He really, really didn't want to talk about Shelby with anyone, mainly because he had no idea what to say about her. The sex was amazing, her smile drove him crazy and he found himself getting more and more addicted to her every time he was around her.
When he finally made it home later that night he was desperately in need of relaxation. He contemplated going to O'Maley's but really didn't feel like being around people. So he opted for a beer and his comfortable couch. He changed into an undershirt and tearaways. He had just kicked his feet up when the doorbell rang.
Shelby shifted from one foot to the other. What was she doing here? The fact that she had actually called Aiden for Danny's address was bad enough, why did she have to go there?
The stunned look on his face reiterated her fear so she backed up, "I'm sorry, I probably should have called first." She'd never seen him dressed so casually before. She really liked it.
He recovered quickly, "And miss the look on my face? No you shouldn't have." He gave her that smirk she craved and licked his lips.
She wanted to say something witty, maybe engage him in conversation like that night at the diner, but she could think of nothing. All she could do was snake her arms around his waist and kick the door shut with her foot, "Please don't ask me why I'm here."
He looked down at her, "Okay." He said hoarsely. He really didn't care why she was there, it was better than what he had planned.
Her lips found his and she got lost. Three days, she hadn't been around him in three days and she'd turned into a raving lunatic. He pulled her legs up around his waist and backed up to sit down on his couch. She was intoxicating him to the point that he would never find his room.
She anchored herself around his hips and pulled her mouth away, "You're like a habit I don't want to break."
"So don't." He said against her mouth pulling her closer to him again.
They took their time that night, working their way through his apartment and finally into the bedroom.
After it was over and they'd lain there a while, she tried to move out of his arms but he stopped her. "Where are you going?" He asked softly near the base of her neck.
She closed her eyes and licked her lips, "Following your lead." She said, referring to his leaving her bed the last time.
He chuckled against her skin, "Unless I'm going undercover tomorrow and nobody told me, you can't use that excuse."
She turned so she was facing him, "You mean that really was the reason?"
Smiling at her lazily with his eyes half closed he squeezed her tightly around the waist. "I came to you that night remember? If I was into leaving you without reason I would have done it the first night."
"Good point." She turned around and let him settle into the curves of her body again.
"Yeah I know," He placed a kiss on her shoulder, "I'm full of them."
She lay there in his arms listening to him breathe. She was more comfortable than she had ever been before and it scared her. What did she do when she was scared? She ran. The difference this time was that she didn't want to dive into another pair of arms and she could vividly picture the look on Danny's face when she finally let him go.
It haunted her and it hadn't even happened yet. However the alternative wasn't an option, it couldn't be.
She suppressed a sigh and tried to relax, but it was too late.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"What makes you think something's wrong?" she asked back.
"You're tense. That usually means you're either crying and trying not to or you have to tell me something that you don't think I'll want to hear."
"What? You an expert on body language now?"
"I'm a CSI, remember?"
She rolled on to her back and stared at the ceiling. "I just don't know what to make of…this. Why I keep coming back, why I can't just walk away."
"You want to walk away?" he asked, hoping the answer would be no.
She turned her head to look at him. "No. But I feel like I should."
"Why?"
"I just…this was supposed to just be another game. I can't for the life of me figure out when the game stopped."
"If it makes you feel any better, I've been wondering the same thing."
She frowned. "Actually, that makes me feel worse."
He furrowed his brow at her. "Why worse?"
"Because you can't make the decision for me."
"I see." He propped himself up on his elbow so he could look at her better. "I don't know, Shelby. What do you want?"
She sighed. "I want to avoid talking about this."
"How much longer do you figure we can avoid it?"
She shrugged. "I'm already having trouble. Another night like this and I might implode."
"Hmm. That would be unfortunate."
"I haven't been in an honest-to-god relationship in five years."
"Since Don."
"Yeah, since Don. I don't think I'm very good at them."
"Are you sure you're picking the right benchmark?"
"Hell if I know. All I know is that I'm a really good NARC. Everything else is up in the air as far as I'm concerned."
"I think you're a pretty good person."
She scoffed. "You hardly know me."
He scoffed back. "I've paid more attention to you than you think, you know."
She smiled sadly. "I'm just – I'm so used to being lonely. Part of me likes that emptiness I feel every time you leave. It's familiar somehow."
"I'm not asking you to marry me."
"No? And what is it that you want, Danny?" she asked.
He scratched the back of his neck and licked his lips. "I dunno, I just want to be with you, I guess. However that pans out doesn't matter one way or the other to me."
"You are way too easy going."
"That's a bad thing?"
She sat up so she could look at him better. "No. It's just strange to me, that's all. Don was always so – possessive. I felt like I couldn't do anything without checking with him first."
"Is that why you cheated on him?"
Shelby started. She hadn't expected that. "How did you know I cheated on him?"
Danny just shrugged. "Doesn't take a genius. I know Don pretty well and you'd have to hurt him pretty bad for him to react to you the way he does. And when he warned me off you, I knew for sure."
"And it doesn't bother you?"
"Nah. You don't cage a wild bird. Just doesn't work. My mom was a lot like you – a real free-spirit. You just sort of had to learn to let her be."
"Stop it."
"Stop what?"
"Telling me everything I want to hear."
Danny sat up and pulled her into his arms. "Look, Shelby, I really like you. But this whole 'thing' – whatever it is – is totally up to you. I mean, if you want to walk away, I won't like it, but I'll let you. And if you want to stay, that's cool too."
She kissed him, soft and deep. "Let me think about it," she said onto his mouth.
He just nodded and kissed her again.