Chapter 9 Softly Over
I startled awake, sitting up completely alert, to Draco standing next to the bed. His head was bowed, looking at me from under his golden lashes. "Are you okay?" glancing down to the discarded bedclothes still strewn on the floor. He cautiously picked up the sheets and wrapping them around my shoulders.
He sat next to me, as if he were afraid to really come near me. I leaned over on him as he tentatively wrapped his arms around me, holding me and kissing the top of my head. "I'm so sorry, Mercy, I could hear you scream. I swear I tried every spell I knew on the door, but it was to heavily warded."
"What could you have done, Draco?"
"Anything but wait until he left and even then your door was still warded."
I shook my head and sighed
"Come let's clean you up and get the hell out of here." He headed toward the bathroom.
"Draco, I'll be alright, go and pack up, after I shower then we'll go."
"Are you sure?" he didn't look convinced.
"Yes."
He turned and left and I went to the bathroom, after a look in the mirror, I gasped, blood streaked my cheeks, no wonder Draco looked at me that way. I turned the ornate handles to start the flow of water and stepped under the steaming spray.
I had to wash away all evidence of Lucius. I would not ask why or any other silly questions like that, I knew why. Lucius and I are not much different in that respect. When we want something we take it, no matter who is willing or not.
We are both predators, only I have resisted most of my predatory impulses for the last two years. And where did resisting get me? Weakened. I had taken for granted my immortal strength. But that was about to change. Wizard blood was so much stronger than Muggle blood, obviously, so I could regain my strength in a short amount of time if I had a few magical donors.
After washing myself and my hair, I stepped out of the shower. I worked on a plan for revenge as I dried off and dressed in a black dress with billowing sleeves.
I decided to tell Draco as soon as we returned to school. I checked my appearance in the full length mirror; my dress like all I brought with me was floor length and had a bit of a train. I was reminded of my mother; she had many gowns like this. Silver satin lined the sleeves and bottom hem. As I brushed my hair, I noticed the faint silver line on my left cheekbone, the only evidence of the previous night with Lucius.
I left my hair down, and packed everything I brought, and then transfigured the bag to fit in my pocket. I pulled the black wool cloak around my shoulders and left the room.
I could feel Lucius near when I entered the hall. Thoughts briefly crossed my mind of taking him then, but quickly were dispersed by the pride to not take a weakened man, I am better than that, another time, another place, we would meet again.
I descended the staircase and entered the foyer, Narcissa entered from the right, standing in front of me with tears in her eyes she lifted her delicate fingertips to caress the scar on my cheek and pulled her hand away to trace a similar scar on her own.
She smiled sadly and embraced me in a warm maternal hug. "It will be over soon, I promise." I spoke softly for her ears only. I gave myself over the her embrace, tears flooded my eyes as I remembered my own mother's last embrace before she told me to leave and save myself, just a short time ago.
Narcissa pulled away holding me at arms length, I bowed my head and wiped my tears quickly on the sleeve of my gown, when I looked back up into her pale blue eyes, she released me and greeted her son, who was now descending the stairs.
Narcissa approached and embraced her only child, which he firmly returned. I heard him ask, "Where is Lucius?"
"Oh, he is still in bed. I believe he has come down with something." She smiled toward me, approvingly.
Draco released her and stood next to me placing a protective hand on the small of my back. "I'm glad to have met you Mercedes." She said.
"Thank you, again for inviting me into your home."
"Take care of each other." She handed Draco a silver chalice, "Have a safe journey."
I nodded and reached for the goblet, Draco's fingers interlaced with mine around it, and he held my free hand, I felt the tug behind my stomach.
When I felt the ground under my feet once more, I opened my eyes to see the gates of Hogwarts. I looked up into Draco's stormy gray eyes, and released my hand from his, pulling up the hood of my cloak. We walked side by side along the path towards the double doors.
When we stepped into the school, students were here and there, from various houses socializing. It seemed noticeably more silent when we entered and the noise picked back up as we made our way down through the dungeons.
We entered his room and sat by the fireplace which was lit when we walked in. The large armchairs were comfortable, and we both stayed silent waiting.
"Can you feel something different about me?"
:"Yes, I've noticed some things."
"Once I tell you, my life is in your hands. I trust you enough to tell you."
"I understand."
"Everything I've told you so far has been the truth; only certain things were left out." I stated finally turning to face him to better gauge his reaction.
"Go on," he prompted.
I slid off the chair to kneel between his long legs, and lifted his hands holding them in my own, looking up into his angelic face, praying for some sort of salvation.
"Draco, I'm a vampire."
Waiting a few seconds watching the information to process He looked at me intently then smiled. "Come on, I thought you were serious."
I lifted his hands to my face, "Draco, look at me, whatever term you use, that's what I am. Now that I've told you, the charm is broken, and you will feel it more now.
"Mercy, stop it." He tried to pull his hands away but my strength held him still looking into his eyes.
He averted his gaze past me and into the fire. "Get out."
"No. Look at me."
His cold eyes shifted to mine, "Get away from me."
"I'm not leaving until I'm ready." I knew telling him was a risk and alienating his space was another but I would stay until he had his say. It would do neither of us good if he just stewed in his own feelings of betrayal. "Draco, I know you're angry right now. I know you feel I've betrayed you for not telling you, but you also must realize I have told you and also the reasons that I've waited to tell you. You know that I care a great deal for you and even telling you, at any time put me in danger."
He looked into my eyes and nodded "If telling me was so dangerous, why do it then?"
"Because you would find out eventually and I wanted it to be from me."
"I see, that way no one else could tell me and use that disloyalty against you."
"Yes."
"Does anyone else know?"
"Dumbledore does, of course, and Snape just found out."
"How do you, you know, eat?" His curiosity overriding his apprehension.
"I drink a potion that allows me to eat like humans and decreases the need for blood."
"Decreases? But doesn't eliminate?"
"Yes'
Realization settled into his eyes, his hand caressed the spot I had bitten two nights ago, "You fed off me?!" he exclaimed. Fury replaced realizations as he stood to distance himself from me and paced.
"I can't believe you did that."
"Draco, it was an accident, I swear, I lost control, and I'm sorry."
"How many times have you done it?"
"Just the once."
"Do you change, physically I mean?"
"Sort of."
"Can I see?"
"Draco, it's not something I can just turn on and more importantly turn off. Unless you're offering? Or any strong aggressive emotion, anger, pain."
He looked anxious for a moment pacing, then he walked over to his bedside table, opening the drawer and withdrew a dagger. My own eyes widened for a moment unsure of his intentions he unsheathed it and walked toward me. I was careful not to flinch away from him he drew the dagger with his left hand wincing when he cut into his right mound of Venus, offering me his hand.
I closed my eyes for a moment, felling my eyes dilate and change the black overflowing the blue of my irises, and my teeth extend. Keeping my eyes closed, inhaling the scent of fresh blood.
"If that is not and offering, Draco, please wrap your hand." When I opened my eyes, he had moved closer to me, his hand just a fraction from my mouth. He startled for a moment looking into my eyes, but held still. I pulled his hand closer to my mouth and licking his self-inflicted wound, closing it. I released his hand and quickly stepped back before I lost complete control.
Draco looking back from his hand to me and back again. "Please, Draco, no more parlor tricks. "I breathed.
"Sorry."
"It's alright, you had to see for yourself, I understand, but no more, you are very hard to resist."
He smirked at that, I went to retrieve my bag, pulling my flask out, swallowing a swig, and recapped it. We both returned to our seats by the fire.
From across the room he asked, "Does this make you immortal?"
"Partly, anything, anyone can be killed if you know how, but given the best circumstances I will live for centuries."
"Does this also mean you can make me into one?"
"Theoretically, yes, but Draco, I'm not strong enough, I'm surviving off a potion, but blood is what makes me stronger."
"With blood you could be strong enough to change me?"
"We call it 'embrace' and even with power, Draco, I wouldn't."
"Why not?" His voice raised in indignation.
"Draco, this is a curse not a blessing you are also to young to make any eternal decision."
"But I'm old enough to feed from?"
"I would appreciate if we could be adults, Draco. Anyway, what has happened between us has no lasting effects."
"Well obviously, I'm not an adult, and neither are you, when were you "embraced'? A year ago? So how much better are you?"
"Draco, please stop," I sighed this was not going the way I had hoped. "I was embraced twenty years ago; can you imagine being on the brink of death for days, weeks, or even years? Can you imagine begging for the final release that only death will bring and because of what you are you will never know peace?"
He seemed to consider it for a few minutes, "In a few years, Draco, when you have had time to consider what I've said, and then yes I will embrace you. But I won't hold it against you if you change your mind."
"A few years?"
"Yes, after that and after the war, then those years will mean nothing as far as time. But experience is invaluable."
"I've read that vampires have certain powers, is that true?"
"Yes, but my powers are altered, because I'm not just a vampire and not just a witch, my powers are blended. I don't remember which ones are origin specific anymore, telecommunication is one gift."
"Have you ever been inside my mind?" he looked suspicious.
"No, I wouldn't."
"Why not, if you can, why wouldn't you?" his typical Slytherin morals evident.
"You already know how it feels like, being invaded. Mental mind rape and I only use that ability in extreme cases."
We both sat in silence for a while, contemplating, finally I rose "Draco, I'm really tired if you don't mind I'm going to bed."
"You can still sleep here; you don't have to go back."
"Thank you, Draco for everything, but I really need rest and I don't want to distract you." I smiled and leaned over to kiss him softly on his lips.
"Goodnight, Mercy." He said quietly.
I turned grabbed my bang and left. My last thoughts before sleep finally overcame was my life in Draco's hands and if he would turn me over to his father and other Death Eaters to my fate.
//////
We walked along the dungeon corridors the stone keeping the air cool around us. I followed Professor Snape into his classroom and beyond towards his office. Books lined the far wall and to my right sat his desk, clear of anything, exposing the rich mahogany wood.
I sat in a wooden chair in front of his desk as he closed and warded the door as well as the fireplace behind me. I sat fingering my ring around my left middle finger. I realized my habit of that long ago, but continued to do so as I felt it released nervous energy, and right now Snape's ominous presence made me slightly edgy, probably a side effect of the last time I was alone with a Death Eater in a heavily warded room.
Snape sat in his leather chair behind his desk, his piercing eyes studying and evaluating my present state of mind. I realized that this was the first time he has seen me like this. I stopped fiddling with my moonstone, seeing that it could be mistaken as a sign of vulnerability and looked up into his eyes, waiting for him to explain why he pulled me away from breakfast.
Not that I was hungry, of course, since the amount of blood I stole from Lucius was substantial I wouldn't feel the urge for blood for a while. Satisfaction on wizard blood was always difficult to judge, as their magical ability seemed to alter the strength and longevity of their blood. And since I drained Lucius as much as I thought I could go longer than I've had before, without the feeling of loss of control.
Yes, even in the cold dungeons with the fearsome Professor's eyes boring into mine, I was quite warm.
It seemed Snape and I were engaging in a battle of wills as to who would speak first. I really wasn't sure I could trust him, since he knew to much as it was.
"I gather you had an eventful stay at Malfoy Manor," he said in low silky dangerous tones.
"Yes," I confirmed.
"It seems Mr. Malfoy has suffered extreme blood loss. Care to enlighten me?"
"Whatever are you talking about?"
"Miss Xavier, do not waste my time," he warned.
"He deserved everything he gets and more." I wasn't really confirming any information and I was unnerved by Snape's involvement.
"I am positive he did, Miss Xavier, but Mr. Malfoy wants answers, as you are most likely aware of the kind of man he is, he will stop at nothing to get the information he seeks."
"How do you know about his apparent condition?"
"I was called to Mr. Malfoy's sickbed last evening and I administered the appropriate potion for his complete recovery."
I have to admit, he did warn me about going but does that mean he and Mr. Malfoy are not nearly as close as others would imagine? I could sense animosity between the two, surely, but I couldn't be certain.
"Oh, so Mr. Malfoy is well again?" I thought about leaving now and leaving them to their war, but I knew I would regret it.
"Yes, he is, but he believes you cursed him with some obscure curse, he has no reason to think otherwise."
"You did not tell him? Why? I mean how should I believe I can trust you with the valuable information about me?"
"No, I didn't and as far as the rest you will have to trust me."
"I'm sorry, sir, but in my lifetime trust is not something I have very much of."
"Then we are at an impasse, neither of us trust the other with any more information."
"It would seem so." I paused, finally breaking eye contact and looking over at his bookshelves. "How long do you believe I have before Lucius retaliates?"
"He already has," My eyes returned to his in surprise. "But for now it is not anything you should fear, in fact he seems quite impressed by your talents, as well. His angrier that he underestimated you so his is wise enough to not make the same mistake with you twice. He has related his information to higher sources, as it were, and your services will be requested shortly."
"My services?"
"Yes, there are those whom feel you would be an asset to the cause. You should expect an invitation, which is more of a demand, than a request. Failure and refusal are not options."
//////
I left Snape's office when the bell rang but I really didn't want to go the History of Magic. I roamed the halls for a bit.
I was to receive and invitation to join the Death Eaters, and by Snape's account it was rare a woman was ever made one, and it would require a test of sorts.
I did not come here to become one of them; my parent's did not die for me to become one of them.
I felt that my only option was to seek help from the wizard whom I trusted, who took me in to protect me from Voldemort.
I reached the gargoyle that I knew was the entrance to the Headmaster's office, but not knowing the password I paced in front of it.
The grinding noise startled me as the steps were revealed. Just as I approached the heavy wooden door he called out, "Come in Miss Xavier."
I entered still feeling slightly edgy, "Have a seat."
I sat in a large red armchair opposite the aged wizard. He sat looking at me inquisitively above his glasses.
"So, what do I owe this visit, Miss Xavier?"
Better just to get this out, seeing as I have no alternative, "Professor Snape has informed me that Mr. Malfoy has interests in me to become a Death Eater."
"Yes, I am aware of that. The question is what do you want to do about that?"
Looking down and fidgeting with my ring again, I said, "I don't want to be a Death Eater. And I..."
"What if you were to become one and perhaps relay valuable information in the process? It could help us win this war, as I'm sure you are aware."
"That's the problem sir. I know of the benefits, but I fear the lure of it would unleash the monster that I only hold control over by a tread and even that slips at times."
"I understand your fears, Miss Xavier, but I'm positive that we can manage to keep the darkness at bay."
I laughed softly at that, now feeling even more alone than I ever have, knowing I was actively going to join a battle that my chances of survival were slim and not to mention the chances of my soul surviving at all.
As if reading my thoughts, Dumbledore said, "You will not be alone if you choose to accept this mission," he paused, waiting for me to look up before continuing. "Do you accept this? To be a spy for the light?"
I sighed, in reality I had decided this course of action a long time ago, only now confronted with it; I realized I wasn't fully prepared for this to happen so fast. I also could not refuse his request since he has helped me.
"Yes, I will." I locked my eyes with his.
"Very good, then, since you have accepted I need to inform you that Professor Snape will be your advisor on the proper protocol."
"Professor Snape, sir?"
"Yes, he will be your link between them and me. As no one will question your meetings with him but most certainly question to many meetings with myself."
This confirmed the reason why he didn't tell Lucius the truth about me. It also explains the tension between the two Death Eaters.
"I will inform him of our discussion and he will contact you from there."
"Thank you, sir, for giving me a chance. I hope I do not disappoint you."
"Goodbye Miss Xavier." After she left he said to Fawkes, "I hope she doesn't either, she's too dangerous on the other side."
//////
I startled awake, sitting up completely alert, to Draco standing next to the bed. His head was bowed, looking at me from under his golden lashes. "Are you okay?" glancing down to the discarded bedclothes still strewn on the floor. He cautiously picked up the sheets and wrapping them around my shoulders.
He sat next to me, as if he were afraid to really come near me. I leaned over on him as he tentatively wrapped his arms around me, holding me and kissing the top of my head. "I'm so sorry, Mercy, I could hear you scream. I swear I tried every spell I knew on the door, but it was to heavily warded."
"What could you have done, Draco?"
"Anything but wait until he left and even then your door was still warded."
I shook my head and sighed
"Come let's clean you up and get the hell out of here." He headed toward the bathroom.
"Draco, I'll be alright, go and pack up, after I shower then we'll go."
"Are you sure?" he didn't look convinced.
"Yes."
He turned and left and I went to the bathroom, after a look in the mirror, I gasped, blood streaked my cheeks, no wonder Draco looked at me that way. I turned the ornate handles to start the flow of water and stepped under the steaming spray.
I had to wash away all evidence of Lucius. I would not ask why or any other silly questions like that, I knew why. Lucius and I are not much different in that respect. When we want something we take it, no matter who is willing or not.
We are both predators, only I have resisted most of my predatory impulses for the last two years. And where did resisting get me? Weakened. I had taken for granted my immortal strength. But that was about to change. Wizard blood was so much stronger than Muggle blood, obviously, so I could regain my strength in a short amount of time if I had a few magical donors.
After washing myself and my hair, I stepped out of the shower. I worked on a plan for revenge as I dried off and dressed in a black dress with billowing sleeves.
I decided to tell Draco as soon as we returned to school. I checked my appearance in the full length mirror; my dress like all I brought with me was floor length and had a bit of a train. I was reminded of my mother; she had many gowns like this. Silver satin lined the sleeves and bottom hem. As I brushed my hair, I noticed the faint silver line on my left cheekbone, the only evidence of the previous night with Lucius.
I left my hair down, and packed everything I brought, and then transfigured the bag to fit in my pocket. I pulled the black wool cloak around my shoulders and left the room.
I could feel Lucius near when I entered the hall. Thoughts briefly crossed my mind of taking him then, but quickly were dispersed by the pride to not take a weakened man, I am better than that, another time, another place, we would meet again.
I descended the staircase and entered the foyer, Narcissa entered from the right, standing in front of me with tears in her eyes she lifted her delicate fingertips to caress the scar on my cheek and pulled her hand away to trace a similar scar on her own.
She smiled sadly and embraced me in a warm maternal hug. "It will be over soon, I promise." I spoke softly for her ears only. I gave myself over the her embrace, tears flooded my eyes as I remembered my own mother's last embrace before she told me to leave and save myself, just a short time ago.
Narcissa pulled away holding me at arms length, I bowed my head and wiped my tears quickly on the sleeve of my gown, when I looked back up into her pale blue eyes, she released me and greeted her son, who was now descending the stairs.
Narcissa approached and embraced her only child, which he firmly returned. I heard him ask, "Where is Lucius?"
"Oh, he is still in bed. I believe he has come down with something." She smiled toward me, approvingly.
Draco released her and stood next to me placing a protective hand on the small of my back. "I'm glad to have met you Mercedes." She said.
"Thank you, again for inviting me into your home."
"Take care of each other." She handed Draco a silver chalice, "Have a safe journey."
I nodded and reached for the goblet, Draco's fingers interlaced with mine around it, and he held my free hand, I felt the tug behind my stomach.
When I felt the ground under my feet once more, I opened my eyes to see the gates of Hogwarts. I looked up into Draco's stormy gray eyes, and released my hand from his, pulling up the hood of my cloak. We walked side by side along the path towards the double doors.
When we stepped into the school, students were here and there, from various houses socializing. It seemed noticeably more silent when we entered and the noise picked back up as we made our way down through the dungeons.
We entered his room and sat by the fireplace which was lit when we walked in. The large armchairs were comfortable, and we both stayed silent waiting.
"Can you feel something different about me?"
:"Yes, I've noticed some things."
"Once I tell you, my life is in your hands. I trust you enough to tell you."
"I understand."
"Everything I've told you so far has been the truth; only certain things were left out." I stated finally turning to face him to better gauge his reaction.
"Go on," he prompted.
I slid off the chair to kneel between his long legs, and lifted his hands holding them in my own, looking up into his angelic face, praying for some sort of salvation.
"Draco, I'm a vampire."
Waiting a few seconds watching the information to process He looked at me intently then smiled. "Come on, I thought you were serious."
I lifted his hands to my face, "Draco, look at me, whatever term you use, that's what I am. Now that I've told you, the charm is broken, and you will feel it more now.
"Mercy, stop it." He tried to pull his hands away but my strength held him still looking into his eyes.
He averted his gaze past me and into the fire. "Get out."
"No. Look at me."
His cold eyes shifted to mine, "Get away from me."
"I'm not leaving until I'm ready." I knew telling him was a risk and alienating his space was another but I would stay until he had his say. It would do neither of us good if he just stewed in his own feelings of betrayal. "Draco, I know you're angry right now. I know you feel I've betrayed you for not telling you, but you also must realize I have told you and also the reasons that I've waited to tell you. You know that I care a great deal for you and even telling you, at any time put me in danger."
He looked into my eyes and nodded "If telling me was so dangerous, why do it then?"
"Because you would find out eventually and I wanted it to be from me."
"I see, that way no one else could tell me and use that disloyalty against you."
"Yes."
"Does anyone else know?"
"Dumbledore does, of course, and Snape just found out."
"How do you, you know, eat?" His curiosity overriding his apprehension.
"I drink a potion that allows me to eat like humans and decreases the need for blood."
"Decreases? But doesn't eliminate?"
"Yes'
Realization settled into his eyes, his hand caressed the spot I had bitten two nights ago, "You fed off me?!" he exclaimed. Fury replaced realizations as he stood to distance himself from me and paced.
"I can't believe you did that."
"Draco, it was an accident, I swear, I lost control, and I'm sorry."
"How many times have you done it?"
"Just the once."
"Do you change, physically I mean?"
"Sort of."
"Can I see?"
"Draco, it's not something I can just turn on and more importantly turn off. Unless you're offering? Or any strong aggressive emotion, anger, pain."
He looked anxious for a moment pacing, then he walked over to his bedside table, opening the drawer and withdrew a dagger. My own eyes widened for a moment unsure of his intentions he unsheathed it and walked toward me. I was careful not to flinch away from him he drew the dagger with his left hand wincing when he cut into his right mound of Venus, offering me his hand.
I closed my eyes for a moment, felling my eyes dilate and change the black overflowing the blue of my irises, and my teeth extend. Keeping my eyes closed, inhaling the scent of fresh blood.
"If that is not and offering, Draco, please wrap your hand." When I opened my eyes, he had moved closer to me, his hand just a fraction from my mouth. He startled for a moment looking into my eyes, but held still. I pulled his hand closer to my mouth and licking his self-inflicted wound, closing it. I released his hand and quickly stepped back before I lost complete control.
Draco looking back from his hand to me and back again. "Please, Draco, no more parlor tricks. "I breathed.
"Sorry."
"It's alright, you had to see for yourself, I understand, but no more, you are very hard to resist."
He smirked at that, I went to retrieve my bag, pulling my flask out, swallowing a swig, and recapped it. We both returned to our seats by the fire.
From across the room he asked, "Does this make you immortal?"
"Partly, anything, anyone can be killed if you know how, but given the best circumstances I will live for centuries."
"Does this also mean you can make me into one?"
"Theoretically, yes, but Draco, I'm not strong enough, I'm surviving off a potion, but blood is what makes me stronger."
"With blood you could be strong enough to change me?"
"We call it 'embrace' and even with power, Draco, I wouldn't."
"Why not?" His voice raised in indignation.
"Draco, this is a curse not a blessing you are also to young to make any eternal decision."
"But I'm old enough to feed from?"
"I would appreciate if we could be adults, Draco. Anyway, what has happened between us has no lasting effects."
"Well obviously, I'm not an adult, and neither are you, when were you "embraced'? A year ago? So how much better are you?"
"Draco, please stop," I sighed this was not going the way I had hoped. "I was embraced twenty years ago; can you imagine being on the brink of death for days, weeks, or even years? Can you imagine begging for the final release that only death will bring and because of what you are you will never know peace?"
He seemed to consider it for a few minutes, "In a few years, Draco, when you have had time to consider what I've said, and then yes I will embrace you. But I won't hold it against you if you change your mind."
"A few years?"
"Yes, after that and after the war, then those years will mean nothing as far as time. But experience is invaluable."
"I've read that vampires have certain powers, is that true?"
"Yes, but my powers are altered, because I'm not just a vampire and not just a witch, my powers are blended. I don't remember which ones are origin specific anymore, telecommunication is one gift."
"Have you ever been inside my mind?" he looked suspicious.
"No, I wouldn't."
"Why not, if you can, why wouldn't you?" his typical Slytherin morals evident.
"You already know how it feels like, being invaded. Mental mind rape and I only use that ability in extreme cases."
We both sat in silence for a while, contemplating, finally I rose "Draco, I'm really tired if you don't mind I'm going to bed."
"You can still sleep here; you don't have to go back."
"Thank you, Draco for everything, but I really need rest and I don't want to distract you." I smiled and leaned over to kiss him softly on his lips.
"Goodnight, Mercy." He said quietly.
I turned grabbed my bang and left. My last thoughts before sleep finally overcame was my life in Draco's hands and if he would turn me over to his father and other Death Eaters to my fate.
//////
We walked along the dungeon corridors the stone keeping the air cool around us. I followed Professor Snape into his classroom and beyond towards his office. Books lined the far wall and to my right sat his desk, clear of anything, exposing the rich mahogany wood.
I sat in a wooden chair in front of his desk as he closed and warded the door as well as the fireplace behind me. I sat fingering my ring around my left middle finger. I realized my habit of that long ago, but continued to do so as I felt it released nervous energy, and right now Snape's ominous presence made me slightly edgy, probably a side effect of the last time I was alone with a Death Eater in a heavily warded room.
Snape sat in his leather chair behind his desk, his piercing eyes studying and evaluating my present state of mind. I realized that this was the first time he has seen me like this. I stopped fiddling with my moonstone, seeing that it could be mistaken as a sign of vulnerability and looked up into his eyes, waiting for him to explain why he pulled me away from breakfast.
Not that I was hungry, of course, since the amount of blood I stole from Lucius was substantial I wouldn't feel the urge for blood for a while. Satisfaction on wizard blood was always difficult to judge, as their magical ability seemed to alter the strength and longevity of their blood. And since I drained Lucius as much as I thought I could go longer than I've had before, without the feeling of loss of control.
Yes, even in the cold dungeons with the fearsome Professor's eyes boring into mine, I was quite warm.
It seemed Snape and I were engaging in a battle of wills as to who would speak first. I really wasn't sure I could trust him, since he knew to much as it was.
"I gather you had an eventful stay at Malfoy Manor," he said in low silky dangerous tones.
"Yes," I confirmed.
"It seems Mr. Malfoy has suffered extreme blood loss. Care to enlighten me?"
"Whatever are you talking about?"
"Miss Xavier, do not waste my time," he warned.
"He deserved everything he gets and more." I wasn't really confirming any information and I was unnerved by Snape's involvement.
"I am positive he did, Miss Xavier, but Mr. Malfoy wants answers, as you are most likely aware of the kind of man he is, he will stop at nothing to get the information he seeks."
"How do you know about his apparent condition?"
"I was called to Mr. Malfoy's sickbed last evening and I administered the appropriate potion for his complete recovery."
I have to admit, he did warn me about going but does that mean he and Mr. Malfoy are not nearly as close as others would imagine? I could sense animosity between the two, surely, but I couldn't be certain.
"Oh, so Mr. Malfoy is well again?" I thought about leaving now and leaving them to their war, but I knew I would regret it.
"Yes, he is, but he believes you cursed him with some obscure curse, he has no reason to think otherwise."
"You did not tell him? Why? I mean how should I believe I can trust you with the valuable information about me?"
"No, I didn't and as far as the rest you will have to trust me."
"I'm sorry, sir, but in my lifetime trust is not something I have very much of."
"Then we are at an impasse, neither of us trust the other with any more information."
"It would seem so." I paused, finally breaking eye contact and looking over at his bookshelves. "How long do you believe I have before Lucius retaliates?"
"He already has," My eyes returned to his in surprise. "But for now it is not anything you should fear, in fact he seems quite impressed by your talents, as well. His angrier that he underestimated you so his is wise enough to not make the same mistake with you twice. He has related his information to higher sources, as it were, and your services will be requested shortly."
"My services?"
"Yes, there are those whom feel you would be an asset to the cause. You should expect an invitation, which is more of a demand, than a request. Failure and refusal are not options."
//////
I left Snape's office when the bell rang but I really didn't want to go the History of Magic. I roamed the halls for a bit.
I was to receive and invitation to join the Death Eaters, and by Snape's account it was rare a woman was ever made one, and it would require a test of sorts.
I did not come here to become one of them; my parent's did not die for me to become one of them.
I felt that my only option was to seek help from the wizard whom I trusted, who took me in to protect me from Voldemort.
I reached the gargoyle that I knew was the entrance to the Headmaster's office, but not knowing the password I paced in front of it.
The grinding noise startled me as the steps were revealed. Just as I approached the heavy wooden door he called out, "Come in Miss Xavier."
I entered still feeling slightly edgy, "Have a seat."
I sat in a large red armchair opposite the aged wizard. He sat looking at me inquisitively above his glasses.
"So, what do I owe this visit, Miss Xavier?"
Better just to get this out, seeing as I have no alternative, "Professor Snape has informed me that Mr. Malfoy has interests in me to become a Death Eater."
"Yes, I am aware of that. The question is what do you want to do about that?"
Looking down and fidgeting with my ring again, I said, "I don't want to be a Death Eater. And I..."
"What if you were to become one and perhaps relay valuable information in the process? It could help us win this war, as I'm sure you are aware."
"That's the problem sir. I know of the benefits, but I fear the lure of it would unleash the monster that I only hold control over by a tread and even that slips at times."
"I understand your fears, Miss Xavier, but I'm positive that we can manage to keep the darkness at bay."
I laughed softly at that, now feeling even more alone than I ever have, knowing I was actively going to join a battle that my chances of survival were slim and not to mention the chances of my soul surviving at all.
As if reading my thoughts, Dumbledore said, "You will not be alone if you choose to accept this mission," he paused, waiting for me to look up before continuing. "Do you accept this? To be a spy for the light?"
I sighed, in reality I had decided this course of action a long time ago, only now confronted with it; I realized I wasn't fully prepared for this to happen so fast. I also could not refuse his request since he has helped me.
"Yes, I will." I locked my eyes with his.
"Very good, then, since you have accepted I need to inform you that Professor Snape will be your advisor on the proper protocol."
"Professor Snape, sir?"
"Yes, he will be your link between them and me. As no one will question your meetings with him but most certainly question to many meetings with myself."
This confirmed the reason why he didn't tell Lucius the truth about me. It also explains the tension between the two Death Eaters.
"I will inform him of our discussion and he will contact you from there."
"Thank you, sir, for giving me a chance. I hope I do not disappoint you."
"Goodbye Miss Xavier." After she left he said to Fawkes, "I hope she doesn't either, she's too dangerous on the other side."
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