7/27 Tuesday
After Sunday night's impromptu sleepover, which was tons of fun, that's for sure, but I slept halfway through Monday. We all did. We didn't wake up until after one in the afternoon when Carol called wondering where everyone was.
It was so much fun, though. Except for the one thing when I declared that I would dye my hair black for twenty dollars.
"I'll take you up on that," Stacey said. "I'll even buy the hair dye."
My eyes widened. "What?"
She thrust a twenty dollar bill into my hand. "Let's go get some hair dye."
It was eleven-thirty at night, so Stacey, Kristy, and I snuck out. Dawn, Mary Anne, and Claudia stayed back to cover for us if Dad woke up. Dawn was very disapproving of this, but after the laughing later, I don't think she could have minded THAT much.
We walked, in the black, with flashlights, to this store that's open 24 hours, and Stacey picked out a box of hair dye.
"That's permanent," I said.
"I know," she replied.
"I don't even get wash out dye?" I asked.
She grinned. "Look, if you're doing this, you're doing it all the way."
"Stacey, you're horrible," Kristy said. She was grinning.
"I just like to get my money's worth," Stacey said.
I sighed. "Okay, fine, get it."
"You know," Stacey said as she paid for the dye, "I dyed my hair once. Red. Ugh, it was awful. Oh, remember when Mallory dyed her hair blonde? How weird was that?"
"It wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for the gallons of make-up she wore," Kristy said. "She looked so fake."
We snuck (sneaked?) back into the house without getting caught.
"That is black!" Mary Anne said, examining the box.
"That is just going to soak up your blonde hair," Dawn said.
"Just think about your twenty bucks," Kristy said.
"There's nothing wrong with black hair," Claudia said.
Stacey took me by the wrist. "Come on, Sunny, you know what they say. When you go black, you never go back."
"That's not what that saying means!" I exclaimed. I paused. "But it's true."
"SUNNY!" Dawn exclaimed. "How do you know that?"
I smiled, just to tortue Dawn. "No reason."
Stacey followed all the directions on the box, and half an hour later, I pulled the towel off my hair. "Okay, how horrible is it?"
Mary Anne studied me. "Actually, it looks nice."
Dawn nodded. "Really, Sunny, it does."
I looked in the mirror. They were right. It was different. Very different. But it wasn't bad. In fact, it was kind of cool.
And I made twenty bucks.
Today was pretty easy on me. Dawn, Ducky, Stacey, and I went to the mall and hung out. I don't think any of us bought anything except for lunch. We just loitered.
When Ducky saw me, he about died.
"Oh my god, Sunny, look at you!"
My hair was all nice and shiny, and very pretty. I had to borrow makeup from Claudia, though, because all of my eyeliners and eyeshadows all looked weird. I'll have to get new makeup soon.
"You like?" I asked, grinning.
"It's so dark! Why? When?"
"Sunday night, on a twenty dollar bet."
He smiled. "That sounds like a legit reason. What does your dad think?"
"Dad? Oh, he hasn't noticed yet. We've been in the same room a dozen times and he hasn't said a thing."
Ducky drove us to the mall and we wandered the stores. We started at one end and decided to make a circle to the food court. By then we'd all be hungry.
"So," I said innocently to Ducky, "how did things go with you and Justin? You've been all quiet."
He shook his head. "Fine." He picked up a hat and put it on his head sideways. "Do I look cool?"
"Not really," Stacey said, putting the hat on straight. "Much better."
"Come on," I pressed, "there have to be some juicy details."
"Not really," he said. He started playing with the hat on his head. I know Ducky too well. I knew that he was avoiding telling me something. I was determined to find out what it was.
"Duuuuuuucky, you know you'll tell me sometime, so why not just tell us now? Why draw it out?"
"It's more fun that way?" He put a pair of sunglasses. "Look, now I can be a spy."
"A spy who's going to tell me what happened!"
"Sunny, leave it," Dawn said. "If he doesn't want to tell you, it's his business."
"All secrets are meant to be told," I said. I didn't really mean this, since I wasn't going to tell all of my secrets. I wasn't going to tell Kristy's secrets (especially to Ducky. He doesn't know that Kristy has a crush on Justin). But Ducky's my best friend. What am I going to do but try and weasel it out of him? If he was stalling this much, it had to be something good.
"Not really," Dawn said.
"Psh," Stacey said. "I'll be honest. I want to know just as much as Sunny does."
It's so nice to have someone on my side. I'm going to miss them all soooooo much when they're gone. I can't believe they're leaving so soon.
"All right," Ducky said. He sighed, but he was smiling, so I knew he wasn't going to hate me forever for it. Not that he ever does. Which is something I love about him.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Justin kind of... he sort of spent the night."
I stared at him. "Did you have sex?"
"No! Well, yeah, but..."
"YOU HAD SEX!" I screamed.
"Sunny, will you keep your voice down?" Dawn snapped.
"I didn't have sex," Ducky said. "Let's just say... um, I'm past first base."
I rolled my eyes. "We're all mature young adults here. We can take the big words. Tell me, er, us exactly what happened."
"You're not getting all the details," he warned, his face turning red. "But, um, I dunno, we just kind of..."
"Oral," Stacey said knowingly.
He nodded.
"Isn't that a little fast?" Dawn asked, looking concerned.
Ducky shrugged. "We kind of thought so too, but... it just sort of happened. We didn't plan on it or anything."
I was going to make a snarky comment, but Stacey jumped in before I could say anything.
"You guys used protection, right?"
Ducky nodded. "Justin had them."
She nodded approvingly. "You should start keeping them around too."
"I will," he said. "Oh, and I came out to Ted. But I didn't have a lot of choice when he found Justin and I making out on the living room floor."
My jaw hit the floor. Ducky doesn't usually blurt out stuff like that. You have to edge around him trying to talk about you for a while, but in the end he'll say it. But not without some pressure. And then the fact that he and Justin were making out on the floor.
"How did Ted take that?" Dawn asked.
"Oddly enough, he took it really well. I don't know what to think of that. He's not really meeting my eyes anymore, though. I don't know what's going on with him."
"He found his brother making out with a guy on the floor in his living room," Stacey said. "You're lucky he's taking it as well as he is."
Ducky looked sheepish, but he smiled at me. "You happy now?"
"You're all a man now," I said, poking his shoulder.
"I don't know about that. It's kind of confusing, actually. But it's not so bad."
We finally got back around to the food court and we sat down at Starburst's (Do we eat anywhere else? Oh well, they have everything).
"Have you talked to Amalia?" Stacey asked, digging into her salad.
Dawn shook her head. "Not since we went to Hollywood. Apparently Brendan's dad is-" She stopped talking and looked straight at me, her face pale.
I waved my fork at her. "What? Amalia told me what was going on. It sucks, but I don't know Brendan's dad. I'm not having a breakdown over it, I swear. From what she told me, they caught his cancer pretty early, so he's got great odds. Mom never had great odds, even when we wanted to believe she did."
Everyone was really quiet.
"What do you want me to say?" I asked. I stood up on the booth and shouted, for the entire restaurant. "MY MOM IS DEAD! NO ONE THINKS THAT I CAN HANDLE IT, BUT GUESS WHAT? I AM!"
"Sunny, sit down," Ducky said in this calm, soothing voice.
I did. "Look, Dawn, I'm alive. I'm not going to let Mom dying kill me too. And I'm not going to let it keep me from being a friend to Amalia. She told me about it the same time she asked if she could have a job at the bookstore. Which is why she's working there now."
"She likes it a lot better," Ducky said.
I nodded. "So, what did Amalia tell you?"
Dawn frowned at me for a moment. "Apparently he's not doing so hot. But she told me that Brendan's mom insisted that they go out with us. That they needed a break. Amalia said she hasn't even been sleeping at her own house."
"Brendan's house is closer to the bookstore anyway," I said. "Dad's being really great about letting her have flexible hours so she can be at the hospital. She's pretty much work, sleep, hospital girl. I couldn't imagine being that loyal to someone who wasn't my own family member."
Dawn opened her mouth, but then closed it again.
"You would," Stacey said, "if it was someone you loved. Even if it was THEIR family. You'd want to be there. I know that from the friends of friends who would visit me in the hospital."
We left the mall and Ducky dropped us off.
"Hey, Dawn?" I said, before they started into the house.
She turned and waved for Stacey to go back into the house. "Yeah, Sunny?"
"I just wanted to tell you that you should have just asked me outright if Amalia had talked to me. I get why you didn't, but it's kind of like you couldn't trust me to handle the truth. Amalia's my friend too. I care about what's happening in her life, even if she's going to things similar to what I went through. Especially then."
Dawn looked a little ashamed, but what she said next was really truthful, and even I could see that. "Honestly, Sunny, I didn't want to mention it and be the one to tell you. And for another thing, I'm not used to this side of you. I should be, because you used to be this way, what seems like such a long time ago."
"What?"
"A good friend. Responsible. And even adult. That phase of you, that rebel thing, I could hardly stand you. But I did what I could to still be your friend. And now, I'm still expecting that Sunny to come out, but it's not. I'm sorry for underestimating you."
"It's okay," I replied. "And you have good reason. It's only now that I'm getting it. I'm getting how I was, and how I am now. Though, even with all that rebelling, I never had black hair."
Dawn laughed. "It really does looks good."
I grinned. "Of course it does, it's on me!"
She laughed and we hugged. I went into my house and Dad took a long look at me.
"Sunny, what did you do to your hair?"
I laughed and gave him a hug.