Author's Note: Wow…s'been a while since one of these. For those who've made it this far, congratulations! I'm fantastically happy that you've stuck to this particular fanfic for this long, bravo! On a sadder note, my time spent writing this fanfic has caused me to neglect other things, such as getting a job and earning a living. Now, being somewhat impoverished (I'm exaggerating greatly), I've decided to seek employment once again. This might be the last chapter for a little bit, as updates will probably become less frequent. Stay tuned and be patient. I'm determined to finish this story with as much class as I can. Thanks once again, dear reader.
Kiel
12: So Long Tomoe
"This gum," Wonka-san went on, "is my latest, my greatest, my most fascinating invention! It's a chewing gum meal! This tiny strip of chewing gum here is a whole three-course dinner all by itself!"
"That's impossible! It's total nonsense!" Masaru's father said.
"My dear sir!" cried Wonka-san, "When I start selling this gum in shops it will change everything! I came up with the idea when I thought of all the children (and adults alike) who are shinobi and go off on long, arduous missions with hardly anything to eat! It made me sad to think of all the young ninjas out there, having to eat those beastly rations that they're supplied with! It simply wouldn't do! So I came up with this gum! This particular strip of gum happens to be steamy rice, barbequed pork, and blueberry pie!"
"What do you mean, it's steamy rice, barbequed pork, and blueberry pie?" asked Tomoe Bulnose.
"If you were to start chewing it," said Wonka-san, "then that's exactly what you would get! It's absolutely amazing! You can feel the food going down your throat and into your stomach! You can taste it perfectly It fills you up, it satisfies you! Isn't it fantastic?"
"It's utterly impossible!" Souya Ikari said.
At that moment Tomoe Bulnose took the record gum she'd been chewing out of her mouth and stuck it behind her ear. Then, quickly, she reached out her little hand and grabbed the stick of gum!
"Ah! Little girl!" Wonka-san said as he noticed. "I'd rather you not take it. You see, I haven't got it quite right yet. There are still a couple things…"
"I'm a record breaking gum chewer," she said defiantly, "and I'm not afraid of anything!" and before Wonka-san could stop her she popped the gum into her mouth. At once, her well-trained jaws started chewing away on it. Wonka-san gave a bit of a grimace and began to shy away from her.
"How is it, Tomoe-chan?" Bulnose-san asked her daughter.
"It's amazing! Hot, steamy rice with sauce! I can feel it going down my throat!" she shouted.
"Yeah, isn't that great, spit it out!" Wonka-san said.
"It's changing!" Tomoe shouted again. "The second course is coming up! It's barbequed pork! It's tender and juicy! Oh boy, what a flavour!"
"Tomoe-chan, that's wonderful!" the girl's mother said happily. "Imagine, my daughter is the world's first to have a chewing gum meal!"
Everyone stood there watching Tomoe Bulnose as she chewed the extraordinary gum. Hinata Hyuuga was staring at her absolutely spellbound, watching her huge rubbery lips as they pressed and unpressed with the chewing, and Naruto stood beside her, gaping at the girl. Wonka-san was looking quite worried, saying "Yeah, it's great, all up until…"
"Blueberry pie and cream!" shouted Tomoe.
"…that." Wonka-san finished with a bit of a sigh.
"Here it comes! Oh, it's perfect! It's beautiful! It's…exactly as though I'm swallowing it! It's as though I'm chewing and swallowing great big spoonfuls of the most marvelous blueberry pie in the world!"
"What's wrong with her face!" Masaru said loudly, pointing at Tomoe.
"Y-your face is turning blue!" shrieked her mother, "Your face is as blue as a blueberry!"
"What do you mean?" asked Tomoe, still chewing away.
"I tried to tell you…" Wonka-san said quietly, retreating behind everyone else.
Everybody was staring at Tomoe. She looked up at her hands, which were turning blue. The shade of purplish blue was spreading all over her body like some kind of abhorrent rash. "M-mother…" Tomoe said frightened, staring at her body, "W-what's happening to me!" Her entire body had turned a brilliant, purplish blue; the colour of blueberry juice.
"Tomoe!" screamed her mother, "You're swelling up!"
"Dear God," Hito Kawasaki said aghast, "she's blowing up like a balloon!"
"Somebody save her!" shrieked Tomoe's mother.
But there was no saving her now. Her body was swelling up and changing shape at such a rate that within a minute it had turned into an enormous round ball (a gigantic blueberry, in fact) and all that remained of Tomoe Bulnose herself was a tiny pair of legs and a tiny pair of arms sticking out of the great round orb and a little head on top. Tomoe's body had almost completely absorbed all of her! Tomoe's mother walked backwards slowly in terror. As she did, Wonka-san had sneaked up right behind her.
"I've tried it on like thirty Oompa-Loompas and all of them came out as blueberries! It's like the darndest thing!" he said, scaring Tomoe's mother out of her wits.
"But I can't have a blueberry for a daughter!" the girl's mother screamed, "Put her back to normal this instant!"
Wonka-san made the same odd call with his tongue as he did before, and ten Oompa-Loompas appeared immediately at his side. "Roll Tomoe-san into the boat and take her along to the juicing room immediately" he said to them.
"The Juicing Room!" cried Bulnose-san. "What are they going to do to her there!"
"Well…they're gonna squeeze her," Wonka-san said with a smile, "like a little pimple! We've got to get all that juice out of her right away, or else she might explode!" he finished with a tiny laugh.
Already the ten Oompa-Loompas were rolling the enormous blueberry body of Tomoe across the floor of the Inventing room toward the door that led to the chocolate river where the boat was waiting. Tomoe's mother raced after them, helping them to squeeze Tomoe's massive flesh through the frame of the steel door. The rest of the party, including Hinata and Naruto, stood absolutely still and watched them go.
"Huh…" Wonka-san said, looking around as if he was a bit befuddled, "I thought for sure that the Oompa-Loompas would try to do something mischievous, or…sing a song or something…Oop! I spoke too soon," he smiled again, "here comes a few of them now!"
A few more Oompa-Loompas appeared in a cloud of smoke to try and help the others squeeze Tomoe through the doorway, as she was quite stuck and growing bigger by the minute. As they rolled and pushed, some of them began to hum. Soon, the room was filled with rhythm; all of the Oompa-Loompa's singing together could be heard loud and clear:
"Dear friends, we surely all agreeThere's almost nothing worse to see
Than some little repulsive bum
Who's always chewing chewing gum.
So please believe us when we say
That chewing gum will never pay;
The sticky habit's bound to send
Miss Tomoe to a sticky end.
So that's why we'll do all we can
To save our little Tomoe-chan
From suffering a grisly fate.
She's still quite young. It's not too late,
Provided she survives the cure.
We hope she does. We can't be sure."
With the final verse the Oompa-Loompas gave a great push and popped Tomoe Bulnose out of the door and into the ship. Her distraught mother followed the Oompa-Loompas as they exited.
"Okay…well," Wonka-san said thoughtfully as he looked upon the rest of the children, "well, well, well, two naughty little kids gone. Three good little kids left! Fantastic!" he smiled, clapping his hands together. "Come on, let's keep moving! There's so much time and so little to do!" he began to walk off.
Naruto looked down to see that Hinata's hands were shaking. She simply stood, rooted to the ground, transfixed.
"Oi, Hinata-chan, Wonka-san is going! We should try to keep up," he said, taking her hand.
"Eh? Oh, r-right!" she said as she started to move. The followed the group hand in hand.
Hinata looked forward to see her own hand held tight by Naruto's, feeling his soft, warm palm against hers. I-Is this the first time we've held hands? Hinata thought to herself.
She smiled. She was pretty sure it was.