EVERYONE check out my other penname it's a joint account w/ my friend the penname is CHIBI-4.0 we're writing a Harry Potter fanfic but we cant post anything until 7:30pm on the west coast on the 24 who the hell uses the time on the west coast? For those of you that like me live on the east coast its actually 10:30pm (it took me awhile to figure that out cuz I couldn't remember time zones)
KCCREATION thanx and meh everyone gats a lil emotional at times
JAWX THORN read and see .
I vaguely hear the door to my room open but I'm to tired to lift my head and I really don't care what happens anymore either way. I wish I had though as a large hand wraps around my arm with bruising strength and hauls me out of bed once more.
"Why the hell didn ya go ta school taday?" my father slurs in my face, his breath reeking of beer.
"Didn't feel like it," I shrug hoping that he doesn't see though my act.
He growls enraged at my defiance, and flings me across the room. I stumble into the opposite wall and slide down, immediately getting back to my feet refusing to give him the satisfaction of seeing me hurt. He reaches above my bed and grabs my lava lamp, which I had left on earlier, and throws it at me. I manage to doge however the lamp shatters as it hits the wall and melted wax, burning liquid, and heated glass rain down on me cutting and burning my back and arms. I choke on my attempt to keep from crying out as I scrabble away from the debris. My father grabs my arm-twisting it back and throws me onto my bed. I grind my teeth together trying to keep back my tears. My father straddles me, his hand firmly in place forcing my face into my pillow where I allow my tears to fall knowing they will not be seen.
My father's free hand fumbles with the button on my jeans. Realizing what is going to happen I jerk sideways and try to free myself from his grasp my tears now falling in earnest. His hand releases my head only to collide with it once more stunning me. Lying limp under my father my thoughts race as I try to block out the feeling of my pants being pulled down.
My father's rough hand roams over my body as I let myself sob bitterly into my pillow. He thrusts into me with out warning and I feel myself tear from the force. He hammers into me until he is satisfied. He then pulls out and leaves the room with out saying another word to me.
I lay on my bed gaining control of my tears. Once I calmed down enough to think I began to push myself up with my arms, however they shake violently under me. Unable to hold up my weight I collapse back into my pillow, and pass out.
When I wake once more its well into the afternoon. I struggle to my feet, and manage to take a couple of steps before falling to my knees. I crawl over to my desk and pull out my bottom draw, wincing as I feel the burned flesh on my back stretch, I dig around until I find my knife pulling it out I stare at my wrist thinking of how easy it would be to end it all if I just make that one cut. I can end my father's abuse, I can end being made fun of for being stupid, I can end Momiji's constant worry about me. Most important of all I can be with my mother again.
Shaking I bring the knife closer however at the last second I freak and pull the knife back before it even touches my skin. 'There are other places where I can cut the vein it doesn't have to be my wrist just as long as it's a vein. There's a vein on the inside of your thigh a big one the biggest one in my entire body if I cut that one then I'll defiantly die.'
I bring the knife towards my thigh my catch sight of the blood there and gag instantly nauseas. I reach behind me for the garbage can and bring up what little I had eaten in the past few days. I continue to retch until it's nothing but dry heaves that rack my frame. I push the garbage can away from myself unable to stand the stench.
'Another vein I need another vein that all one that isn't in my wrist, or evidence of…of…of last night. My palm in some movie a girl died because she cut the vein in her palm that's the one I'll use it'll be easy.'
Looking down I dig the knife into my palm and drag it across smiling at the feel of my flesh separating. I continue to look down at my palm as my vision swims before passing out.
I'm sorry it so short but its and update at least and its all J. K. Rowling's fault and my parents it was my birthday then we went camping then Harry potter came out and I couldn't do anything else then me and my friend started working on it and and and I'M SORRY! bursts into tears