A/N: One more for the road... don't read this and drive please. And Nicole, I hope this is enough cause Dan bashing takes away time from whorebie bashing, though I like it as much!

Title: Charmed Together.

Chapter 13: Day 12

Paige and Piper had both set-up shop in front of the fridge since early that morning. They were both eating raw meat and other junk. Leo watched them with awed. Dan walked in. "Leo, can I have a word with you?" The boy next door asked.

"Um, sure?" Leo said uncertain as he and Dan walked to the solarium. "So what do you want to chat about?"

"How do you feel about Cole?" Leo blushed. Dan smiled.

"I... well... Cole's a great guy." Leo stammered.

"How great?" Dan continued.

"Well he's... " Leo stopped to think. "Why are you asking me about Cole?"

"Um... I'm most certainly not trying to get in Piper's pants!" Oh subtle.

"You!" Leo started to stalk towards Dan. "You and your stupid greasy head! You're trying to break Piper and me up again! You stupid freak!" Leo punched Dan! (Gasp!)

"Ow." Dan rubbed his face. "Leo..."

"Oh I'm so not finished, bitch!" Whoa! Leo grew a pair. "I've been waiting to do this for four years!" Leo kicked Dan in the... orbs. "I don't care if you were good with Piper!" Another kick. "I don't care if you were my favorite baseball player!" Ooh, another kick. "And I most certainly don't care that I have a poster of you on the roof of my bed so I have something to see while I'm with Piper!" One last hard kick. "You suck ass!" Leo yelled as he left Dan fall on the floor, shaking. Leo breathed and left the room. Zankou walked in, ruining a pair of heels that belong to Phoebe.

"Oh. My. Piper!" Zankou kneeled down beside Dan. Which was hard in Phoebe's leather pants. "Oh are you ok?"

"...no." Was all Dan could say.

At the attic, Prue woke up. She shook slightly and look around. She was naked? And there was someone sleeping beside her. And he was naked? "Oh GOD NO!" Prue stood and back away from naked Jack.

"That was great, Prue." Jack smiled as he got up.

"Ew, how the fuck did you get me to sleep with you?"

"Well I did what I always do. I knock you out with a hard object and-"

"You! YOU'RE SICK!" Prue telekinetically pushed him to the wall.

"Mom never complained!" Prue shuddered and left.

"Wanna... you know?" Jack said to no one. Oh wait, it was to his left hand. Wait! Gross! And he made it nod! That's just wrong.

At the bathroom, (yes, we're back in here.) Phoebe was showering. "Wanna get rowdy, wanna get a little un-rule-y, get fired up in a hurry, wanna get dirty, its about time that I came to start the party-"

"Phoebe?" Leo said as she peeked in.

"Leo! I'm naked!" Phoebe squealed.

"Aren't you always. I mean, practically."

"What do you want?" Phoebe kept on showering.

"Dan tried to get me and Cole together."

Phoebe opened the shower and stormed out. Forgetting she was naked. She walked down the stairs where Zankou had managed to get Dan back up. "Mess with my Cole huh? I'll show you bitch!" She kicked Dan on the crotch. Oh he's so not having kids now.

"Phoebe!" Zankou screamed then paused. "Nice orbs." He complimented.

"Thanks. They're real." Oh they are so not.

"Hmm... wanna do it on Dan?"

"Sure!" They did so.

Back at the kitchen, the pregnant women's water broke. Oh no!

To be continued...