Title: Philosophy Night
Rating: G
Spoilers: None. Vague knowledge of season 4.
Disclaimer: I Own Nothing.
Summary: Answer to David's Challenge #5: Study night. All dialogue.

Okay, Talon's closed for the night. Let's get cracking"

"Umm… Lois aren't you forgetting something?"

"Give me some credit Chlo. Clark?"

"I brought your notebook and all the books I could find. Maybe if you weren't so messy I could have found your copies of Clouds and Rousseau's Social Contract."

"Half that stuff in my room is yours. They're probably hiding under all those copies of the Farmer's Almanac."

"Guys, please."

"Yeah, I'm with Lana on this one. I'd actually like to pass this class."

"So would I, so quit the complaining Smallville. I'll just share yours."

"Fine. All right, I guess we should start with Aristophanes and Plato. Which one do you want to do first? Clouds? Apology of Socrates or The Republic?"

"The Prince!"

"Lois!"

"Well Machiavelli and I are kindred spirits. Aristophanes' wrote Clouds just to win a prize and to prove to Socrates that he was his intellectual equal. Although those Greeks and their crude humor— "

"Wow Lois, did you actually read all of the texts?"

"Of course Cous'. Do you think I take my education lightly? Shut up Kent."

"I didn't say anything!"

"You laughed."

"Chloe, how about you and I take Aristophanes and Plato. Clark, you and Lois can argue all you want over Machiavelli and Hobbes. Then we can all discuss Rousseau."

"Sounds good Lana. At least you and I will get some work done. Do you think you two might be able to stop bickering long enough to get these questions done?"

"I resent that. Clark and I will have these questions answered with amazing insight and quality."

"Yeah."

"Nice one Smallville. That's the best you could come up with? Yeah? Reverting back to your elementary days?"

"Right, well, you prove us wrong. While you're doing that, Chloe and I are just going to spread out at the next table."

"Well it's just us now Farmboy. Let's see these stupid questions. Hmmm… okay let's look at the common themes of what Machiavelli and Hobbes believed to be the best for the people."

"Hobbes' view of humans in the state of nature is brutish, nasty and short. People seek to destroy each other."

"Sounds a lot like today, huh? Okay Smallville, explain the role of the Sovereign in reference to the Leviathan. Wow me with that brain of yours"

"I thought I 'wow' you every day just with my presence."

"Ha! Keep dreaming."

"Really, so a few days ago when I walked in on you after your shower you weren't the least bit affected?"

"Would you keep it down Smallville? Lana and Chloe are right there. And they're giving us weird looks."

"So you weren't the least bit flustered when I came in?"

"No! Yes. No. You just caught me off guard. I swore I locked that door."

"Having a hard time making up your mind Lois?"

"Shut up. So the Sovereign…you want me to answer? Seems like your ego's getting in the way of our studying here."

"Not at all. I'm just wondering how much longer you're going to do this denial thing for. And the answer: the sovereign is the head of the Leviathan, the maker of laws, the judge of first principles, the foundation of all knowledge, and the defender of civil peace."

"Correct. Good memory. And I'm not in denial."

"Keep telling yourself that Lois."

"Focus Kent."

"Yes, sir!"

"Don't mock me. That salute was just sad."

"Ouch. I know you like to touch me but if you aren't careful people are going to think you have a physical abuse issue."

"Grrrr Clark— "

"Are you growling at me?"

"I'm exhausted, can you please leave the annoying me until tomorrow?"

"And I should listen because you would do the same for me?"

"You're really on a roll tonight aren't you? You know that smug look is really unbecoming."

"You're just mad that our roles have reversed."

"No. I just don't have time for your childish games. You look up Hobbes. I hate reading old English"

"You're really no fun tonight Lois."

"…"

"Wow. If looks could kill…"

"Oh. Chloe. You and Lana finished?"

"Yup, how about you guys?"

"Well, Clark here, decided now was the time to get all chatty and annoying as hell. But I persevered and these bloody questions are done."

"I? Excuse me I did half of them. Have you noticed Lois has been grumpier than usual today?"

"Do you have a death wish?"

"Lois, why don't you take a break and help Lana get some coffee or something."

"Good idea Chloe. If I have to stare at that smug face one minute longer I'm not going to be held responsible for my actions."

"Alright, Clark what's going on?"

"What do you mean?"

"What did you do to my cousin? She's been…temperamental to say the least, and most especially around you."

"What makes you think I did anything? Lois and temperamental is nothing new."

"Don't give me that innocent look Clark. It has something to do with you for two reasons; one- you and Lois have been almost inseparable this year. I know you guys have become close. And two- as soon as anyone mentions your name she goes all weird and awkward."

"Fine. But Chloe, you tell her I told you, she'll kill me."

"I promise! I won't utter so much as a peep."

"You don't have to whisper, I'll hear when they come out."

"Oh, right. Spill."

"Ah, well, you know how this last year and a half we've become… well, friends. Good friends actually, despite our tendency to annoy each other we really do get along pretty well."

"Yeah. I've seen you two when you think no one else is around."

"Well the thing is, last week there was a slight, umm… bathroom incident. Let's just say it was… unexpected, and ever since Lois has been acting weird."

"Bathroom incident? Oh my god you're blushing. You're going to explain that right?"

"No."

"Are you kidding? You can't do that to me!"

"Chloe focus. I'm not telling you any more than you need to know right now. Lois is already going to kill me if she finds out."

"You do realize I'm going to find out eventually, right?"

"Yes. But that's irrelevant. You asked, I told. Be happy you got that."

"I can't believe this. You and Lois. A bathroom incident."

"What? It's that surprising?"

"Hey don't look so indignant. It's just Lana and I had a bet it would take you guys at least another couple of months for an 'incident' to occur."

"What! You're making bets? Nice friends we've got."

"Well the school pool is getting pretty high. Would you mind keeping things on the down low for the summer until school starts in September?"

"Chloe!"

"I could really use that money."

"Well, it's possible. Lois in denial could last longer than that, I'm sure."

"Oh. Don't look so down. If anyone can wear her down it's you. Just pull out that Kent charm and smile. And shirtless is always a good option."

"…"

"Okay, okay. Just kidding. Calm down, you can be so—"

"SHHH! Here they come."

"Here's some quick advice; you've almost got her worn down. One right move,and who knows?"

"We're back with sustenance. This should get us through the night."

"Yeah, coffee and cookies. A staple of the Lane study diet."

"Perfect. Let's get to work."

"Finally! Done. My brain hurts."

"Really, Chloe? Well at least you're crashing here with Lana. I have to try and make it back to the farm without passing out."

"I can't believe it's nearly 5 in the morning. C'mon Chloe, we still have to make it up those stairs. Night guys."

"Coming. Good night Lois, night Clark."

"Mmm, night Chlo. Lana. God what a day, early morning at the Talon, studying till dawn... I don't think I can even stand."

"C'mon Lois, I'll drive us home. I have your stuff; all you have to do is walk. I'll push you."

"Mmanks mmlark"

"Maybe you shouldn't speak if you keep yawning like that. It's kind of scary."

"Just open the door."

"Lois, we're here. Lois? Lois, wake up."

"Nooo"

"There's a big comfy bed waiting for you upstairs."

"I was having a great dream."

"Sorry, but if you slept in the truck you would be stiff and sore tomorrow. Or today."

"I hate your logic."

"That's just because you know I'm right."

"Don't forget to carry in our bags."

"Got them right here. Although I think you're the one who needs to be carried in."

"Funny Farmboy. I'm not some calf you can carry over your shoulder."

"…"

"That kind of came out wrong. I hope we don't wake up your parents. Night, Smallville."

"Good night Lois."

"Clark?"

"Hmm?"

"I can't sleep. I'm so overtired that my mind won't stop. And I got bored of counting Predator RQ-1 Unmanned Aerial Vehicles and CV90 Tracked Armored Combat Vehicles."

"What?"

"Move over. Thanks. When I was younger and I couldn't sleep, my dad would tell me to count military vehicles or whatever new toy they had come up with, and describe its basic features and purpose. It was more interesting than counting sheep."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. It did pay off when I learned to drive some of them."

"That's…different."

"Yup, life on the base was never dull, that's for sure."

"It explains a lot about you."

"Maybe. I definitely didn't have the average American childhood."

"And there definitely isn't anything average about you."

"Clark—"

"I know, I know. We'll stick to friends."

"Good friends."

"It's settled then. Now quit hogging the couch and I'll tell you some of those embarrassing childhood stories you like so much."

"Great, but I'm sharing your blanket."

"Do I have a choice?"

"No. Mmm…your shoulder makes a good pillow."

"Thanks, I think."

"Clark?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks. For everything. Our friendship means a lot to me. I know I don't exactly let you know that.

"You're welcome. And you mean a lot to me too, Lois."

"Now quit stalling. I want to hear some embarrassing little Clark stories."

The End.