A/N: This chapter wouldn't exist if it were not for the fantastic subplot Unspoken helped me develop. I hope you can be patient with what this chapter brings.

Chapter 8

The Penalties of Repression

Sara set the table waiting for Grissom to come home from his second autopsy briefing. She nervously set down the last fork before running over to the stereo and playing Grissom's favorite music; classical. She topped off the romantic setting by lighting two candles and placing them on the kitchen table. As she thought the place setting was everything to her liking, she patiently waited on the couch for her "husband" to greet her with his presence.

"You have one last chance Sara. Don't blow this, he'll just hide back in his shell and will never breech the topic once more…You can't make love to someone the way he did to me without feeling anything. He is lying to protect me from something…But what?"

Sara jumped as she heard Grissom's keys slid into the door. As he entered, he noticed the time and effort Sara had taken in preparing dinner and he could only hope that she didn't have ulterior motives…

"There is only so much holding back I can do…" Grissom thought as Sara stood at the back of him and slowly slid off his jacket.

"Sara…I hope that all this effort isn't to seduce me." Grissom arched an eyebrow as Sara tried to suppress her smile.

"Why would I do a thing like that Grissom?" As Sara smiled as bolt of lightening made them both jump in response.

"I'm glad I made it back before the storm…What is for dinner?" Grissom asked.

"Umm, actually I didn't know what you liked so I ordered pizza…Vegetarian of course…" Sara pointed to the large pizza box on the kitchen table. Grissom sat down on a seat directly across from Sara, he hated vegetarian but he figured he should be polite and eat a piece.

"So what did you find out about the vic?" Sara inquired as she picked off several black olives.

"The victim went by the name of Sherry Olmenoff, she was the daughter of Frank Olmenoff, the industrialist. The coroner found carpet fibers on her pants making her believe that she was dragged out of her home after she was hung. I agree that Sherry was placed in the Nouvelle's backyard but I just don't know why yet…"

"Well Mrs. Nouvelle definitely didn't commit murder, she has an alibi. She was out doing some shopping when the murder supposedly occurred. Several store clerks remember her. We're back to square one I suppose…" Sara allowed the information to sink in, jumping once more when a bolt of lightening hit the home. This time the force of the storm knocked out the power.

"Luckily we have candles…" Sara noted. She grabbed the dirty plates and placed them in the sink before turning back to Grissom. "You want to talk?…I mean, there's nothing else to do…" Grissom's brow furrowed as he knew very well what would be the topic of conversation.

"Alright Sara…" He walked over to the couch and motioned for her to join him. She made a tactful decision of sitting as far away from as possible to give him his space and allow him some room to think.

"Grissom…Umm…You must know already what I want to ask you…" Sara nervously fiddled with an oval necklace which lay dangerously close to the opening of her low cut black dress. His gaze focused on her neckline which showed way too much cleavage for his liking.

"Sara…You know that the answer is no…We can't be together." He snapped his attention back to her eyes which held the reflection of the candles burning from afar.

"Why not? You're telling me that you can just make love to me and forget about it…And then have the audacity to ask me to do the same…?" She was trying to keep her frustration bottled, she needed him to stay calm and think.

"Because Sara…That's the way it is, plain and simple." His eyes focused once more on her skin which held a radiant glow, he didn't know if it was from the candles or from the fact that she was in love. He could only hope it was because of the latter.

"Fine…" Sara tried taking a different approach to Grissom opening up to her. "You know I've told you a lot about my family but I haven't heard much about yours…Tell me something about your childhood…" The question made Grissom's heart lurch forward.

"I can't…" He swallowed hard waiting for Sara's next move.

"What is with you, Grissom? You expect me to open up to you, yet you won't do the same? You know so much about me, but you're still a mystery. Something has been bothering you since you took this operation! Just tell me what the hell is bothering you or else I'm going to Culpepper so that he can get it out of you!" Sara's yelling ceased as she got up angrily off of the couch and stood against the wall of the living room. Her face was flush from frustration as she waited for Grissom do to something…Anything. His anger couldn't be held in check any longer as he jumped off from the couch and approached Sara with rage gleaming in his eyes. He took one last look at Sara before slamming his fist through the wall above her head. Sara was stunned and unable to move as she watched Grissom's anger fuel second by second.

"Why can't you just leave it alone Sara…?" Grissom asked through gritted teeth.

"Because… 'I want to know why you're so angry.'" Sara quoted, trying not to allow Grissom see her knees shake in fear. She never saw him this angry, maybe she really should have just left him alone. As another bolt of lightening flashed, Grissom startled Sara by twisting her arm and throwing her forcibly back on the couch. The beat of rain and the sound of Sara's staggered breathing were the only sounds which filled their home. Not thinking straight, Grissom climbed on top of Sara, pinning her down beneath him.

"You want to know what it was like for my mother, in a home that you would fear to come home to every night?" Grissom's eyes were still black with rage as he continued to hold Sara down against her will. Sara cried out in pain as she struggled to be released from his grasp.

"Grissom! Stop, you're scaring me…" Her cries were not heard as Grissom's mind rein- acted his father's interplay with his mom.

"He would come home from work…And she would be too scared to fight back…Just like you…" Grissom's mind was no longer in the present as he continued to reflect on his father's abuse. Holding Sara's hand's tighter above her head he watched as the candle light danced on her skin, arousing him and tangling up with his anger.

"You want to know what it would be like to be the wife of Gil Grissom?" He whispered hoarsely into her ear before allowing his left hand to feel Sara up her skirt.

"Grissom please stop…" Sara cried. Her cries were useless as his mind blocked out all sound. He began to kiss her neck, sucking on her hard. A red mark formed on her skin. Pleased with his actions, he moved his tongue down to her chest. "You know you like it…"

"Griss stop…" Sara was unable to move as Grissom's grip was to strong. She began to shiver in fear as her repressed childhood memories of being raped started to bubble to the surface. "Stop it now…Please…" Tears fell down her face as another flash of lightening illuminated her face. Grissom's eyes were even more frightening in the light; they were as black as night- the color of his intensified anger.

"Shhh…" He held one hand over her mouth as he continued to feel up Sara's dress; stroking the inside of her thighs. As a memory of his mother's gown being torn to shreds flashed in his mind, he mimicked the image by tearing at Sara's. It tore too easily as Grissom relished in the sound of the fabric ripping at seams. Her chest was exposed, but that wasn't enough for him. He ripped the fabric harder until he was able to slide off the dress with ease. Sara was too scared to speak any longer, helpless and frightened of the depth of Grissom's anger and arousal.

Sara screamed as another flash of lightening hit, finally realizing what he had done. She began to fight with all of her power to get Grissom off of her, imagining him as the one who had raped her in the past. She tried to use the strength she never had before.

"Why do you have to be so stubborn?" He whispered once more in her ear before cupping one of her breasts. "Just let it happen…" As one last roar of thunder hit the ground from afar Grissom finally snapped out of it as he locked on her eyes. Sara shook uncontrollably with fear as her pupils were wide from the severity of his actions. Not realizing what he had done Grissom got up from Sara, feeling a sense of panic over take him.

"What the hell did I do?" Just as Grissom was about to explain, Sara jumped off of the

couch and ran into the bedroom, locking herself in.