Mother would be very unhappy with these circumstances. I strayed as far from the path as I could; I ate all the sweets for Granny; I killed; I tore my dress…. And, yet I feel no remorse. It does not bother me that I aided in the murder of soul. That I lied to someone; that I watched her die. That I didn't try to stop it… I feel nothing except extreme relief. Relief that while I was safe, someone else was in agonizing pain. That she felt what we were all feeling. She did loose her husband… that should have been enough. We killed him; no... Jack did. Then she came for him. She took her revenge on us – not purposely… but she did. Is it to be an on going cycle that never ends? Are we to have another Giant that comes set on destroying more of us and, then, we're to slay it too?
Perhaps that Witch was right. I'm not squeamish. I may not have killed that wolf, Mr. Baker did; but I skinned him… I enjoyed it. I longed to do it again. And I did. I carved them up, never giving a thought to what I was doing. Never thinking about how I was killing someone. Never thinking about the wolf's mother… I was wrong. It is the same, they both feel loss. Human… Wolf… Giant… They have those who they love, who they take care of, who they depend on and who depends on them. Their lives revolve around one another; doesn't matter who or what species. Perhaps no one is alone but, there are a lot of broken families around, because of me
Mother wouldn't be pleased at all. Not of me, her murdering daughter. I openly lied so that I could live another day. I do suppose that Mother would have understood with that last one… No. No, Mother wasn't like that. Mother was strict. She expected me to do as I was told. Not to dirty my dress; to stay on task; she expected me to be perfect, like her.
But here I am, looking as if I went to the underworld and back. Yet, I couldn't be happier. I'm with others, who feel the same guilt, loss, sadness as I do. They no longer have their families and neither do I. Perhaps this was my wish all along. Perhaps this is what they wolf wanted to show me. I was traveling fleetly; not taking the time to enjoy the flowers or the birds, who sing sweetly. Maybe a Baker and his son, a boy who loved a cow and a princess weren't exactly what he had in mind, but they'll do.
For this, I'd like to thank my Ashley – for bullying me into updating. Okay, she begged really hard. She's excited about it. This is for you, Honey.