Trent had woken up that day about four o'clock to the noise and mess of his room. He didn't know why this disgusted himself every time, for he had woken up to this for years now. Every time he roused from sleep, since before he could remember, he had sat on the edge of his bed and took a few minutes to himself everyday to feel sorry for himself. Trent knew, deep in himself, that he was going nowhere in life and he had gotten himself in this hole. He had chosen the unconventional lifestyle- be a rebel from society and a non-conformist. He was in a band; stayed up all-night and slept all day, drank, partied, and smoked pot. What no one ever realized was that he was miserable. No one realized that Trent knew he was a practical failure in life. But he had chosen this, and only allowed himself a few minutes to mourn a life that could have never happened.
And then Mystik Spiral got signed.
They had simply been at the right place at the right time. Max had gotten them a gig out of town in a city a few towns away form Lawndale. They had heard about this club Black Caveafter a set at the Zen one night, and had tried to get in for a few months. Max had finally gotten the right connection- one of the few times Trent didn't want to punch him- and they went off to play. The set had lasted for a few hours, and the crowd had loved Spiral- much to the bands delight. Lawndale had never been so appreciative to Spiral for their music. Not only was the crowd pleased, but so was an agent who had come to the club for a bit of good music. Neither the agent nor Mystik Spiral knew that by the end of the night that they would be given an offer to go on a Label and record their first album. It had been one of the best moments in Trent's life. Finally, Spiral had been given a chance And so had he.
For the first time in years, Trent had woken up and didn't feel disgusted with himself.
He had made his way slowly into the kitchen to get himself a bite when he remembered they didn't have anything. Mom wasn't home, so maybe she had gone out to buy some groceries. Wait a sec…Mom never buys groceries. Oh yeah, she's in Rome with Dad, I forgot… Trent and Jane usually were the ones to buy the food for the house. That was probably why they never had anything to eat. The only thing around was alcohol, and Trent, for once, didn't feel in the mood. The band had celebrated enough to last him probably for the rest of his life. He sat down and yawned when he saw a note on the table.
Trent- went out for pizza with Jesse. Be back late.
Trent smirked slightly to himself. The band getting signed triggered many revelations and feelings with the members. One was Jesse working up the courage to finally ask Jane out. As a result, they had been dating since, and had been together for about 3 months now- Mystik had been recording for four months now. In fact, he was supposed to go into the studio this evening for practice. He rubbed his temples- despite the fact of their soon to be success, practice was still irritating. He needed a stoic mind for this. Time to bring out the stash.
As he walked back upstairs, Trent's thoughts drifted…
In truth he didn't really like smoking pot. He preferred other means, like talking to Janey or playing his guitar or singing. Back in the day, Trent had always talked to Daria whenever he needed stimulation or stoicism. He still claimed that Daria was the only person that really understood him and how he was. He loved talking to her and being around her, because whenever he did, he didn't feel like a failure, even if it was just for a few minutes. When she had left, he'd felt a great absence and desolation, like he never see her again. Truth was, he cared a lot about her. When all that mess happened with Tom and her, his skin had burned and his blood had boiled as some monster inside him uncoiled and wanted to lash out at him for hurting Daria. Sure, he'd mulled it over with a nonchalant façade, gave he advice when she seemed troubled. But he really wanted to do what that monster inside him was telling him to do. He wanted to lash out. He wanted to protect Daria.
It was obvious that Trent had feelings for her. He'd first realized it when she went with him to find Janey a birthday present, but instead ended up going to the tattoo parlor. He remembered sitting there, holding her hand before she had gotten her naval pierced. She seemed so fragile and fearful, which intrigued him, because he had never seen he like that at all. Her hand had clung to his, fitting almost like a glove, and he had been taken with her. Later, he had spent hours with Monique, breaking up with her because he suddenly realized he liked his sister's best friend a little more than he had known. When he went back to Daria, he had received the vibe immediately- whatever had happened, it was effective. Daria was over Trent, if she ever had had a thing for him to begin with. He knew she had. But it was too late.
Trent had never really gotten over her.
As he sat down in his messy room and took out his pipe to light it, he thought to himself I hate this stuff. This will be my last stash. After this, I'm through.
He had bigger things to pursue.
It was seven by the time he had finished nearly all of his stash and only had a bowl left. Things went quick when you didn't have anyone to smoke with- right now he was feeling a heavy, serene calm come over himself. It was hard to keep his eyes open, a hunger was eating away at him sides but his legs didn't want to get up and go all the way downstairs to get food which wasn't there. He thought about ordering a pizza, but realized his arms were too heavy to lift- plus, the phone was all the way over on the other side of the room. Too far- he'd have to get it later.
Just before he lit his final bowl, he heard a knock on the door and immediately put the pipe behind him underneath the bed. He had just enough time to hide it when the door opened and in walked the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Daria? His mind had told him when he saw her through the haze and his own fogginess. But it couldn't be- Daria was in Chicago at the university. And then he remembered that Janey had gone out with Daria just the day before. He sighed inwardly to himself- the last thing in the world he wanted was for Daria to see him wasted. Especially since, compared to her, pot was never an option. So, he sat up straightened, mustered up all the strength and will power he could and swore to sweep her off her feet with a witty or cool comment and greeting-
"Hey Daria."
Smooth Lane..
"Hey Trent."
He couldn't help but smile to himself at the sight of her. She had always seemed to carry herself with the air of someone who could have cared less what people thought about her, and that had always been attractive to Trent. It really wasn't looks, but the attitude with which one carried oneself that Trent thought was truly beautiful, but even Trent couldn't deny that college had matured Daria's look. She was a sight for sore eyes, in more ways than one.
"Um…Are you burning something?"
Oh god.. The last thing Trent wanted was for Daria to see him toking up. She had- for the most part, he thought- admired him for his authenticity and nonchalant character, but he never would have wanted Daria to see him like this- vulnerable, relying on some material substance to calm his nerves or just use for the hell of it. He knew better. That's why he swore this would be the last time. Truly. God, why couldn't I have quit yesterday instead of choosing today to be the Big Day…So, Trent did the one thing he could think of-
He laughed. Which, of course, inevitable turned into his cough,
"Kinda. Come on, pull up some floor, let's talk."
She complied, sitting across from him on the floor after he cleared an area of his clothes for her to sit, "So Daria, I haven't seen you in a while. Looking for Jane?"
He knew that she had come to Casa Lane for the purpose of Janey- why else would she? IT had been hard not to stand and take Daria into a sweeping embrace…wait. Actually, it wasn't that hard, considering the circumstances. Physically, of course. Mentally, Trent was doing some not-so-innocent things to her right now.
They continued on in seemingly pointless conversation- Trent told Daria that Spiral had gotten signed and relayed the story to her. Every minute that passed however, Daria seemed to be getting..foggier almost. He couldn't help but smile to himself- the haze must had been getting to her. Finally, out of frustration, Daria asked, for the third time, "What is this smoke? It's making me feel funny…"
After sighing inwardly, Trent knew he couldn't avoid it now. After a mental battle, he slowly pulled out the pipe from behind him. It was hard not to laugh at the look that came over Daria's face when she looked at it and asked if it was a pipe pipe- this amused Trent to no end. He had asked if such things offended her, but she had said no…But what completely caught Trent off-guard was when she asked-
"Can I try some of that?"
He had given her a double take, all amusement gone from his face, completely replaced by shock. That was the complete and utter last thing he would have ever expected from her. A small voice in the back of his head yelled this is your lucky day! But he quietly suppressed it. He blinked and looked at her again, incredulously, "What?" he asked bluntly.
"Can I?" she repeated.
Half of him was yelling in protest. The last thing he wanted was Daria to be even near this stuff, let alone smoking it. But the other half was saying his damnable famous saying Relax and see how things go. That, and the almost pleading look on Daria's face was enough to make him crumble. He fumbled around with his words, "Um..uh, have you ever done it?"
She looked embarrassed, "…No.."
She looked down sheepishly. Trent wanted to take her into his arms and protect her, but instead, he said,
"OK."
Daria looked up at him and smiled slightly- sending chill through Trent's body. He scooted over closer to her, bringing out his lighter, half of his mind screaming in protest, the other half cheering.
"Here." He said kindly, "Put this end in your mouth."
She did so, taking the other end in her hand.
"Now breath in when I start to light it."
She nodded, and did so when Trent struck his lighter and neared the flame to the bowl. She sucked in softly, the dank lit up and glowed amber, and they could see the smoke curling up the glass pipe. When the smoke entered her mouth, however, she did not cough, like Trent had when he had his first hit, all those years ago. The screaming half of his mind seemed to quiet as he watched her face intently, almost in awe. What the hell have I gotten myself into?
Daria took her mouth off the end and smoke curled out from her lips. She blinked as her eyes began to water and frowned slightly, "I don't feel anything."
Trent doubled over. It was several minutes until his laughter abated, much to Daria's embarrassment, and he clapped her on the shoulder, "It takes a while, Daria. No, it's ok, I though that too when I first started." He gave her a smile, and it took everything in her to keep from melting.
An hour later, Daria had finished the bowl- and the last of Trent's stash- all by herself. She had started feeling its affects about thirty minutes in, and now, for a lack of a better term, Daria was completely gone.
Trent had watched her with increasing amounts of interest and regret. But, for some odd reason, the interest seemed to have conquered over the regret, for now, this seemed to be the funniest turn of events in the world. Trent himself was pretty wasted, though he had grown used to it over the years of usage, but Daria was…She was acting like a two day old. Everything fascinated her, even the tiniest things- the posters on Trent's walls, the smoke curling around her in the air, even her own fingers. She gazed at everything with awe and wonder, particularly Trent himself, who seemed to be the subject of her fascination right now. Trent didn't care, but something inside tugged at him. Suddenly, Daria gave a loud laugh and laid down on the ground next to him, staring up at him through his crossed arm,
"Trent, this stuff is really weird."
He laughed, and continued to laugh, giggling past the point of humor, till he was laughing about nothing anymore. She joined in with him and his stupid chuckling, until they were both in tears, and Trent had fallen to the ground next to her, his face right next to her knee. "Why haven't I tried this stuff before?" She said, her words becoming strangely articulate, like she was having trouble talking. He sat up and looked down at her, her features now beautifully fascinating and, without pause, he laid down again, his head next to her face, facing her with unblinking eyes. She stared back at him, awe in her own orbs, and she began to chuckle again, "What are you doing Trent?"
"Looking at you."
She blushed very slightly and smiled, her eyes lighting up deliciously, "Why?"
"Just cos. You're really pretty. Like stars, or goldenrods or pixies. Or a new chord, or the smell of fresh paper."
"What are you talking about?"
He smirked, closing his eyes, "Nothing." She giggled again and he sat up, looking around his room. She sat up with him, and when she did, she hugged his arm tightly, closing her eyes. They were silent, until Trent reached down and took his guitar from underneath his bed. He plucked a few strings, taking a moment to tune, before he began the softest and faintest of songs. It tinkled around them, joining the now-abated haze that had once filled the air, hovering above them like a cloud. Daria listened, enraptured with the music, and watched Trent intently. She had never seen him so focused in his life, like the only thing that mattered now was him and his guitar. She liked that about Trent. He loved his music so much…
He played for what it seemed like hours, neither of them moving from their spots, when suddenly, he stopped and put down the guitar- Daria noticed his fingers were bleeding.
"Trent, are you ok?" She asked wearily, like all the energy had been taken from her. He glanced down at his hands and smirked, "Yeah, I'm fine."
Suddenly, shock and disbelief swept over his face, "Oh damn! I forgot, I had practice tonight!"
He sat down under the weight of it all, his eyes closed in exasperation. They were quiet for a long time, until Daria said, "Do…you need to go?"
He glanced up at her and felt his face go slack. There was so much disappointment in her voice, coupled with the look on her face. He smiled slightly at her, "No, it's probably long over by now. It's ok, we can still chill."
"Good."
Her voice had a ring of finality and satisfaction to it, and he couldn't help but smile. Suddenly, Daria blurted, "I'm hungry!" as if it had been the most obvious thing in the world and she had just realized it. Trent burst out laughing, "Sorry, but there's nothing here to eat. We could order a pizza if you want."
Daria nodded vigorously, "I'll pay, too."
Trent shook his head as he dialed a number on his duck phone, "Naw, I got it." She gazed up at him as if he were the most interesting, fascinating thing in the world, and continued to stare until he was done and off the phone and had sat back down on his bed.
"Um…Daria?"
She blinked and snapped out of it, "Sorry."
"S'ok."
They were silent for a long time, until Trent asked, "So Daria, why'd you come here in the first place?"
Daria suddenly went stiff, as if she had remembered something terrible beyond description, and lowered her gaze to the floor, her eyes shadowed from view. She was quiet, and Trent had shrugged it off, until she suddenly said, "Tom. I broke up with Tom. He was cheating on me."
Trent closed his eyes and let his air out in a long, thing stream. When he opened his eyes again, Daria was sitting next to him on the bed, her cheery countenance completely returned as if nothing had happened. Trent smiled, "Screw 'im anyway. He was never good enough for you anyway Daria. 'Sides, I hated seeing him with you anyway."
"Really?" She asked with curiosity, not confusion in her voice.
He nodded, and before his rational mind could stop him, he said, "You know, you are the only one that understands me Daria. Like…you know?"
She nodded and laid her head down on his shoulder, "Yea, I know Trent."
"It's so crazy and cool. You're really cool Daria."
"So're you Trent."
He smiled slightly and laid his head down on top of her own, "You know, sometimes it feels like we've been together- you know, like, together- for like…forever. Like we've always been going out and we know each other so well. Ever feel like that?"
She nodded, breathing in Trent's scent deeply, "Yeah. You know I never got over you?"
"Really?"
She smiled, "Nope. I acted like it, but I never really did. I wanted to be with you so bad. Then Tom…well, Tom was like…reality. You were the dream I could never get. Tom was…well, Tom was what I could get. Guess that's history now."
"So, you never got over me, right?"
"Yeah Trent."
He smiled, "Good." And he bent down and kissed her deeply.
She seemed taken aback, at first, but leaned into him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders as their kiss grew passionate. They fell down onto the bed, laughing, giggling, and holding each other. Trent smiled, burying his face in her hair, "Sorry I never got to do that before."
Daria smiled, "It's ok."
He breathed in the scent of her hair, then kissed her repeatedly, savoring the taste of her mouth, "Daria, do you want the sky? I'd give it to you if you just asked.."
She smirked, "No. You'll do just fine, Trent."
"You know, we should get married."
Daria giggled, "Really?" Trent suddenly sat up, his face alight, "Sure! Feels like we've always been together anyway, so why not? It would be awesome. We could have it by, like…the ocean or something. Mystik could play, and I'll write a song just for you…" He smiled and slipped back down next to her, "I know just how it'll go, too."
"You do?"
He nodded and looked into her face before kissing her softly, more gently than he had ever touched or even thought about touching anyone else before. She wrapped her arms around him, "Trent, I think I love you. I think I've always loved you."
"I love you too Daria. I know- every time I play, I think about you."
To be continued…