Chapter twenty

After Robin had left, Raven had some time to think. The words of the others were floating around in her head like miniature balloons, popping with vocal thought. She tried to push them away, so that she could think for herself.

Eventually, she succeeded. What did she think, really? Was she angry? Sad? Frustrated?

The torture inside of her was raging, for sure. Pushing herself to her feet, as if her cloak were made of lead, she dragged herself into the hospital ward once more. The door was closed and she peered through the glass, pausing for a moment. He was still there, steadily breathing, his eyes firmly shut.

She took a deep breath and pushed the door open hearing the machinery whirring once more. Without the others in here it didn't seem so real. It seemed like one of those many nightmares she'd had in the mountains.

At least five times a week she'd wake up screaming – imagining his death, and her feelings. Sometimes they were of sadness for him and for herself, but mostly they were of regret. Regret that she had never told him when there was a possibility to do so.

She'd tried so many times. But how could someone like her ever truly show she cared? Especially now, after everything that had happened. There was no remedy but to face the problem and see it through.

She might be nothing else, but she was Beast boy's friend, and she intended to be here when he woke up. He needed her support now more than ever. He was in trouble. Those memorable song lyrics popped into her head suddenly and she remembered the kiss once more.

Sighing, she sat down on the chair next to his bed and rested her hand on the blanket. She looked at the other hand that was resting there, and bit her lip, deliberating whether to do what her heart told her.

She reached out and pressed her fingers around his and squeezed tightly. Giving a smile, and allowing a tear to work it's way once more down to her chin she blinked, until Beast boy became blurry.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered to him, then realising that there was no one around, she glanced nervously at the floor before speaking a little louder.

"I didn't mean to cause all this trouble, you know," she droned, in her subtle tones. "I never meant to hurt you. To hurt Terra."

The hand twitched slightly. Raven stifled a sob.

"So now, I'm wondering if you can hear me. If you can't hear me then I guess I'm wasting my breath. But it doesn't matter anymore. Nothing matters anymore. Except that you wake up," she murmured, running a hand along his arm. "Please. I don't think that I—we could go on if you never woke up."

There was no response from the still figure. Raven swallowed and looked at his arm as she traced a pattern on it with her finger, which she remembered from one of her many spell books, whilst thinking of what to say.

"I guess in the end there was no way that either of us could win, was there? Either way, we were going to end up hurting someone. And now, I feel like everything is my fault. So I'm not going to do anything to make you feel the same as I do, Beast boy. Because there's nothing I can do. And I'm not going to force you to wake up by confessing my undying love for you, because that's not who I am. But I'm here because I'm your friend."

Raven paused, feeling a little more confident in what she was saying but simultaneously she felt overwhelming tiredness seeping over her skinny frame. She was exhausted. Resting her head against the bed she gave a yawn.

"Your friends need you, Garfield," she whispered, her head resting against his hand. "We need you."

As her eyes began to close she softly sang the song she remembered.

"Whenever you're in trouble,

Whenever you may need me,

I will fight for you,

I will help you through,

Whenever life's deceiving,

I'll give you new meaning,

No matter where you are,

You're always in my heart,

Whenever you're in trouble,

I will be right here."

As the last word passed her lips she fell into a dead sleep.

Raven felt a stirring and she opened her eyes blearily. She glanced up at the figure and sat up, her hand still clutching BB's. She saw two emerald pools blinking back at her and she pushed herself up, resisting the urge to throw herself at him and embrace him.

"Beast boy," she breathed, her eyes faltering as she felt tears begin to well. "You're awake."

"I'm awake," nodded the young man, smiling at her. "Are you okay?"

"I'm…fine," replied Raven, feeling slightly awkward. She was all too aware that her hand was caught up with his but didn't quite know how to move it without him noticing.

"Where are the others?" questioned the shapeshifter, rubbing his head groggily.

"They went home. Cy had to recharge his battery so Star flew him back and then Robin followed."

"But you stayed?" queried BB, a slight sense of hope to his voice. Raven felt her cheeks flush.

"Looks like it," she replied, her face deadpan. "So, how do you feel?"

"Weird," confirmed the changeling, pushing himself up. Raven let go of his hand and helped him. "And…confused."

"You were in a concussive state," nodded Raven. "It'll wear off in a while."

"Will it? I just remember those eyes…those scary eyes staring into mine. Dude. That's something I'd rather forget though…"

The changeling petered out as he realised what he was saying and he cleared his throat giving a small laugh – so small Raven almost didn't notice it. She didn't make any comment but sat there expectantly.

"What happened while I was out?" BB managed eventually.

Raven felt her heart grow heavy and weary. It couldn't take much more. "Terra was arrested and put into a mental home. She…she…"

"Raven?" questioned Beast boy, reaching out to her as she felt a few more tears dripping out. She wanted to get a grip, but her human side seemed to be having a field day. She glowered internally at it but managed to look at him as his arm pulled her down so she was sitting on the bed next to his shoulders. She looked down.

"She's sick…really sick," managed the Azarathian, eventually. "She has an obsession with…us…and she's got a type of schizophrenia. I'm really sorry, Beast boy."

"Why?"

"Why?" replied Raven looking up, her cheeks wet with tear stains. "Because she got mad with us and—"

"No," interrupted the shapeshifter, shaking his head. "Why are you sorry?"

"Because I feel like it's my fault. She saw…me…kiss you," Raven said with some discomfort. Beast boy's shoulders drooped.

"Oh, man," he said softly. "And?"

"And, I succeeded in toppling her over the edge. So you know, I destroyed her life, kissed her boyfriend and oh, by the way sent her insane," growled Raven sarcastically, her eyes shaking with fury. "Stupid, stupid girl."

"Yeah, she was."

"I was talking about me," uttered Raven, in a dry voice. Beast boy gave a small chuckle, and Rae's world was lit up with a sudden bright light. She felt so much better now he was here, talking to her, listening to her, caring about what she said. He was awake! Nothing else mattered to her anymore but the fact that he was there with her.

"So…"

"So."

"Aren't you going back to the tower?"

"I was waiting for you to wake up…so now I guess, yeah," replied Rae, her long lilac tresses swaying as she turned her head to face him. "You're okay, right?"

"I'm okay," answered BB slowly. But he didn't look so sure. "Sort of."

"Confused?" asked Raven, her eyes filled with understanding. BB nodded, then put his head on one side.

"I'm sort of glad though," he said suddenly, his eyes glinting as he turned to face Raven. "Because I don't think I could've lived if she'd killed you."

"What?" questioned Rae, her eyes flickering as her heart rate quickened. "What?"

"I don't love Terra, Raven," Beast boy explained, reaching up and stroking her cheek as he wiped the tears away. "When you asked me that time down in the kitchen I realised that I didn't. I care about her a lot. Because I never thought that I'd get the person I loved. Because I thought that they didn't love me."

"And do they love you?" asked Raven, feeling an apprehensive yet excited emotion which she had never felt before. She tried to smile but could just look at him numbly, and wait for an answer.

"I don't know," answered BB, truthfully. "But I don't think I can wait my whole life to find out."

"Then maybe," Raven countered, the look in his eyes giving him away. "Maybe you'd better do something drastic…"

Beast boy leant up towards her and all at once Raven felt that feeling she had done those few months ago. That love and ardour that she had longed for. And it was all from the one person who she loved with all her heart.

This time there were no ties.

This time there was no Terra.

This time there was only love and time to spare.

From behind the synthetic window, the nurse smiled.

Weeee! I did it! I FINALLY STOPPED PROCRASTINATING AND WROTE SOME SERIOUS BBxR FLUFF! Mwaha, and no Terra to spoil it for them either! (:

It's not the end. Tho' I quite think this is a nice place to stop I want to write more. I have more to say. So I hope you'll forgive me for perhaps ruining what some may believe to be a perfect ending.

By the by…DID YOU REALLY THINK I'D LET BB DIE! C'mon people, this is Chibi we're talking about! The sucker for the good ole fluffiness! X3

I'd also like to point out that this is so far turning out to be the longest story I have put up on And I'm not even finished lol!

Well, that's enough of my senseless waffle. Keep on reviewing and I'll write some more soon!

I'm really sorry to do this but due to my stupid rush I can't write any replies to reviews but I promise you I will soon, k? Thanks to all who reviewed!

Still love y'all! (:

xChibix