Fatal Incompatibility.
Summary: James Potter has a secret. Lily Evans is trying to convince herself she doesn't care. "Trying" being the operative word. She can't get him out of her mind, he can only hope that she doesn't find out. (Eventual L/J)
Disclaimer: If this was mine would I need one of these? Alright I'm disclaiming! All the characters you recognise belong to JKRowling, anything you don't recognise is mine. ALL MINE!
Chapter 2: Turkey Season.
"I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it." - Groucho Marx
The following morning four Gryffindors sat at the breakfast table in the Great Hall, chatting happily. Well actually James chatted happily, whilst Peter groaned as he looked at his timetable and Remus and Sirius competed for the "I-do-not-do-mornings" award.
"What've we got first then, Pete?" James asked as Peter groaned loudly for the sixth time in 10 minutes.
"Transfiguration." He muttered dully, Sirius immediately sat up,
"Transfiguration?" he repeated weakly,
"Yeah" Sirius slumped onto the table, banging his forehead up and down against the hard wood. Remus looked amused,
"What've you done now?"
"I bang may have bang suggested to bang Peeves bang bang that McGonagall had expressed a bang interest in bang teaching her first bang class bang not to underestimate poltergeists." Remus caught the top of Sirius' head before he could slam it onto the table again.
"You did what?" James asked, his eyebrows rising. Sirius didn't make a comprehensible reply but Peter thought he made out some murmuring along the lines of 'somebodykillmenow.'
"But why would you do that?" Remus asked incredulously,
"What was the likelihood that we would have transfiguration first lesson? Somebody had told me they thought that 6th year Slytherins had it." Sirius started to look murderously around the room; James guessed he was looking for his unfortunate source.
"Well, Peeves has never listened to us before, he may not do anything." James said optimistically. The other 3 looked at him in sceptically, "OK, let's just hope it's not too bad."
The four stood up reluctantly and headed out of the Great Hall thinking about what Peeves might do to them, except for Sirius, who inexplicably was suddenly imagining Snape transfigured into a giant turkey.
The four waited outside the classroom until the door burst open of its own accord, quickly the class entered. The Marauders headed, as they usually did, for seats together at the back of the class but, before they could make it, a hand was placed on Sirius' shoulder, "I think Mr Black, it may be prudent for me to separate you from Mr Potter." Professor McGonagall said severely,
"Aw, but Professor!" James and Sirius moaned, but then Sirius spotted a empty chair next to Parisa Atri, a small dark haired girl, he winked at her, smiled at McGonagall and made his way over to the empty seat,
"Good idea Professor, always nice to broaden your friendship groups." James smirked as McGonagall glared at Sirius, who had just 'accidentally' tripped into Parisa's lap, before turning and sitting next to Remus.
The class soon settled down and turned their attention to McGonagall's speech "This year is very important, OWLs are approaching fast…" James yawned and turned to Remus,
"Why do I get the feeling I will be bored of this speech very soon?"
"Soon? I'm already bored." Remus sighed.
Suddenly the door burst open and Peeves screeched into the room, Peter glanced white faced at Sirius, who appeared to have resumed hitting his head on the desk.
"PEEVES!" screeched Professor McGonagall, her lips thinning dangerously. Peeves cackled happily, his eyes glinting. He quickly spotted Sirius banging his head on the table and took Sirius' lack of attention as an invitation to launch a water balloon at his head. Sirius swore loudly and leaped up as the class began to scream, racing under tables to avoid the rapidly flying balloons. James laughed as he banished a balloon back at Peeves.
Suddenly Sirius had had enough; he jumped onto the table and shouted "STOP!" at the top of his voice. Peeves stopped in the act of pelting Peter with whipped cream, now this was new. The class waited expectantly for Sirius to continue, even McGonagall seemed interested in this new turn of events, "You have to leave the room now!" Peeves frowned,
"Why?" He demanded petulantly, the class looked at Sirius,
"Er…because…" He racked his brains, "Peeves, I am your father!" There was a beat as the class looked at Sirius in shock, somebody giggled,
"No your not," Peeves said, completely dumbfounded,
"Er…well…yes…that would be true." He paused and then suddenly his face went pale and he pointed a finger at somewhere behind Peeves, "The Bloody Baron!" Peeves' face fell and with a last raspberry at the class he bounced away.
Everyone looked at Sirius, who was still standing on the desk with his finger pointing at the blank wall, "What?" he asked them, smiling evilly, Professor McGonagall pulled herself together,
"Get down from there Mr Black," She waved her wand and everyone was immediately dry, "Mr Black?" Sirius raised his head, trying to ignore James, who was doing an impersonation with Peter of Sirius standing on the desk,
"Peeves, I am your father!" Sirius glared at him and then turned to Professor McGonagall,
"Yes, Professor?"
"30 points to Gryffindor for your quick thinking." Sirius beamed,
"Thanks Professor."
"OK, the lesson is over, Mr Potter" James suddenly stopped his impersonation, "Please stay behind," James slumped and Sirius blew a raspberry at him in a way which was reminiscent of Peeves. The class filed out, still laughing at Sirius' antics, Remus clapped Sirius on the shoulder,
"Good thing no one knows it was you who gave Peeves the idea to come into class." He laughed, Peter suddenly spoke up, his face confused,
"Why did you say you were Peeves father?" Sirius went a little pink,
"It's a line from a muggle movie James and I saw in the holidays." Peter was about to ask what a movie was when Remus asked,
"I wonder why James had to stay behind." The others shrugged, they had no idea.
"Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly."
James looked anxiously at Professor McGonagall, trying to figure out what he'd done wrong while McGonagall tidied a pile of papers on her desk. "How long have you been on the Quidditch team, Mr Potter?" James frowned at the strange question,
"Since second year, so um, this would be my fourth year." McGonagall nodded her head,
"Who do you think should be Quidditch captain this year?" McGonagall looked at him evenly and James pondered the question,
"Well, Tristan Meadows has been on the team longest I guess…"
"Yes, I have spoken to Mr Meadows, he agrees with my decision." James felt a little sad for some reason,
"I'm sure he'll be a very good captain." He tried to inject some enthusiasm into his voice, McGonagall looked strangely at him.
"What are you talking about Potter? Mr Meadows isn't the captain."
"He's not?" James asked bemusedly,
"No, I have decided that you will fill the role better."
"ME?" James squeaked, "But…"
"Yes, Potter?"
"Nothing, Professor. Thank you, Professor." Professor McGonagall smiled thinly,
"Just try not to get in so much trouble this year Potter; else I may have to revise my decision." James nodded his head vigorously,
"Absolutely, I won't let you down, Professor."
"Good, because I would quite like to see that House Cup in my office this year." James smiled,
"See you in detention, Professor." McGonagall raised her eyebrows,
"What detention Mr Potter? I don't suppose that that is some new slang for Quidditch tryouts is it?" James caught on quickly and decided to leave before McGonagall changed her mind about letting him off detention,
"Good bye Professor."
"Good bye, Mr Potter."
James left Professor McGonagall's office with a bemused expression on his face; he walked back to the Gryffindor common room deep in thought: imagining elaborate twists and turns, scoring goals, dodging bludgers and of course, winning the Quidditch cup.
He had just passed the library when he crashed into somebody and fell flat on the floor. "Umph!" He scooped up his glasses and put them back on his long nose before looking around to see what he had crashed into. As soon as he saw who it was his face darkened, but he stood up and offered his arm graciously anyway, "Sorry Evans, I wasn't looking where I was going."
The small red haired glared up at him, her green eyes flashing, "I suppose you just expect people to get out of your way don't you?" she said angrily, ignoring his hand and scooping up her books.
"Maybe I was just going out of my way to bump into you Evans?" James grinned arrogantly. She scowled deeply and brushed past him. "Are you going back to the common room, Evans?" James asked conversationally, falling into step beside her.
"Yes." Lily ground out past gritted teeth. James smiled; how he loved irritating her.
"So, Evans did you notice that Gryffindor's back in the lead?"
"No thanks to you." She snapped
"Did you enjoy Peeves little visit in Transfiguration?"
"It wouldn't surprise me if you had got him to come in on purpose, I saw you grinning at Black about it." James smiled, if only she knew how close she was to the truth,
"So you were staring at me were you?" Lily blanched
"WHAT?"
"Well, I know you find me devilishly handsome, but taking advantage of me and looking at me with a wet shirt on is not very feminine, Evans dear." Lily appeared too shocked to speak; she opened her mouth a few times and then shut it again,
"I think I'm going to be scarred for life," she said in a small voice, and with that she ran off, cheeks still unnaturally pale. James frowned after her,
"I'm not that bad looking am I?" he muttered before he forgot about Lily entirely. He had more important things to think about, like Quidditch trials. He grinned wildly and then continued to head up to Gryffindor common room, he couldn't wait to tell Sirius.
"A friend in power is a friend lost" - Henry Adams
James ambled happily into the common room and immediately broke off to sit by Sirius, Remus and Peter, who were apparently arguing about why McGonagall had kept him behind,
"I still think it was because of the impersonations -"
"It can't have been Peter else you would have been kept behind as well -"
"Exactly Remus that is why the real reason is that he is having an illicit and steamy affair with McGonagall -"
"So that's why my marks are so high." James hit his head in an imitation of enlightenment and his friends whirled around quickly, Sirius even had the grace to look a little sheepish about his 'idea'. He soon forgot the expression however and turned eagerly to James,
"So why did Professor McG keep you behind?" James raised an eyebrow at "McG" but didn't comment,
"I can't tell you, I've been scarred for life by the affair comment." James grinned, Evans was useful for something then, that 'scarred for life' line was quite good. Sirius fell to the floor and wrapped his arms around James' knees.
"Please, Jamesie, please, please, please tell us, I'm sorry." He then proceeded to pretend to cry into James robes,
"Interesting," murmured Remus, putting on his teacher's voice, "the subject has reverted to childhood in order to escape the blame." James snorted and Sirius sat up indignantly,
"That's it, Remus Lupin you are not coming to my party." James began to laugh and Peter soon joined in, pretty quickly all were in hysterics and Sirius nobly fought to keep his face straight, he was now crying "muuummyyyyyy, they're laughing at meee muuuuummyyyyyy!" at the top of his voice, receiving several amused looks from the other people in the common room. Finally, Sirius ran out of childish comments and so he merely looked coolly at his friends, still laughing on the floor, and said "You guys are so childish sometimes." The hypocrisy of the statement set James, Remus and Peter off again and it took quite a while until they we're all seated and straight faced once more,
Finally Remus spoke up, "So James, why did Professor McGonagall keep you behind?"
"You know a little game called Quidditch," his friends rolled their eyes, James talked of little else, "They made me captain!" He grinned infectiously,
"That's great!" Peter shouted as Remus slapped James on the back, James stiffened slightly but kept smiling, Sirius pretended to look mournfully at the floor,
"What's up Sirius?" Peter asked curiously,
"We've lost them Pete." The three raised their eyebrows at each other
"They say 'a friend in power is a friend lost' and we have TWO friends in power. They have to obey the rules, have extra duties, half of the Marauders have gone, left us behind. We'll have to keep up the flag on our own Pete, are we up to the job?"
"Don't be ridiculous, just think, with Remus' and mine's privileges we'll know for definite every single passage in the castle." Sirius smiled at the thought,
"So…when are you holding Quidditch tryouts?"
"I was thinking this Saturday."
"Can't." Peter said mournfully,
"Why not?"
"We have detention, remember?"
"Oh, I was let off." James looked at his friends expressions of shock, "I guess McGonagall really wants to win the Quidditch cup. So how about Friday then?"
"Nope," said Sirius cheerfully, quite enjoying the angry look on James face and the testy,
"why not?"
"We have to add more to the potion, I reckon it'll be finished by the end of term if we add the boomslang skin on Friday." James nodded in agreement, they wouldn't let Remus down.
"Sunday?"
"Full moon." Remus said in a monotone, the four were silent for a moment, they had never done anything on a full moon since they had discovered about Remus' condition in second year, they didn't want Remus to think he was being left out,
"So, Thursday it is then." James looked around, expecting some problem to arise,
"Thursday's good." Said Sirius chirpily,
"Can't think of anything happening on Thursday." Mumbled Remus,
"I've always liked Thursdays." Added Peter, he then frowned when his friends looked at him incredulously, "What? I was born on a Thursday."
James shook his head, "So I was thinking that I should get all the team together and then we can decide, make sure they fit with the whole team."
"Good idea." Remus said sagely, "What positions do you need?" A look of concentration appeared on James' face,
"We have two chasers, me and Frank Longbottom, so we'll need another one. Tristan Meadows is Keeper, Helena Wan is beater but we still need another one, so…" James counted on his fingers, "We need a chaser, a beater and a seeker." He leaned his head back,
"That shouldn't be too hard." Remus said encouragingly but James didn't lift his head, 'hard?" he thought, 'getting three halfway decent people on the team would be nearly impossible.'
"On the way back, they sang a number of tuneful and reflective songs on the subjects of peace, justice, morality, culture, sport, family life, and the obliteration of all other life forms." -Douglas Adams
Lily came down from the Girls' dormitory the following day and was shocked to see a crowd of people standing around the notice board, chatting excitedly. She looked over at Parisa with raised eyebrows "What's going on?" Parisa shrugged and so Lily headed over to Artis, hoping that she would know more.
Artis shrieked when she saw Lily and Parisa, her curly blonde hair streamed out behind her as she ran over excitedly, "What's going on?" Parisa asked curiously,
"James Potter has been made Quidditch captain," Lily looked at Parisa, she didn't seem surprised,
"And?" she asked coolly,
"Quidditch tryouts are Thursday." This was exciting, Lily's green eyes flashed with pleasure, this year the position was finally open and she was going to try out for seeker.
"Here's your chance Lils!" Parisa said excitedly, Lily grinned brightly for a moment before her face fell, "What's wrong?"
"Potter's captain. There's no way he'll let me be on his team." She said sadly, regretting for the first time that she appeared to be the only one in the school, except for the Slytherins of course, who wasn't in Potter's fan club.
"Don't worry Lils, it's a team decision, and whatever you think of Potter he's passionate about Quidditch, he won't compromise the team for the sake of personal opinion, if you're the best you'll be on the team." Lily frowned, everything she knew about Potter pointed to the fact that he was far from fair – why else would he go around hexing people? But who knew, maybe Parisa would be right? Potter was a definitely mad about Quidditch.
Artis and Parisa looked worriedly at her, "You're still going to try out right?"
"Yes, I'll try out. Damn Potter, I'll show him and be the best there is!"
"I would say that's the spirit, but, you really should be playing for the love of the game." Parisa said dryly,
"Oh, I'll play for that too." Lily said absentmindedly, still imagining the time when Potter would have to admit that she was good at something, and she was good at Quidditch. "Are you two coming to breakfast?" She set out towards the Great Hall and Artis and Parisa hurried after her, sending each other sideways looks.