Post Jump, Push Fall
How had life gotten so screwed up in so little time? Garret was gone for starters. She prayed with all her might that he would return. But then, there was Woody…
Why did he have to get shot? Why did he hate her now? But most of all, why couldn't someone shoot her, too? The pain of being thrown out and given up on was something unimaginable. He had asked her to leave and she did. An order from a detective to an ME, she'd never accept. However, his wishes, she couldn't refuse.
Jordan sat in the waiting room, having just cried a year's worth of tears. As she reached to turn off her c.d. player and wipe her eyes, a nurse appeared in the doorway.
"You can go in if you'd like," the nurse offered before leaving. Jordan thanked her and put her headphones around her neck. She walked into room 201 and found Woody lying asleep in his bed. The anesthesia was still wearing off. She positioned herself on the chair and let her eyes droop closed as she restarted her music.
"Jordan?" She plucked the headphones off to see Woody staring at her.
"Hey, um… I've only been in her a few seconds. They just let me come in. Surgery worked. You should heal up fine."
"Good. What are you doing here and what are you listening to?" he asked shortly but as casually as possible, considering his pain.
"Oh, umm… well, I've been here all day for your surgery and, uh… just some music."
"Hmm. How 'bout giving it over? I haven't been able to hear music since…"
"Uh… yeah, sure," she ceded, handing it over. He slipped the phones on his ears.
After all the starts and stops…We keep coming back to these two hearts…"Nice," he said staring at the monitor instead of her. "You, uh… you mind if I hold onto it," he said pressing stop. "Music could help pass the time in here," he explained.
"Oh. Sure, can I just have one last song for a sec?" Woody handed it back to her and watched as she pressed start and jumped ahead five songs. She nodded in time to the music briefly, her eyes sliding closed. Wincing, she took off the phones, stopped the song, mumbled good-bye and left, wiping at her eyes. Woody took the machine and went to song five.
If I should stay…I'll only be in the way…So I'll go…But I know…I'll think of you every step of the way…And I will always love you…I will always love yooou…
Woody smiled that she should listen to this song. His curiosity peeked and he listened to snippets of the other songs.
After all the stops and starts… He skipped the rest of the track to hear the next.
Only you…Can make all this world seem right…Only you…Can make the darkness bright…
How do I…Get through one night without you?…If I had to live without you…What kind of life would that be?
Ooh, my love…My darling…I've hungered for your touch…Alone…
If I should stay…I'll only be in the way…
It must have been love…But it's over now…It must have been good…But I lost it somehow…
I wanna stand with you on a mountain…I wanna bathe with you in the sea…
Regressa a mi…quiereme otra vez…(Return to me…Love me one more time…)
Hold me…Hold me…Never let me go until you've told me…Told me…What I want to know and then just hold me…Hold me…Make me tell you I'm in love with you…
There will come a day…Somewhere far away…In your arms I'll stay…My only love…You've reached the deepest part…Of the secret in my heart…I've known it from the start…My only love…My only love…
Yes, I'm ready to fall in love tonight…Ready to hold my heart open wide…I can't promise forever, but baby I'll try…Yes, I'm ready to fall…In love tonight…
I never lived before your love…I never felt before your touch…I never needed anyone to make me feel alive…But then again, I wasn't really living…I never lived before your love…
You were my strength when I was weak…You were my voice when I couldn't speak…You were my eyes when I couldn't see…You saw the best there was in me…Lifted me up when I couldn't reach…You gave me faith cause you believed…I'm everything I am because you loved me…
If you're not the one, then my does my soul feel glad today?…If you're not the one, then my does my hand fit yours this way?…If you are not mine, then why does your heart return my call?…If you are not mine, would I have the strength to stand at all?…
You raise me up…So I can stand on mountains…You raise me up…To walk on stormy seas…I am strong…When I am on your shoulders…You raise me up…To more than I can be…
There for me…Every time I've been away…Will you be there for me?…Thinking of me ev'ry day…Are you my destiny?…Words I never dared to say…Will you be there for me?…
I'll make a wish for you…And hope it will come true…That life would just be kind…To such a gentle mind…And if you lose your way…Think back to yesterday…Remember me this way…Ooooh, remember me this way…
Wherever you go…Whatever you do…I will be right here waiting for you…Whatever it takes…Or how my heart breaks…I will be right here waiting for you…
Woody slipped the headphones off his ears and hung his head a little bit. The songs had virtually moved him to tears, he realized as he dabbed at his cheeks with one of his hands. He bit his lower lip and thought about all the songs. He came to light on The one she'd asked to listen to again. So, I'll go, but I know… Something stuck. So, I'll go, but…
Woody sat up quickly… a little too quickly for his current state. His head throbbed violently. He let himself lean back gently against the pillows and brought ha hand to his forehead.
"Hey, Woody!" Garret called from the door. Woody looked towards him, then looked back up. He was glad to see Garret, but he had something on his mind right now.
"Listen, Garret," he said, but then, rather than ask him to leave, he beckoned him closer. "Listen, Garret, how has Jordan been handling all this?" he asked, listening very closely.
"Well, she's handled stuff better. For a while, Nigel said she'd mope around in her office, doing paperwork. Apparently, when you'd knock, she wouldn't answer and you'd walk in to find her with a c.d. player and a set of headphones on." Woody looked subtly to his nightstand where said player now rested. "Now, she's taken a leave of absence. She'd been here since she started it Monday. I'll walk in and find her, head down, crying or totally asleep. I'd say that she's hurt," Garret surmised, looking accusingly at Woody.
"What? What'd I do?" he asked, looking as bewildered as humanly possible.
"Well, I spoke with her and she's positive that you hate her guts," Garret said. He didn't sugarcoat anything. It was there, black and white for Woody.
"Why the hell would she think that?" Woody asked, outraged.
"I asked her that myself. When you were brought in, you apparently told her to 'Get out. Now,' or something to those effects. She figured she'd lost you. Until you told her to get out, she was handling it fairly well. She was collected, ready to get the facts, then take it from there. After you dismissed her, she started moping around, not bothering to investigate. She just ran paperwork and listened to her discman." Garret crossed his arms and stared down at Woody with a 'What-are-you-gonna-do-now?' look.
"Ok, thanks a mil, Garret. I don't mean to be rude, but I need you to leave m for a while. I need to do something," he said, sitting up slowly and reaching for his call button. Garret turned to leave as the nurse walked into his room. She started to fuss over the machinery, but he stopped her.
"Listen, um… I need you to do a kind of strange favor for me…"
Riiiing, riiiing!
Jordan turned down the music, which was, in fact, another copy of the exact same disc. Tossing a shirt she was packing into the duffle bag and wiping her eyes, she picked up the receiver.
"Jordan Cavanaugh. Hello?" she said, as perkily as possible.
"Dr. Cavanaugh, you're name is on a patient's clipboard as emergency contact. Um, a Detective Woodrow Wilson Hoyt? We need you here immediately. His vitals are starting to give up a bit. You should come quickly." Jordan slammed the receiver down… hard! She ran to the door, grabbing her coat and flying out the door, only locking one lock.
She sprinted out to her car and jammed the key in the ignition, thanking everything that it started immediately. Turning out of the parking lot and onto the road, she took all the small back roads and got there in about 10 minutes. She pulled the keys out and ran inside, heading straight for the stairs and hiking the flight two at a time.
Jordan almost skidded out of the stairwell with her heels, but didn't even take a second to regain her breath before going straight for his room. She ran in and finally stopped running when she was by his side. Woody cracked open one eye, then the other and blinked a few times.
"Jordan, you came," he whispered softly. She nodded as she sat by his side on the small cot. "Here, your discman. I at least got to sample all the songs. They're beautiful." He smiled lightly as he say her blush crimson. "Jordan, I know your music. This isn't it. Why the change?" he asked as innocently as possible.
"With you in here and my feeling like I was, I didn't' have the heart to listen to it. This was what I needed for my mind," she said, obviously choosing her words carefully.
"Jordan, Garret came by earlier. I asked him how you were holding up. From what he's heard, the answer is not too well. Did you actually stop working the field and start pushing paper?" She nodded. "All you do at work is write reports and listen to this disc?" She nodded again. "What's wrong? Why have you lost all hope? And don't give me some story. I want the truth, Jordan. You owe me that much."
"Because I lost you…" she whispered almost inaudibly.
"Jordan, I have a confession. I'm fine." Her head snapped up and she stared blankly at him. "I knew you were packing to leave soon, too," he added.
"How?"
"I listened to the disc's songs. I counted back. The last song you listened to before you left was 'I Will Always Love You' and you only listened to the first ten seconds. It was the one line…So, I'll go…" he admitted. "I knew you were leaving and I knew why you were crying. Then, Garret told me you took a leave of absence. I pieced it together." She sat still and hung her head before she walked over to the window and looked outside.
"Jordan, Garret said you were here almost the entire time. Why didn't you come in?"
"Because you hate me," she whispered. Again, Woody heard her though she thought he didn't.
"Jordan, come here and stand beside me, please." She walked over to his bedside. He signaled her to bend down lower to him and she did. Swiftly, he slid his hand behind her neck and pulled her lips to his own, sealing the moment with a tender kiss. "Listen to me," he said when they parted. "I will never, never hate you, Jordan Cavanaugh. Ever… If you believe that I hate you, then you should go home, finish packing and leave on the next flight to wherever the hell you want to go. I love you. Do you hear me, Jordan? I would give anything to make sure your happy. Do you get it? If it made you happy, I would unhook every one of these machines and let go. Do you understand what I'm saying here?" he asked her, wiping the forming tears from her eyes.
"I understand, because I feel the same. I love you, Woods," she said teary-eyed. Woody hugged her close and stroked her hair gently. "C'mon, in," he said. "You're going to get a good night's sleep for the first time." He pulled Jordan into the bed with him, placing himself with his arm over her waist. Together, they fell asleep, oblivious to when Garret, Nigel, Bug and Lily turned up to visit. They were together. That was all that mattered.