Chapter Five:- 'Cheers to England'
Ron took the next mug as Joe passed it and clinked his glass almost leaving Ron with a lap full of cold drink.
"Er, This is how it's done lad. Ya about as doppy as your brother's ain't ya?"
Then he yelled 'cheers' before gulping the entire contents of his own glass down his throat.
"Drink up mate, drinks are on the ouse"
"On the house?" In the first fifteen minutes of Joe's company Ron had endured a detailed explanation on the history, rules of the game and background of every single football player. This commentary was punctuated by Joe taking the time to roar hearty or annoyed comments at the players every minute or two. Fred and George were nowhere in sight, although at one point he could have sworn he saw Fred and George standing watching four men who were jumping around and clucking like ducks…. Then later he saw George chasing after what looked like an over sized turkey.
As he finished his drink he began to relax and soon resigned himself to the company of this muggle, gave up the questions and picked up the next drink placed in front of him as Joe had done, trying to gulp as much down without spilling the stuff all over him. The ale was cool and freshing and he was surprised at how easily the bitter tasting fluid went down his throat. Joe roared in approval and called two more of his buddies over to the table to play, what Joe explained to him, was "a muggle drinking game". Once more he was handed another mug of what these muggles called beer and was taught his next lesson in muggle studies.
It didn't take long before Ron had decided he liked these muggles. Joe was the man that kept passing him drinks, and all he had to do to make Joe happy was drink the beer as fast as he could before Joe had finished his own. At first this was done if England scored a goal, but as the game progressed the rules increased and this was done if a goal was scored by either team, a penalty was awarded, or a member of the opposing team was sent offside.
The game then evolved into something called 'fizzbuzz/apple/parsnip/turnip' where the goal seemed to be to say a word then the name of a vegetable. Speech became increasingly more difficult and generally ended in fits of laughter.
Then all he had to do was shout at the muggles on the screen when everyone else shouted. He was really getting the hang of this. The more he drank of the muggle drink the better he felt. All the worries of Voldermort just disappeared, there was no Voldermort, he wasn't involved in a war against the most evil wizard of all time. He was involved in yelling at the team on the screen. Because if he yelled loud enough with everyone else, they might score a goal and for some reason that was the best feeling in the world. Victor Krum no longer existed, Malfoy was permanently turned into a ferret and life as he knew it was bloody fantastic!
The game ended with much more cheering, hugging and drinking. Ron was unsure as to the reason behind having to saturate himself with so much liquid, but he was fitting in perfectly with the other muggles around him. In fact Ron felt so wonderful about the whole thing he was compelled to rise up on his chair and shout out
"To England" enthralled by the happy shouts his words produced.
Seamus, who until now had been mesmerised by the game, slowly became aware of what has happening around him. He almost fell off his own bar stool in shock as he saw Ron wobbling vicariously on top of a chair, a mug high in his hand yelling
"To England" then proceeding to knock back half the drink, the rest spilling all over him.
"Bloody hell" Seamus gulped. He searched the mass of overexcited and intoxicated fans finally finding a very annoyed looking Fred and George at the back of the pub near the bathrooms. Both were covered in feathers and were in the process of yelling rather angrily at each other.
"This is all your fault! Just what kind of bird feathers did you use? Those are MUGGLE birds! " Fred gestured wildly to what indeed looked like four oversized turkeys sitting in a row against the wall and squawking madly.
"I told you if you use normal bird feather's it's a lot harder to turn them back! Who knows how long it'll last for? And look at what that blasted animal did to my arm!".
"You told me! Your list said BIRD feathers! You didn't specify what kind you great prat!"
"Well what other type would you expect to find in the wizarding world George?" He stopped suddenly, suspicion dawning on his face.
"Where exactly did you get the feathers?"
"It was a feather brained scheme" George told him solemnly, trying desperately to keep his face straight.
"A beastly catastrophe. A bird brained idea"
"George" Fred growled warningly.
"I got the feathers from Mundangas", he admitted finally.
"He said they were a good deal"
"Mundangus thinks that exploding toilet seats are a good idea but you don't see us taking that advice"
"Hey" Seamus yelled finally trying to get their attention.
"Have you seen Ron?"
"Ron's fine. Joe is teaching Ron the finer points of football" Fred answered annoyed as George shot him a dark look.
"Joe is teaching Ron the finer points of getting completely sloshed!" The twin's stared at him in disbelief, moving quickly to find their brother.
"You know if you had of listened when I said not to mix the…"
"Don't start that again" George stopped short as Ron came into view. His mouth opened in surprise as his younger brother stood wobbling on a stool, surrounded by a mass of cheering muggles yelling out 'cheers to England, 'cheers to football' and finally a cheers to 'muggle studies'.
"Huh" Fred stood beside George torn between amusement, concern and what he felt was a slightly sadistic and uncalled for pride.
"So when our little brother came and sort our advice about learning muggle culture…."
"He was serious"
"So it would seem"
"Maybe we should have started off with the basics" Fred raised his eyebrows, shaking his head at the scene.
"It might have been wise to mention that some muggle drinks are more potent then others". George responded.
"I wasn't planning on spending the afternoon watching four men slowly turn into overgrown birds!".
"I told you not to start!".
"Two questions come to mind here. The least important question I can think of at this moment is just who is going to kill us the most for this?".
"It's a toss-up" George moved quickly as Ron suddenly wobbled dangerously and almost crashed to the floor.
"Ron are you ok?"
"Are you kidding" Ron stood up with assistance and grinned as Joe produced another mug for him.
"Look at me! I'm a muggle"
"To muggles" Yelled Joe, completely unaware of what a muggle was, but enjoying the saying, and Ron joined in the cheer with glee…………………
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This was a suggested drinking game suggested to me by 'weaslyless' in their review!
………………………………………. Now on with the story……..