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TITLE: Soul Seeking Part 1
SERIES: Casualties
AUTHOR: Peter J. Frigate
EMAIL: thetwis...gmx.de (thats my 'mostly spam' email, so I might miss your mail, if you want my personal email, just ask me)
FEEDBACK: Yes, please. Public, private, constructive, negative, I don't care. I don't even mind flames.
ARCHIVE/DISTRIBUTION: I post the chapters on the Buffy newsgroup, and usually a bit later on If you want to put my stuff on your page, I'll probably hug and kiss you, but you still have to ask first. I like to keep track of where my things go. In return, I'll offer to mail you any new chapters/stories or corrections.
TIMEFRAME: After the end of Season Six
'PREVIOUSLY ON': After being drained by Willow, Giles is in the
hospital's ICU, his body unable to function on it's own. Dawn figured
out the reason, Willow took more than the magic, she took Giles'
lifeforce. And she's the only one who can return it. The only problem:
when Willow let go of the magic, a part of her was lost as well. She is
currently in a mental institution, being unable to hold any thought for
more than a few seconds. Dawn has found a spell to restore her, and
convinced her sister to perform it. A call to Angel to come and protect
Buffy's body left them stranded with Spike. Not having any other
choice, they have decided to go through with the spell.
Part 5 - Soul Seeking Part 1
A deep, slow thunder rumbled around the young, blonde woman, moving from her left to her front, then the right. "Where am I?" she asked with a scared voice. "WHO am I?". Looking down, she noticed that she was bare feet, clothed in white soft leather, reminiscient of the early native american tribes. "Hello?"
She could clearly hear a female voice, but not make out the words it said. Looking around, she couldn't see the speaker either. It was only now that she noticed she couldn't see much of anything. All around here were clouds, a thick fog and the soft sound of rumbleing thunder in the distance. She tried to concentrate on the ground, but as odd as it seemed, it was like she was standing inside the fog, with no noticeable ground beneath her.
Scared and confused, she wandered around, trying to find anything but fuzzy white forms. "Hello, can anyone hear me?"
"You have to focus. Try to listen to me!" The female voice said,
sounding worried. "Concentrate on what I am saying. Can you hear me?"
"Yes, yes, I can hear you, who are you?"
"I'm Dawn, and you are Buffy. Try to remember, Buffy. You are my sister."
The blonde woman looked around confused. 'Sister?' It didn't sound right, she was certain she had no sister, even though she could not remember why she was so certain. "Where am I?"
"You are in the nether world, the spirit realm. Try to remember how you got here. Try to trace back your steps. It's important!" The voice stressed, sounding a bit shakey. "Focus on my voice, and let it lead you to your memories!"
She tried to do what the voice told her, focus on the voice, the words,
trying to concentrate. Suddenly, a dim green light appeared before her,
growing in intensity until it was blindingly bright. "Are you this
green ball of light?"
"Yes, that's me. Look into the light, try to remember." The voice softly answered, now sounding like the voice of a young woman close to tears. "Try to remember me, Buffy."
"Dawn! Dawn, where am I? How did I get here?" Suddenly the young woman remembered that her name was Buffy, and that she was talking to her sister. "Dawn?"
---
With an audible cracking sound, the neck of the vampire snapped, as
Spike nearly twisted off his head, panting hardly. "You OK back there?
Sorry for the ruckus."
"Spike, you have to keep those things away from me." Dawn looked up from her position, lying in a perfect three-bladed star, head to head with her sister and Willow, both of them still unconscious. "If you keep letting them interrupt me, we might lose Buffy. Right now I'm the only thing keeping her mind where it belongs."
"You heard the lady, Spike, so stop slacking off!" Xander shouted aggressively, despite the fact that he spent most of the fight knocked out in a corner.
"I'm going back into the link, make sure nothing disturbs my body until I am done. Willow and Buffy can't wake up, but I'm just in trance, even kicking or hitting me will pull me out." Dawn explained as she lay back down, pushing her head against the head of her sister and the head of her former best friend. She was glad that neither of them noticed the single tear that rolled down her cheek.
---
"Dawn! Dawn! Where are you?" Buffy screamed into the fog.
"I'm back, I'm sorry Buffy. Do you remember where we are?" Dawn tried her best to ignore the previous interruption, knowing that things were at a critical phase right now.
"No, I'm in some sort of mist or nebular. I can't see anything. How did I get here?"
"The spell, Buffy. You are in the spirit realm. Remember, you are here to follow the path Willow's magic took."
"Yes, right, the magic. To get Willow's missing piece back, right? The part of her that died when the magic left?" As she said the words, her memory of them came back. She felt as if she just woke up, facts and thoughts dropping into her mind only as she focussed on them specifically.
"Yes, Buffy. Try to picture the magic, and then try to picture Willow."
As Buffy followed her sister's instructions, an image of Willow, her
best friend, appeared in the mist. Only moments later, a distorted,
twirling storm of dark colors formed around her friend's image. "Those
colors, is that the magic?"
"Yes, Buffy. Now just remember the last moments, remember what Xander told us about them. How Willow broke down, how the magic started to leave her. You will see it moving, and you have to follow her." Dawns voice went silent for a moment, then continued. "I can't guide you from here on out anymore. Once you start following the path, time will move differently for you, and we won't be able to communicate anymore. Just remember your task, remember what you have to do and that you have to go back. Do you have any questions before I leave?"
"Why is the magic so dark and twirls so violently Dawn? I thought you said that magic was natural, that it would naturally flow around things?"
"You are in the spirit realm, Buffy. You only see the truth here.
Willow's magic was never natural or peaceful." Dawn's vocie was cold
and hard now. "Willow turned her magic into an abomination long ago."
"Wish me luck." Buffy said loudly into the mist, and the started to follow the path the thunderstorm of dark colors took as it left the image of her friend.
---
"Alright, she is gone. Now all we can do is wait." Dawn said as she stood up, looking down at her sister. "Let me get a weapon."
"Not to worry anyone or anything, but there's been quite a lot of
uninvited guests here while you were gone, Dawnster. I'm not sure how
we are going to survive this for a whole week. I mean, we have to sleep
some time, don't we?" Xander asked as he handed her a sword. "Also,
there's vampires here, and I don't talk about Captain Peroxide, without
an invitation."
Dawn sighed. "I told you, as long as the spell is in effect, this house
emmanates too much mystical energy to be protected by the usual rules.
But on the plus side, nothing can get in here as long as Buffy and
Willow are in broad daylight. So during the times Spike is refined to
the basement, we can sleep and recover."
"Still not gonna be a pleasant week, Dawn. Are you sure you don't have any other favors you can call in to help us?" Spike asked, carefully avoiding to look at her or to call her any of his usual nicknames.
"No one, unless Riley answers the message we left for him. No one from AI that could come either?"
"No, definitly not. Peaches might love Buffy more than life itself, but he is not going to risk his son, not even for her."
Xander scoffed. "Pretty quick to give up his supposedly one and everything."
"You think if Angel called during the last weeks before Glory's ritual,
asking Buffy to send him help, that she would have even considered
sending one of you lot to LA to help Angel instead of Dawn?" Spike shot
angrily at Xander.
Xander was about to reply, as two seven feet demons crashed through the windows in unison, forcing all three of them to concentrate on fighting.
---
"You shouldn't be here." A dark, distorted voice growled through the dark mist.
"Why not?" Buffy challenged, not knowing who she was talking to, but not ready to back down. Nothing was known about this part of her voyage, so Dawn hadn't been able to tell her much, besides that the fact that she never, EVER could back down from a challenge. "And who are you, anyways?"
"I'm D'Korth, one of the many beings that your friend murdered in her path. I will not let you pass." Buffy stiffened, taking a combat stance. "Your slayer powers can't help you here, little girl. Just back down and go home."
Buffy considered her answer for more than a few moments before looking towards the path ahead of her. "I'm sorry, I don't particularily remember you. But I know for sure that if Willow killed you, she did so in attempt to stop you from hurting others."
"Very well. You may pass on the reasoning that your friend killed me in
defense of the weak and helpless." The demonic voice grumbled. Buffy
smiled, but was quickly put down. "Understand that you will not be able
to pass with this reasoning again. There are many inqueries ahead, and
you can not give the same answer twice." With that, Buffy felt the
demonic presence disappearing, and the fog lost a bit of its darkness.
She returned to the path, walking slowly as she realized that this
would not be as easy as it seemed when she decided on doing it.
---
"Dawn. I think we need to talk."
"Yes, I believe we have to. So you noticed it to?" Dawn asked, warily
eyeing the stairways to the basement. "The last guy was a warlock,
wasn't he?"
"I think so, Dawn. Maybe we should call Anya?"
"Call me?" The vengeance demon teleported into the room. "What's going on?"
"An, could you take a look at our latest body?" Xander asked, directing her to the dead warlock.
"Yes, that's a dead warlock. Good work, team! Why am I here?" Anya asked impatiently.
"Uh, Anya, this guy, he's a magic user, correct?" Dawn inquired carefully.
"Yes, obviously. That's pretty much what 'warlock' means." She sounded a bit bored.
"A magic user, a human, correct?" Xander tried to clarify.
"Yes. Is there going to be a point?"
"Spike killed him." Dawn explained somberly.
"So what you are saying is that Spike, who is currently in your basement, just killed a human without flinching?" Anya asked, now worried as well.
---
"Buffy." The familiar voice penetrated the dark fog.
"Angel." Buffy swallowed hard. "I take it you represent the next challenge?"
"Yes, obviously. I am here to ask you why you are willing to save the woman who let me die."
"Let you die? What are you talking about? You are alive, I mean,
undead-alive, or whatever!" Buffy shouted angrily.
"But that does not change the fact that I died. You rammed a sword through my heart, don't you remember?" Angel said coldly.
"But you came back, you forgave me! This has nothing to do with Willow!" Buffy yelled as a flow of tears ran down her cheeks.
"But I also died. I died because Willow didn't perform the spell sooner. She is the reason I died. Turn back now, it's the only way you can escape the same punishment she suffers for her thoughtlessness."
After thinking a moment, Buffy answered. "Willow did not hesitate to cast the spell because of thoughlessness or ignorance. She waited because she was humble, because she did not consider herself equal to the thousand-year-old heritage of the gypsy clan that cursed you. If you blame her for that, you can as well blame me!"
"Very well. You may pass on the reasoning that your friend's humblety prevented her from casting the spell sooner. You have used up another reason, young slayer. Don't forget that at some point you will have to face the fact that you have run out of excuses." With that, Buffy again felt the presence leave, and unlike the last time, she realized that the presence that challenged her was not her former lover, but a simple representation of events. Wiping the tears she shed earlier she continued on the path, more determined than ever to reach her destination.
---
"Yes, I did. My chip has been removed."
The same moment each of the three scoobies heard Spike, they raced to the box in the corner to grab crosses, holy water and stakes. "Back the hell off, Spike! Your chip might have protected you this far, but you are going down now!" Xander yelled, leaping at the vampire.
With one carefree motion Spike backhanded Xander into the nearest wall.
"I told you that I made sure that I could never hurt Buffy or any of
you again." He said, looking at Dawn, who was holding a cross
defensively, looking scared and hurt. "I meant it."
"And how is that? You just hit Xander. I didn't see you flinch. Why should I believe what you say?" Dawn asked angrily, in her mind considering the options. After a moment, she realized that there was nothing she could do to stop Spike. If he wanted, he could kill all three of them before they had time to break a sweat.
"Dawn." Spike looked beat and hurt, despite not having been hit at all.
"Can we go to the kitchen, talk alone?"
"I don't think so. I know you could kill me where I stand, backup or not, but whatever you have to say, you can say it in front of all of us. What keeps you from killing all of us right now?"
"What keeps Angel from hurting Buffy, niblet?" Spike asked,
unconsciously falling back into his old speaking pattern. "After what I
did, I realized that the chip did not stop me from hurting people I
cared for. So I took care of it." He looked at the body of Buffy on the
floor, swallowing hard. "I took care of it."
"Angel? Are you trying to say ..." Xander asked while getting back on his feet.
"I'm saying that I made sure I would never again hurt people I cared about. 'Least I thought as much. Didn't do me much good when I barged in here yesterday."
"You ... for her?" Dawn asked, her voice shakey. She sat down on the floor, not being able to keep her legs under control anymore. "You are like Angel?"
"Yes." Spike answered, still looking at Buffy's body. He hated the comparison, it was not even remotely accurate, but this was not the time to debate semantics.
"How? How did you do it? Did you see Lloyd?" Anya suddenly yelled. She had been quiet during the whole conversation, trying to make sense of what she heard.
"Yes." Spike repeated.
"But he doesn't just hand out ... oh god, did you go through ..." Anya swallowed. She walked towards Spike, taking his chin in her hand. "Look at me!" She commanded, then adding in a tiny voice: "Did you?"
"Yes." Spike said for a third time.
"You can trust him." Anya said firmly, turning back to the other two.
"He won't hurt us."