Eek...here I go for hopefully the last of many tries to write this God
forsaken chapter... Thanks goes to my darling *insert unmentionable here* for
my daily injection of happy. You're amazing and I love you!
*Ahem* Sorry for my stupid lateness. This stupid chapter will be stupidly completed tonight! I am stupidly determined!
Happy 20th chapter to all! Yaaay!
***
Amanda seemed to find solace in the fact that she now seemed to have Sirius totally benquoined to her, and was crying much less throughout the day. She'd opted not to attend her cousin's funeral, as it coincided terribly with the last Hogsmeade weekend before Christmas.
James and Sirius hardly spent any time together that week, as they were both rather preoccupied with their newfound companions. They shared only quick, heavy-eyed conversations at the breakfast table and short sentences between classes.
By Friday, Renee and Chloe were rather worried about James and Sirius and Amanda and Lily. They didn't seem to even acknowledge each other. Lily was never seen anywhere without James, and Amanda never left Sirius' side. At first it was cute that they were all so in love, but now it was just nauseating.
On Saturday morning, Renee and Chloe ran down to the kitchens early and packed three picnic baskets with scrummy winter foods then went to find their friends. They were going to have a big group picnic lunch, and lovey- dovey behaviour was strictly forbidden.
It was between the hours of nine and ten that the foursome made their individual ways out of their rooms. Renee and Chloe were anxiously awaiting their awakening, chatting at a table on which the picnic baskets were stacked.
When finally Sirius emerged with puffy eyes and his ever-scruffy hair, Renee and Chloe dragged them outside despite their complaining; baskets levitating happily behind them.
"What is wrong with you? It's winter and it's freezing...I'm not going out there to picnic with you, I wont." Stated a grumpy Amanda. Lily and James however were giggling together as they meandered along with the group, looking very cosy indeed.
Renee turned to answer Amanda, but faulted at once on seeing James and Lily. "Hey you two! Cut it out, there will be none of that today. This is a purely platonic outing which will be suitable for the eyes and minds of children under five, and would not cause those children to ask questions of their squicky parents, do you understand?" Lily immediately dropped James' hand and started fidgeting nervously with her head bowed. James however gave an indignant grunt, but rather terrified by Renee's expression, took a step away from Lily.
Sirius who had been straggling behind the group until now, sped up and was goggling at Renee and Chloe as if they were insane. "Do you mean to tell me, that you are taking us outside in the freezing subzero weather while it's snowing, to sit around like good little pancake children who abide happily by the ten centimetre rule?" He asked incredulously.
Chloe gave him a cheeky smile. "We brought poptarts. Every flavour." She said simply.
Sirius' expression changed completely into one of joy. "Well, I'm sold." He said with a businessmanlike air and sped up to lead the group.
***
Meanwhile at the breakfast table, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew were catching up over some marmalade soup jelly pie. Peter was concerned (in an evil, rattish way of course) about Remus' withdrawn behaviour lately. He also was silently wanting to know why he had been spotted fraternising with Snape on more than one occasion.
"You were so close to James and Sirius though. Surely it's nothing that can't be worked out?" Said Peter fairly.
"Oh well I'm sure it can be worked out...You see, I don't even know why James hates me. Sirius has no reason to, although I haven't spoken to him properly in quite a while. No, I think this is nothing more than a fault of a couple of insane teenagers somewhere in Australia writing me badly. I mean, everyone knows I'm not evil. But I understand these girls woes...with the absence of super-sexy-evil Draco Malfoy, and Severus being so pathetic and cute, they are rather short of a villain. I, being the kind soul I am, am more than happy to be of service." Said Remus with a rather vacant smile.
"Oh..." said Peter. Rather frightened. In an attempt to hide his terror and slight concern for Remus' sanity, he turned to the person next to him and started gnawing on their shoulder.
Remus, who wasn't disconcerted by this at all, smiled cheerfully and slapped Peter gently on the back before getting up. "Well if you'll excuse me Peter, you look rather occupied, and I have some evil plotting meetings to attend to. Good day!"
Peter grunted in reply, and continued gnawing his housemate's shoulder.
***
"Lily, light one of those wicked blue fires you're so wonderfully talented at producing." Said James as the group arrived at their desired destination, by the frozen lake; the same place at which Lily and James had sat only months before in more pleasant weather.
Lily smiled at the compliment and lit several small fires atop cardboard coasters which she then levitated to hover (SAFELY) around the edges of the magically waterproof quilt Renee had just thrown down over the heavily snowed on ground.
Sirius was sitting on his heels on the rug, biting his lip in anticipation with a begging look in his eyes as Chloe began to unpack the large amount of food they'd brought.
Soon enough, the blanket was littered with plates and plates of food, including Sirius' promised poptarts. There was pumpkin pie, Shepard's pie, steak and kidney pie, chicken pie, lamb stew, beef stew, chicken stew, fish stew, vegetable stew, fruit stew, and a lamb/beef/chicken/fish/vegetable/fruit stew. They had chocolate pudding for dessert, and Chloe had brought a magicy-type thermos full of hot chocolate.
James was starting to become cranky because he hadn't had any apple related foods today, so Lily grabbed a poptart and transfigured it into a large shiny red apple for him. James, in his delight, leant over to kiss Lily, but stopped instantly at the steely look in Renee's eyes. He instead gave her an awkward pat on the head.
Half an hour later, Amanda who was contentedly sated, performed a scouring charm on all of the plates and mugs and then helped Lily stack everything back inside the boxes.
Sirius was laying on his back clutching his bloated stomach. He had over- indulged himself slightly in the poptart department. James however was buzzing merrily since he'd devoured his apple, and was looking for something with which to entertain himself.
Gaining inspiration from Lily's brilliant use of transfiguration, he raced out towards the lake and took off his shoes. His sudden movement had alerted Sirius, who was now watching him curiously.
"Glacies calceus" muttered James, and his dusty old sneakers turned into forest green leather ice skates. He laughed at his own brilliance, and pulled them on.
By now the whole group was watching him silently, with smiles of admiration painted on their happy little faces. James was shakily sliding onto the icy lake, arms outstretched, determined not to make a complete ass out of himself.
Lily walked over to the lake and took off her shoes as well. She said the charm, and her shiny black mary-janes transformed into perfect, gleaming white ice skates. James turned around and held out his hand. Lily took it and nervously shuffled onto the slippery ice.
Before long, the remaining teens had transfigured their shoes. Amanda was wearing sparkling red skates, Sirius; sexy black patent-leather, Chloe; baby pink, and Renee; lurid bright orange skates.
Sirius and James, being the Macho-Men that they were, insisted on skating around the lake first, checking that it was safe for them to be prancing on.
When the boys were satisfied, they made their way back to the girls and they all set off, although some wobbling fiercely, trying to get their balance.
Amanda was clutching Sirius' arm in a feeble attempt to remain vertical, and an irritated squawk from Renee made Sirius look around. He laughed when he realised her objection. "Screw your rule, Renee. But if we disappear behind a tree I give you permission to slap me." Both of them laughed heartily at this extremely non-humorous, barely-there joke, and continued their exploration.
After about 20 minutes, those who weren't completely untalented in the skating arena, went right out across the lake to show off; leaving Renee and Amanda grasping each others' arms, trying not to slide into an awkward position.
Within a few minutes they had attained enough confidence to both move approximately 2 metres forward; only to lose their nerve and scurry back towards each other immediately.
*
The red-faced able foursome returned to the lake's edge half an hour later to find Amanda and Renee sitting on the transfigured rug, now an inflatable couch, reading stupid girly magazines they had summoned from their room.
Amanda gave them a haughty smile and Renee giggled. "We're really not into the whole...recreational frolicking...scene. But! While you were prancing around in the cold, Renee and I were learning how to optimise our eyelashes by just a simple move of the mascara brush. Now that, is useful."
James gave the girls a mortified look, but Sirius just shrugged off his beloved's ditziness and squeezed himself in between them on the small couch.
Lily rolled her eyes as she performed the reversal charm (Reverto calceus) on her shoes and walked over to lean against James' chest. Renee, who was happy fiddling with her hair, and Chloe who didn't really care anymore, said nothing about this act of affection.
"Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm freezing so lets go back inside and defrost. The others readily agreed, and after five minutes of un- transfiguring and packing up, the cheerful group made their way slowly back up to the castle.
*
Once thoroughly thawed, Lily sat at a table in the Gryffindor common room with her eyebrows furrowed, studying a complicated looking planetary chart.
James was growing tired of watching Sirius and a brawny sixth year play a vicious game of exploding snap for 5 galleons, and he turned to watch Lily in her state of concentration. He grinned cheekily as a very sinful thought marched into his head, set up camp and began cooking a potato. Trying to be as subtle as possible, James wandered over to where Lily was sitting.
"Looks like fun." He said. Lily jumped at the sound of his voice and then smiled.
"Oh yeah, oodles." She smirked then pulled out a chair next to her and invited James to sit. He obliged happily, and settled himself very close to Lily.
She continued to read on, occasionally stopping to scrawl something in a nearby note book. James remained silent, however he was sneakily moving closer to Lily and swiftly snaked his arm around her back.
Lily smiled impishly and pretended not to notice James' implications. She persisted with her homework for the next few minutes, amid James' increasingly mischievous actions. It seemed however that her breaking point was when James began to blow softly over her ears and wafted the wispy hair around her face.
She immediately threw her quill down and leapt out of her chair. James was looking at her anxiously, wondering if he was in trouble. His concerns however were proved unwarranted when Lily grabbed his shirt and pulled him from his seat and upstairs towards the boys' dormitories.
***
Author's Note: Argh! *Gets down on her hands and knees* Please don't eat me! I extended that chapter quite a bit to try and grovel my way back into acceptable status due to my incomparable absence and abandonment of duty. Man...I'm such a nerd. But hey if you're ever short a thesaurus...*ahem* Again, my sincerest apologies for being so crap. I hope this chapter is okay though...I am merely the messenger for a much higher power! I was so stuck and uninspired I just couldn't write at all...but my darling beautiful muse, your excellently fantastic author of all the 'masculine' odd numbered chapters, Jade, wrote paragraphs 3 and 4 for me to get me cooking! And it turned out wonderfully in my opinion! Bow down to the majestic greatness that is Jade! *Bows*
I might answer some reviews now...Yes...must continue grovelling...
Childofoceans: Hey! I agree with you on the vixen-esquity; so I added my lame PG-13 attempt at a vamp-ish Lily in the last paragraph. Oh I am just too racy. Anyway, I shall keep that in mind the next time she arrives on set ;)
Kimmie: You rule me. Thankyou so much for bothering to read our depraved lil story! Good luck with your school stuff my love!
Elven Dagger: I agree with you totally...Hehe. Stuff in this story is generally pretty random, and the reasoning is screwed because it's written by two veeeery different people. But I'm not too worried about it because the general overtone in this story is light-hearted; it's not necessarily supposed to make sense. Thanks for the constructive-ness! I definitely bear all of those factors in mind when I write...believe it or not.
Eric2: Jade and I have contemplated writing some outtakes when we've finished this story, however there will be no boat mooring, rousing games of 'hide the sausage', vacuuming the carpet, tube-snake boogying, trips to the Hawaiian island 'kom-on-I-wanna-lay-er', lube jobs/oil changes, or partaking of pink tacos in this version. Besides the fact we could be sued for advocating child pornography (the kiddies are only 15) or something. No, no we couldn't, but you get the idea. I am sure though that Jade and I will not be averse to including a few more 'fade-to-black' scenes for your infuriation ;)
Sakura_tree101: Yup, that dream was an evil journey I ventured on in my freakishly heavy slumber. Except it was me, not Sirius :P I'd love to include some of my weird drug induced hallucinations in this story...but I really don't want to scare the lovely readers away. Jade would never forgive me.
Thankyou to everyone else to who reviewed! And those who don't review but still read! And a special thankyou on behalf of Jade for those who included random phrases for her to play with in her next chapter. Her Internet is being gay at the moment however, so a delay could be possible.
Farewell and Goodnight.
*Ahem* Sorry for my stupid lateness. This stupid chapter will be stupidly completed tonight! I am stupidly determined!
Happy 20th chapter to all! Yaaay!
***
Amanda seemed to find solace in the fact that she now seemed to have Sirius totally benquoined to her, and was crying much less throughout the day. She'd opted not to attend her cousin's funeral, as it coincided terribly with the last Hogsmeade weekend before Christmas.
James and Sirius hardly spent any time together that week, as they were both rather preoccupied with their newfound companions. They shared only quick, heavy-eyed conversations at the breakfast table and short sentences between classes.
By Friday, Renee and Chloe were rather worried about James and Sirius and Amanda and Lily. They didn't seem to even acknowledge each other. Lily was never seen anywhere without James, and Amanda never left Sirius' side. At first it was cute that they were all so in love, but now it was just nauseating.
On Saturday morning, Renee and Chloe ran down to the kitchens early and packed three picnic baskets with scrummy winter foods then went to find their friends. They were going to have a big group picnic lunch, and lovey- dovey behaviour was strictly forbidden.
It was between the hours of nine and ten that the foursome made their individual ways out of their rooms. Renee and Chloe were anxiously awaiting their awakening, chatting at a table on which the picnic baskets were stacked.
When finally Sirius emerged with puffy eyes and his ever-scruffy hair, Renee and Chloe dragged them outside despite their complaining; baskets levitating happily behind them.
"What is wrong with you? It's winter and it's freezing...I'm not going out there to picnic with you, I wont." Stated a grumpy Amanda. Lily and James however were giggling together as they meandered along with the group, looking very cosy indeed.
Renee turned to answer Amanda, but faulted at once on seeing James and Lily. "Hey you two! Cut it out, there will be none of that today. This is a purely platonic outing which will be suitable for the eyes and minds of children under five, and would not cause those children to ask questions of their squicky parents, do you understand?" Lily immediately dropped James' hand and started fidgeting nervously with her head bowed. James however gave an indignant grunt, but rather terrified by Renee's expression, took a step away from Lily.
Sirius who had been straggling behind the group until now, sped up and was goggling at Renee and Chloe as if they were insane. "Do you mean to tell me, that you are taking us outside in the freezing subzero weather while it's snowing, to sit around like good little pancake children who abide happily by the ten centimetre rule?" He asked incredulously.
Chloe gave him a cheeky smile. "We brought poptarts. Every flavour." She said simply.
Sirius' expression changed completely into one of joy. "Well, I'm sold." He said with a businessmanlike air and sped up to lead the group.
***
Meanwhile at the breakfast table, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew were catching up over some marmalade soup jelly pie. Peter was concerned (in an evil, rattish way of course) about Remus' withdrawn behaviour lately. He also was silently wanting to know why he had been spotted fraternising with Snape on more than one occasion.
"You were so close to James and Sirius though. Surely it's nothing that can't be worked out?" Said Peter fairly.
"Oh well I'm sure it can be worked out...You see, I don't even know why James hates me. Sirius has no reason to, although I haven't spoken to him properly in quite a while. No, I think this is nothing more than a fault of a couple of insane teenagers somewhere in Australia writing me badly. I mean, everyone knows I'm not evil. But I understand these girls woes...with the absence of super-sexy-evil Draco Malfoy, and Severus being so pathetic and cute, they are rather short of a villain. I, being the kind soul I am, am more than happy to be of service." Said Remus with a rather vacant smile.
"Oh..." said Peter. Rather frightened. In an attempt to hide his terror and slight concern for Remus' sanity, he turned to the person next to him and started gnawing on their shoulder.
Remus, who wasn't disconcerted by this at all, smiled cheerfully and slapped Peter gently on the back before getting up. "Well if you'll excuse me Peter, you look rather occupied, and I have some evil plotting meetings to attend to. Good day!"
Peter grunted in reply, and continued gnawing his housemate's shoulder.
***
"Lily, light one of those wicked blue fires you're so wonderfully talented at producing." Said James as the group arrived at their desired destination, by the frozen lake; the same place at which Lily and James had sat only months before in more pleasant weather.
Lily smiled at the compliment and lit several small fires atop cardboard coasters which she then levitated to hover (SAFELY) around the edges of the magically waterproof quilt Renee had just thrown down over the heavily snowed on ground.
Sirius was sitting on his heels on the rug, biting his lip in anticipation with a begging look in his eyes as Chloe began to unpack the large amount of food they'd brought.
Soon enough, the blanket was littered with plates and plates of food, including Sirius' promised poptarts. There was pumpkin pie, Shepard's pie, steak and kidney pie, chicken pie, lamb stew, beef stew, chicken stew, fish stew, vegetable stew, fruit stew, and a lamb/beef/chicken/fish/vegetable/fruit stew. They had chocolate pudding for dessert, and Chloe had brought a magicy-type thermos full of hot chocolate.
James was starting to become cranky because he hadn't had any apple related foods today, so Lily grabbed a poptart and transfigured it into a large shiny red apple for him. James, in his delight, leant over to kiss Lily, but stopped instantly at the steely look in Renee's eyes. He instead gave her an awkward pat on the head.
Half an hour later, Amanda who was contentedly sated, performed a scouring charm on all of the plates and mugs and then helped Lily stack everything back inside the boxes.
Sirius was laying on his back clutching his bloated stomach. He had over- indulged himself slightly in the poptart department. James however was buzzing merrily since he'd devoured his apple, and was looking for something with which to entertain himself.
Gaining inspiration from Lily's brilliant use of transfiguration, he raced out towards the lake and took off his shoes. His sudden movement had alerted Sirius, who was now watching him curiously.
"Glacies calceus" muttered James, and his dusty old sneakers turned into forest green leather ice skates. He laughed at his own brilliance, and pulled them on.
By now the whole group was watching him silently, with smiles of admiration painted on their happy little faces. James was shakily sliding onto the icy lake, arms outstretched, determined not to make a complete ass out of himself.
Lily walked over to the lake and took off her shoes as well. She said the charm, and her shiny black mary-janes transformed into perfect, gleaming white ice skates. James turned around and held out his hand. Lily took it and nervously shuffled onto the slippery ice.
Before long, the remaining teens had transfigured their shoes. Amanda was wearing sparkling red skates, Sirius; sexy black patent-leather, Chloe; baby pink, and Renee; lurid bright orange skates.
Sirius and James, being the Macho-Men that they were, insisted on skating around the lake first, checking that it was safe for them to be prancing on.
When the boys were satisfied, they made their way back to the girls and they all set off, although some wobbling fiercely, trying to get their balance.
Amanda was clutching Sirius' arm in a feeble attempt to remain vertical, and an irritated squawk from Renee made Sirius look around. He laughed when he realised her objection. "Screw your rule, Renee. But if we disappear behind a tree I give you permission to slap me." Both of them laughed heartily at this extremely non-humorous, barely-there joke, and continued their exploration.
After about 20 minutes, those who weren't completely untalented in the skating arena, went right out across the lake to show off; leaving Renee and Amanda grasping each others' arms, trying not to slide into an awkward position.
Within a few minutes they had attained enough confidence to both move approximately 2 metres forward; only to lose their nerve and scurry back towards each other immediately.
*
The red-faced able foursome returned to the lake's edge half an hour later to find Amanda and Renee sitting on the transfigured rug, now an inflatable couch, reading stupid girly magazines they had summoned from their room.
Amanda gave them a haughty smile and Renee giggled. "We're really not into the whole...recreational frolicking...scene. But! While you were prancing around in the cold, Renee and I were learning how to optimise our eyelashes by just a simple move of the mascara brush. Now that, is useful."
James gave the girls a mortified look, but Sirius just shrugged off his beloved's ditziness and squeezed himself in between them on the small couch.
Lily rolled her eyes as she performed the reversal charm (Reverto calceus) on her shoes and walked over to lean against James' chest. Renee, who was happy fiddling with her hair, and Chloe who didn't really care anymore, said nothing about this act of affection.
"Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm freezing so lets go back inside and defrost. The others readily agreed, and after five minutes of un- transfiguring and packing up, the cheerful group made their way slowly back up to the castle.
*
Once thoroughly thawed, Lily sat at a table in the Gryffindor common room with her eyebrows furrowed, studying a complicated looking planetary chart.
James was growing tired of watching Sirius and a brawny sixth year play a vicious game of exploding snap for 5 galleons, and he turned to watch Lily in her state of concentration. He grinned cheekily as a very sinful thought marched into his head, set up camp and began cooking a potato. Trying to be as subtle as possible, James wandered over to where Lily was sitting.
"Looks like fun." He said. Lily jumped at the sound of his voice and then smiled.
"Oh yeah, oodles." She smirked then pulled out a chair next to her and invited James to sit. He obliged happily, and settled himself very close to Lily.
She continued to read on, occasionally stopping to scrawl something in a nearby note book. James remained silent, however he was sneakily moving closer to Lily and swiftly snaked his arm around her back.
Lily smiled impishly and pretended not to notice James' implications. She persisted with her homework for the next few minutes, amid James' increasingly mischievous actions. It seemed however that her breaking point was when James began to blow softly over her ears and wafted the wispy hair around her face.
She immediately threw her quill down and leapt out of her chair. James was looking at her anxiously, wondering if he was in trouble. His concerns however were proved unwarranted when Lily grabbed his shirt and pulled him from his seat and upstairs towards the boys' dormitories.
***
Author's Note: Argh! *Gets down on her hands and knees* Please don't eat me! I extended that chapter quite a bit to try and grovel my way back into acceptable status due to my incomparable absence and abandonment of duty. Man...I'm such a nerd. But hey if you're ever short a thesaurus...*ahem* Again, my sincerest apologies for being so crap. I hope this chapter is okay though...I am merely the messenger for a much higher power! I was so stuck and uninspired I just couldn't write at all...but my darling beautiful muse, your excellently fantastic author of all the 'masculine' odd numbered chapters, Jade, wrote paragraphs 3 and 4 for me to get me cooking! And it turned out wonderfully in my opinion! Bow down to the majestic greatness that is Jade! *Bows*
I might answer some reviews now...Yes...must continue grovelling...
Childofoceans: Hey! I agree with you on the vixen-esquity; so I added my lame PG-13 attempt at a vamp-ish Lily in the last paragraph. Oh I am just too racy. Anyway, I shall keep that in mind the next time she arrives on set ;)
Kimmie: You rule me. Thankyou so much for bothering to read our depraved lil story! Good luck with your school stuff my love!
Elven Dagger: I agree with you totally...Hehe. Stuff in this story is generally pretty random, and the reasoning is screwed because it's written by two veeeery different people. But I'm not too worried about it because the general overtone in this story is light-hearted; it's not necessarily supposed to make sense. Thanks for the constructive-ness! I definitely bear all of those factors in mind when I write...believe it or not.
Eric2: Jade and I have contemplated writing some outtakes when we've finished this story, however there will be no boat mooring, rousing games of 'hide the sausage', vacuuming the carpet, tube-snake boogying, trips to the Hawaiian island 'kom-on-I-wanna-lay-er', lube jobs/oil changes, or partaking of pink tacos in this version. Besides the fact we could be sued for advocating child pornography (the kiddies are only 15) or something. No, no we couldn't, but you get the idea. I am sure though that Jade and I will not be averse to including a few more 'fade-to-black' scenes for your infuriation ;)
Sakura_tree101: Yup, that dream was an evil journey I ventured on in my freakishly heavy slumber. Except it was me, not Sirius :P I'd love to include some of my weird drug induced hallucinations in this story...but I really don't want to scare the lovely readers away. Jade would never forgive me.
Thankyou to everyone else to who reviewed! And those who don't review but still read! And a special thankyou on behalf of Jade for those who included random phrases for her to play with in her next chapter. Her Internet is being gay at the moment however, so a delay could be possible.
Farewell and Goodnight.