Maybe I just wasn't meant to have children.
Maybe I just wasn't meant to have a husband either. It's not that I didn't love him; I did and I do, with all my heart. I was always a romantic; believing that everyone had their special somebody; that there was a prince for everyone. One who would come and whisk them away... I suppose that mine didn't work out that way. I found a prince in the woods, and he was everything a prince should be; sensitive, clever, well-mannered, considerate, passionate, charming, as kind as he's handsome... and a cad. He used me. He found me in the woods when I was at a low, when I felt as if my husband didn't care. He knew that, somehow, and he took advantage of that. He had his fun and then he ran off, claiming that he had to protect us from the Giant – the very one that was the cause of my death.
Oh, but I did find my Prince in the woods. He may not have been royalty or the smartest man, nor did he have the best temper. But he was everything to me. He made me happy, and at times he made me mad, but it was who he was. His crown was a chef's hat and his robe was really an apron. Maybe he didn't have riches, I didn't need that. I needed to be loved. I wanted to be loved. I wanted to give love... I had a child I could do that to. He got on every one of my nerves, too. Never stopped crying; not stopped yelling; never stopped me from loving him. As bad as he was you couldn't help but love him. I hope he'll give his father an easy time.
I wish I could see him again. Hold him in my arms, console him, sooth him, rock him to sleep. He's my child. I want him with me – badly. Jealousy is a petty thing. Petty, yet powerful; it's leads us to do things that we know are wrong. Like my Love, he nearly left. Swore our son to the princess, ran from the group... Thank heavens for his father. They may have started their bonding late but, it's far better then never. I owe so much to that man, not only did he help us get our child... but he helped my husband see his wrong. He helped him know what was best. He can grieve for me all that he wants but if he wants to avenge me then he'll raise our son as I would have. He will not run amuck and hope for the best... he knows better then that.
So with a gust of the wind, I'll send them my love and hope that it gets carried to them. It's all I have left, now. My body is useless and life is ended. I can't guide my child, but he will see the glow of my love
Thanks goes out to Chimalmaht who reviewed last night - it reminded me that I should really update this.