behind them with a sharp snap immediately interrupted the relative quiet of the room. Both girls jumped nearly a foot in the air as if the noise had snapped the tension spring that had been in the room. Rinako spun around to face the intruder.
A middle-aged woman stood in the doorway, carrying a pile of fabric over one shoulder while she balanced a tray in her hands. Grumbling irritably about 'so many damned people here and no one to help me', she shuffled into the room. Almost immediately her foot slipped out and shoved the door closed, efficiently stopping all ideas of escaping.
Both girls watched with mouths agape as the woman plunked down the tray—which they saw held bowls of rice and chopsticks—on a small table and then turned to them.
"All right then," she barked with a gruff voice. "This is your supper. Eat hearty, girls."
Azarni openly stared at the woman. She's forgotten there were normal people here. Rinako seemed to be as shocked as she was and only stared at the woman dumbly.
The lady sneered, which contrasted sharply with her flowery kimono. "Are you both stupid or what? I ain't got all day, y'know!"
Rinako rose first, standing unsteadily on her feet and almost falling over again. But she managed to steady herself and turned to Azarni, offering her a hand. Sh excepted readily, pulling herself up. They crossed the room and the woman angrily pointed at the two bowls of rice.
"Eat it. And be quick about it!"
"Why?" Rinako asked curiously as they sat down at the table. Azarni gave her friend a dark look that was clear said 'don't push it'. But Rinako only smiled charmingly at the woman, her fear seeming to be gone. Azarni took the chance to glance down at her rice, poking at it with her chopstick to see if it wasn't poisoned or something. It smelled like rice. It looked like rice. Not being an expert by any means at detecting poison she decided that it had to be only rice.
Azarni had just put a mouthful of food in her mouth when the scowling woman finally answered Rinako. She looked very unhappy to be asked the question at all.
"You," she spat, nearly jamming her stubby finger in Rinako's face. "Are gonna go see the Master."
Azarni stopped chewing instantly and her eyes grew wider than the bowl. Panicked she looked at Rinako who was now as pale as a bleached sheet.
"M-master?" she asked timidly.
The woman rolled her eyes. "Young one's these days," she grumbled. Pinning her watery blue gaze back on Rinako she finally cleared up the matter. "Yeah, the Master. Sesshoumaru-sama."
Azarni almost choked on her rice. After a minute of coughing and sputtering—in which no one helped her—she managed to get it down. "WHAT?" she cried, whirling to face Rinako.
The young woman looked petrified. Her dark eyes were large enough for the whole moon to reflect in them. After a moment her mouth started moving as if she wanted to speak but no sound came out.
"Got somethin' for you to wear too," the older woman continued, completely unfazed. She threw the bundle over her shoulder down at Rinako's side. It unfurled itself slightly to show that it was a chocolate brown kimono decorated with white cranes. "Ryoichi said for you to wear this. Something about not wearing a kimono that smells like Sachiko or somethin'. I didn't really listen to him."
Azarni was confused. Why did it matter if they smelled like Sachiko or not? That was when her memories kicked in. She remembered Sachiko claiming that she could smell things others couldn't when she was playing ''demon''.
"That means that thing is just like Sachiko's demon…" she breathed, chest tightening.
The old woman looked at her like she was daft. "What crazy talk is that?"
"You can't go!" Azarni continued, ignoring her. She reached over to touch Rinako but stopped when her friend didn't even turn to look at her movement. "I remember all that Sachiko used to babble on about. It…isn't safe…"
"This whole place isn't safe," Rinako finally spoke up, her voice miles away. "But maybe…" she stopped, shaking her head. She seemed to come back to herself as she turned to face the woman. "How soon do I have to go?"
"After dinner and you're dressed."
Rinako nodded resolutely, turning almost mechanically back to the table and picking up her chopsticks. She stared blankly down at the rice.
"Rinako…" Azarni pleaded softly.
Rinako looked up at her. Azarni noticed that her eyes were shining with fear. "It's not like I can just say no…"
Azarni nodded, staring down at her own food with a burning sense of dread. This was all becoming such a nightmare…
*
This can't be happening. This can't be happening. No way in hell this is happening… Those thoughts kept running through Rinako's head like a whirlwind as the old lady who'd brought dinner nearly pushed her down the hallway towards the back of the palace. Rinako was glad that she hadn't eaten much of her dinner. She was sure it would have been up and on the floor by now. There seemed to be butterflies with steel wings flying around in her stomach…
The sun was just starting to set now, casting thick beams of light across the paper walls. A few managed to through some of the open windows to spread what should have been a cheery shine across the dark polished floor. Little puffs of dust rose to dance slowly in the glow. A few servants in kimono moved past them, openly staring. It all painted a picture of a time long ago. And Rinako would have loved to be here.
Except for the fact that she was a prisoner. And that she was now on her way to a demon.
It felt like forever until the woman forced her to halt before a thick door. The whole way there Rinako kept looking around for Ryoichi or maybe even that Yayoi person. Someone who could stop this. But no one of importance showed his or her face. There were only the scuttling servants who were there and then gone a second later like insects. And there was no chance to run. The lady behind her had a grip like steel it seemed.
"Here we are," said woman grunted. She roughly pushed down on Rinako's arm and she had to kneel under the assault. To her surprise the woman came down beside her. She reached up slowly to tap on the door. "Sesshoumaru-sama. Your guest."
Rinako drew in a quick breath. It felt as if her heart was going to pound through her ribs, it was pumping so hard. Thin trickles of sweat started to roll down the back of her neck, feeling cold in the draft in the hallway now that her hair had been pulled up in what the woman said was a respectful knot on the back of her head. Her knees quaked underneath her.
The time it took until the door was open was an eternity. But as soon as it did Rinako felt her skin instantly turn cold. She glanced up in spite of herself.
"Hello, Rinako," a rather familiar young man stated, giving her the beginnings of a smile.
"Ryoichi…" she breathed. Her shoulders sagged. "I thought—"
"That Sesshoumaru-sama wanted to see you?" he finished, his voice becoming oddly quiet.
Rinako nodded slowly, feeling her shoulders knotting up again. "Yes…"
"Well he does."
The young woman stared up at Ryoichi, wishing that she were standing. "But…but what are you…?"
"Tori."
That cold voice cut through Rinako like a knife. She froze instantly, wanting nothing more than to inch backwards.
The man in the doorway turned slightly and bowed. His expression was unnaturally stiff. "Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama. Forgive me." Turning back to Rinako he held out a hand. "Come along now."
Rinako stared at the proffered hand as if it would bite her. This was it…he was right in the other room. She'd heard him. That…creature was right there behind a paper wall…
Ryoichi jerked his hand a few times. "Come along now, Rinako-san," he repeated tightly, giving her a strained smile. Rinako snapped out of her little funk, hesitantly raising her hand to grasp his. There was nothing she could do to stop this. Maybe if she were good enough she'd live through it…
As soon as her hand touched his Ryoichi had her on her feet. Dismissing the woman who still knelt, he escorted Rinako inside and closed the door. Rinako immediately shut her eyes, not wanting to see the demon right away. She wasn't ready…
There wasn't a sound in the room. Her curiosity getting the better of her Rinako slowly opened her eyes, taking in the chamber. It was gorgeous, with painted walls and breathtaking calligraphy scrolls. There was a wide futon underneath the one window that was perfectly made. There wasn't even a wrinkle. There were cabinets like the ones in her room, except that these were better made and were coated heavily with shellac. But despite the beauty it appeared as if no one actually lived here. It was more like a museum than a room someone was actually staying in. Sure, it had only been a day, but shouldn't there at least be some sign of life? A wrinkle in the bedding from something being placed down on it? Maybe even a door that hadn't been shut all the way?
How about someone actually in the room? Glancing around in what she hoped was a discreet manner, Rinako could see no sign whatsoever of the demon. He just wasn't there.
What, is he invisible or something?
That thought sent a thrill of fear down her spine and Rinako went to turn and glance longingly at the door. Ryoichi stopped her, turning her to face away from the bed and drawers to the open door on the other side of the room. That's where she found her unexpected host, standing out on the veranda with his back to both of them. He didn't even turn as Ryoichi gently pushed her forward although Rinako could have sworn that his ear twitched slightly.
"Here she is, Sesshoumaru-sama," Ryoichi stated stiffly, his hold on her arm tightening. Rinako went to look at him but found that she couldn't take her eyes off of the white-clad creature in front of her. Oddly enough, some small part of her mind told her that the sight of his back, with its long hair rippling lightly in the light evening breeze, was vaguely familiar.
Rinako was about to think that on some off chance he hadn't heard Ryoichi speak when suddenly he had spun around and was facing her. The setting sun reflected off of the one sword at his side, making Rinako take a step back almost involuntarily. Molten gold eyes watched her intently but she couldn't tell what was behind them. Rinako expected for her heart to start pounding in fear again but for some reason it was still. The situation was almost surreal, with a little voice whispering in her mind. You know him…
"Rinako-san," he greeted at last with a placid tone. Rinako felt Ryoichi immediately tense up beside her, inadvertently jerking her arm.
"S—Sesshoumaru-sama…" she managed to squeak out, trying to bow properly but Ryoichi's hold stopped her. She lifted her eyes to look at him and saw that Ryoichi wore an expression of pure shock on his face. Confused and starting to become afraid Rinako lifted her gaze back to the creature in the doorway and saw that the gold eyes were now pinned on Ryoichi. If possible the demon looked displeased.
"Tori." The tone was an obvious warning.
And Ryoichi noticed it. The hand on her arm disappeared and he stammered. "Of course, S-Sesshoumaru-sama."
Rinako felt very alone now without the feel of Ryoichi's hand on her arm. She might as well be standing before the demon alone…
She almost fainted at Sesshoumaru's next order. "Leave us."
Ryoichi spluttered to life beside her. "I…She…" he trailed off, falling silent. "As you wish it," he finished, sounding defeated. Rinako could only stand like a petrified tree as Ryoichi's footsteps sounded against the wooden floor, drawing farther and farther away from her…
She almost had a heart attack when the door clicked shut behind him.
Thick silence fell like fog between the two occupants of the room. Rinako kept her eyes focussed on the floor, not daring to look up. She felt eyes on her, studying her almost like a specimen under a microscope. Never in all her life had she ever wanted to disappear more than this moment. Her legs shook and her palms were cold and clammy. Her mind was blank, only focussed on uncomfortable fear.
The examination felt as if it took ten times longer than the previous one that day on the stairs. But at last he spoke. "Come outside with me," there was a millisecond of a pause that could almost be hesitation. "Rinako-san." There wasn't really an ordering tone to his voice. Actually it was rather plain, not cold or commanding. Just a simple statement. Yet Rinako assumed that it was pretty much an order.
Swallowing to try to soothe her newly dry throat she took a few hesitant steps forward before looking up. He'd moved to the side in the doorway as if to make room for her to pass, watching her approach. Rinako felt vaguely like a model on the runway.
Her feet were like iron as she moved ungracefully forward. Her shoes clunked far to loudly on the wood, her breathing was like an elephant gasping for breath. Rinako noticed a faint chill in the air that she didn't think was the wind. It seemed to creep over her skin as if testing for something. She hadn't really paid attention to it when Ryoichi had been there but it was strong now. Yet as she moved closer to the demon before her the feeling seemed to fade away, melting into something that seemed almost…accepting. This change in the atmosphere caused her heart rate to start to slow down. By the time she came upon the door she felt a bit less terrified than before.
When Rinako placed one foot on the threshold the demon beside her turned and moved out on the veranda. Rinako followed. There was a tatami mat only steps away and he made a sharp gesture towards it. Rinako sat obediently. There was silence as she looked out over the surrounding garden. It stretched back a fair distance towards a line of trees behind which rose the side of a mountain. She couldn't tell exactly how far back the stone was, but it was close enough to enclose the area. The garden itself had a few large maple trees, a few willows, and a row of what she supposed were cherry trees. There was a pond and flowerbeds, all of which were cast in the glow of the sun that was peaking over the mountain wall. It was a majestic sight that would have been perfect if it weren't for the creature standing just behind her.
There was a whisper of silk behind her and white appeared in the corner of her eye. Rinako tensed. A bird called out in the distance, it's cry seeming to echo through the stillness of the night.
"Who are you?"
Rinako's whole body jerked as she was taken by surprise. But it wasn't the voice that frightened her, just the abruptness. There was nothing daunting in his tone any longer. It was nothing more than a simple statement.
What does he mean by that? Rinako's brow furrowed in thought but she dared not turn to face him. Yet, apparently, her confusion was shown through her silence because he elaborated. "Tell me about yourself."
Rinako blinked, finally understanding. Then her heart started to pound. Wait a minute…why does he want to know about me?
Then, as an afterthought: And why had he called me by that little girl's name?
"A-about me?' she stammered, hands clutching the thick material in her lap. She heard him move behind her again and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck jump up. She wished he wouldn't stand out of her line of sight like that. It was like she was being hunted… But she forced down the need to get up and run. She was going to get this figured out.
"Yes."
There really was nothing else she could do, was there? Here she was on an outside porch with an expanse of clear garden ahead of her. In any other circumstance she would have made a run for it. Yet she wasn't about to forget the ice-cold demon with two swords that stalked behind her. Certainly he could throw one of those things at least, even if he didn't run after her. She'd seen it done in movies and she wasn't about to think that something that simple couldn't happen, considering what had happened to her.
Besides, what trouble would it be to talk about herself? He knew her name already. Might as well give him her birthday, address, and telephone number. In case he wanted to call her. Maybe even tell him her doctor so he could send a card after her upcoming heart attack.
You're loosing it. She warned herself silently. As if it wasn't obvious enough.
But not only that.
She was trapped. Completely.
Not knowing what else to do, Rinako heaved an inaudible defeated sigh before starting her story. "My full name is Mirawase Rinako."
Sesshoumaru half-leaned against the paper walls of the house—he didn't trust it with his full weight—and watched the young woman who knelt on the mat. Her shoulders were set under the material of her kimono and he could smell and even taste her fear. It was obvious to even a most asinine of observers that she was uncomfortable, let alone terrified.
Yet the very fact that she could sit with her back to him as he had arranged was a lofty feat indeed.
Something only Rin would have been able to do.
Golden eyes narrowed in half-suspicion, Sesshoumaru studied the girl even more intently than he had done earlier, trying to see exactly what made him remember that long-dead girl.
Never having been one to dream beyond the bounds of what he knew to be possible, as well as probable, the taiyoukai would have normally dismissed this idea as nonsense. Except for the fact that he never doubted his instincts. And they were telling him that, on some level, this Rinako was Rin.
He was a creature of routine. That was how most youkai were; it was a sign of long years. And to his instincts, even to his own mind now, the routine was to have that little human child running about his feet. And now he was here, almost as if he had not been dead in the first place. (Sesshoumaru would have easily claimed that he hadn't been killed, except for the small fact that when he had awoken the whole world had changed.) And that little girl, that major player in his habits, was gone. Simple vanished.
Granted, the toad was gone as well but for a reason that he could not fathom—nor did he wish to—Sesshoumaru found himself more disturbed by the missing child. Perhaps it was because she had been such a recent addition?
Whatever the reason…he could not lie to himself and say that the young human in front of him was not fascinating at the very least. Such falsehoods were not the way of the lord Sesshoumaru. And so, yes, he was curious. This whole new era interested him just as much as it disgusted him.
A bird cried out in the garden and Sesshoumaru inadvertently lifted his head to search out the sound. Hmm… he had not heard that creature for some time…
The taiyoukai mentally scolded himself for his inattention. Ridiculous, getting distracted so…
But that was what this girl was doing to him…
How could one look so much like one long since dead? This human…her face bore much of the same shape as that little girl had, although now it had lost a great deal of its childishness, the sign of a human bearing more years. Yet he had noticed other differences. Subtle things simple humans would never detect; the width of the nose, thickness of eyelashes, certain facial blemishes. Her chin was rounder than Rin's had been, the mouth not as wide. Her ears were more oval than round, her hair was a shade or two darker and of a finer texture. Small details that sometimes a youkai needed to rely upon when the time came to claim their property.
And then there was her scent. An inuyoukai's olfactory memory was the last memory to fail even after thousands of years. Or in this case, it was the very first to return. He had known at once that the earth reeked of foul things he had not known even before he had truly remembered who he was. For places, people, even times were categorized and engraved in all their complexity in the forefront of his mind.
Therefore, there was no mistaking that this Rinako held a scent similar to Rin's…but not quite. Rin had always been buried in the scent of a multitude of wildflowers and the smell of sun-touched skin. Underneath that, however, had lain a sweet odor just bordering on saccharine. Somewhat similar to her own flower one could suppose, although Sesshoumaru did not generally enjoy thinking so poetically. Poetry was for those whom had the time and useless, unneeded wit to spare.
There had also been the slow decay and bitter perspiration that every human reeked of. No matter how many fields the child had run through, no mater how much his own scent had rubbed off on her, that debasing stench had never disappeared…
But now…this Rinako. Sesshoumaru focussed his attention on the young woman before him, who remained still with her gaze fixed into the middle distance. She was holding up rather well under the unintentional test of strength and patience. Although her fear was still the utmost sense about her. Either to the olfactory senses or just plain visual. After that was a layer of some astringent substance he seemed to notice on all of the creatures around here. Whatever it was, it stung the back of his throat whenever he breathed too much of it in and it seemed to tear into the fine nasal cavities his sense of smell relied upon. It was starting to become rather tedious, trying to fight off the constant irritation this acidic stench caused to his sinuses. Add that to the reek of humans that the wind was always full of…it was enough to make him wish he did not have such a strong ability.
Yet, underneath the acidity, just above the human decay, there was a ground scent. One that was sweet, just bordering on saccharine. A saccharine tinged with a sense of dankness, of captivity. The scent of a trapped flower.
Sesshoumaru inadvertently frowned. Someone who was so similar to that carefree child should not have such a feeling associated with her. Rin was a wild little thing; not someone caged down as this Rinako apparently was.
But what chained her so?
His curiosity getting the better of him—much to his ultimate dismay—Sesshoumaru posed a question to the young woman, asking, in a sense, what he truly wished to know. Who was she?
When she did not answer directly, he unwittingly indulged her in an elaboration. He barely comprehended that he was being overtly lenient, as her fear was stirred up again and that captured his attention.
Rinako fell into silence.
As she continued to stare out into the darkening sky Sesshoumaru began to reconsidered the honor he had given her. It was not often that he addressed anyone, omitting his fellow youkai lords, with formality. Especially a human.
Yet that was one manner of cajoling information from a weaker creature without harm. Fool it with a false sense of respect. It was a skill his father had taught him years ago, although Sesshoumaru had not indulged in mind and wordplay often. It was degrading, having to wheedle those weaker than you.
However, as he had awaited her presence, Sesshoumaru had believed that such a tactic would work. And, oddly enough, he had found it much less troublesome to treat her so than he had at first predicted. But now it seemed that such honor was completely unfounded, even on false terms. Was the woman mute? Was it truly that difficult to comprehend such a simple task?
Even as he thought this something pulled on his senses and Sesshoumaru looked up at the line of sky he could see between the edge of the roof and the peak of the distant mountains. He sniffed once, letting his senses play with the atmosphere around him, before becoming thoughtful.
It was going to rain soon…
Did it still rain in this time then? True water? Or that poison he sensed in the atmosphere?
Perhaps it did. The earth was changed after all; he could feel it... It was wounded, it seemed…
"My full name is Mirawase Rinako."
Sesshoumaru blinked, his senses reeling in like a whip. In such surprise was he that he even turned to face the human woman who knelt at his side.
When had he forgotten about her?
Biting back an accusative growl, he silently berated himself. Truly pathetic, this newfound wanderings of his. Especially now, when he needed his full awareness. No one here was trustworthy, even in the slightest degree. Not even that mongrel tori was unsuspicious.
And here he was, the great lord Sesshoumaru, allowing his attention to wander after rain clouds. How debasing. And aggravating. No matter how much he worked on his focus it did not seem to be working. Something that came so naturally was escaping him…truly pathetic.
"I am eighteen now. I lived in Tokyo all my life…but I don't have any siblings."
"I attend Tokyo University…but I don't think you'll know what that is," Rinako angled her head to hopefully see behind her but all she could see was her own hair. Cursing inwardly she fumbled around in her mind for something else to say. "It's a school. An expensive school. I haven't even been there a full year yet and…well. I can't really be going now, can I?"
She tried a fake laugh but found that her throat was far too dry. She swallowed harshly. There wasn't a sound behind her but she knew he was still there simply by the fact that she still wanted to run.
"Err…" she flounder for something to say. What could he possibly want to know about her anyway? " Well…I'm…I was taking courses in nursing. I want to be a nurse when I grow up, like 'Kaa-san."
Just thinking about her mother made Rinako's chest tighten. It hadn't been that long ago that she had died. Two years. And ever since then…she'd felt empty. Like something was missing. Sure, 'Kaasan had always been extremely busy at the hospital and oftentimes she had found herself home alone and waiting, but Rinako couldn't help but love the woman anyway. She had been the only family Rinako had had… excluding Azarni and her parents, but that just hadn't been the same.
The young woman looked down at her hands, clasped firmly in the folds of a rich kimono skirt. She couldn't help but wonder what her mother would do now if she knew where her daughter was. Would she be trying to save her? Perhaps, if she had a home to go to then someone would have noticed her missing…
Or would she had noticed at all…
Rinako gasped softly as something cold landed on her entwined fingers. Focussing on the present instead of the past, she noticed the small drop of water that slid down the back of her left hand. It was soon followed by another. Rinako bit her lip as soon as she realized that she was crying. The tears were creeping down her face like cold fingers, reddening her skin as they fell. She hesitated a moment before slowly raising one hand to try to push them away.
A voice stopped her.
"Why do you weep, human?"
The young woman felt a shudder run through her and she almost choked on the lump that formed in her throat. "Because I'm lonely…" she whispered in a crackling voice. She closed her eyes, trying to dam the tears but the little traitors slipped through her eyelashes.
She just couldn't keep it in any longer…
The voice spoke again, nearer this time as if he was leaning over her. "What are you speaking of? How can you be 'lonely'?" He actually sounded generally curious, the curiosity taking away the normal biting tone she had heard before. So much so that for a minute she forgot who it was. And she actually thought that he cared.
So she told him.
Azarni hadn't been able to understand. Rinako had tried, those few years ago, to talk to her best friend. But it had been a lost endeavor. A few uncomfortable words of sympathy had been all that Azarni had been able to give her.
That was because Azarni didn't know what it was like to grown up without a father. To not even know whom the man was. Azarni didn't have a mother who nearly had to work herself to death to support you. She didn't understand what it was like to have to come home to an empty house and wait. To never be able to do things other kids could because it was too expensive, to not have things other kids did. To have your mother miss your important play at school. To have to hitch a ride after school because 'Kaa-san had to work late.
To love the woman anyway despite the faults.
Sure, Rinako had gone over to Azarni's house many days during the week to have a sort-of home environment. And she had had fun with the other girls. She'd been able to do a few things other kids could do with the Yamashita family. But that wasn't the same, especially when she had to walk home some afternoons to her small apartment and find her mother still at work. Being in the bustle of the Yamashita hadn't made her forget what she was missing with her own 'Kaa-san.
"And now she's gone. And I miss her. And I mourn all the time we weren't able to spend together. And now I have no family left…I'm alone."
Rinako drew in a quavering breath as tears continued to track down her face. She opened her eyes slowly and saw the blurry image of a railing in front of her. She was bewildered for a long moment before she remembered where she was.
And who she was with.
Rinako felt her heartbeat speed up to an alarming rate as she panicked. Her hand fell from her lap to search for the ground in order to push herself up. She didn't want to be here anymore. What was she thinking, getting lost in her thoughts as she'd done? It was so dangero—
Her thoughts trailed off when her fingers touched silk. Glancing down she found her fist clutching a shimmering white fabric that lay spread over the tatami mat that she knelt on. With a feeling of dread welling up inside her gut Rinako's eyes slowly trailed up the white fabric to notice that part of it was draped over a leg clad in a pure white hakama directly beside her.
Almost on instinct Rinako looked up and noted the long curtain of ivory hair that lay like spilled liquid around the demon's shoulders. And that his eyes were closed, his expression calm. And that his skin seemed to shine in the last vestiges of the sun…
That, and the fact that he was right next to her.
Before she could fully panic the demon seemed to realize that she was looking at him. He opened his eyes, turning his head slightly to look at her. They were still cold, impersonal, but for some reason Rinako couldn't explain, it didn't scare her. She just continued to stare at him, not really understanding anything. Only that there was a tiny part of her that was trying to tell her something…but she just couldn't hear it.
"You are finished now, Rinako-san?" Such soft words…words that made that little voice start to shout louder. But Rinako just couldn't understand what it was telling her…
"Hai…" she breathed.
Her mind was lost... All she could do was stare at the white vision beside her and wonder…Did I really just pour my heart out to him? This specter of austerity, of coldness…of death.* To this barren yet beautiful devil. Rinako couldn't help but notice how everything about him seem to gleam in the dying light. Or how his eyes, despite their coldness, reflected the sun like it was their own inner light. The shine of an animal's eyes…but it was still beautiful.
The two stared at each other in silence, one in awe and the other thoughtful. The taiyoukai looked away after a time, gazing up at the dark-blue sky. Only to be disappointed to see no stars yet. At least no stars in their full glory, as he had known them. There were only faint little lights behind the cloudy sky.
His movement awoke Rinako from her stupor. "Why?" The young woman broke the silence with a trembling, feeble voice.
Her only answer was silence.
Rinako followed his gaze upward towards the sky, wondering what held his interest so.
She, too, was disappointed by the lack of stars.
"A soul such as yours should not feel such pain."
Rinako whirled to face the demon beside her. He did not look at her, keeping his gaze fixated on the darkness above. She stared at him openly until her eyes narrowed in thought. A certain name came to mind then, an image of her own.
"I remind you of someone, don't I?"
Silence. Long strands of pristine hair blew between them, whirling like spider-threads in the wind. Rinako could have sworn that it made his face look softer.
"Sesshoumaru-sama?"
The demon beside her closed his golden eyes. "You may go now."
Rinako didn't know what to feel. On one side she was happy to have a chance to leave the frightening demon behind. But the other…it did not find him frightening. Actually, it felt a sort of closeness to him…. He had listened to her after all….
Rinako hesitated.
"I do not repeat myself, Rinako-san."
Swallowing the lump in her throat Rinako bowed low. "Arigatou gozaimasu, Sesshoumaru-sama."
The demon acknowledged her leave-taking with only a stiff nod. Rinako rose to her feet slowly, watching him as she did so. He didn't move an inch the whole time, even when she hesitated at the doorframe.
It was then that the young woman perceived something, seeing his stark-white profile contrasting so sharply with the lacquered woodwork and the dark garden beyond. He was so out of place. Not only physically, but mentally as well. A being from an ancient time thrown into her world. And, she supposed, he had to be as lost as she was. If not more so.
And she pitied him for it.
"Oyasumi gozaimasu," she whispered, kindly, before stepping into the room beyond. She crossed the room without looking back, lost in thought.
Yet, as she left the room and stepped out into the hallway, Rinako realized something that made her freeze. Somewhere in the span of a few minutes, she had somehow stopped seeing that monster…as a monster.
-
"Oyasumi gozaimasu."
Turning his head slightly, Sesshoumaru watched the girl leave. He waited, listening to her footsteps along the wooden floor of his room until the door was pushed open and then closed again.
When she was gone the taiyoukai faced the sky again, which was slowly darkening into night. Sniffing almost unconsciously, he caught her scent as it faded away from the mat beside him. He looked down to where she had been and allowed a thoughtful frown to mar his normally stoic expression.
There was no doubt now. As soon as the young woman had began to speak to him, telling him such thoughts and emotions that was normally left for close confidantes, he had noticed that her trapped scent had evaporated. And in its place was left a fragrance unmistakably…Rin's.
And, strangely enough, what he had told her was true.
His Rin did not deserve such pain.
Reincarnated or not.
*
Natsuko tapped her fingers restlessly against her jean-clad thigh, glancing around the elevator almost guiltily. The other two people in there with her, both women, didn't seem to notice her nervous jitters.
But that didn't mean that Natsuko had to put up with them.
She willed her fidgeting to stop and soon her fingers stopped and curled into the material of her jacket. Unconsciously, the young woman looked up to the ceiling, where she knew a security camera had to be. She didn't like it being there. It set her on edge.
Although she happened to forget that she wasn't doing anything wrong. She worked here! She was allowed to ride in the elevator. Sure, she hadn't been to work yesterday, but she was allowed to take a day off once in a while, right?
And besides, she reminded herself, that camera can only see what's on the surface. You certainly don't look like a cat now.
Natsuko went back to her nervous fidgeting, this time with her foot tapping on the steel floor of the lift. The young brunette next to her sent her an annoyed look. Natsuko glared back. She was about to open her mouth to give that little bitch a piece of her mind when the elevator gave a dainty ding.
Looking up at the numbers overhead Natsuko realized that it was her floor and she pushed past the woman to exit the elevator. But not before stepping on the bitch's foot.
It was a familiar hallway, white-washed to the very trim. The floor was made up of dusky gray tile. All in all it was a rather drab sight. Natsuko never did understand why medical facilities had to be so severe. A bit of color in life sure helped a lot.
Swinging her briefcase as she walked Natsuko took the same old path down the hall, around the corner, and then stopping before a door like any other door in the hall. Not even bothering to knock she opened it and went in.
It was an office with a desk to one side and cases of books on the other. Multiple doors lined the wall behind the desk, each one closed tight at such a late hour. It wasn't a very clean office though. There were books scattered across the desk and a few old scrolls were tucked into a half-open drawer. But it was neater than usual…
Stepping into the room Natsuko plopped her briefcase on a small space of clear desk near the desk-light. Leaning over the edge she started to push the disorderly books into some semblance of a straight pile.
"Sensei?"
There wasn't a reply. Sighing dramatically Natsuko circled the desk and approached one of the closest doors. Rapping sharply on the white surface with her knuckles Natsuko called through the wood. "Oi! Sensei. What the fuck you doin' that you can't come see me? You insisted that I be here on time, you know!"
Just as she was about the hit the door again her target was gone and in it's place stood a short man wearing a skewed lab coat. There was a multitude of papers jammed in his pockets, anything from old spell papers to pages ripped from the encyclopedia. His glasses sat on top of his disheveled black hair. He glared up at her through bleary brown eyes, his heavy-set face looking tired and annoyed. "Care to be more polite next time, Natsuko?"
The young woman made a face, stepping back into the office. "And I'd suggest you brush your teeth soon, sensei. You're breath is enough to fell a youkai!"
As expected, Natsuko was able to get away with that shot for as soon as she mentioned 'youkai' all other thoughts fled his mind. The doctor came into the office and closed the door behind him, an almost eager look on his face. He looked like a kid waiting for candy.
"So, did it work?"
Natsuko snorted, blowing some of her hair out of her face. "What the fuck d'ya think, sensei? Why else would I be here at this ungodly hour? I usually work day shift, remember?"
His tired eyes were alive instantly. "So…you're saying that we now have a full-fledged youkai in our midst?"
Natsuko nodded, moving over to where she'd set her briefcase. "Yep. It was a sight, when he popped out of the ground. A big fucker of a dog, I tell you."
The young woman held out her files to the doctor who grabbed the case from her instantly. He anxiously pulled out the papers as Natsuko explained.
"Some are only sketches. I couldn't exactly have a camera, y'know. Yayoi would've noticed pretty damn quick. And I don't think the taiyoukai would have liked being blinded by a flash. Might've bit my head off."
The doctor made a few half-hearted nods as he backed towards his desk. Using one hand he felt around for the rolling chair before sinking down into it. Pushing the books Natsuko had recently arranged to the side with a hasty shove he spread the files over the desk. Staring up at the ceiling were now two detailed sketches of Sesshoumaru, in both forms.
"Wonderful…" he breathed, eyes glued to the drawings. "Male or female?"
Natsuko rolled her eyes at his narrow-mindedness. "Definitely male. Hard not to notice after he de-transformed nude…"
Sensei only raised an eyebrow at that comment as he moved on to the next of the papers, setting the sketches aside in plain view. He scanned the new sheets. "So detailed. I appreciate your reporting on the event, Natsuko."
The woman shrugged, leaning on the edge of the desk. A self-satisfied smirk crossed her pretty face. "I try."
The doctor frowned suddenly before rereading a passage. "Humans?"
Natsuko nodded slowly. "Yeah…we have two of them now…"
"And he saved them? That isn't consistent with the scrolls…"
The woman shrugged again. "I don't have much t' tell ya on that point, Sensei. I didn' read 'em. But from what I've seen of him with my own eyes…he's very inconsistent."
The doctor took a minute to glance up from pulling out a new set of files when she said that. "Oh? How so?"
Natsuko shook her head slowly. "For one thing, compared to those humans, he treats us, supposed youkai descendants, like shit. You know that 'I-am-so-high-and-mighty-and-have-a-royal-stick-up-my-ass' kinda person. At least from the little bit of exposure I've had with him," the woman involuntarily shivered. "It's so fuckin' creepy to be near him…There's always this coldness in the air that gives me chills…
Sensei let the notes in his hand flutter to the desktop like dead leaves as he focussed his full attention on her. "What do you mean by that?"
"Well," Natsuko started hesitantly, looking down at the papers he had dropped. "Yayoi knows what it is. She took us near the youkai to feel 'it'. Me and Ryoichi, that is. You remember him, right?" At the doctor's absent nod the woman continued. "Well, as we got closer the 'feeling' came. It was like ice was being rubbed all over my skin. Or maybe even cold fingers were grasping at me…'cause after a while I could feel it pushing at me. Almost as if it wanted me to go away…"
"But what is 'it'?"
"Ryoichi tried to explain it. He said it was a sort of demonic energy. He called it youki, and—"
Sensei jumped to his feet with his hands pressed flat on his desk, smothering the notes Natsuko had painstakingly taken. He leaned towards her, eyes shining. "Really? The scrolls mentioned that exact word. Only once, nearer to the end." His face became thoughtful. "So that's what it warned us of…and you've felt it?" His eyes pinned on her again.
Natsuko took a hasty step back at his closeness, an uneasy expression on her face. "Yeah…but it wasn't a happy moment. It fuckin' creeps me out. And, wait a minute…" she scowled at him even as her hands shook nervously. "Those damned scrolls warned you of this youki thing?"
The doctor waved off her worry with a flick of the wrist. "Nothing you have to be worried about. Just that it's there and if not under control, it can be somewhat…overwhelming. But we aren't exactly dealing with a feral youkai here, now are we?" He shot her a sly glance as he turned once more towards the papers, picking them up and shoving them back into their envelope.
"So, you're saying that since we're dealing with a big shot here, we don't have to worry?" Natsuko asked, her tone edging on doubtful.
"Exactly."
"But then why did Yayoi and Ryoichi start acting so weird…?"
Sensei shrugged, turning his back to Natsuko to put the file into the cabinet behind him. "Nothing, really. Just their reactions to being closer to pure blood. That's all. Same reason you get cold when you're near the source. Remember that I told you it might be a bit strange at first. "
Natsuko stared at his slightly hunched back, trying to read into his tone. Something seemed missing in that explanation…his tone was a bit too bland…
But before she could figure it out Sensei turned around and motioned towards the door beside the one he had entered from. "Come, let's do one more blood-test and see how you're doing.
Natsuko sighed, before circling the desk to follow him. "I don't see why you bother. It isn't changing me or anything."
The doctor only shrugged lightly before allowing her to pass into the room first before following and closing the door behind them.
---
Done! 13 pages. And a month overdue… I am awful. _
Let's see if I can remember all of what I wanted to say here….
First, the *. That's so I can give you a little note about that line. I was watching Yami no Matsuei with Kits-chan a while ago and in the one "special" information "pop-up" episode (don't ask…) they mentioned the view those in the East have of white. I think I have it down correctly. (…-_- I probably messed something up….) White is more related to death, which is different than the Western view (i.e. angels, purity). So I think that color sort of fits Sess-sama. The death outfit with the bloody-flowers…. Hmmm… Morbid, ne?
I do not like parts of the Sess/Rin scenes. They seem soooo slow…then really fast… but I'm far too lazy to fix them. They get their points across, damn it. Good enough.
That, and Sess was being a big bloody bastard in this one… and I had to inch my way through the Rinako-past-scenes. Blah. _
But, hey, I have a plot going now! Whoo hoo!!!
Muse: ::lazily waves a sign that says ['ay…] on it…..::
-_-… My muse is against me… Figures…