A/n: Hey people this is the part that got lost when my computer went dumb and didn't save. I was looking through my diary and saw all the things that bothered me. I can't believe that he hurt my feelings so badly. So here you guys go, read and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own RK.

This is it they are gonna start calling our names out. They just finished giving speeches and we were told to stand up and get ready to walk up and get our certificates. "Thank god! I'm baking in the sun I never should have worn black."

"Yeah I know Kaoru, how could it be so hot today when it was so cloudy yesterday?"

"Hurry and call names I need to get out of the sun!"

The teachers started calling out their student's names. And then I heard it, "Kenshin, Himura" He walked up and got his certificate. I guess Misao saw my face.

"Awww Kao, don't worry bout the loser. He barely deserves the thing."

"What did you say?"

"I said he barely deserves the thing."

"ha, ha I thought you said he barely has a thing. You know a winkiedink."

"Oh my god Kaoru what are you thinking? Probably doesn't."

"Hey I just misheard you, you're the one that made it worst. Besides if Soujiro hears us he will kill us for talking about something like that." Soujiro was right behind her.

"Something like what?" the voice behind her said.

Misao took the opportunity to brief him, "She was talking about Kenshin's thingy." Kaoru sent her death glares the moment Misao finished her sentence.

Soujiro hit the back of Kaoru's head with the program. "Don't do it again." Then he walked away.

Kaoru was relived when she got home and the ceremony was over. She felt like reading her diary. They were filled with a few things about her love for Kenshin. Reading it made her stomach sick and she couldn't understand why she felt that way. Some things were crossed out in an attempt to forget them. The pages said:

June 8, 2004

I don't know who to write to anymore. I feel so lost without him. Though it has been 2 months it feels like just yesterday I could see him look at me in the way that makes me smile deep down inside. Everything reminds me about him. Songs the way my surrounding looks, just anything. I realized I'm just back where I started, love sick for someone who doesn't care. Can't I just let go? My aunt was right I am walking on eggshells for him. Why can't he see it? I will just say it I think I…love him. No wonder he thinks I'm stupid. I hate my self for doing this. Torturing myself is stupid. His sister even thinks I'm stupid for liking him. So lonely It makes me want to just cry. He was my everything but I'm ugly and annoying. It doesn't help that people have labeled me as Kenshin's girlfriend. I talk to some people and they say, "Hi Kenshin's girlfriend" I do have a name. I'm so lost. I'm saying sometimes I want to hop on a plane leave, just go on with my life. And yet I can't let go of him. I have such a hard time doing so. I keep remembering all of our close moments. This is just killing me. I've lost my appetite. I know starving myself won't make it better but if food is supposed to keep me alive then I just don't see a point. This is so stupid. I remember the time I warned him that someone was gonna try to get in between us and use him to make my life horrible. I told him the exact quote. He just looked at me in his sweet way and told me not to worry. I guess he could see that I was scared out of my mind. He said I would never believe her over me. Then he hugged me. As he walked a way he looked over his shoulder and smiled sweetly. I know that if I reminded him he would deny it. I miss him so much.

A/N: There you have it straight off my diary to computers all over the world. Leave a review.