Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from the television show Charmed. All characters belong to Spelling Television, and The WB.
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The Pain of Future Wrongs – Chapter 60
Piper closed her eyes and cringed as the sound of books being thrown against the wall resounded throughout the manor. She would have thought that after an hour or so of the pounding books, she would be used to it. But knowing the reasons behind the rampage in the library made her heart sink. No one had dared to enter the library since this started and the entire family was just staring sullenly at the door, their minds preoccupied by the predicament faced by the young man on the other side of the door.
Another set of books was mercilessly thrown against the wall. Wyatt closed his eyes and summoned his will to hold his tears back. Only several seconds passed before the Twice-Blessed was forced to open his eyes again. Every time his eyes closed, he would see the scene being replayed over and over again. Chris with the bottle in his hands, Chris running out the door, Chris shoving him away, the car heading towards Chris, Chris flying through the air, Chris lying on the ground, Chris in a wheelchair.
A set of strong arms wrapped around his shoulder and Wyatt looked over to see Ryan pulling him into a hug. "It's not fair…" Wyatt whispered. "It's not fair…"
"I know," Ryan answered the only way he could. No words of comfort would do any good now and there was no point trying to think of nice things to say.
The war with the books had stopped and a thick, eerie silence replaced the constant pounding on the walls. Wyatt shakily got up from his seat and headed toward the door. Piper reached out and held him back, knowing the fragile state that Wyatt was in at the moment.
"Let me go, Mom," he whispered, his eyes fixated on the library door.
"You're not ready for this," she said softly, her eyes full of love and grieve at the same time.
"I don't care…" he answered, his voice shaking. When Piper refused to let go, he yanked his hands away and advanced to the door. His hand reached for the doorknob and turned it ever so slowly.
A primal scream from inside the library caused Wyatt to jump back from the door. He could hear wracking sobs from the room and hearing this gave him a new resolve. Wyatt firmly grabbed the doorknob and opened the door. As quickly as his resolve came, it disappeared as he stepped into the library. Half-destroyed books were scattered everywhere. In the middle of the room sat Chris in his wheelchair, sobbing in anguish.
Sensing that he was not in the room himself, Chris's body tensed and he angrily brushed away his tears. "Get out…" he said in a steely voice.
Wyatt refused to budge and walked closer towards his younger brother. He kneeled down in front of him and looked him in the eye. He was met with a set of eyes that were at the same time cold as ice and hot as fire.
"I said get out…" Chris said again, his voice rising.
"No," Wyatt answered. "I'm not going to leave you like this."
"I don't need your pity!" Chris yelled. "I got what I deserved, okay? Now get out!!"
Wyatt was stung by Chris' words. He knew his brother was upset but how could Chris not realize that no one in the family would ever pity him? All they wanted to do was show him how much they loved him, no matter what the circumstances.
"You don't deserve this," Wyatt answered, his voice cracking. "This isn't your fault…"
"Just get the hell out!!!" Chris yelled furiously. "I don't want to see you!!"
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Piper set a bowl of soup on the tray and sighed as she walked up the stairs towards Chris' room. Ever since Paige had orbed him back to his room, Chris had not emerged. After Wyatt's attempt to talk to him ended so disastrously, Phoebe and Paige had also tried with similar results. Ryan gave it a shot and he only fared marginally better. He didn't manage to get through to Chris but at least he didn't have to bear the brunt of his older brother's wrath. Now, it was Piper's turn. She had already witnessed the treatment that her family members had received, so she was bracing for the worst.
She opened the door to see Chris staring out the window. His lunch sat on the table, completely untouched, as did his breakfast. His computer was turned on and it was obviously that he had been working at the terminal. Other than that, there was little sign of Chris' presence in the bedroom.
Piper sat the soup in front of Chris, silently hoping that he would not give her a hard time. She was exhausted and seeing Chris like this shattered her heart. She was so close having a breakdown of her own but she told herself to remain strong for her son.
"I'm not hungry," Chris answered flatly as he continued staring out the window.
"You have to eat something, Chris," Piper pleaded.
"I said I'm not hungry!!" he yelled as he, in one swift movement, pushed and toppled the small table in front of him, shattering the plates and bowls and causing Piper to cry out both from shock and from anguish.
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The month that followed was hellish for the entire Halliwell household. Chris was on a constant warpath and no one seemed able to get through to him. His temper rose to unseen levels and even Ryan was not immune from Chris' increasingly hostile behaviour.
Wyatt and Ryan worked late into the nights trying to find a way to break Chris' spell. No matter what they tried, however, the result was still the same. There was no way to reverse Chris' spell that blocked him from magical healing.
On this morning, Chris was scheduled to attend his first rehabilitation session. Of course, Chris made it clear on numerous occasions that he felt these sessions were a waste of time. His opposition to the sessions grew stronger as the scheduled date drew nearer, especially after the doctor reiterated that the sessions were not designed to get Chris to walk again but to help the rest of his body adjust to the new circumstances.
Phoebe and Paige watched from the front door as Piper drove down the street with Chris in the car. Not a word was said during the trip and the tension in the air was thick.
They finally arrived at the clinic after navigating through nightmarish rush hour traffic. Chris was wheeled into the room while Piper waited outside. She looked at her son and again, her heart became heavy. "Only twenty-three," she thought to herself, "why him? Why?"
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A young lady walked into the room and sat down across from Chris. She looked to be about Chris' age and it was obvious that she worked at the clinic. "So, you must be Chris," she said with a warm smile.
"Yeah," Chris said softly.
"Great! I'm Jamie and I'll be working with you on your rehabilitation program," she said as she extended her hand to the young man.
Chris took her hand and shook it. "Look," he said apologetically, "I don't want to waste your time because I see that there are a lot of other people waiting outside. I don't think this rehabilitation program is for me."
"Why do you say that, Chris?" she asked with a genuine smile.
"This program isn't going to help me walk again. I know that already. So I really don't see a point for me to go through with this. Plus, I don't want to burden my family, especially my Mom, with having to take me here everyday for something that can't be changed."
"You must love your family a lot, Chris," Jamie answered with understanding. "But you should know that you family loves you a lot too. Your Mom went through quite a hard time to get you into this rehabilitation centre, you know."
Chris looked up with questioning eyes. "What do you mean?"
"Well, the waiting list was getting so long, we were holding extra lotteries for people on the waiting list so that they can get treatment sooner. Each day we took the first 100 names and drew one name for accelerated treatment. Your Mom has been here first thing every morning, sometimes even before 6am, just to make sure that she got your name into the daily draw."
Chris felt a lump in his throat. "How long?" he asked, his voice cracking.
"Excuse me?"
"How long has she been doing this?"
"For the past month, Chris. She really loves you and wants you to get better. You don't want to let her down, do you?" Jamie asked as she gently squeezed Chris' hand.
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"So how was the session?" Piper asked, hoping that her son would not erupt in another tirade.
"It went okay," Chris answered softly, no hint of anger in his voice.
"I hear that Jamie is one of the best working in that centre."
"Yeah, she's cool," Chris replied. "Mom, can we take a detour to the beach? I haven't there in a long time."
"Sure, honey," she answered, happy that they managed to get through a mini-conversation without Chris shutting himself out.
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"Wow, I can't believe how long it's been since I was last here," Chris remarked as Piper pushed his wheelchair along the boardwalk.
"I used to come here with your dad all the time," Piper reminisced as they moved to a quieter area of the waterfront.
"I know," Chris answered, causing Piper to look at him in surprise. "Future, remember?" Piper laughed at the comment, forgetting for a moment that her twenty-three year-old son was indeed from the future. "I never realized how beautiful this place was. It's hard not to take things for granted until you lose everything…" his voice trailed off.
Piper wheeled Chris over to a bench and she sat facing. "Chris, you'll always have me. Remember that. And your dad, and your brothers are all here for you. And don't forget Phoebe and Paige."
Despite his promise to himself not to cry, tears began to flow once again. "I'm not worth it…I can't do anything now…I can't help you guys…I don't want to be a burden to everyone."
"Chris, don't ever say that again. You'll never be a burden. Never. No matter what, I'm still going to be proud of you for everything that you've done for this family…and for the world."
Chris was crying openly now and hearing Piper's words only made him cry louder. Piper pulled Chris close to her and held him tight. "I'm so sorry, Mom…for everything over the past month…please forgive me…"
"There's nothing to forgive, Chris…just remember that I love you. We all love you so much."
- to be continued -