The Festival and the Ball; it was always my dream to go to either one. To go to both was my wish. Oh and what a Ball it was. Women, in their finest attire, were dancing with the men. The men were being gentle and kind to the ones around them; everyone using manner and being so courteous. For once I was treated like an equal – not like at home where I was sneered upon. I danced like I was on a cloud. I was in the arms of a prince… my prince. I felt invincible; untouchable. Then he chose me to become his bride. Sure, I was a little leery – I had just met the man three days prior and, I never thought I'd wed a prince. But I did. For one year, I was a princess… for one year, I was loved.
For that one year, I forgot who I was. I became wrapped up in the glorious silken robes, the stewards that were there to do my every bidding, the castle that I never had to clean. I forgot about everything. I forgot about my mother and her grave. The tree that my tears water, causing it to grow into the handsome tree that it was, it all left my mind. When the birds told me that there was trouble at her grave I cried enough tears to grow a whole forest. What were the chances that my tree – Mother's tree – would be what destroyed her grave? That the birds, who I discarded, would be who told me about it. And after that, they even agreed to help me and my new friends with the Giant. Good friends are hard to find. They're hard to hold on to, too. I suppose that if they didn't tell me, I would never have known about her grave. I would have left with the rest of the family and never looked back.
Mother could never guide me; I was always on my own. No one was beside me; unless you want to count my stepfamily and my father, criticizing me on how I looked and how I dressed. I was so happy to be away from them, to be with others who valued me. Until, I realized that I was at fault. The village's baker, he was one of the few in the group. He had lost his wife – a giant tree fell upon her, much like Mother's grave, it was the Giant's doings. It was my fault, I did pin it on Jack; he had gone back up again. I called him greedy, I was greedy. I wanted my soul untainted. I didn't want someone to pin a death on me; but on a little child, that was fine? If I hadn't thrown away the bean in the first place we wouldn't have had that mess. Who knows what might have happened differently. Maybe I would have died and the rest of the village could have lived. That would have been better, right? The second giant was my fault – I should have died for it. It's what a nobler person would have done.
So, I suppose that that makes me selfish. I run off (Tra, la, la, la, la) while my kingdom is left defenseless against the Giantess. That is some world class cowardice. Sure, it's the prince's duty to protect the kingdom but when he isn't there it's up to me. If I leave – I'm supposed to get someone to be in charge in my absence. I snuck out – no one knew I was gone – they all thought that I was still there; thinking how to save them. They didn't know. They were oblivious, blissful villagers – and I was once one of them. I still am. I couldn't tell that my own husband was having an affair. Who knows how long it was going on for. I suppose that in my eyes, he was still a prince. Perfect in everyway; the sun rose and set on him; incapable of doing wrong. I was wrong. He's human. He does bad things, like we all do.
Why was that so hard for me to understand? Why is it so hard for me to think of the man who rescued me as faulted? Perhaps it's because I am. Maybe that's another one of my faults, I expect too much from people. My parents expected a lot from me. Maybe it's because other around me always hold themselves in the highest ranks. Yet, I'm with the villager's baker and three kids, although two are much too old to be labeled as such, form the village as well, and… he's faulted. I see that. I know that. Yet, he seems perfect. Each and every fault of his adds to him as a whole and it doesn't take away from it, like I was told mine did. Jack, who I pinned the blame on, wants me to stay with them. Perhaps it's because we're all faulted, we're all to blame. Not anyone of us, no one can hold that burden by themselves. Together… we can look past it. So should I stay with them? Before I wondered how do you know what you want, 'till you know who you are… I may still not know just who I am, but I know that I'll be happy with them. Happier then any Ball could ever make me
What to say? It's sunny, cloudless, and hot out... I want some rain