For some reason I don't really like this chapter…but you should still review. And again thank Amanda for making me update lol…alright here it is…

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi or any of the characters…even though I do wish I owned Mike Lobel…lol j/k…

(Jay's Point Of View)

I woke up with possibly one of the worst hangovers I've ever had. My head was pounding and I was really hungry. The events of yesterday ran through my head again and I had to hold myself back from crying. I remembered that I still had to go get my car from Ellie and Sean and be at the hospital by 11:30 to meet Patty. I swung my feet over the bed and stepped out. I noticed a bottle of half empty vodka sitting on my floor. I knew I shouldn't have but I reached over and grabbed it, I took a couple of long sips and let the liquid run down the back of my throat, it burned but it felt good. The alcohol gave me a little buzz and I left the room. The walk to Ellie and Sean's house didn't take that long only maybe 15 minutes. When I got there Ellie was in the living room watching TV and Sean was in the shower. I stumbled into the house, really feeling the effect of the vodka now.

"Jay are you fucking drunk?" I just sort of turned my head to the side and thought about her question. When I didn't answer I guess she took it as a yes. "What the hell are you doing Jay? You need to grow the hell up. Your little girl is in the hospital she needs a father not some drunk bastard. Clean yourself up…you can stay here if you want and when Layla is out of the hospital you can stay here with her too." Ellie was one of the kindest people I think I've ever known. She's always given to other people instead of worrying about herself.

"El I don't want to be a burden on you and Sean with your baby being born in a couple of months." She gave me a typical Ellie looked that said 'if you don't stay here I'm going to force you'. "Alright fine…but let me know if you want me to leave, I can probably afford a small apartment if I have to." Even in my drunken state I could still think somewhat clearly enough to get my point across.

"Okay then we have a deal. I was about to head over to the hospital to go visit Layla…are you going too?" I nodded my head and she tossed my keys to the civic at me. We drove there and I noticed that it was a little later then I was intending to be there but I had hoped that Patty was still there. And just like I thought she was, she was sitting in the room when we walked in.

"Hey Jay…Is this Emma?" I guess that Alex hadn't told her mom that me and Emma weren't together any more and I guess she never told her mom what Ellie looked like because the look on her mom's face right now was pure hatred.

"No Patty this was one of Alex's best friends Ellie. Patty – Ellie, Ellie this is Patty, Alex's mom" I saw the look in Patty's eyes soften as she realized that it wasn't who she thought it was. "Come on guys let's go see the baby." I went to the front desk and the nurse there recognized me and said I could go back, she also said that they were allowed too. When we got in there I saw that Layla was awake and she was just looking around the room. She was only a day old and already so curious. "Hey baby" I said lightly picking her up.

"Jay she's beautiful." I saw Patty wipe tears from her eyes and I knew this must have been hard for her. She had lost Alex and I know they had finally gotten close over the last couple months. "She looks like a perfect mix of you and Alex. Can I…hold her?" I passed her over and watched as Patty's eyes lit up when she held her. "Hey Layla, I'm your grandma. You really are beautiful. Just like your mommy. You've got a great daddy too and he's gonna take great care of you." I grabbed Ellie's arm and we quietly walked out of the room so we could leave Patty alone with her.

"So that's Alex's mom?" Ellie and me walked to the cafeteria and I bought us some food. I nodded my head… "They do look a lot alike." We sat in silence for a few moments before Ellie spoke up. "I know that we've never been that close Jay. But I want you to know that I'm here for you if you ever need me…"

"Thanks El, that does mean a lot to me." And again we sat in silence for a while but this time I was the first one to speak. "Maybe we should go up and check on Patty and Layla, she's been up there for about a half an hour or so" As we made our way up to the room we walked in silence. I just didn't know what I was suppose to say to her, I was afraid to bring up anything about Alex for fearing that I might start to cry, and I didn't really know much about her besides that she's been with Sean for a long time and that she was best friends with Alex. I didn't really notice it till now but it seemed like I didn't know much about Ellie and Sean didn't know but about Alex…but our girlfriends were best friends (okay so in my case it wasn't girlfriend but still). I wonder why I never really took the time to get to know Ellie and Sean didn't try to get to know Alex. It wasn't until then did I realize that my buzz from my vodka that morning had worn off…but I was fine with that.

"Hey…" I said as we walked in, Patty quickly hushed me and said Layla was sleeping. "sorry" I whispered. "How are you doing?"

"I'm not doing that bad…I made arrangements to meet with the funeral home later today. You stay here I'll take care of all that stuff, stay here with your daughter." She got up and kissed me on my cheek before walking out. "bye Ellie. It was nice to meet you. I hope that I'll see you in the future." And with that she walked out. I had really wanted to go with her to the funeral home but I was to scared too…I watched as Ellie held Layla for a little while but then she said she had to go home so I was there…alone…just like before.

"Layla Hogart…I think it's missing something sweetheart." Whenever I held her she always seemed to open her eyes or do something of that nature, like open her mouth up. "How about Layla Alexandria Hogart? How does that sound?" I waited for her to do something that would make sure she liked it, as crazy as it may sound I was going to see how she would react. She opened her mouth up and it almost looked like a smile. "I'll take it that you like that name. Now you'll always have a piece of your mommy with you. I love you Layla Alexandria Hogart" I spent the whole afternoon there and I was very surprised when Patty came back.

"Hey Jay. I got everything set up…the funeral will be in four days. I got a deal with the funeral director, he gave me 25 off because he felt bad for me. But anyway…I want you to tell all of Alex's friends to please be there okay Jay?" I nodded my head because just talking about the funeral got me upset. "I have go home before Chad is there but I'll talk to you tomorrow" I watched her walk out and I turned my attention back to Layla…

"you know you have an amazing grandma…I can tell that she misses your mommy but don't worry she'll always been here for you too. You have me, Sean, Ellie, and your Grandma…we all love you so much…" I cradled her in my arms and cried. I was interrupted by the doctor though…

"Hey Jay…I just wanted to let you know that you can probably take her home tomorrow. And I'm sorry about your girlfriend…" he gave me a sympathetic look and walked out.

"Hey baby…you'll be able to come home and live with me, Sean and Ellie now…I can't wait. I'm sorry but I have to go to work but I'll come get you tomorrow and take you home…I love you" I gently laid her back down and left the hospital…I couldn't wait until tomorrow…

review…please?

…Taryn…