Chapter 3

Disclaimer- I do not own The O.C.

A/N-Thank you so much to everyone who has been reading and reviewing this story. They really do brighten my entire day. This is the 3rd chapter, and if you guys enjoy it, the longer, heavier 4th chapter will be up very shortly.

An hour later, Marissa lay alone on her bed, her sullen eyes staring endlessly at the high ceiling above. A paperback copy of Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting sat next to her, folded over on the second page. Summer had given it to her in an attempt to pass on her own emotional enlightenment. But Marissa's entire body was vibrating slowly, weak energy consuming her every breath. She closed her eyes, trying to brush the memories out of her mind. But all she could think of were the times when she was with him. Before she had sacrificed her entire world to keep him alive. Marissa turned over on her side and stared at the top drawer of her nightstand. She lifted her hand from the bed, and paused as it hovered over the handle. Grasping on to it, she pulled the drawer opened to reveal a bottle of clear vodka, lying innocently amongst nail files and lipstick tubes. She hesitated, and then lifted it out, feeling its smooth body against her worn fingers. It had been a long time since she felt the need to drink away any of her pain. Now, there was too much for her to stand. She stroked the cap with her thumb, lightly tracing the familiar circular pattern, and twisted it off, letting it fall to the bed. Her mind contemplated the possibilities of what could happen if she let the liquid douse her throat.

A knock came from the door, waking Marissa from her deep thoughts.

"One second…" she said hurriedly, grazing her hand over the bed to find the cap and tightening it over the mouth of the bottle. She shoved it back inside the drawer and closed it quickly, rushing over to the entrance of her bedroom.

"Ryan…"

"I hope I'm not…interrupting anything."

"No, no. Come in."

Ryan walked into the room, his sweeping breath apparent to her. She closed the door and barely had her hand off the knob when he spoke.

"I can't do this anymore."

"What?"

"I can't…I…there's always something coming between us Marissa. Luke, Oliver, now Trey…I just-"

Marissa stood weakly in front of him, disbelief covering her face.

"So the fact that you might have gotten another girl pregnant and left for the summer accounts for nothing…"

Ryan paused, trying to process his words.

"Marissa…"

"Get out."

The latent tears dripped down her face, her lips quivering as the salty taste began to settle. She thrust the door open, and waited for him to leave.

"I'm sorry…"

"Like hell you are."

She blasted anger through her sobs, because it was easier than showing him her sadness. But after the words escaped her mouth, she felt herself becoming weaker, the depression sneaking into her throat.

"Please…" her voice cracked softly.

Ryan turned around helplessly and walked outside her room. She closed the door behind him, leaning against its unforgiving wooden texture. The hysterical symphony drained from inside of her. He was standing in the hallway, taking in her drowning anguish. It became unbearable, and slowly, he began to walk away. Marissa heard the footsteps echo down the hallway. She ran back to the drawer of her nightstand, thrusting it open and snatching the bottle of liquor in her trembling hand. This time, she didn't bother to think. It raced down her throat, stinging away the pain of having lost the most important part of her life.

It was a quarter to seven when her eyelids blinked open, her head heavy with sleep. The effects of the alcohol had worn off, and she was completely sobered, but also completely hung over. And she was supposed to be at the Cohen's in fifteen minutes.

"Great," Marissa thought. She was feeling absolutely miserable, and now not only did she have to relive the case once again, she had to face Ryan. After drawing her blinds, Marissa opened her bedroom window and felt the cool air send chills through her skin. She walked over to her closet and grabbed a pink jacket, pulling it over the soft lacey dress that she had changed into hours before. Her reflection was less forgiving than usual, with dark circles shadowing the corners of her eyes. Marissa opened the dresser drawer, rummaging through it for a concealer wand. She finally found one, and blended the thin consistency underneath her eyes. After applying mascara onto her long lashes, Marissa grabbed a purse and looked around for anything she might need to bring with her. She eyed the nightstand hesitantly, and opened up its top drawer, pulling out her renewed escape.

Sandy opened the front door, revealing a flawlessly stunning Marissa. She smiled through her hidden agony and stepped inside, walking into the kitchen. The first person she noticed was Ryan, who seemed to be awe-struck by her beauty. His eyes were fixed on her, but she turned away, facing down as she made her way to the table. Ryan looked back at her as she sat down uncomfortably and continued to avoid his stare.

Across from Ryan was Seth and Summer, leaning into the corner of the marble counters. Now that everyone had congregated in one area, Sandy ushered them to join Marissa at the table. Ryan was about to sit down next to her, but the apparent uneasiness in her avoiding eyes changed his mind.

For the next thirty minutes, Sandy spoke to them about the logistics of her case, coating it with a matter-of-fact tone. He shuffled through papers, reciting obscure laws that meant nothing to any of them. By the time he was finished, Summer asked what the other three had been wondering.

"Mr. Cohen…what's gonna happen to her?"

Sandy paused.

"As of now, I think I can get her off with involuntary man-slaughter. Possibly even nothing."

"That's wonderful!" Summer exclaimed.

"Though we can never be too sure with these things. I've still got a lot of work to do."

"Thank you…for everything."

Marissa spoke earnestly, and a sympathetic Sandy responded as well as he could.

"You know I'm happy to help. I'll do whatever I can."

His words seemed somewhat disheartening to everyone at the table. What if everything he could do wasn't good enough? They all worried of her fate, intent on keeping a positive outlook.

"For now, why don't we eat? I don't know about you, but I'm starved."

"That's a good idea," Seth agreed. He stood up and walked over to the telephone, dialing the number of the Thai restaurant.

"Summer, Marissa, you're welcome to join us…"

"Oh, no, that's okay…" Marissa softly began to protest. "I promised my parents I'd eat with them.

The three others at the table looked at her with intent interest.

"Woah, Coop…parents? As in plural?"

"Yeah, my dad…well…he's back."

"He is?" Sandy joined Summer in questioning her about the new revelation.

Marissa smiled slightly.

"Wow, you really do miss a lot without Kirsten here."

"Well…anyway, I gotta go, I told them I'd be back by nine. Thanks again."

Ryan's gaze followed Marissa as she disappeared from the kitchen. They heard the front door close, and he was bombarded by three questioning faces.

"What?"

"Is it just me?" Seth started. "Or did you two not say a word to each other that entire time?"

"I told you," Ryan said defensively. "It's weird."

"Well are you still a couple?" Sandy pried.

Aggravated, Ryan got up and took a cup out of the cabinet. He muttered, "no," and continued over to the refrigerator to pour himself a glass of soda. However, the news couldn't shake the attention of the other three.

"Wait man…" Seth pressed on. "I thought that this afternoon you two were still together…"

"Yeah well, now we're not."

Ryan's sharp tone finally resonated with them, and they stopped questioning him about his situation with Marissa. He sat back down at the table, and besides a few sarcastic comments by Seth, they waited for their food in silence.

A/N- Sorry to leave you guys there. But if I hadn't broken it up the next chapter would have dragged on forever. Please R/R and the next one will be up really soon!