A/N: Ya'll know I don't own anybody. Otherwise, Gil and Sara would be together. Brittni, I highly suggest not drinking anything while you read this. I don't want you spitting it all over your keyboard when you read the line. Anybody else, it's not something you would find entirely funny so don't bother searching for it. Oh and Italics indicate Grissom's mother's ASL lines, thoughts or the other half of phone conversations. /Italics/ indicates anyone else's ASL lines. I had to do that because it got confusing when Grissom is signing with his mother, as to who says what. Anyway, on with it…
4:30am
Crime Scene in North Las Vegas
Grissom's attention was pulled away from the body before him by the shrill ringing of his cell phone.
"Grissom," he answered.
"Is this Gilbert Grissom?""Yes, who is this?"
"Mr. Grissom, this is Dr. Avery. I'm a cardiologist at Cedar-Sinai. I'm sorry to inform you that your mother had a heart attack yesterday at about 9:30 pm."
"What? Is she okay? I mean, of course not, is she going to be okay? How serious is it?" Grissom, normally calm and collected, was scared. Sara, who'd been working the now forgotten scene with Grissom, looked up at the frantic tone in his voice.
"Mr. Grissom your mother should be able to go home in a few days, five at the most, but I have a feeling she's going to need monitoring after she gets out. She's gotten the idea in her head that she's fine and doesn't need to cooperate." Grissom would have smiled under any other situation.
"That sounds like her Doctor."
"You live in Vegas, correct?""Yes sir."
"You may want to consider bringing her closer so you can keep a closer eye on her. At the very least, come and visit her."
"Oh, of course I will Doctor. This is my mother we're talking about."
"Very well Mr. Grissom, I talk to you when you get to LA."
"See you then" Grissom hung up the phone, the news settling over him as he started towards the car. He needed to get to the lab and put in his request for vacation time. After all, he had enough days saved up.
"Grissom." He turned around at the sound of Sara's voice. "Did you forget that I rode with you? Not to mention, you might not want to leave your kit at a crime scene," she pointed out, holding up the silver flight case in question. He grinned sheepishly.
"Right. I was a little distracted. Umm… I'll send Nick out to help you finish up, and you can ride back with him." He took his kit from her, turning to go.
"Where are you going anyway?"
"LA," he shot back over his shoulder, leaving her bewildered. That guy drives me NUTS! And I'm still in love with him! She shook her head, turning back to the scene.
8:37am
Cedar-Sinai, Room 316, Los Angles
/Hello Mother he signed, walking into the hospital room
Gilbert, what are you doing here? You should be in Vegas working with that brunette you're always talking about.
/Well, you don't take long to get to the point. What have I told you about Sara and me? Besides, shift's over/ he signed, using the sign for 'butterfly' instead of finger spelling Sara's name, just as she normally used the sign for 'bug' in reference to him. She'd know what he was talking about.
Sometimes complicated isn't a bad thing.
/So, the doctors tell me you haven't been behaving. /
You're changing the topic.
/You're avoiding the question/ What question/Why are you giving the doctors a hard time/ Why are you so scared of Sara?/Answer my question. /
You first.
/Not sure. /
Me either. Why'd it take a heart attack to get you to come visit me?
/Because whenever I do you don't want to talk about anything but Sara. By the way, I'm taking you back to Vegas with me. /
No you're not. You have your own life. You don't need me anymore.
/Actually, I don't really have much of a life and you need to be looked after. /
Do not.
/We are not arguing about this now. You need to get some sleep. /
Do not.
/Mother. / He gave her warning look.
Gilbert. She fingerspelled this and Grissom could tell she was frustrated with him.
/Good night Mother, I'm going to get some breakfast. You better be asleep when I get back. / He turned his back, walking out the door, ignoring her exasperated, "Gilbert Grissom."
Well that went well, he thought.
11:46am
Cedar-Sinai, Room 316, Los Angles
Grissom turned the TV on, flipping through the channels. He settled on a show about butterflies on the Discovery Channel. He doesn't know why, but butterflies have always reminded him of Sara. Something about their simplistic beauty. Even before Debbie Marlin. That's why he has them shadow boxed in his town house. He knows he loves Sara, he just doesn't know how to express it or what to do about it.He's afraid of what might happen if he did do something. Not work wise; he knows she's worth that risk. Sure, he'd told Lorry that's why he'd turned her down, but it wasn't that. He was afraid he might lose her. Afraid he might be too late as she'd said he would be, and she'd run back to San Francisco. Leaving him alone, just as his father had.
"You need to talk to her Gil." He turned around at the sound of his mother's voice.
/Good Morning Mother. / He signed.
Not funny. I'm not kidding.
/What's there to talk about with her anymore/ The remorse was evident in his expression.
How about your feelings for her?
/Can't/
Why not? He sighed, glancing at his feet and when he didn't respond, she added aloud, "Talk to me Gilbert."
/I'm scared. What if she runs? What if she loses her job because of me? She'll hate me for it. And least of all, what if I lose my job? She'd think it was all her fault, which it wouldn't be, but she'd torment herself over it. She's like you. /
How so? He smiled.
/Stubborn beyond belief. /
Well if she's so stubborn, then why hasn't she asked you out? Grissom blushed and his eyes returned to his Doc Martins.
/She has. /
"What! And you told her no?" Grissom knew that she was frustrated. He nodded sheepishly. Here he was 47 years old and being yelled at by his mother.
Go get some lunch Gilbert; she signed turning to look out the window.
12:15
A small shop outside the hospital, Los Angles
Grissom wandered the isles, content not to have a purpose beyond passing time. There was no way he was going back to the room to be yelled at like he was fifteen. He browsed, catching something out of the corner of his eye. It was a beautiful diamond necklace; only the diamonds were cut into almond-shapes and placed into a butterfly. He sighed. Couldn't he ever escape her? She'd completely captivated his life and she didn't even know it. He wanted so badly to have a reason to buy it for her, if only to see her smile. Up until about the first year or so after she'd come to Vegas they'd exchanged gifts on any occasion when they'd have an excuse. Christmas, Birthdays, he'd even brought her back souvenirs from conferences, simply because he enjoyed showering her with gifts. But, they'd fallen out of the habit. What would she say if he bought it for her? He could save it for birthday, which was… shit! Her birthday was next week. Would she be grateful, or would she become annoyed with his mixed messages? He sighed, realizing it would most likely be the later. Why couldn't they make it work? He wanted so badly to make it work. To be able to put away his fears. But, the fears where so deeply rooted that he wasn't sure he could do it. Grissom could remember little of the years after his father had left beyond school, and sitting in his room, reading, wishing he had a father to go outside and play with. Sure his mother took him outside, but five-year-old Grissom still missed his father. Eventually, he'd gotten used to the loneliness. To change that would be too risky. He sighed. Walk away from the butterfly, Gil. The problem was, he didn't want to walk away from the amazing combination of brains and beauty that was Sara Sidle.
12:37pm
Cedar-Sinai, Room 316, Los Angles
Hello his mother signed as he walked into the hospital room.
/Hello. / He walked over to his suitcase, opening up the smaller compartment, and pulling out a book. He noticed his cell, realizing he hadn't turned it back on since the flight. Taking it out, he turned it on. He checked his voice mail. 5 new messages. The first one was from Catherine.
Gil, Sara said you left her at a crime scene and gunned it out of there like it was on fire, telling her only that you were going to LA. Is everything okay? Call me when you get this.
The next one was from Jim.
You gotta be careful about leaving so spontaneously. We'll start thinking you've got a girl down there. Call me.
The last three were from the same person. A person who'd been much talked about in the last four hours
Grissom, it's me. Uh…call me when you get this.
Grissom, is everything okay with your mom? Call me.
Damn it Grissom, now you've got me worried. Would it have killed you to give me more than a two-letter answer? Call me.
He closed the phone, putting it back in the suitcase. He walked over to the chair, opening the book.
"You're not even going to call her?"
/Who Mother/
Don't play dumb with me Gilbert. It doesn't suit you. Seems to me I taught you better than to ignore a girl when she leaves you three messages. He sighed.
/ I'd just be an emotional mess if I called her, Mother. /
And it would kill you to let the girl know she can make you an emotional mess?
/She'd laugh. /
This is a fact? He sighed.
/Fine. I'll call her. / He got up, walking over and getting up, he grabbed his cell phone. /but I'm not doing it in here. / He informed his mother. He walked out of the room and downstairs. He decided he'd go outside. Once there he sighed, his finger over the speed dial. He took a deep breath and before he could change his mind, he hit the button. She picked up on the second ring.
"God Grissom. Eight hours to return my call?""Actually, I've only been in LA for four hours."
"So, you going to tell me what's going on with your mother that had you so frantic this morning?" He sighed.
"She had a heart attack."
"Is she going to be okay?""I only briefly talked with her doctor when I first got here this morning, so I don't know much, but she definitely seems okay," Grissom said, adding to himself, I mean she's been pestering me about you all morning.
"How are you?" Her question caught him off guard and he found himself answering with
"I don't know Sara. She's always been extremely healthy. It's a little hard to realize she might not always be around."
"Yeah, it's amazing how quickly you can find yourself virtually parentless."
"Sara…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insinuate that what you went through… This is nothing compared to that…"
"What are you talking about? You didn't insinuate anything.""I just thought that maybe you thought that…" The smile in her stubbornly Valley-Girl lilt was both obvious, and contagious.
"The great Gil Grissom just jumped to a conclusion."
Finding it hard to be mad at her, he wasn't very convincing when he said, "I most certainly did not Ms. Sidle. I was simply… covering my bases." There was an awkward silence before Grissom came up with, "So Sidle, how'd the case go? Being the great CSIs that you are, I'm sure you and Nick have already solved it?" Had Grissom, back behind his mask, been listening to her tone, rather than her words when she began telling him about the case, he would have detected her disappointment at the subject change.
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I hope you like it so far. As always, read and review. Just to warn you I'm finishing up another fic before continuing with this one, I just got hit in the head by this idea and it refused to go unwritten.