A/N: Gah! I've been neglecting my responsibilities as a writer, I haven't
updated in sooo long! I don't have a pc anymore, so I have to use my
friend's whenever I come over...which is at least once every week so,
expect updates more often! And now for more parodistic goodness! Oh, and
fragonknight01, I think I'll use that idea, thank you!
Harry walked down the corridors of Hogwarts, with a sick feeling in his stomach...like something bad was about to happen...something involving a food...like spotted dick (get your minds out of the gutter! It is a food!) But suddenly, Harry felt a cold chill go up his spine. He spun around quickly to find his arch nemesis the dark lord Vo- Professor Vol D. Mort.
"Hello, Harry, what's wrong, your friends don't believe that I'm the dark professor- Lord Voldemort?!" The evil professor taunted.
"They'll believe me soon enough, and with Dumbledore here, you can't do anything!" Harry retorted.
"Hahahahahahahaha! We'll see about that!"
"What do you mean?" Harry asked.
"I mean...we'll see about if Dumbledore can do anything."
".....oh...."
"Get to your common room before I give you a detention!" Vol D. Mort shouted
"...whatever."
Professor Vol D. Mort quickly stumbled into Dumbledore's office, unnoticed. He gazed around the room, either because he was overwhelmed by the powerful magical items the room contained...or because he though it just looked pretty.
He cackled madly as he took a packet of PCP from his pocket.
"This ought to make things...interesting" Vol D. Mort laughed as he poured the drug into a goblet of liquid on Dumbledore's desk.
Then, the evil professor quickly fled from the room, leaving a lethal potion for the poor headmaster....
Professor Snape walked along the corridors of Hogwarts, a grimace on his face. Another year of teaching potions, not Defense against the dark arts...he wanted that job so badly, he'd grimace while he thought about it, like he's doing now.
All of a sudden, Snape was shocked to see one of his favorite students, Draco Malfoy, as a pile of ashes on the ground.
"...Potter..." Snape mumbled, as he pulled out his wand, and begun to recite an ancient cantation:
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, add water to Malfoy, so he won't combust. And give him back his body mass, so that he may kick Potter's ass.
A brilliant flash of light flooded the hallway for a moment, as Malfoy regenerated, with an evil look on his face.
"Thank you sir...I shall surely kick Pottah's ass." Malfoy smiled.
"Glad to hear that, I'll have my eye on you."
"Ok."
"And, Malfoy..." Snape added
"Yes, sir?"
"Put on some clothes."
"Yes, sir."
A/N: Sorry for the short update, this was kinda a spur of the moment update...next time I'll write it all out before typing it, and I'll have more time to write! Seeya!
Harry walked down the corridors of Hogwarts, with a sick feeling in his stomach...like something bad was about to happen...something involving a food...like spotted dick (get your minds out of the gutter! It is a food!) But suddenly, Harry felt a cold chill go up his spine. He spun around quickly to find his arch nemesis the dark lord Vo- Professor Vol D. Mort.
"Hello, Harry, what's wrong, your friends don't believe that I'm the dark professor- Lord Voldemort?!" The evil professor taunted.
"They'll believe me soon enough, and with Dumbledore here, you can't do anything!" Harry retorted.
"Hahahahahahahaha! We'll see about that!"
"What do you mean?" Harry asked.
"I mean...we'll see about if Dumbledore can do anything."
".....oh...."
"Get to your common room before I give you a detention!" Vol D. Mort shouted
"...whatever."
Professor Vol D. Mort quickly stumbled into Dumbledore's office, unnoticed. He gazed around the room, either because he was overwhelmed by the powerful magical items the room contained...or because he though it just looked pretty.
He cackled madly as he took a packet of PCP from his pocket.
"This ought to make things...interesting" Vol D. Mort laughed as he poured the drug into a goblet of liquid on Dumbledore's desk.
Then, the evil professor quickly fled from the room, leaving a lethal potion for the poor headmaster....
Professor Snape walked along the corridors of Hogwarts, a grimace on his face. Another year of teaching potions, not Defense against the dark arts...he wanted that job so badly, he'd grimace while he thought about it, like he's doing now.
All of a sudden, Snape was shocked to see one of his favorite students, Draco Malfoy, as a pile of ashes on the ground.
"...Potter..." Snape mumbled, as he pulled out his wand, and begun to recite an ancient cantation:
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, add water to Malfoy, so he won't combust. And give him back his body mass, so that he may kick Potter's ass.
A brilliant flash of light flooded the hallway for a moment, as Malfoy regenerated, with an evil look on his face.
"Thank you sir...I shall surely kick Pottah's ass." Malfoy smiled.
"Glad to hear that, I'll have my eye on you."
"Ok."
"And, Malfoy..." Snape added
"Yes, sir?"
"Put on some clothes."
"Yes, sir."
A/N: Sorry for the short update, this was kinda a spur of the moment update...next time I'll write it all out before typing it, and I'll have more time to write! Seeya!