Touch 13

A/N: 13 is my lucky number!

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"I'm not sure this is a good idea." Natalie moved closer to John, looking around her worriedly as they walked down a street that was obviously on the bad side of town.

"I never thought you would be scared of any street in AC." John put his arm around her shoulders and squeezed her comfortingly.

"I'm not scared!" Natalie pushed his arm away. "I lived on this street before I came to Llanview. I'm worried about being recognized."

"Your hair color is different."

Natalie stopped in the middle of the block and put her hands on her hips. "Look at me. Do you not recognize me? Besides, I didn't always have red hair."

"Oh really?" John put his hand on her arm and pulled her back in step with him.

"I used to experiment. You know, I once had green streaks."

"Green?" John put his arm back around Natalie's shoulders. It was part of their cover, he told himself.

"For the Jets."

"You always do root for the underdog, don't you?"

"Yeah. Like us right now."

John couldn't argue with that, but he didn't like it.

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Natalie sat on edge of a sagging, red plush couch in the slovenly living room of John McBain's contact. Informant, she thought more likely. This was the guy who had left them the nondescript Ford Escort near the ferry stop; now apparently he was going to be providing them with fake identification with the photos they had taken a little while ago in front of the white screen.

If she hadn't already been freaked out by the attack on the safe house and Cristian's disappearance, she was definitely edgy now. Just how long did John think they would have to be hiding and who did he think they were hiding from?

Natalie put her head down on the arm of the couch. She already knew the answer to the latter question – the same people who had taken Cristian in the first place and programmed him to kill Antonio and Tico Santi. Another international mob family who would stop at nothing to get what they want. Natalie closed her eyes. Would this ever be over?

"I'm tired," she told herself to explain her maudlin feelings, but it did nothing to dispel the sense of helplessness that was seeping into her bones. How many times was she going to lose her husband? How many times was she going to be pushed further away from John, because now she could admit that her feelings for him eclipsed what she felt for Cristian? Not that she didn't love Cristian, but after all this time her feelings had changed. She had changed.

And John…John had touched her and looked at her with such intensity she knew that his words in his apartment that day had been a lie. He did love her. Still, there was no guarantee that tomorrow, in five minutes or next month he wouldn't deny it all again and pull away. It was like every kiss they shared put more distance between them instead of bringing them closer.

"Hey."

John's whisper woke Natalie up. She opened her eyes and saw John kneeling down in front of her.

"Sorry." Natalie sat up and straightened her clothes.

"Let's get out of here and get some food and sleep."

"Where?" She asked.

"Where else? The Paradise Inn."

"How many hours are we getting?" Natalie's lips twitched with laughter. "Where's your friend?"

"The less he sees the better. Come on, Mrs. Locke."

"Locke? What's my first name?"

"Olivia. I'm your doting husband Charles."

Instead of the laughter he expected, Natalie just looked sad. He didn't say anything until they were buckled in the car and on their way to the famous no-tell motel on the outskirts of Venice Park.

When they were clear of the neighborhood and John was secure they weren't being followed he reach out and put it on Natalie's knee. "You all right?"

Natalie shrugged and pressed her face against the cool glass of her window. "I'm just tired. Worried about Cristian." She tentatively put her hand over his. "Wondering when all this is going to end."

"I'm sorry."

"Pease don't be telling me that this is your fault. I don't have the energy to tell you how much of an idiot you're being."

"Well." John's lips lifted in the ghost of a smile. "As long as you don't have the energy."

Without a word John turned his hand and entwined their fingers.

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"Do you always stay in Room 6?" Natalie asked as she looked around the motel room whose main theme seemed to be red flock circa 1965. "Wow. I always thought this was how it would look."

"Sexy, huh?" John put the bags of food and clothes they had picked up at the nearby strip mall down on the rickety table. It had a faux pink marble top that looked like someone had spilled Pepto Bismol and it hurt his eyes.

"No couch."

"I'll sleep on the floor."

Natalie looked down at the red carpeting, which actually was nearer to brown from years of grime, and then back up at John. "I think you might catch something doing that, in addition to a bad back. We'll survive the bed. I think." She added when she sat down and it dipped ominously.

"Eat then shower?" John asked as he took plugged in the mobile phone charger. His own phone was turned off and sitting on the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean so that they couldn't be tracked through it. Natalie's phone was sitting in a plastic bag on his desk at the station. A shiver ran down his spine as he flashed back to the circumstances leading to his finding it.

"You okay?" Natalie's warm hand on his back brought him back to the present.

"Yeah." He didn't look at her, just continued to unpack their stuff.

"John, where were you just then?"

John's heart was pounding. She hadn't removed her hand and he could feel her soft touch zinging through his entire body.

"I think you should step away for a few minutes." His words were clipped, his voice rough.

Natalie frowned and walked around to face him.

"What's going on with you?" She gasped when he looked up at her. His eyes were dark and burning, his skin still pale.

"John?" Natalie's voice shook.

"Fuck it!" John grabbed her and slid his tongue between her surprised lips. His arm slid around her waist and pulled him against her and he tasted and reveled in her aliveness.

Natalie's arms slid around John's neck as she met his assault. She deliberately rocked her hips against his arousal.

His hold tightened and he began to walk her backwards to the bed. He laid her down, never parting their hungry lips, and crawled up the bed over her. Her legs parted and bent, he lay himself down in between. His hand slid underneath her t-shirt and cupped her breast. Then, needed more, he slid his fingers underneath her bra and kneaded the naked mound.

They moved against each other, fighting to touch and undress each other. Their aroused moans and gasped filled the silence of the room that had seen this all too many times to care.

John took his long-awaited first taste of her straining nipple. Natalie threw her head back and pressed him tighter. As he nipped and suckled, his other hand pushed her shorts down her legs and pressed over her wetness, then slid them aside to push his fingers inside.

Natalie came undone; she moved urgently up against him, the sensations too much to bear. John silenced her with his lips as he pushed her over the edge.

A few minutes later John was cradling Natalie against his shoulder, both of them basking in the aftermath and working on getting their heartbeats and breathing under control.

Natalie eventually looked up at him. "What about you?" she asked quietly.

"It's all right." He pushed now-dark brown hair off her face and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"But."

"Shhh." John interrupted. Could he tell her why he had done that? How he couldn't resist touching her, even though her husband was possibly out there still alive? How he couldn't bear for her to touch him before they had discussed his part in keeping her in the dark about the DNA results?

"You said you would answer anything I asked."

John took a deep breath and pressed his forehead on the top of her head. He just wanted to hold her just a little longer, but he had promised. He started to move away, but she grabbed his face in her hand.

"You are not going to tell me that this didn't mean anything!"

"It meant everything."

His solemn promise brought tears to Natalie's eyes. "Can we just stay like this a bit longer?" she asked.

He nodded and pulled the blanket over them.