An intrusive, damming, frustrating knock made Saleairy drop her face to the side of Carth's, her lips resting against his shoulder. They both groaned at the interruption that was a near physical pain since the intense emotional bond that took them so far away was shattered. Carth slid her off, getting up to answer the knock and she rolled to her back, sighing with a listless resignation.

"If it's HK feel free to shut him down." She called.

"Hello Carth. I have something to discuss with whoever made our rooming arrangements." Bastila was getting huffy and Saleairy knew the tone. She also knew it was at its zenith when she spoke with Carth or Canderous.

"I didn't make the rooming arrangements." Carth said.

"Well it's obvious you were the recipient of some consideration. Why is she sleeping on the floor? Don't Republic officers have any consideration-"

"Whoa, easy there. What's wrong with your rooming situation?" Carth tried to halt the over protective Jedi women whenever he could and between Bastila and Juhani he was always being cautious and placating.

"HK has decided to stay in my room and harass me to go on some search of his for T3 and I just got back from a very tiring Council visit."

"Dear, he's your droid. Any suggestions?" Carth called as they both looked at where Saleairy stretched out on the floor. Judging by their palpable stares, she must've looked as drained and languid as she felt.

"Tell him if he's a good droid I'll make sure he has a suitable reward. Whatever that reward is, you can stretch it to however long you need to sleep."

"Thank you but if there is any further trouble-"

"Shut him down. It would do his circuits good." Carth said.

"It's good to see you back safely Bastila." Saleairy called as Carth ushered Bastila out and locked the door. Carth sighed.

"That was certainly anticlimactic." Carth said.

"I'm sorry." She laughed as she rubbed her eyes. When she opened her eyes again, Carth was beside her on the floor, yawning.

"Is it just me, or did that feel like it took a lot of energy?"

"The self control to answer to door took considerable strength." She smiled.

"Would you rather have Bastila bring the door down?" Carth asked.

"I know you're right."

"But still, now we're both drowsy and-" He yawned mid sentence and Saleairy touched his mouth to stop the pending tail end of the phrase. He was stilled under her touch and she smiled. She took her hand away and laughed. "What's so funny?"

"I still have such an affect on you. Every time I touch you, you freeze up and wait to see how you should react." She giggled. "However adolescent, it's very cute." He collapsed from his semi sitting position.

"My dear, you are too sweet."

"Should we get in the bed to sleep?" She asked. She would've slept where she fell.

"It would only seem natural. Did you want me to sleep on the couch?"

"You'd have more room on the bed."

"Okay." He got up and helped her to her feet. She walked to the picture windows and watched the sun rise. Carth stood behind her and she slid into his arms, resting her face on his chest. She used her powers to draw the shades that blocked all the light out. She went to get a hair band and tied her hair back. When she came back out Carth was in the middle of the bed, minus a pajama top. She smiled.

"When I said you'd have more room on the bed I didn't think you'd be in the middle of it. I always thought you solders slept in the nude." She sat on the arm of the couch.

"I'm still wearing pants. Hey, why are you on the couch?" He was confused and she chuckled.

"To mess with you."

"Don't toy with me like that." He blinked and pleaded.

"I wouldn't dream of it." She put the robe on the chair over his shirt and slid in beside him.

"Oh, the over head lighting is still on-" Saleairy used her powers to turn the light switch off and Carth smiled in the near darkness. "I forgot how convenient you Jedi are."

"Convenience is one thing and covert operations are another." He felt her fingers around his waist and he didn't resist until he realized she was getting into a better tickling position. He caught her around her waist and pulled her up until her head rested on his chest. She yawned. "You're no fun."

"I'm calling a ceasefire until we wake up."

"Okay."

"I want a guarantee." She kissed his collarbone and let him wrap his arm around her.

When Saleairy woke up it felt as if she'd slept for days in a coma but she'd only been unconscious for an hour. She resettled against Carth's chest and he stirred.

"Go back to sleep. It's only been an hour." She said. He ran his hand through her hair and kissed the top of her head in his half awake stupor. She smiled and thought about kissing him just to see if he would wake up or assume it was a dream. She resisted the temptation and shut her eyes. She wondered if she would ever deserve Carth or the companions she loved. Did she deserve to keep them? She didn't know. Carth blinked at her.

"I can tell you're thinking. Stop it." She smiled and snuggled closer. Carth would always remind her of the water in the Temple now and she didn't mind because when she went to the Temple to face the Masters she'd betrayed, she would walk with Carth surrounding her even if he wasn't allowed to be with her.

She dreamt of walking down the corridors of the enclave on Dantooine. It was not a normal dream; it was intrusive and at times too light or too dark, making it too difficult to see.

Dantooine was razed by the Sith forces. Why was she there? It was no more. Few people survived and the halls no longer held peace; they held blood and shadows of brutality. She walked into the Council's chamber alone and the doors slammed shut behind her. The Masters did not seem happy with her. Why wouldn't they be pleased? She'd done her task and helped her fellow Jedi pass on to become one with the force by defeating Malak. Why was she here?

"Revan, we no longer want you to be a Jedi. If you did not have another identity you would surely be banished." They weren't looking at her. A black shadow stood beside her.

"Saleairy, we wish to strike Revan from you forever."

"But Revan isn't in me." Carth had told her he could never love Revan and she knew Revan was dead. Revan had to be dead. The shadow next to her sulked around the room, stopping next to her and clinging to her arm without a tangible touch. Just a shadow on her, asking her for help.

"She is. What she does still stains you because you feel guilt and condemnation for it." The Masters came closer. The shadow was struggling in the midst of so many Jedi and it crawled through Saleairy.

"How could you strike her from me? She does not exist in me. I am Saleairy." The shadow disappeared and the strange heaviness it caused in Saleairy disappeared.

"Yes, you are Saleairy Cheran but the fear and anger of Revan is in you and if you let it entangle you, she will come back." The shadow was there. The shadow was the remainder of Revan, anger, fear and it was no longer there. Why were they doing this?

"What are you going to do?" She couldn't argue with the Council.

"Strike her from you."

"Take her memories."

"Take her emotions."

"Take her."

"Won't that hurt me?" Saleairy asked.

"Perhaps, but we would not accept you another way."

"You can't-" The force flooded around her and she screamed. She remembered something. Revan was never afraid of what the force could do to her. That was why the Council was able to take her memories. She didn't expect the force could twist her any further. She wasn't afraid. Saleairy was terrified of the Masters that stood around her because of what they could do. They could take her memories again to cleanse her. Cleanse her of light, emotion and the memories of the people she loved. It mattered more now because she was good; she didn't deserve her companions but she didn't deserve yet another aching void.

"We will not harm you Padawan. We will not touch you in exchange for one thing." She trembled.

"What?"

"You must fully join the Order. Submit to our decisions, leave your companions and forever abandon what you call love. We will not harm your memory or identity but you will remember always what you cannot have."