Chapter 3. A food fight like no other.

It soon became apparent that something was happening in the kitchen; the something was there carer was making dinner. Soon they were led into a huge dining room (ooooooooohhhhhhhhhh aaaaaaaaaaaaaa). Gollum grabbed his fish and started scaling the chandelier. "Please find a seat," boomed their baby sitter. They quietly obeyed. Gollum was almost at the top of the huge hanging light, he pushed his fish on to a candle. It fizzed fitfully. "The fish is up, it's done," he hissed. With a final fizz the fish was burned in half and fell with wet splat to the table.

"The fissssh is down."

By now the food had arrived and grace was being said.

"Lord we thank you for this bountiful food…"

" And fish," added gollum

"And ale"

" And bows "

"And rin… WHERE IS MY RING!"

When they had all had added their respective item the very flustered baby sitter continued, only to be cut off by Pippin: "Mushrooms!"

Then began a food fight dinner like no other. Lothwen crept around the table; she paused next to Gilwen who was holding a large muffin. "Hello Gilwen," said the elfling sweetly "you don't want the muffin do you?" Grudgingly she handed it over. Delighted, Lothwen crept on and returned to her seat with a lot of food that wasn't hers.

Merry and Pippin were carefully building a catapult out of various cutlery using a candle as a welder. "No! No, stop, stop." cried their baby sitter before fleeing upstairs as sparks from the hobbit's candle flew onto the table. With great glee the Uruks gathered round it and gently blew on it, causing a great fire to start. "Aaaaaaaarrrrrrhhhh Mount Doom is exploding." Frodo screeched and fled the table followed by Sam.

Merry and Pippin began to fling corn across the table at the girls who screamed and ran into their room.

The Uruks were still singing, much to the horror of everyone else. By now every other person was contributing to the bedlam: Gollum was swinging dangerously on the chandelier "…rock and pool so nice and cool…" Aragorn was repeatedly charging into battle. The result: a lot of speared food; Gandalf was still fighting with Saruman; Legolas was whimpering under the table; the girls had fled long ago; Frodo and Sam had retuned to the fire; and yeah, you get the general idea.

An hour later the exited youngsters had been sent to bed. Legolas was first into the bathroom.

20 minutes later the Nazgul were charging the door with a battering ram, said door smashed and the squealing Nazgul ran in; a very untidy Legolas was dumped, whimpering, outside the door.

The Nazgul soon charged out again out, wearing matching pink robes. After a brief scuffle a line was formed to the bathroom, as there was no longer door. The girls went to find a better place to change. The Uruks however, splashed water on their faces and declared themselves clean.