Chapter 3- When witches try to help... there's always trouble to come
"What that hell are you doing here?" Buffy said, covering herself up.
"I had to talk to ya. I knew that you wouldn't come by and see me."
"I have good reason to. Now will you please leave?"
"Nope. See I have ya slayer. You aren't going to get up so you'll just there and listen to what I have to say." Spike smiled at her.
Buffy didn't want to talk to Spike. But she didn't care if she had to listen to him. "Fine. What do you have to say Spike?"
Spike looked right at her. "I'm sorry." He waited for to her respond. When she didn't he decided to go on. "Look slayer I'm not going to lie to ya anymore. I'm not going to act like I don't care. You want to know the truth about all this? I can't tell you what's going on or how I feel about ya. All I can tell ya is that I care about ya. That's the best that I can do for now." He got up and walked out the door.
Buffy yelled at him. "Stop."
Spike reemerged at her door. "Yeah Slayer."
"I'm confused to. But I do care about you." Spike smiled and walked out the door.
The Park-
Willow and Buffy were walking in a park. The sun was shining and Buffy was smiling. It had been such a long time since Buffy had spent any time alone with Willow. She was finally happy to talk to someone who would listen to her. "I feel so confused."
"About what? Riley?"
"No."
Willow stopped and looked at her. "Do you have a new love interest that I don't know about?"
"No." Buffy said sitting down. "At least I don't think so."
Willow gave her a confused look. "What do you mean?"
Buffy looked a little uneasy. "Will you promise not to freak out and not to tell anyone?"
"Of course Buffy." Willow said as she sat down.
"All right." Buffy let out a deep breath. "There's more to that night with Spike then I told you about."
"What? Did he hurt you?" Willow said, becoming mad.
Buffy placed a hand on Willow's knee, a friendly gesture to calm her. "No. He can't remember?"
"Right." Willow said, looking embarrassed.
"Although you might wish he had after I tell you this."
"Come on Buffy. I am your best friend, there is nothing that you can't tell me." Willow said reassuring her.
Buffy sighed. "Spike leaned into kiss me at one point. I back away, asked him what the hell he was doing. Then he said 'come on, I can feel it slayer. You know you want to dance'. I was a little bit shocked.
Willow's eyes had been wide since she said Spike had tried to kiss her. "What did you say?"
"I told him that I couldn't. Then I threw the money and went to leave. But I found myself turning around and then having him face me. I told him that I couldn't give up that easily."
"You mean that you would give up to him?" Willow said, shocked.
Buffy looked at her. "You promised not to freak and not to say anything. But I am no where near done. He walked towards me until he had me pinned against the wall. He said 'That doesn't mean you don't want to'. I knew then that he wanted me to admit that I wanted to, maybe even to admit that I wanted him."
"Do or did you?" Willow asked.
"Want him?" Buffy asked in response to the question. Willow nodded. "Yes, I guess I do. So I admitted that I wanted to but I knew that I couldn't. He told me that was all he needed and he left. Any other day I would have ran after him and beat him until he forgot or swore that he would not tell of my confession. Instead I just let him go."
"So you want Spike?" Willow said in shock.
"Yes. I could feel the lust between us, I didn't need to deny that I couldn't feel it. He could tell that I could. Anyways that day that I told you guys about what Spike had said, or at least the much needed edited version, all I could think about was him. His words kept replaying in my head and nothing I could do would make them stop. It was strange. That day was the first time that my eyes where open and I really saw how wrong Riley was for me. That night at the Magic Shop, when I left to patrol, Spike was waiting for me. I asked him what he wanted and he asked me if I wanted to dance. We fought two vampires, but he dusted his first to watch me fight. After that we talked a for a little while then I asked him something that I guess I should regret."
Willow was intrigued by now. "What?"
"I asked him if this was how it was going to be for us. He didn't know what I meant. So I explained saying that we were hiding behind a mask of false hate, pretending that we can't stand each other, lying to ourselves when we around others."
"You don't have to lie around me." Willow said in defense. Buffy shot her a look. "Okay so maybe I would have been judgmental, but not if you tell me like this. Anyways continue."
"Okay." Buffy said. "So I told him that I didn't mean what I said about Harmony. He just said that I did. I was upset by then from what he had said. I didn't like having to lie about how I felt about him. I'd rather you guys think that I liked him then hate him, cause I am no where near hating him. When Riley left he found me in the graveyard. Or rather I ran into him. And pretty soon I was telling him that it wasn't who was leaving, but rather it was that he was leaving. That I was sick of the people leaving when things get tough. He told me that they couldn't handle me and that they didn't deserve me if they could leave. It may be one of the sweetest things anyone had ever said to me. But I still told him goodnight coldly and walked away. I didn't know how to handle how I felt when he said all those nice things to cheer me up. I just couldn't deal with it."
"Go on." Willow said, more wrapped up in the story then before.
"After several weeks of not seeing him I ran into him again. I asked him coldly what he wanted, determined not to let him get under my skin again. He got up close and asked me what was going on with me. I said it was quiet and there was nothing for me in the graveyard. I didn't mean to hurt him, I didn't even think about it until he mumbled to go back to the Bronze, that there was nothing there for me. The way he mumbled it and the way he just walked away and into his crypt, it was different. He had honestly been hurt that I hadn't come to see him. So I did the only thing I knew how to do when Spike was hiding something from me. I went into his crypt, grabbed him by the neck and slammed him against the wall. I asked him what the hell his problem was, since he was being as ass to me since Riley left. He said that he was just stating a fact. I asked him when he had the right to judge my life. He finally admitted that he was just trying to cheer me up, although I knew that he meant what he had said. So I broke down crying, saying that I knew it and I thought about it. I knew I had no one."
"But you..."
Buffy cut Willow off. "He said I had you guys, my family. I knew that but I meant someone that I could love for the rest of my life. I had no guy like that, who I could love and who would love me for the rest of our lives. Then Spike said something that cut me to the bone and it creeps me out to think about it. He told me that I wasn't looking in the right place. I wasn't normal and I shouldn't try to be."
"But you are normal." Willow said.
"I'm not. How many girls our age do you know that spend most of their time in a graveyard? Or that could beat any boy in a fight that ever came anywhere near her?"
Willow looked down. "I know. But that's something that you can't help. Other then that you are normal."
"But that is a huge part of my life Will. I have you guys, it makes me fit in somewhere. But when it comes down to it, I am still way weirder then you."
"Lesbian Witch." Willow said pointing to herself.
"Vampire loving slayer." Buffy said.
Willow laughed. "Got me beat. Keep going, what did you say?"
"He said that Angel had left me because he wanted me to have a normal life, but that wasn't part of my job. I was freaked. First he meant was he was saying, not just to cheer me up. And second he was the first person to call it a job. Everyone else sees it as a destiny. So then he kissed me."
"WHAT!" Willow yelled.
Buffy shot her a look. "You said you wouldn't freak."
"That was before you told me that Spike kissed you."
"Be quiet." Buffy said, casting glances to make sure that no one they knew was near them. "I ran away after his lip touched mine. I was freaked. But what's worse is when I woke up, he was in my room, asleep in the chair."
"Are you serious?" Willow said. "What did he want?"
"To tell me that he had crypto-feelings too. But that he cared. So I told him the feeling was mutual."
"You're serious?" Willow said. Buffy looked at her with a face that screamed being serious. "Wow." Willow said. "Wow. Spike kissed you and know you're saying that you might like him. You know as in leading to where things went with Angel?"
"I don't know." Buffy said. "I don't think I could ever fall in love with Spike. He doesn't have a soul and that chip ever came out he would kill me."
"But you could like him? You could be with him?" Willow said, slightly freaked out.
"Yes. I could." Buffy said, extremely serious. "I don't know what to do Willow." Buffy said, suddenly in tears. She laid her head down on the witch's lap.
Willow stroked Buffy's hair as the slayer cried on her lap. She felt bad for her. After everything that had happened with Angel, she wanted a normal guy. Willow really thought that she had a chance with Riley. But the more and more she saw that they weren't right. But Spike? Spike was everything that Angel wasn't. He was evil, he was mean, he was a smart-ass. But he loved, that was for sure. She had been there when he cried over Drucilla and stole both her and Xander to do the love spell. She saw first hand that he could love and, although she hated to admit it, she saw that he loved Buffy. "He can love you." She said, causing Buffy to sit up.
Buffy looked at Willow after her random comment. "What?"
"He can love. He did before with Drucilla, remember me with the love spell. I saw how much he loved her and how he would do anything for her, like come back here. And I can tell that he loves you."
"Are you saying..." Buffy looked shocked.
"I'm not saying anything. And if anyone asks I know nothing."
Buffy looked at her and hugged her. "Thank you Will."
"Hey no problem. Now I want to go see Tara. I have this feeling that she needs to know how I feel."
"Then go tell her girl." Buffy said. She watched as Willow ran off to find her lover. Buffy smiled as the sun shined down on her. It was nice, but Buffy knew that she didn't belong to the light.
Tara's Dorm-
Willow walked in and grabbed her lover into a hug. "Hello." She said to Tara.
Tara smiled at her. "Hi. What's going on?"
"I love you. If you didn't know that before I am telling you now. I love you." Willow said with a smile.
Tara was smiling, the happiest that she had ever been. "I love you too." Willow kissed her lover. After several minutes of making out she told her lover something. "We need to do a spell."
"What kind of spell?" Her lover asked, seeing the intensity in the red-head's eyes.
"A spell to make two people see what they truly feel. To help them see that what they want." Willow said with a smile.
Spike's Crypt-
Buffy knocked this time and walked in when he answered the door. It was weird between them and they both felt it. She looked at him and couldn't speak. It was as if she was seeing him for the first time. He was handsome and he looked at her with caring eyes. She had never noticed before. "Hi." She said.
"What do you want slayer?" He said coldly.
She knew it was out of habit, the way that he talked to her. She saw how he felt sorry after he said it. But she smiled at him and looked him dead in the eye. "You want to dance?" His eyes lit up.
Both of them fought the vampires as if their life depended on it. They were both intent on the battle, each one feeling the passion and heat from the other as they fought.
Back at Tara's-
Willow and Tara were chanting something. Willow had a picture of Buffy and a makeshift doll of Spike, a black leather jacket and some white yarn for hair. It had a smiley face with fangs on it. Both Tara and Willow were chanting as a blue light came and surrounded them and the images of Buffy and Spike.
The graveyard-
Both had successfully staked their vampires. But before they knew what was going on, a blue light surrounded them and knocked them down. Spike was the first to recover and he walked over to help Buffy up. Her head was bleeding a little so he lead her to the crypt and got bandages for her head. He felt a little weird, but he let it slide as he bandaged Buffy up. When he was done he went to walk way but she grabbed his arm. She stood up as he turned to her. "What slayer? I'm sorry for helpin' ya. I know all to well how bad ya take it when someone tries to help ya. Or maybe it's just me..."
"Shut up Spike." She said interrupting him. He looked at her strangely. She leaned in and kissed him. It wasn't like the other kiss. This kiss was filled with passion. Spike wrapped his arms around her, letting her search his mouth with her tongue. She tasted great, more then he ever imagined. He became wrapped up in her kiss, so much that he almost forgot to think about why she was kissing him.
He broke away from the kiss and instantly missed her mouth on his. He backed away more, the temptation to continue that kiss was far to great if they were close. "What's going on slayer?"
"I don't know. It might be a spell, you know the blue light." She said breathless.
His head sunk low. Of course it was a spell. She may have admitted to caring for him, but to like him or dare he say love him was asking to much. "Right slayer. So who would put a spell on ya to make you kiss me?"
"Willow." Buffy said with a little bit of anger in her eyes.
"Why would Red..." He was cut off by Buffy grabbing his hand and dragging him out the door.
The dorm-
Buffy and Spike charged into the room just after Tara and Willow had put the last of the spell stuff away. "I told you this was a bad idea." Tara said.
Buffy walked right over to Willow. "Reverse what you did." She said sternly.
"I still don't see what Red's got to do with you..." He stopped. He didn't know if Buffy wanted everyone to know about what had been going on. "Getting hurt." He said, hoping that the two would see the bandage on her head.
"Reverse it Willow." Buffy said.
"I can't." Willow said calmly. "It has not way to be reversed."
Spike looked shocked. "What did you do to us?"
"It's a spell that lets you see what you want." Tara said. "What you desire."
"What you truly feel." Willow said. She looked from Buffy to Spike. "And it has to wear off. You got until the sun sets in..." She looked at the clock. "Five hours. You have five hours to say what you want you feel or do what you feel and then be able to blame it on me and my troublesome spells. Now get out, me and Tara would like to be left alone." She looked at Tara with lust in her eyes. Buffy grabbed Spike again and they left.
Spike's Crypt-
The both fell through the door kissing. Buffy pushed his jacket off his shoulders and kissed him harder. He reached down and broke away long enough to take her shirt off. She removed his and then kissed his chest, moving back up to his neck and then back to his lips. Both fell into his bed.
Many times I've tried to tell you
Many times I've cried alone
Always I'm surprised how well you
Cut my feelings to the bone
Don't want to leave you really
I've invested too much time
To give you up that easy
To the doubts that complicate your mind
The dorm-
Willow walked over to the bed that Tara was laying in and kissed her. She sat up and let Tara remove her top. They kissed again.
We Belong to the light
We Belong to the thunder
We Belong to the sound of the words
We've both fallen under
Whatever we deny or embrace
For worse or for better
We Belong, We Belong
We Belong together
Spike's Crypt-
Spike kissed Buffy's neck and then moved up to her lips where he kissed her passionately. She smiled and flipped him over until she was on top of him. She trailed kisses down his chest and up to his neck.
Maybe it's a sign of weakness
When I don't know what to say
Maybe I just wouldn't know
What to do with my strength anyway
Have we become a habit
Do we distort the facts
Now there's no looking forward
Now there's no turning back
When you say
From the shadow of the crypt someone watched the two. He was raging mad, not knowing of the spell and not caring. He held himself back as he watched Spike and Buffy kiss. He walked away when they were completely naked. He knew that there was no way he could hold himself back if he saw Buffy writhing under Spike.
We Belong to the light
We Belong to the thunder
We Belong to the sound of the words
We've both fallen under
Whatever we deny or embrace
For worse or for better
We Belong, We Belong
We Belong together
The dorm-
Willow and Tara had fallen asleep in each other's arms. The moon shined on them from a window, making both seem like Angel's.
Spike's crypt-
Buffy lay in Spike's arms. He sat there watching her sleep, knowing that when she awoke at dawn she would leave. He knew that without the spell she would have never slept with him. And he couldn't bare it that dawn was coming.
Close your eyes and try to sleep now
Close your eyes and try to dream
Clear your mind and do your best
To try and wash the palette clean
We can't begin to know it
How much we really care
I hear your voice inside me
I see your face everywhere
Still you say
The dorm-
There was a faint knock on the door. Willow, who had always been a light sleeper, heard it. She got up silently, careful not to wake her lover. She opened the door and gasped. Tara shot up in her bed, but she didn't know what was going on. Willow looked at the man in her door. "Angel!" She said shocked.
Spike's crypt-
Spike had finally fallen asleep with Buffy in his arms. They both slept soundly, neither one ready for what was to come. Neither one was prepared for the consequences of the spell or the brooding vampire that came to town with horrible news.
We Belong to the light
We Belong to the thunder
We Belong to the sound of the words
We've both fallen under
Whatever we deny or embrace
For worse or for better
We Belong, We Belong
We Belong together
A/N:
The song is We Belong by Pat Benatar. There is going to be a few more songs in this story including; Def Leppard, Motley Crue, Poison, and Lita Ford. I know that's a lot, but I feel that songs are a great way to express emotion. The only thing that I would change about this song was to change it to We Belong to the darkness... it would be more Spuffy. But I couldn't change the song so I left it as is.