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Arianna: Why, hello! I'm really rather confused about what I'm doing here right now. I was going to work on the next chapter of FEI, and I somehow ended up in this story instead!
Serra: =hides mind control remote= What? Why does everyone always suspect ME?
Erk: =sigh=
Arianna: Well, since I'm here, I might as well write another chapter. :D
Matthew: =steals remote= You shall now do the 'Funky Chicken'! =hits button=
Arianna: Wha- sorry, folks! I'm suddenly feeling a strong urge to do the 'Funky Chicken'. =starts dancing=
Serra: MATTHEW! GIVE THAT BACK! =grabs it back and hits rewind=
Arianna: Now, as I was saying, here's another chap-
Eliwood: Wow, cool! =grabs remote= You will now be in love with Bartre! =presses button=
Arianna: =spots Bartre= Oh, my love! You have returned to me! =hugs Bartre=
Karla: =WHAM= My man! =drags Bartre off=
Bartre: Doh….byebye…
Arianna: Ouch. My head…
Eliwood: HAHAHAHAHA!
Serra: GRRRR! =grabs it back and hits rewind again=
Arianna: -ter of 'Protecting The Devil'! =snatches remote and hits 'PLAY'=
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DISCLAIMER: No FE for poor, moneyless me! Oh, and although Wil does get made fun of a couple times, it doesn't mean I don't like him. It's just that I don't think Erk would be too thrilled with having a social person like Wil around when he's in a situation he finds irritating.
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-=: ERK'S POV :=-
- - -
Trot Trot Trot
"And it would just look darling on you, Lyn-"
Thump
"You know, Erk, you seem to be a gloomy fellow."
Twitch
"Do you really think so, Serra? I always-"
Trot Trot Trot
"I'm positive! I know fashion. And believe me, Lyn-"
Thump
"You should try to lighten up a bit. I mean, it can't be fun to be so grumpy all the time."
Twitch
"Well, then maybe I'll try that sometime, Serra."
Trot Trot Trot
"You really should. It might even make you almost as pretty as me! Teehee!"
Thump
"This is going to be quite a long trip. And I just don't think you have the right attitude."
"And just how long do you suppose this trip is going to take?" I finally said. I had been listening to all this for the past few hours. Let me explain what has been going on in simpler terms.
People With Hooved Animals That Go Trot: Kent, Sain, Florina
The Fashion Advisor: Serra
Thumper: Dorcas
Mood Therapist: Wil
Twitchy: Me.
Polite Listener: Lyn
If you had to listen to these people for hours you would be twitching too. Especially the archer. He seems to be the talkative type. Not that there's anything wrong with that. The more talkative, the better. Someone to keep Serra busy. But sadly, Wil seemed more interested in talking to me than Serra. And Serra was left trying to give fashion tips to a tomboyish swordfighter.
"Oh, only about two more weeks at most." Wil replied, smiling. He didn't seem to ever stop smiling. It got aggravating. Although I don't know why I would find happy people aggravating. Hmmm…maybe I am gloomy.
"Oh, wonderful." I remarked, sarcastically. I'm very good at sarcasm. It's a hobby. "So at least now I don't even have a hope of finishing my mission of escorting the Devil Cleric soon." Wil kept right on smiling, but he had a flicker of confusion in his eyes. He seemed to realize there was something wrong with my reply. This guy was either a hopeless fool or a hidden genius. My gold is on the former.
After an hour more of the nerve-grating noises and senseless chatter, we came to a big city. The city of Araphen. That would be pronounced Are-ah-fen. Quite easy, no? But as with everything involved with this group, things had to be made complicated.
"A-rap-hen," said Serra, "We're finally here!" Yes, she said it wrong. Most people would have just let it go. But no, not Kent. Not 'Everything Must Be Right' man. He had to make a big ordeal out of it.
"Ah, Miss Serra…" he said. I could tell just from that that whatever he had to say was not going to do us any good. Just one of my hunches. And it was right. "It's pronounced Are-ah-fen." Kent corrected. Serra immediately argued back.
"Is not! It's A-rap-hen!" she insisted. Then put her hands on her hips. "Are you suggesting that I'm stupid?" she demanded, glaring at Kent.
"No! Of course not!" he hastily said. "But, Miss Serra, I'm sure it's Are-ah-fen." he persisted. I wanted to slap him for his stupidity. Couldn't he see that his efforts were in vain?
"A-rap-hen!" she screeched back.
"Are-ah-fen." he repeated.
"A-rap-hen!"
"Are-ah-fen!"
"A-RAP-HEN!"
"AGH! Why don't I go ask the marquess himself how to pronounce it?" Kent yelled. Then he shouted over his shoulder to Sain. "Sain! I'm going to the castle!" And he rode off. Serra stuck her tongue out at his rapidly disappearing figure as he blended into the crowds of the streets. I sighed for what felt like the millionth.1 time this mission.
"What city is this?" I heard Lyn say, coming up behind Serra and I.
"This?" Sain replied. Which I thought was a rather good example of stating the obvious. "This is Are-ah-fen! After Ostia, it's the second biggest city in Lycia." he said. Serra opened her mouth to protest but I shut it quickly for her with my hand.
"The second biggest, hm? It does seem awfully busy." Lyn said. These folks were rather gifted with words of obviousness that most people wouldn't bother remarking on. They continued to talk for a few more seconds until we saw Kent approaching.
"Milady Lyndis! Let us proceed to the castle." he called out when he got closer. "They've prepared supplies for us. The marquess has agreed to aid us on our journey to Caelin." He said.
"He's going to help us?" asked Lyn. I restrained myself from slapping my forehead in irritation. Must these people always talk about the obvious? How do their conversations ever get anywhere? I decided I'd rather talk to Serra then continue listening to them.
"Serra." I said. She was questioning random people on the street about the pronunciation problem and didn't like the results.
"What?" she asked, turning away from a confused villager and facing me.
Hmm…I hadn't actually thought of anything to say. There was an awkward silence as she stared at me, waiting for me to speak. I was saved when an assassin jumped out of nowhere, threatening Lyn. Then she was saved when an arrow went whizzing by and straight into the assassin's back. I spun around to see a Sacaen man on a horse. A nomad, by the looks of him. And the ladies seemed to like the looks of him. Serra spotted him and started giggling. Arianna actually waved. Even Florina cast a few glances his way.
"What? An arrow?" Lyn said, turning around to see who had saved her. I almost screamed at her newest RDOO (Random Display Of Obviousness), but thought of something better to worry about. How come this guy was getting such a reaction from the females? Why didn't any of them act this way when seeing me for the first time? Not that I would want them to. It just would have been nice. Alright, I was jealous. Sue me.
"I am Wrath of the Kutolah." The archer on horseback was saying. "Our tribes may be different, but I will not abandon a woman of Sacae." he finished gallantly. Lyn almost swooned. Serra giggled again. I made a gagging gesture, but made it so only Wil could see. Then Wil giggled. Hm. Strange….
(A/N: Wil's giggling at Erk's gesture, not at Rath. This isn't a yaoi fic. Sorry yaoi fans.
Yaoi Fans: Awww… =they walk off with 'We Love Yaoi' banners=
And I know how to spell Rath's name. It's spelled different for story purposes. You'll see, eventually.)
"Thank you, Wrath! A thousand blessings upon you!" Lyn told nomad boy, smiling sweetly. Kent gave a glare of a thousand deaths. Apparently this new guy wasn't going down too well with any of the men.
"And a thousand curses upon our enemy!" he said. Sweet guy. Really.
As we moved forward, and Lyn and Wrath discussed some 'secret passageway', I fell back by Serra. "What do you girls see in him?" I asked. For once, I was the dumbfounded one. She giggled again before she answered.
"He's handsome! And noble! And a hero! He just saved Lyn's life!" Serra giggled. I frowned. I didn't see how that made him so special. I'm handsome. I'm noble. And I've saved Serra's life. How come no girls were swooning over me?
(Erk Fan Girls: =SWOON=)
I just snorted derisevly and walked up beside a sulky Kent. I watched as Lyn went in a house and came back out with a blonde haired fellow. By his slim figure, and the way his hands twitched every few seconds, I assumed he was a thief. The blonde man walked over to Arianna and intoduced himself.
"Pardon! You're Arianna, right? I'm Matthew!" he said. He then showed her his lockpick and my thoughts were confirmed. At least this one didn't seem to cause as big of an impact on the moods of the girls. All except for Serra. She, strangely, seemed to get very excited when she spotted Matthew. This, oddly enough, bothered me. But I went ahead and began fighting. A few minutes later, I saw Serra standing by a wall, looking around, nervously. I went over to see what her new issue of the day was.
"What's with you?" I asked in the nicest way I could manage at the time. Which was a little rude. But who could blame me? I didn't want to get signed up for camp 'Loser Legion'. She glanced at a nearby tree, than focused her eyes on me.
"I feel something….I feel it!!!" she said excitedly. I wasn't sure I wanted to know what she felt, but I let her continue. "Someone's staring at me! It must be some poor fool who's smitten with me. Alas, my beauty has rendered him speechless. Ah…I'm so cute, it's almost criminal!" she muttered, smiling to herself. I was amazed by how she managed to turn everything she said into a compliment for her. I looked over at the tree to see Matthew run from behind it and slip into the shadows of a nearby building. I really needed to find out what his connection was with Serra. He knew her somehow, because the look on his face when he first saw her was not a flirty one. More like stunned horrification.
I followed Matthew into the building, only to be attacked by a brigand. I quickly fried him with my fire, and crept to where Matthew and Arianna were standing by a chest. Arianna had apparently given her consent for Matthew to pick the lock on the chest, for Matthew was jumping up and down.
"Changed your mind? Hurrah! Treasure time! Treasure time!" How old was this guy, four? After 'borrowing' the things in the chests, Arianna told me to press the last trigger. I did and the passageway opened. We followed Wrath inside it and met with the marquess.
"Ah! It's Wrath!" he said. "You've done well. What a performance!" he exclaimed. Hmph. What about us? I was sick of this 'Wrath' person, so I walked back outside. At least I would never have to see him again. Although it looked like Matthew was staying with us. Back outside, I saw Matthew leaning on a wall. Serra was nearby. She kept glancing over at him with a small grin, and then looking quickly away.
'That's it.' I thought. 'I have to know what's going on!' I walked over to Serra and stood, blocking her view of the thief. "Who is he really and how do you know him?" I asked bluntly. Her reaction was proof that I was correct in assuming she knew him. Her eyes grew a fraction wider and her expression turned nervous.
"Wh-what are you talking about, Erky?" she asked in a sweet voice, "Who is what and how do I know them?" she said, playing stupid. I exhaled loudly. (Actually, I sighed again. I'm trying to make it sound more interesting, okay?)
"Fine, Serra." I said, "It's not like it could possibly be anything important." I turned around. "I mean, it's not like he's a spy or anything." I looked over my shoulder at her to see her jaw drop. Bingo.
"H-how did you…" she stammered. I smirked and strode over to the passageway opening just as Lyn came running out with Kent and Sain in tow.
"That was well done, milady!" Sain was saying. I couldn't see what was so well. They didn't have any supplies with them, or any guards. What happened in there? "The marquess is a lout. Don't worry about anything. We're all here for you!" Sain continued. He looked over at Kent. "Isn't that so, Kent?"
"I beg your forgiveness." Kent said, gloomily. He looked quite put-out indeed at whatever had happened with the marquess. It looked like a sappy moment was coming on, so I busied myself with gathering my tomes and vulneraries. I looked up when I heard the sound of hooves pounding on cobblestones. I saw Wrath approaching.
'Oh no!' I thought. 'Did they do something that could get us arrested?' I didn't relish the thought of spending a night locked in a cell with Serra. Or ketchup or mustard the thought. If they had gotten in trouble, so be it. But they weren't taking me down with them! I would grab Serra and make a run for it. But it turned out all my planning was for naught.
"Wrath! What is it? What are you-" Lyn started, but the nomad cut her off.
"I overheard the marquess talking to himself." He said. "Lyn of the Lorca…proud daughter of the Sacae…I would join you. I would add my strength to yours." UGH! So not only did we not get supplies, I now had to put up with this guy? Why must I always be cursed so? Lyn was excited, though, of course.
"Really?" she said happily. She looked like she was barely containing herself from hugging him. Kent gave Wrath another mean glare, then turned is head, feigning indifference.
"And this…I want you to take it." Wrath said, bringing out a pouch of something shiny and gold. Matthew was instantly by Lyn's side, staring at the money, greedily.
"This is…gold!?" Lyn exclaimed. GAH! The RDOO strikes again! "It's too much. I can't accept it." She said. She loses our chance at getting supplies and now she won't take the gold!? I was about to put my two sense in when Wrath persisted.
"I have no need for it." He insisted. "And if it will help you…" He gave Lyn a strange glance that made her almost melt. I got scared. What kind of powers does this 'Wrath' possess?
"But…." Lyn said, stubbornly. She just couldn't take the dang gold and be happy, could she?
"I cannot take back something once offered." Wrath cleverly said. Lyn finally gave in and took the gold from him, only to have it snatched away by Matthew who said that he would carry it for 'safe keeping'. Pah. Yeah right.
"Wrath…I thank you." Lyn said. Matthew scampered off grinning wildly, and Arianna chased him, screaming at him to let her hold the gold. I shoved my things into my small bag as Wil ran up with a clipboard.
"Hold on! Mr.Wrath! Can I get your name, please?" Wil asked, stupidly. Wrath just looked at him as blankly as he looks at anybody and told him his name. Wil wrote it down, than showed it to him. "Is that spelled right?" he asked. Wrath glanced at it and shook his head. I looked at clipboard to see what Wil had written.
"It's spelled correctly." I said, confused at why Wrath had shook his head. "W-r-a-t-h." I spelled, incase anyone in the group couldn't read. Some of them seemed a little dumber than average, so it was a possiblity.
Wrath shook his head again. "No. My name is spelled R-a-t-h." he said. Serra spoke up from behind, startling me and causing me to stumble forward and onto the ground in an act commonly called 'falling down'.
"Tee hee! Somebody must have taught you to spell your name wrong!" Serra said. "Wrath has a 'w' at the beginning." She stated. W/Rath just shook his head once more.
"No. I was taught right. No 'w'." W/Rath said. I could tell an arguement was coming. I climbed to my feet and distanced myself from Serra so as not to become the receiver of an arrow intended for Serra.
"I'm telling you, Wrath is spelled W-r-a-t-h!" Serra screeched. She seemed to be getting mad about nobody trusting her Elibean Language skills today. W/Rath just stared at her.
"And I'm telling you, it's spelled R-a-t-h." Rath evenly replied. Serra face was turning red in anger and probably embarrassment. She looked ready to start screaming, when Kent said the stupidest thing he could have possibly said.
"That reminds me, Serra. The marquess answered to 'Marquess Are-a-fen'. Not A-rap-hen." Kent said with a tiny, smug grin. Serra blew up at Kent.
"HE PROBABLY JUST DIDN'T WANT TO BOTHER CORRECTING AN IDIOT LIKE YOU!!!" she screamed. Kent flinched at the pitch of her voice, but looked ready to retort with a scathing comment. Rath beat him to it.
"Actually, it is Are-a-fen." Rath said. Serra lost it and started screaming at both of them. I covered my ears and wondered why every succesful fight seemed to end in chaos and misery. Most often, my misery. But we were one step closer to Caelin, and the end of my torment.
That thought comforted me as Serra's screams and screeches echoed into the quickly falling night.
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Latisha: Hehehe. Poor Erky-poo.
Erk: ……
Arianna: I don't know why this ended up Erk's POV for the whole thing. Next one I'll make sure Serra gets some thoughts in. I would also like to take this moment to remind all readers that I do not have anything against Wil or Rath. Or anyone else who gets made fun of. It's just my view from Erk's uptight personality.
Erk: Uptight? How am I uptight?
Eliwood: You just don't want flames from Wil or Rath fans.
Arianna: Hehe. =sweatdrop= Um…review responses!
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REVIEW RESPONSES
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:Zephire the Tactician:
You can have Wil if I get Raven! Wait, Raven isn't even in the story yet. Hmmm..oh well! I'll get him later! :) Thanks for the review!
:potter29vo:
I'm very glad you like it so much. :) I love your 'Nino's Life' story. And that JaffarxNino oneshot was the best! Thanks for the review. :D
:Wesley:
I know very well that he likes them. The nicknames were just for comical purposes. Plus, Erk's at that rebellious age…. Thanks for the review.
:Ice Angel Mina:
Your review confused poor, stupid me. What did Mizuki mean by "Still…"? Glad to know someone liked my odd little bit with Nergal and pizza. :D And I'm overjoyed that I actually inspired someone to write something. Thanks for the review!
:Duderly Bob:
I like your name. :) Hopefully Erk won't be getting tormented as much when the story gets to Eliwood's part. Thanks for the review!
:Serra19:
Glad you like it so much. :D It's a good thing that Darin never did take over the world. He's a little too stupid to run a whole world. Thanks for the review!
:Genocideking Archfiend:
YAY! An Erky picture! Thank you sooo much for the link! =hugs Genocideking=
Erk: Uhh…Riri. Some people don't like to be hugged by a crazy authoress.
Oopsies! So sorry. But I was very happy to see a full-body picture of Erk. :D Thanks for the review! Oh, and maybe Shadowknight could get cooking lessons from Lowen. :)
:Sparky:
Eeeeep! Please don't be mad! I know Wil is not a freak. But Erk has different views. Although out of all the members of the group so far, Erk seems to talk to Wil and Serra the most. :) Yes, CHEESE! I like cheese. Hehe. Thanks for the review!
:The Story Master:
HAHAHAHA! Kissy, kissy Erk!
Erk: Uh, I'll pass, thanks.
Then say bye bye to purple hair! MUHAHAHA!
Erk: How about I say bye bye to you? =runs=
Hmph. I'll get him to kiss her eventually. Thanks for the review!
:BrightBlueInk:
Thank you so much. :D I've always thought Serra was more interesting, also. I've never understood people who say she's 'annoying'. Can't they see that's what makes her so funny? :) Thanks for the review!
:Scarabsi:
Hehe, which part wasn't nice? Where he lost his tent or got lost with Serra or where he got attacked by a bandit or…hm…I think I see what you mean. :) Giggling insanely is fun. I do it often just to scare my parents. Kekekeke. :D Thanks for the review!
:DTN:
Wowsers, thanks for the compliments! :D I thought your NxJ A support was beautiful, if that's any comfort for almost being killed drawing it. Yes, another reviewer told me the link to a website where a full body picture of Erk was. Needless to say, I was thrilled. :) I hope you have more art up soon. I love all your work. Thanks for the review! Oh, and thanks for Raven. Hehe. I think you'll understand that last comment. :D
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Arianna: Okay, now what?
Eliwood: Uhh..you say bye?
Arianna: Oh, right! Bye y'all! See you (hopefully) next chapter!
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