Disclaimer: Own nothing
"Why do I have to hold the carrot stick?" Pippin complained as the two rode unceremoniously on top of the large black stallion. Pippin was dangling a large carrot in front of the horse and the horse was riding fast trying to get at the carrot but never succeeding. This was the only way they could have coaxed the horse to move.
They were off to farmer Maggot's.
"Pippin, how many times do I have to explain myself?" Merry said, while munching on a carrot himself. Pippin held up one palm in defense, and sighed irritatedly (is that a word?).
"Never mind... I'm tired of the same answer... In the end it's always "If not for me, then do it for the mushrooms Pip." " Merry allowed a suppressed smirk to come across his face as he listened to the ramblings of his best friend. But as soon as the smirk appeared, it disappeared.
What he saw on the road ahead of him made him lose all trace of amusement that was replaced with a bone chilling fear. He could see a cloaked black figure, about the height of a grown Man, had just crossed the road in front of them. That couldn't be however since the King had banned all Men from entering the Shire.
Maybe its one of the Nazgul, maybe the ring wasn't completely destroyed, maybe he wants its horse back...the same horse they were currently riding. Maybe he had come to find it. All these thoughts were running a mile a minute inside Merry's head. Pippin still hadn't realized what was happening and was still rambling. Merry nudged him quickly in the back and urged him to shut up warning him of the man.
"Ow! Merry! That hurt! Don't you remember that's where that scarecrow fell on my 3 days ago? Of all hobbits, I would've thought that you..." Silence overcame Pippin as chill ran down his spine. The hazel (I'm not sure if that's his eye color) eyed hobbit dared to look at the path ahead of him, and what he saw made him accidentally drop the carrot stick. It was horrible. Worse than that! It was, IT WAS...
"Hay guysss!" slurred the mighty King of Gondor and Arnor, "oooh pretty carrot." With that the drunken King picked up the carrot Pippin had dropped and started eating it. The horse had come to a complete standstill and was snorting mad that this drunken Man had gotten to the carrot he had been chasing.
Both Hobbits couldn't believe what they were seeing! The supposed (insert adjective) King of Gondor was drunk, AND eating a carrot... that had fallen on the ground... how unkingly!
The King was sniggering now. He seemed to think something was very funny. He kept going on until Merry finally asked him what exactly was so funny.
"You see that tree over there? Hehehe...that pear tree?" the king asked sniggering, "Those pears look just like Arwen! Hehehehehe...ROUND!" He was in absolute hysterics now.
"Although...although I bet those pears don't have a temper like her...or mood swings!" slurred the king.
Merry looked at the King quizzically as he slowly dismounted the horse.
"Are you saying Arwen's fat?" asked Pippin curiously from the horse.
"Pippin! Try to be more tactful," replied Merry reproachfully. He was now trying to get Aragorn to stop laughing.
"Fat isn't it my dear Pip pip pip" replied Aragorn quite eccentrically, "No no, its my fault. I got her pregnant. She-Elves are bloomin' MAD when they're pregnant, oh why didn't I go with Eowyn? This one is making me insane" mumbled the drunken (and miserable) king.
"I'm going to be an uncle?" yelled Pippin, he accidentally kicked the horse that he was still mounted on and the horse took off with top speed rushing down the road.
"Pippin you idiot!" yelled Merry after him.
Please Read and review